How Paige McCullers Won Me Back
by subway20
Summary: Paily AU. Sequel to "How Paige McCullers Saved My Life". Paige and Em are both college students in California. Yeah, they made it. But... it's Paily, so it's complicated. Expect drama, angst, and of course Paily romance. (And a bit of McHastings, too, because I can't help it).
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: So, guys. This story is the sequel to How Paige McCullers Saved My Life, my first Paily fic. For whatever reasons, I really fought writing this sequel, and instead of it I wrote other Paily fics first, that some of you might have read, or not.**

 **But the desire to write the sequel was always in my mind, and some of you asked me about it, so... I wanted to give it a try.** **Even though it's technically a sequel, it can be read by itself, I think. (But it will probably make more sense if you've read HPMCSML).**

 **I have to warn you all, though: this fic will be darker than HPMCSML. There will be some angst... but if you've read my other stories, you already know that I'm a real Paily shipper. And that I love our girls. Keep that in mind! ;)**

 **Anyway, this story takes place about one year after HPMCSML.**

 **As always, a BIG thank you to my betareader** _ **siophiefandom,**_ **who convinced me that the story was worth posting, and who made a really amazing job at betareading. If it wasn't for her, you wouldn't be reading this new fic.**

* * *

 _ **San Francisco, California - Present day**_

When Emily Fields started her shift at the Blue Bird Café that Sunday morning, she was expecting the day to be quite pleasant.

On weekends, unlike during the week, customers were usually nice and took their time to enjoy their breakfast or brunch . And the tips were better, too.

Emily had been working at the small café for almost three months. The Blue Bird was located in the North Beach area, one of San Francisco's nicest districts.

Her schedule was perfect: she worked Thursday evenings and Sundays, and the part-time job fit perfectly with her classes and swim practise at Berkeley.

The ride from Berkeley was a little long, but all the cool jobs on campus were already taken by the time she started looking, and finding a job suitable for her busy schedule had been hard enough.

And Emily Fields loved working in San Francisco. She had completely fall in love with the city since her arrival a few months ago, for her freshman year at Cal.

That morning, she was covering the inside shift with another employee, Rebecca, who also was a college student. Most of the patrons had chosen the classic Sunday brunch fare, which made it simplier for the waitresses, but they still had to make frequent trips to the kitchen.

Emily had her apron around her waist, and her hair in a ponytail, exciting the kitchen with a heavy tray in her arms, when she stopped dead in her tracks.

She almost collided with Rebecca, who looked at her, frowning. Emily's eyes were glued to a group of customers who had just entered the café: three boys and two girls, probably students. Two of the boys and one of the girls were wearing Stanford hoodies. They all sat at a table near the window, and started to look at the menus, chatting animatedly.

Emily was still motionless, as if she had just seen a ghost.

"Emily!" Rebecca said. "Are you okay?"

Emily quietly nodded. She was actually gripping the tray so tightly that her fingers ached. Rebecca, concerned, frowned again.

"Is it because these guys are from Stanford? You only serve Berkeley students now?" Rebecca asked jokingly, in an attempt to lighten her coworkers's mood.

"I have to take a break," Emily stammered. "Can... can you take care of them, please?" she pleaded, motioning towards the table occupied by the students.

Without waiting for her colleague's answer, Emily put the tray on the bar and rushed to the back exit. The door led to a small patio, at the back of the café. Emily leaned against the brick wall, her eyes closed, her breathing short.

What she had feared the most since her arrival in San Francisco had just happened. Emily Fields had crossed path with Paige McCullers, again.

The girl she had loved so much, and the one who broke her heart.

* * *

Inside the café, at the table where the Stanford students were sitting, the atmosphere was relaxed, but one of the girls wasn't joining in on the conversation.

Paige McCullers, her body stiff, had her eyes fixed on the door which she had just seen the raven-haired waitress barge out of. Her heart was banging in her chest and thoughts were racing in her head.

A name, especially.

Emily. Emily. _Emily._

One of the boys suddenly noticed Paige's odd attitude and waved his hand in front of her face. "Hey, McCullers? You still with us? What do you want to order? Heather and Steve can't decide."

"I don't care, whatever," Paige said in a blank tone.

The other students exchanged puzzled looks.

"Everything all right, Paige?" Heather asked.

"I have... I have to go," Paige stammered before quickly grabbing her backback and jumping off her chair. She almost collided with Rebecca in her hurry to get out of the café. The young waitress stared at her, shocked, and Paige mumbled a few words of apology.

Once outside, Paige ran her hand through her hair as she tried to regain her composure. But her heart was still racing widly.

 _Of all cafés in San Francisco, we have to choose the one where Emily Fields is working. Fantastic._

The California girl sat on the nearest bench and took her head in her hands. She tried to steady her breath, with no success.

She got up and decided to take a few steps. _Get a grip, McCullers,_ Paige told herself while walking around the café.

The main road was busy, but the back of the restaurant abutted a street that looked quiet enough. Paige turned left and quickly reached a small paved courtyard.

Someone was already there. Leaning against the brick wall, her eyes shut, her arms wrapped tightly around her midsection, Emily Fieds was also trying to pull herself together.

Paige stopped dead in her tracks, her eyes glued to the tanned girl. Emily's hair was lighter than she remembered. Probably an effect of the Californian sun, Paige thought. Emily's figure was still slender and toned at the same time.

 _She's still so beautiful. Maybe even more. California suits her._

Paige took a few steps forward, and Emily opened her eyes. The Rosewood girl was startled when she recognized the person in front of her.

"What are you doing here? Did you follow me?"

Her tone was dry and harsh.

Paige shook her head in denial. "No, I... Emily, I didn't even know that you were working here. Really, I'm sorry."

"Just go away," Emily snapped.

"Emily..."

"I don't want to talk to you! I don't want to see you. I can't even stand to THINK about you!" Emily almost yelled.

Paige dipped her head, feeling distressed. She had expected Emily to be angry, but she was wounded by Emily's words.

 _What were you thinking, McCullers? Of course she still hates you._

"Okay, I'm leaving," the auburn girl said in a whisper. "I'll leave you alone, Emily."

"Don't even say my name. I don't want you to talk to me anymore. Go! Leave! That's what you do best anyway," Emily snapped.

Paige stepped back, still staring at Emily with teary eyes, before turning back and running away.

Emily let her body slide down the wall and sat on the ground. She took her head in her hands before bursting into tears.

* * *

 _ **Flashback - California, eight months earlier.**_

Emily Fields was standing amid the hustle and bustle of the Oakland International Airport, her luggage at her feet. Her plane had landed half an hour late, and she was still feeling a little dizzy. The flight had been uneventful, but there were so many people around her now, so much noise, and even though she hadn't been out of the airport yet, she could already tell that the light was different here. So bright. Almost vibrant.

She checked her phone one more time. Still no calls or text messages from Paige. Her Californian girlfriend had assured her she'd be there to pick her up at the aiport. Emily was beginning to feel a little worried, and disappointed. She was so impatient to see Paige again. The two girls hadn't seen each other for months, since Paige's departure from Rosewood after a two-week stay with her swim team, the Oakland Jets.

Now it was time for the Rosewood Sharks to visit their peers in California. The team and their coach had flown to San Francisco two days before, but Emily had asked to stay in Rosewood a little longer, to spend two more days with her dad, who was home on leave - something that didn't happen very often.

Flying by herself had been a little bit worrisome, but also quite exciting. Emily had never flown without her parents, and she had never been so far away from Rosewood before. The longest plane trip she'd taken was a trip to Florida with her mother and father, several summers before.

Emily had been beyond exited about this trip. She had missed Paige so much. Of course, the two girls had kept in touch, texting almost everyday and Skyping at least once a week, but it wasn't the same as being able to see the girl you loved -being able to hug her, to kiss her... Emily sighed and checked her phone again.

 _Damn, Paige. Where are you, and what are you doing?_

Of course, she could call Paige herself, but Emily didn't want to appear too clingy. Just before leaving Philadephia, she had texted Paige her arrival time, and the auburn girl had assured her she'd be there. Only, she wasn't.

Just when Emily was about to give up and go look for a taxi, she heard a male voice behind her.

"Emily? Emily Fields?"

She turned around quickly to face a tall young man, with curly chestnut hair and green eyes. The man was smiling broadly at her. Emily stared at him, puzzled. She was sure that she had never seen this man before, but his features looked oddly familiar.

Seeing Emily's confused look, the young man quickly said: "I'm Tim. Paige's uncle. I recognized you from the photos. The ones Paige showed me," he explained.

"Oh," Emily said. "I thought that..." she stammered, looking all around her.

"Paige is here too, of course," Tim said, chuckling. "She went to check the arrival gate at the main desk, again. I told her it was useless, but she was so impatient to see you again, she just couldn't remain in one place."

"Oh," Emily said again, the relief obvious in her voice. "I see."

The young man leaned forward and grabbed Emily's bags.

"How was your flight, Emily?" he asked politely.

"It was all right, I mean it was great," Emily said. "I was a little anxious at first, with it being such a long flight and all, but everything went pretty well, I guess."

"Have you ever been to California before?"

"No, never."

"Well, welcome to San Francisco, then. Though technically, we're in Oakland."

"Thank you, Mr. McCullers."

The man burst into laughter. "Oh no, thank god, I'm not a McCullers. I'm Paige's mother's brother. The laid-back side of the family. Quite the opposite of good old Nick," he said with a wink.

Emily smiled, not knowing what to say. Before she could think of an answer, a tornado threw herself into her arms and hugged her so tightly that Emily nearly squeaked.

"Emily," Paige said in that unmistakably husky voice. "Em. You're here, at last."

* * *

Emily and Paige were in the backseat, beaming at each other and holding hands. From the driver's seat, Tim peeked at them and smiled.

"So girls," he said. "Do you want me to drive you to Casa McCullers right away, or do you need some time alone?"

"Tim!" Paige protested, blushing furiously.

"Come on Paigey, I'm just kidding," her uncle smirked. "I just wanted to make my niece uncomfortable. That's my job. Sorry for that, by the way, Emily," he added.

Emily smiled nervously. She didn't know what exactly Paige had told her family about her. She didn't even know that Paige had an uncle, not to mention one who seemed to share more than just good looks with his niece: he had that quirky sense of humor, too.

Picking up on her girlfriend's thoughts and discomfort, Paige squeezed Emily's hand and offered her an apologetic smile.

"Don't listen to Tim. He likes to tease me."

"And you like to tease me, too," Tim retorted. "You know Emily, Paigey is like my annoying kid sister."

"Not as annoying as you, Timmy boy," Paige snorted.

"Don't call me Timmy boy!"

"Well, don't call me Paigey."

"Okay, _Paige_ , we'd better stop now. Emily is going to think we California folks are crazy."

"Oh no, it's okay," Emily smiled. She was beginning to enjoy the easy banter between the two. They were really like siblings.

 _I wonder why Paige never told me about her uncle? Well, to be honest, I don't know much about her family. We never talk about that._

Emily felt Paige's eyes on her. The chestnut-haired girl was studying her carefully. Her big brown eyes were sparkling with joy and excitement.

"Hey, Em," Paige said in a lower voice. "I'm so happy you're finally here. You're even more beautiful than before, if that's possible."

Emily blushed, her heart swelling. "Always the sweet talker, McCullers," she whispered.

Paige grinned widely. "Only for you, Em. Only for you."

* * *

 **A/N: As always... reviews and comments are highly welcome. I'm really, really anxious about this story and as I said before, the writing was a real struggle. Your reviews will keep me going (or not!... but honest feedback is always welcome). Thank you so much for reading!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Guys! You're really amazing. All of you. Seriously, I wasn't expecting such great reviews and follows and favs. I'm so glad that you found interest in that sequel. Thank you for your patience, and, again, for all the great feedback. Really, it means the world to me.**

 **About this story - I will try to update once a week, every Friday, if I can! I'll do my best!**

 **Don't forget what I said - there might be some angst, and the road might be bumpy, but have faith in me. And in Paige and Emily, of course. ;)**

 **...As always, thank you so much _siophiefandom_ for being my awesome betareader! (as well as a major Paily fanfic writer - of course).**

* * *

 _ **University of Pennsylvania - Present day**_

Spencer Hastings was in the middle of a study session in U-Penn's main library when her phone buzzed for the fifth time in ten minutes. Spencer sighed and grabbed the offending device. Her brows furrowed when she saw the name on the screen: _Paige McCullers_. The California girl had called her twice and had sent her three text messages. The last one simply said, "please call me back? it's important."

Spencer gathered her belongings and put them back in her classy, all-leather briefcase. She stood up and headed to the exit in her usual long, elegant stride. Once outside, she sat down on the steps of the old building and pressed the call- back button on her cell phone.

Her recipient answered immediately.

"Spencer?"

"McCullers," Spencer said soberly.

"Spencer... thank you for calling me back," Paige said, and from her tone Spencer could tell that something was wrong.

"Hey, are you okay, Paige?" the younger Hastings asked. "Did something happen?"

"No, no... well, I mean, yes, sort of" Paige answered in an uncertain tone.

Spencer frowned.

"McCullers! For heaven's sake, what's going on?"

" I ...I saw her," Paige said. "I just ran into her, and..."

Spencer didn't have to ask who "her" was.

She sighed internally. "Okay," she said in a calm voice. I guess it was bound to happen someday. You're both living in the Bay Area after all. Though, technically, you two were unlikely to cross paths, according to the laws of probability, but that's another story. So... how did it go?"

She heard Paige sniffle at the other end of the line.

"Okaaaay," Spencer said. "So, I guess it didn't go well."

She heard more sniffling in response.

"Paige!" Spencer said in a stern voice. "Are you going to tell me, or what? After all, I suppose that's why you called me in the first place."

"I'm really sorry to bother you, Spencer," Paige said, souding miserable. "I shouldn't have called you."

"McCullers!" Spencer roared. "Stop that immediately!"

"Stop what?" Paige asked.

"That! That... stupid self-pity. It doesn't suit you, not at all. Seriously, McCullers! If I were next to you right now, I would... I would shake you like a rag doll! Hell, I would even slap you!"

Surprisingly, her words caused Paige to let out a small laugh.

"Wow, Hastings. That's rude, even for you."

"Talk to me," Spencer said in a softer tone. "Tell me what happened, Paige."

Paige nodded, even though Spencer couldn't see her, and, between sniffles, began to tell her friend about her brief encounter with Emily at the back of the Blue Bird Café.

"...And then, she told me that she couldn't stand to talk to me or to see me. That she couldn't even bear the THOUGHT of me."

"Ouch." Spencer said.

"Yeah," Paige sighed. "It was... awful, Spencer. I so wanted to talk to her... to apologize, and... but I couldn't say anything. She was so distressed, and so mad at me. So I just left."

"She wouldn't have listened to you anyway," Spencer said. "Emily is still... very angry, you know."

"No way," Paige snorted. "I... I was expecting that, believe me. The anger. She has every reason to be mad at me. But I wasn't expecting the hate..."

Spencer let out a deep sigh. "Paige... Emily doesn't hate you. Well, I don't think she really does. But... you hurt her badly last summer, you know that."

"...I know," Paige answered after a while. _And I will never forgive myself for hurting her._

"I... I miss her like crazy, Spence," Paige said in a vulnerable voice.

"I know you do," Spencer answered.

"But that can't be fixed, right?"

Spencer sighed deeply. "McCullers. Do you really want my opinion?"

"That's why I called you in the first place, Hastings."

"Nah, you just called me because you needed a shoulder to cry on."

"Yeah, that too," Paige chuckled, feeling slightly better.

"Don't do anything right now."

"I wasn't gonna..."

"Oh come on Paige. You were _so_ planning to go back to that café, throw yourself at Emily's feet and beg for her forgiveness."

"Now, that's a little more melodramatic than what I had in mind."

"If you say so. But I know you, and I know her. Just give her some space for now. Not for too long, just a couple of days. Emily works at the café on Sundays, and also on Thursdays nights. I'm gonna try to lay the groundwork for you. You know, to make sure she will at least listen to you. But I can't promise anything."

"Thank you, Spencer," Paige said. "You cannot imagine how important this is to me."

"Well, I think I have a pretty good idea, actually," Spencer retorted before hanging up.

Another phone conversation with Paige, a few months earlier, suddenly came back to her mind:

 _"...I still love her, Spencer. I still love her."_

 _The pain was obvious in Paige's voice, and Spencer started feeling her anger falter, but she tried to keep a steady voice._

 _"So why, McCullers? WHY?"_

 _"I don't know!" Paige almost yelled. "I don't know."_

 _"Really?" Spencer asked in a wry tone. "You don't know why you cheated on Emily? Come on, Paige. I don't buy it."_

 _"I just... I felt so lonely, Spencer. It's...I can't even find the words to describe it. I know it's no excuse. But I just needed...some comfort, I guess."_

 _Spencer almost flinched. She knew that Paige was having a rough time at the moment. She wanted to tell her that she wasn't alone, that she really cared for her. But now wasn't the right time._

 _"So, that's all it was, then? Comfort sex?"_

 _Paige sighed._

 _"Do we really need to put a label on it?"_

 _"I think that we do, yes. If you really want to figure it out."_

 _"To figure what out?"_

 _"What's left. Or not. Between you and Em."_

* * *

After her conversation with Paige, Spencer put back her cell phone in her pocket and headed to one of those awesome coffee trucks that were flourishing on the campus. She definitely needed caffeine - and lots of it.

She knew she had to call Emily in Berkeley. And better sooner than later. But she had to check something first.

She took out her phone and quickly texted her other best friend, Aria Montgomery: 'Has Em called you today?"

The answer came almost immediately: 'No, why?'

Spencer took a long sip of her large, extra strong coffee, and sat on the nearest bench. 'We have a situation', she texted her friend. 'Em and Paige just ran into each other.'

Less than a minute later, Spencer's phone went off. The thin brunette didn't even check who the caller was before answering.

"Hello, Aria," she said soberly.

"Hi Spence," the petite brunette answered. "I've just come back from the library."

"Same here," Spencer said. "How is it going for you at Hollis?"

Aria was a freshman student at Hollis university and had chosen literature as major.

"Oh, I still find everything very exciting, and so stimulating," Aria said. "But you called me for a reason, didn't you? What's going on with Em and Paige?"

Spencer sighed deeply. "Long story short, Emily bumped into the-one-who-shouldn't-be-named, in the Blue Bird Café yesterday morning."

"Oh," Aria said. "Well, I guess it was inevitable, wasn't it? With both of them living in the San Francisco area. It was only a matter of time."

"Not at all," Spencer countered. "Millions of people live in the Bay Area. Stastistically, it was unlikely for them to... run into each other like they did."

"If you say so," Aria answered, biting a smile. She knew a lot about her friend's quirks, especially when it came to probability.

"Anyway, it happened. But wait, Spencer... Did Paige know that Emily worked at the Blue Bird?"

"Not from me," Spencer said. "I"ve never told her. Emily made me promise never to share any details of her life in California with Paige. Of course she knows that Paige and I have kept in touch. But we have... this kind of agreement... of the non-verbal variety... I don't talk about Paige with her, and vice versa. Unless it's a question of life or death, of course."

"You're in a difficult position, Spence," Aria said softly.

Spencer let out another deep sigh.

"You're telling me. I don't even know how it started. Or how I got myself into it."

"You just happen to know the true meaning of friendship, Spencer Hastings. And Emily and Paige are both your friends. No matter what happened between them."

"Thanks, Aria," Spencer said, feeling a little relieved. "You're right. But what do you think I should do now? I just talked to Paige, she was really disoriented. Apparently, Emily said some very harsh words, and basically told her she could go to hell. Or worse."

"Well, that was predictable," Aria countered. "You can't really blame Emily for that. After what happened at swim camp last summer..."

"Yeah, I know, Aria, but still, Paige seemed so upset, so I said I was gonna call Em, and you know, try to calm her down..."

"Wow, wait, Spencer. You really think you should do that now? You know Emily. She's the sweetest girl, but when she's mad, she's... mad," Aria said.

"I know. I know! But I can't... I mean, I have to try. I don't want to choose sides, you know? Emily is my childhood friend. She's like... my sister. I feel the same for you and Hanna, of course."

"I know that, Spence," Aria said in her soft voice.

"But, Paige... even though I know what she did to Em was wrong, even though I was very angry at her at the time for hurting Em, I just... I just can't let her down. She's my friend too."

Spencer's voice almost broke at that, and Aria could tell that her friend needed some comfort.

"Spence... you don't have to choose. Be there for both of them, as you've always been. You're the connection between them... and I'm sure they both know that."

Spencer let out a wry laugh. "Yes, I bet they do. That's the problem... Well, thank you anyway, Aria. I think I'm gonna call Emily now."

"Okay, Spencer. And if you need me, for anything, you know I'll be there. Whenever you need."

"Thanks, Ar. Love you." Spencer said before hanging up.

She finished her almost-cold coffee in one gulp, and then took a deep breath.

"Okay..." she whispered to herself before checking the time and then dialing Emily's number. Spencer's fingers were trembling slightly - and not only because of the caffeine.

* * *

When Emily answered the call, she heard her name spoken by an overly perky Spencer: "Emily! What's up, gal!"

It wasn't a very Spencer-y way to start a conversation, and Emily's answer was very brief: "Hello, Spencer."

"Oh yeah, sure, hello. So, Em, I know it's early, but I just wanted to... um, say hi," Spencer stammered. _Lame,_ she thought immediately. _Lame._

"Well, hi," Emily answered matter-of-factly. She had a slight idea of why Spencer was calling her, and she was determined not to make it easy for her.

There was a silence, and then Spencer asked: "so, um, how is it going for you in California, um, say, these days?"

"I was fine, until yesterday morning," Emily countered. "But you already know that, don't you, Spencer? That's why you're calling?"

"Well," Spencer said, at a loss for words. "Well, um, yesterday morning? What happened?"

"Oh come on, Spencer," Emily said sharply. "You already talked to _her_ , right?"

"...Paige called me," Spencer confessed.

Emily closed her eyes and sighed deeply.

"Of course she did. She called you and she told you what happened at the café, how mean I was, and how devastated she is now. She played the victim card."

"That's not... that's not at all what she said, Emily," Spencer objected.

A headache was starting at the base of her skull, and she began to massage her temples with her free hand.

Emily didn't answer, and Spencer spoke again, in a firmer voice this time.

"Emily. I don't really know what to say, except... except that I really feel sorry for you. For both of you, actually. It's too bad you two..."

"Spencer, no! You're going to take her side again? But you know perfectly well what happened last summer. How she hurt me."

"Yes, I do. Believe me Em, I haven't forgotten. But it was months ago, Emily, and even though she was wrong, entirely wrong, you... you should give her a chance to talk to you."

"There's nothing left to say," Emily said. "I'm over her. I don't care about how she's doing. I don't care about her at all."

"I see," Spencer said, not believing a single word. "You made yourself perfectly clear, Em."

"And when you talk to Paige again, tell her to stay away from me. That's all."

"I think you already told her that yesterday, Emily," Spencer replied curtly. "And for the record, I'd rather not be caught in the crossfire."

"Well, you put yourself in that position when you decided to keep in touch with her. Bye, Spencer," Emily snapped before hanging up.

Spencer threw her phone in her bag and her coffee cup in the nearest trash can.

 _Well done, Hastings. You managed to piss her off even more. Emily is mad at you, now. And Paige will be so disappointed. Those two idiots. How did we end up here in the first place?_

* * *

 **Later that day...**

Emily Fields barged into her dorm room and without a single glance at her roommate, roughly threw her bag on her bed before sitting at her desk.

"Hello to you too, Emily," the other girl said wryly.

"Yeah, hello," Emily mumbled. She wasn't in the mood to talk. A nd it wasn't as if she and her roomate actually got along. Grace was so boring, and so judgmental.

"A girl came by, earlier," Grace said matter-of-factly. "One of your girlfriends, I guess. Don't know which one, though. She didn't say her name, and they all look alike to me anyway."

"I'm not asking for your opinion," Emily snapped. Her roommate just shrugged at that, unimpressed.

Emily got up and grabbed her gym bag. She took a quick peek in it, checking that everything she needed was there.

"Leaving already?" Grace asked in her annoying high-pitched voice.

"I'm going to the pool," Emily muttered. She hadn't planned to go swimming that morning, but she definitely needed to blow off some steam. And the pool had always been her safe haven, her soothing place.

Emily ran down the steps of the Stern Residence and took a peek at her phone. Valerie had tried to call her several times. She was probably the girl who had showed up at her room earlier. Unless it was Mandy. Or maybe that girl who was hitting on her at the cafeteria yesterday.

Emily shrugged. She didn't need company right now. Maybe later, that evening or that night. Sunday was a good day for wild parties in Berkeley anyway.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Hi everyone! Thank you so much for reading, and special thanks to the reviewers (including the guests of course, too bad I can't answer you personally like I do for the other reviewers).**

 **I guess pretty much everybody (not only Emily!) is mad at Paige right now, and it's perfectly understandable. And the story is from Emily's POV (for now), so...**

 **But just so you know, I LOVE Paige (she's my favorite character in PLL, by far) so I will never make her "the bad guy". Not for too long anyway! :)**

 **Also, a big shout out to my betareader _siophiefandom_ who did an awesome job, as always!**

* * *

When Paige McCullers needed to think things through, she put on her best running gear and went jogging along the beautiful shaded areas of Stanford. The university campus was perfect for that - truth be told, the campus was the perfect place for everything, period. Paige couldn't have hoped for a best place to live in and study. Absolutely everything was top-notch. The classes, the teachers, the facilities - especially for the athletes- like Paige, who was still marveling at the pool complex.

But despite all that, Paige McCullers wasn't happy. Since her arrival in Stanford, her time had been divided between intensive training (in the pool, in the gym, and on the running tracks) and her classes. In short, Paige had immersed herself in Stanford as she would have immersed herself in religion. She was working harder than she had ever worked. It had yielded positive results, of course, in both fields - academic and athletic.

But it had done nothing to diminish Paige's feelings of loneliness and emptiness. Paige had willfully withdrawn from all the social activities that were part of the overall student experience. She wasn't involved in any clubs, she wasn't socializing, she wasn't dating or even hanging out with friends.

Indeed, that Sunday brunch in San Francisco was the first time that she had accepted an invitation to go out with her roommate, Heather, and a few other students.

And it had been a mess. After her confrontation with Emily in the back of the Blue Bird Café, she texted her roommate to tell her that she wasn't feeling well and was going back to Palo Alto. Heather, who had convinced Paige to go out and have some fun for once, had texted her back a few minutes later. Her answer was short: "Okay, do what you want." She wasn't going to make the mistake of asking her again, that was for sure.

That afternoon, the weather was getting worse, the morning sun long gone. A cold wind was blowing, announcing the end of fall. Paige was only wearing a tank top and her sports shorts, but she didn't care. She wasn't afraid of the cold - she was used to feeling it every day, deep inside her body, deep inside her heart.

Paige ran along the tennis courts, the hockey and the softball fields, and then reached the football stadium. Her stride was unusually tensed, her breathing less steady than it had been in the days before. She was trying to concentrate on her pace, but her mind was focused on only one subject. _Emily._

Usually, physical activity and the endorphine high that followed allowed her to feel if not relaxed, at least less stressed out. But not that time. It wasn't working. After almost an hour of intensive running, Paige eventually gave up and decided to head back to her room in Wilbur Hall. Her head down, her breath short, she quickly climbed the stairs to the second floor and entered the room she shared with Heather. Her roommate was there, lying on her bed, a book propped up in her hands. The blonde girl turned her head to look at Paige.

"So?" she simply asked.

Paige shrugged. "I've been running."

"I can see that," Heather said. "I meant this morning. When you just, kind of disappeared. What the hell, Paige?"

The tall brunette shrugged again.

"It's no big deal. I wasn't feeling well. So I left."

"All of a sudden? Like that? You seemed fine just a minute before."

Paige didn't answered, and Heather snorted.

"Okay, McCullers. Forget I asked. But just so you know, the guys were really upset. Especially Mike."

Paige sighed deeply. "What is it with him? I told him many times that I'm gay."

Heather smirked. "Well, he knows that you are. But he won't give up. He's stubborn, just like you, McCullers."

The blonde girl got up and came near Paige, who was sitting on her own bed with a blank look.

"Seriously, Paige, are you okay? You seem weird. I mean weirder than usual."

Paige closed her eyes and sighed internally. Her roommate already thought that she was a weirdo, a total misfit. The incident that morning was another proof, as if she needed any.

"I don't want to talk about it, Heather. But I'm okay. Or I will be."

"If you say so," Heather replied, not sounding convinced at all. "But it's a shame. Your first Sunday brunch in San Fran... the food was great, by the way. Especially the pancakes."

"Good for you," Paige said shortly.

"But the service was poor," Heather went on. "They made us wait for a while. We had to ask for coffee twice. And our waitress was glaring at us with disapproving eyes the whole meal."

Paige stiffened at these words.

"The waitress?"

"Yeah. That blonde chick, Rebecca. We didn't leave any tip for her. She didn't deserve one."

"A... a blonde girl? Rebecca?"

"Well, that was the name on her name tag," Heather said, frowning. "You're getting weirder, if that's even possible, McCullers."

"I'm gonna shower," Paige said, before getting up and leaving the room quickly. Once in the bathroom, she realized that she had forgotten her shower bag in the room.

* * *

Monday had started roughly for Emily Fields. She hadn't heard her alarm clock go off, but her roommate had. Grace had thrown a pillow at her in frustration, startling Emily, who had grumbled a few choice words at the other girl. "You have Sociology class in half an hour," Grace had stated curtly, before heading to the bathroom.

By the time Emily made it to the shower, there was no warm water left, so she had to take a very quick cold shower, and she didn't have time to wash her hair.  
She had only eight minutes to make it to class, and not enough time to have breakfast. So she just grabbed a coffee at the nearest coffee stand. Taking a sip, she had the displeasure of realizing that the barista had put some milk and sugar in it - even though she had ordered a tall Americano, black. Grumbling, she threw the cup into the nearest trash can and made a beeline for the classroom, entering just in time. Of course, all the back seats were already taken. She'd have to sit on the front row, which she hated.

Two hours later, Emily grabbed her belongings and headed out of the classroom. She checked her cell phone and saw that she had missed four calls from Hanna.

"What, doesn't she ever have class?" Emily mumbled out loud. Hanna was a freshman at a fashion school in New York. While the school was renowned, her schedule seemed to be... not very challenging, to say the least.

Hanna had left a very short voice message: "Call me back Fields, and _pronto_."

Sighing, Emily pressed the call back button. Hanna answered on the third ring.

"Em! Perfect timing! I'm having lunch outside, the weather is glorious here. Who needs sunny California?"

"Me, I guess," Emily answered. "It isn't too bad here either, by the way. But I suppose that you didn't call me to talk about the weather?"

"No, of course not Em. I just wanted to know how my best buddy was doing. You know, after..."

"After what?" Emily cut her short.

"Well, you know, after your... encounter with, um..." Hanna seemed to choose her words very carefully, which wasn't her at all.

"I see that you know," Emily said. "Spencer already spread the news. Of course."

"Em, it's not... I mean, she worries about you. We all do. Aria, Spencer and I."

"Why? Because I crossed paths with my ex? No biggie."

"Oh, come on Em. It's not a random ex. It's _Paige_ ," Hanna countered.

"Oh, so now you can say her name," Emily said wryly.

After the break-up, Hanna had taken Emily's side. She had cut all ties with the auburn girl, deleting her phone number from her contact list, and not wanting to hear anything about Paige McCullers anymore. What Emily didn't know was that Hanna had also sent several inflammatory emails to Paige.

"Emily," Hanna resumed. "Spencer said that you were really upset, so..."

"I'm okay, Hanna. Really," Emily said in a softer tone. She knew that Hanna cared about her, but she wasn't in the mood to start a deep conversation about her feelings - not on a Monday morning, not when she had Chemistry class in less than fifteen minutes.

"You sure? You know you can talk to me about anything, Em. Okay, maybe now is not the right time. You have class this morning, right?"

"Well, some of us do, yes," Emily smirked.

"Okay then, I'll let you go, but you know you can call me back anytime, right, Em? I'm here for you. I always will be."

"I know, Han," Emily said, feeling guilty for dismissing Hanna's concerns. "And I appreciate that, Hanna. I really do. But I'm fine. I even went out last night."

"Oooh really?" Hanna asked, excited all of a sudden. "Where did you go

"Well, there was this party, at a frat house..."

"Wow, Em. That's my girl. And did you have fun? Did you meet some cool people?"

"If by people, you mean some girls, well yes, I did," Emily answered. "Well, technnically, I mostly connected with one girl. If you see what I mean."

"...Wow, Em," Hanna said again, after a few seconds of silence.

On the other end of the line, Emily snorted.

"Oh, come on, Han. You, of all people are not going to lecture me. I just wanted to have fun." _And to forget what had happened yesterday morning._

"And did you? Have fun?"

"Yes."

"So... are you going to see this chick again?"

"Hanna, seriously? That was just... a one-night thing. I don't even know her name."

"You're kidding me?"

"Yes. I do know her name. But I don't plan to see her again. Period."

"Okay, Em. That's... great," Hanna said in the most enthusiastic tone she could muster at the moment. "I'm relieved to see that you're not depressed at all, Emily."

"Why should I be depressed? Listen Han, I have to go now. My next class is starting. Thank you for calling, and have a nice day yourself," Emily said curtly before hanging up.

* * *

On Thursday evening, exactly four days after her last encounter with Emily Fields, Paige McCullers came back to the Blue Bird Café. Thanks to Spencer, she knew that Emily was working that night, and she had followed her friend's advice - she had given Emily a few days to cool off. At least that was what she hoped. She didn't know what to expect from her former girlfriend, but she was hoping they would be able to talk, without yelling at each other or running away.

When she entered the café, she scanned the room, but Emily was nowhere in sight. The only employees were a boy that Paige hadn't seen before and the blonde waitress who had been there the last time. Sighing, Paige took a seat in a booth, in a quiet corner. She was feeling more and more nervous, and she quickly wiped her sweaty palms against her jeans.

She was rehearsing in her head what she wanted to tell Emily, something she had prepared over the past days, but now her words seemed dull and meaningless. _What can I say? I messed up, I alone am responsible for what happened between us, but if only you could forgive me, I really want us to be friends again, maybe even more? I mean later, of course. Just not right now._

"Okay," Paige said between her teeth. "This is so lame."

"Excuse me?"

Startled, Paige looked up to find the blonde young waitress glaring at her.

"Is something wrong?" the girl asked in a defiant tone.

Paige gulped.

"Um, no," she said sheepishly. "I was just thinking out loud. I'm sorry."

"You were there last Sunday, right?" the girl said. "With those Stanford students. You're the one who left suddenly."

"Yes," Paige said. "And about that..."

"You're the reason that Emily was so upset," the girl cut her off, frowning.

"Um, excuse me?" Paige said, her voice a little louder. "It's none of your business. It's... personal. And are you going to take my order, or not?"

The young waitress seemed to hesitate between snapping back at Paige and doing her job. With a shrug, she took a little notebook out of the pocket of her apron.

"So, what do you want, _Miss Stanford_?" she said, emphasizing the two last words.

 _What an obnoxious girl. But stay focus, McCullers. You're here for a reason._

"I'll have a latte."

"We don't have latte," the girl said curtly.

"Okay then, let's go for a cappuccino."

"We don't do cappuccino."

Paige raised a brow. "Really? Okay, black coffee then."

"We don't have coffee at this time of night."

"Seriously?" Paige almost yelled.

The waitress, who was wearing a smug grin, opened her mouth to answer, but was interrupted by a calm voice behind her.

"It's okay, Rebecca. I've got this."

Emily Fields was standing behind her colleague, beautiful as ever, even in the loose red t-shirt that seemed to be the café's uniform. Even with the stern expression on her face.

Rebecca shrugged, turned on her heel and left, but not without giving Emily a knowing look.

"I'm sorry," Paige said, dipping her head under Emily's stare. "It's just that..."

"Why are you here, Paige?"

Paige looked up at Emily. _Where to begin._

"Did you want to see me?" Emily asked, her tone even.

"Yes. I was hoping we could talk," Paige said in a hoarse voice.

"I'm working right now."

"I know. I know. But we can't stay... I mean, last Sunday. It was awful."

"What did you expect?"

"I... I don't know, Em. Sorry, I mean Emily. I wasn't expecting to see you the other day, I swear." _Shit. That came out wrong._

Against all odds, Emily let out a small laugh. "Yeah, me neither. Obviously."

She took a seat facing Paige.

"I don't really have time to talk, Paige."

"I know," Paige said again. "And I know that you told me to not come back."

"Still, you came back."

"Yeah," Paige said with a sheepish smile.

"I'm still mad at you."

"I know."

"Really, really mad."

"I know! I know, Emily," Paige pleaded. "And I want to apologize."

Emily shook her head and sighed. "Don't you get it? I don't want apologies. We're done."

Paige felt her heart felt her heart tighten as tears began to well up in her eyes.

Somehow, Emily's calm tone was worse than her fury from a few days ago.

Her message was clear. She wanted nothing to do with Paige, and this time, it wasn't the anger talking.

Paige tried to keep her voice steady while asking: "So, you don't think we can be... friends again?"

"Oh, come on, Paige," Emily said, rolling her eyes. "Are you serious?"

Paige didn't answer, looking away instead, in an attempt to hide the impeding tears.

"We used to be so good... together..." she finally said in a shaky voice. "You can't deny that, Emily."

Emily's poker face seemed to falter a bit for the first time since the beginning of their conversation. She cleared her throat and said: "The past is the past. We can't go back to what we were."

"I know," Paige said miserably.

The two girls remained silent for a moment, and then Emily said, in a softer voice: "I really have to get back to work."

"Yeah, okay..."

"Do you want to order something, Paige?"

Paige looked at Emily in disbelief. "No, I don't. I'd better go."

"Whatever you want to do," Emily said with a shrug. She stood up and tightened her apron strings. "Bye, Paige."

And that was it. She turned around and headed to the kitchen. Paige stared at Emily's back, fighting tears. She took a minute to compose herself, and then grabbed her jacket and stormed out the café.

One thing was sure: she wasn't going to go back there.

* * *

Emily was in the kitchen, staring blankly at the stove, when she heard Rebecca enter the room. Her blonde friend put a sympathetic hand on her shoulder.

"Hey Em, is everything okay?"

"Yeah," Emily mumbled.

Rebecca hesitated for a moment, and then asked:

"Is that her?"

"Yeah."

"I don't know the whole story, just what you told me, but... it seems complicated."

"It isn't," Emily said firmly.

"Really?" Rebecca asked, surprised.

"It's very simple. We were together, and we're not anymore. The typical story."

"Uh-huh," Rebecca said, seeming skeptical. "If you say so. Still, you seem..." she stopped mid-sentence, biting her lip.

Emily turned around suddenly, to face her colleague.

"What?" she asked defiantly.

Rebecca rolled her eyes. "Gee, Fields. Chill. It's nothing."

"No, it's not. What were you going to say, Rebecca?"

"Do you really want to know?"

"Well, yes."

"Okay then... well, it's just that... if it's so simple, and if you're really over her, why are you still so angry, and so sad, Emily?"


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Guys, I'm gonna make it short this time. I just want to say thank you to all the readers (a big kudos to the reviewers, of course!), and a BIG thank you to my awesome betareader, _siophiefandom._**

* * *

 _ **San Francisco, California. One month later.**_

Emily Fields felt euphoric. Everything had gone so well. Beyond well, actually. The meet had been a complete success for the Berkeley swim team. Against all odds, the Stanford varsity, which was supposed to be one of the best college teams in California, had been outclassed by their Bay Area peers.

The raven-haired girl was still feeling the adrenaline rush from her last race as she picked up her phone and dialed Spencer's number.

"...Spence?" she said in an excited tone as soon as she heard her friend's voice. "Guess what!"

"Um, hi, Em. How... how was the meet against Stanford?" Spencer's voice was unusually unsure, but it was lost on Emily, who was on cloud nine after the win.

"It was fantastic. Dude, we _so_ crushed them. You wouldn't believe it. And I felt so great. Asif I wasn't swimming, I was _flying_ , you know, and... Spencer?"

She stopped when she realized Spencer wasn't saying anything.

"Spencer? Is this a bad time? I can call you back if you want."

"...No, it's okay, Emily. I'm happy for you," Spencer answered. "It's just... never mind."

"What, Spencer?" Emily asked, frowning. "Is it about _her_? Because you know what? Paige wasn't even there. She didn't swim, Spencer! She didn't even have the guts to show up."

She heard Spencer sigh deeply. "Emily..."

"What?" Emily answered in a defensive tone. "I'm just stating the obvious, Spencer."

"Emily, do you know why Paige wasn't there today?"

"Well, not really, but a girl on the Stanford team said it was some personal family matter. I guess she chickened out, that's all. I'd never thought she'd be a coward, but..."

"Emily," Spencer cut her off sharply. "You're so wrong. And I'm really sorry to break you out of your little bubble of felicity, and there's no easy way to say it, so I'm just gonna say it. Paige missed the meet, because she is mourning."

"She is... what?"

"She lost someone," Spencer said in a softer tone. "Emily, Paige's mother died two days ago."

At the other end of the line, Emily closed her eyes and tightened her grip on the phone. Gone were the joy and the pride. She just felt numb now.

"I... no, no, I... I can't believe... how?" she stammered.

"Well, it was sudden. And unexpected. Mrs. McCullers was grocery shopping, and she suddenly felt weak, and... well, I don't know much. The people in the store called Emergency Services, but by the time they got there, she was already gone. The doctors seem to think it was a brain aneurism or something like that. They're not sure yet."

"Oh god Spencer, that's so awful," Emily said with a sob. "How... how is Paige?"

"Well, as you can imagine, she's... she's pretty shocked," Spencer answered. "She's with her family right now, mainly her dad. Now you know why she wasn't there today with her team," the younger Hastings added.

"I'm such a bitch," Emily whispered in a shaky voice. "I was just gossiping about Paige's absence, and..."

"You didn't know, Emily."

"Still. I feel so bad."

Jennifer McCullers was gone. Paige's mother. Her wonderful, warm and perky mother. Emily's mind wandered to the day she first met Jenn McCullers.

* * *

 _Eight months earlier - Oakland, California._

The ride from the airport in Oakland had been rather quick, much to Emily's surprise. "We don't live far from the airport," Paige explained while helping her uncle with Emily's luggage. "We often have planes just over our heads, literally. But it's not really a problem, as you'll see. We get used to it."

Emily looked around her. The neighborhood seemed pleasant, though the houses were much smaller and closer to each other than in her own hometown, Rosewood. Tim had parked his car just in front of a yellow two-story house. The paint on the facade looked a little worn out, but there were beautiful flower pots on the porch, and a perfectly well-kept little garden in the front, Emily noticed.

Paige followed Emily's glance and smiled proudly. "My mother loves her gardening."

With perfect timing, the front door opened, revealing a woman in her early forties, with auburn hair and a broad smile.

"There you are!" the woman exclaimed while rushing to the car. She stopped right in front of Emily. "It's so great to meet you finally, Emily!" she said before hugging the taller girl in a tight grip. She was surprisingly strong for such a petite woman - she was definitely smaller than her daughter.

Out of the corner of her eye, Emily saw Paige giggling.

"Mom! Let Emily breathe, please! She's not used to your PDA yet."

Paige's mother released her grip on Emily, but left her hands on the raven-haired girl's shoulders before taking a step backward and staring at her.

"You're really gorgeous, Emily! Even prettier than in the pictures! Paigey wasn't lying."

"Mom!" Paige whined. "Don't Paigey me in front of my girlfriend. And don't embarrass Emily, please."

A blushing Emily smiled at these words. _Girlfriend_. _Well, I guess at least her mother knows where we stand._

The woman in front of her raised her hands in a mocking surrender.

"Okay, okay. I will try to behave. But you have to know, Emily, that I'm a very effusive woman."

"I don't mind, Mrs. McCullers, " Emily said politely. "And thank you, by the way, for having me in your home."

"You're welcome, sweetie. And please, it's Jennifer, not Mrs. McCullers. Almost everybody calls me Jennifer, or Jenn, even this one, sometimes," she said, motioning towards her daughter. "Especially when she wants to get on my nerves."

Paige rolled her eyes. "Oh come on, _Jenn_. That never happens."

"Don't listen to her, Emily. Now, you must be exhausted! Let's get inside. You're coming in, Tim?" she asked her brother. "I have cold beer for you, and lemonade for the girls."

"I will never say no to cold beer, Sis," the young man answered.

A few minutes later, everyone was enjoying drinks in the living room. The room was rather small, but cozy, and Emily felt immediately at ease. She was sitting on an old but comfy couch, with Paige by her side, their legs brushing slightly, their hands linked. The California girl had taken Emily's hand in her own as soon as they sat, and neither Paige's mother nor her uncle had seemed to mind.

Jennifer McCullers was asking Emily about her flight, and while answering, Emily couldn't help but study the other woman's face. The resemblance between Paige and her mother was striking. They shared the same features, especially the button nose and the full lips. Their eyes were different though. Paige had big brown eyes, whereas Jennifer had green, almond-shaped eyes, like her brother Tim.

Emily also noticed that Paige's mother seemed rather young, much younger than her own parents. _She must have had Paige when she was really young._

As much as she was enjoying meeting Paige's family - minus her father, who was nowhere to be seen - Emily was beginning to feel tired. She hadn't slept well the night before, with all the excitement due to her upcoming trip.

And she was really looking for some time alone with Paige. _I_ _can't wait to kiss her. Wait, are we even allowed to do that in the house? Will her mother mind? She seems really cool, but..._

"Well Paige, why don't you show Emily her room now?" Jenn McCullers' cheery voice interrupted Emily's thoughts. "And show her the whole house, by the way. Not that it is really big, as you'll see, Emily. But you'll have your own place, don't worry. Paige here is going to sleep in the attic."

Paige stuck her tongue at her mother, and then winked at Emily, who was staring at her, startled. _So, we we're not going to sleep in the same room? And is she really going to stay in the attic, or are they kidding?_

Emily had hoped that she and Paige would share a room, as they had in Rosewood. She knew they couldn't sleep in the same bed, not with Paige's parents in the house, but she had pictured them talking all night in the dark, and cuddling, of course.

She followed Paige out of the living room, and before they got to the stairs, she whispered to the auburn girl: "Wait, are you really going to sleep in the attic? What about your room?"

Paige shrugged. "You're getting it."

"Oh no Paige, I don't want to take your room."

Paige smiled fondly, and brushed Emily's cheek with her fingers.

"It's okay Em. I love to sleep in the attic, seriously. It's not a real attic by the way, more of an extra room. My dad sometimes uses it as a home office, and there's a perfectly good couch. And a TV, and a DVD player."

"But why can't we share your room?" Emily pouted.

"Well, first because, as you'll see, it's a very small room, and there is only enough space for one bed. And second, because my father doesn't want us to sleep in the same room."

"Oh," Emily said, disappointed.

Paige smirked. "Yes, my dad is rather old-fashioned, unlike my mom. But don't worry Em, we'll find ways," she added.

"Ways for what?" Emily asked with a half-smile.

Paige waited until they reached the top of the stairs, and then pushed Emily against the wall, before crushing their lips in a long-awaited, passionate kiss.

Then she leaned back, leaving Emily breathless.

"For that," Paige said simply, grinning.

* * *

 _ **Present day - Oakland, California**_

 _ **Jennifer McCullers' funeral**_

The teenage girl was standing by her father, surrounded by people dressed in black or somber colors. Relatives, friends, and also strangers. Family she barely knew, and colleagues of her mother she had never met or even heard about. Everyone looked sorry and sad, and some were even crying. She wasn't.

She had cried her eyes out in the past few days, but only when she was alone in her room. In front of her father, and even her uncle (her mother's beloved brother), she had remained strong.

Her eyes were focused on the coffin in front of her. It was hard -no, it was unbearable- to admit that her mother's body was inside. A small part of Paige (the little kid in her) was still hoping that it hadn't happened, and that her mother would appear behind her and hug her, whispering soothing words in her ear. " _Everything's gonna be okay, Paigey."_ She would give anything to hear the dreaded nickname from her mother's lips again.

She was lost in her sadness and her pain, so she didn't see the raven-haired girl who was staring at her from a safe distance, half hidden by some trees.

From where she was standing, Emily could not see Paige closely, but she could tell that the girl was even paler than usual, and thinner than she remembered.

Emily felt sad and conflicted, torn between her feelings and the voice of reason - her heart told her to run to Paige and take the auburn girl in her arms, but her mind knew better. She couldn't do that, not right then, not anymore - and especially not after what had happened between them.

This wasn't about their bad breakup; well, not only. It was what had happened after - Emily refusing to talk to Paige, and lashing out at her when the Californian girl had tried to apologize. _I'm sure she doesn't want me here. I probably shouldn't be here._

Emily stayed apart fromthe group throughout the whole ceremony. She watched Paige, followed by her father and her uncle Tim, throw dirt on the casket.

Emily felt her heart sank when the auburn girl finally collapsed in Nick McCullers' arms.

She wiped her tears when she heard Paige's strangled sobs.

 _Oh god, Paige. I'm so, so sorry._

Long after everyone left, Emily walked to the fresh grave and stood there, looking sadly at the inscription on the tombstone.

" _Jennifer Finlay-McCullers, 1969-_ 2014\. _Beloved wife and mother_." The gold letters were shining in the receding sun.

It was a sharp contrast to the next grave, a smaller one, which housed a child. The inscription there was already a little faded, though the child's death had happened only a few years before.

Emily knew whose grave it was. Her heart heavy as she read the epitaph: " _Ryan Nicholas McCullers, 1999-2005_."

That was all it said, but the small grave was covered by fresh flowers, and there was also a small toy on it: a teddy bear with a red bow. Given the toy looked brand new, Emily thought that it had probably been left there by Paige or her father during Jenn's funeral.

"Ryan..." Emily whispered. Of course, she had never met Paige's little brother. But she knew the whole, sad story - and she could only imagine how hard it was for Paige and Nick McCullers to lose another loved one.

* * *

 _ **Oakland, California. Eight months earlier.**_

"Oh, I'm sorry, Mrs. McCullers. I didn't know... that someone was in here," Emily apologized, taking a step back from the living room. Jennifer McCullers raised her head, and smiled gently at the raven-haired girl.

"It's fine Emily, come on in sweetie. I could use some company. And by the way, I told you, it's Jenn, not Mrs. McCullers."

"Thank you Mrs... I mean Jenn."

"Take a seat, Emily. I was just going through some old pictures."

She motioned to the photographs on display on top of the coffee table.

"I used to keep my photos albums updated, but I guess I've been too busy lately to do it properly," Paige's mother with a sigh. "And I can't really count on Paige or Nick for that kind of thing."

Emily smiled at the older woman. "Well, my mom would probably say the same thing. She's the one in charge of that kind of stuff. She even does scrapbooking, you know?"

"Oh, really? I've never tried that. You mother must be a very creative woman."

"Oh, I don't know about that. It's just a hobby for her, I think. But I must admit, she does really nice things."

"I'm sure she does," Jennifer McCullers said with a warm smile.

She looked at Emily, whose eyes were fixed on one of the many photographs spread out across the table. It was a picture of Paige at a young age, with messy hair and a bright smile. The little girl was clutching a rag doll to her chest.

"Oh, I love this one," the older woman said. "Paige was only four then. She was such a joyful, happy kid," she added, and Emily couldn't help but notice the sudden hint of sadness in Jenn McCullers' voice. It was a trait that she had also seen in Paige. Her girlfriend was usually the outgoing, talkative kind, but sometimes, in an instant she could close in on herself as if there was a veil of sadness all over her.

She smiled at the other woman, not knowing what to say. But Jennifer McCullers was already back to her normal self, and smiled back warmly at Emily.

"You can have a look at these photos, you know? If you want to. Just don't tell Paige I showed you her baby pictures. She would be mad," she winked at the younger girl.

"Oh yes, I would love to have a look at them," Emily answered with a shy smile. She was curious about everything about her girlfriend - and Paige, not surprisingly, had been a gorgeous baby, and a very cute little girl.

Soon, Emily was beaming over Paige's class photos. There were also a lot of pictures of the swim team, mostly with the Oakland girls proudly holding some trophies. In several pictures, Emily recognized Shana, who always seemed to stand close to Paige, and was looking confident and smug as usual.

Jennifer McCullers explained to Emily that she was actually making a photo album about Paige's high school years.

"You know, I wanted to do it before, but I never took the time; And I realized it's Paige's senior year, in a few months she'll be gone to college, so it's about time I did it."

Emily nodded and smiled at the older woman. She helped Paige's mother sort and select photos for her album, stopping only when she found a picture of a boy who looked exactly like a young, male version of Paige.

He had the same auburn hair and big brown eyes, and the same exact smile as Paige's.

"Oh my god, who is this?" Emily exclaimed. "Is he a young cousin? He so looks like Paige."

When Mrs. McCullers didn't answer immediately, Emily looked at her and was struck by the expression of sadness on the woman's face.

"...That was my son Ryan," Jennifer McCullers said after a while. "Paige's little brother. He died many years ago."

Emily opened her mouth, but no sound came out. _Oh god. Paige never told me about a brother. And a deceased brother..._

Mrs. McCullers was still looking at the little boy's picture, and Emily began to feel really uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry," Emily stammered. "I didn't mean to... I didn't know..."

Jennifer looked up at her. "It's okay, Emily," she said with a sad smile. "Paige... Paige never told you about Ryan?"

"No, she didn't," Emily confessed.

"It was so hard for her. For everyone, of course, but especially for her. They were very close. You know, he died when he was only six. Paige was ten then."

"What...what happened?" Emily asked, before adding quickly: "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. I don't want to intrude."

"It's okay, honey. You're not intruding. Ryan, it was... an accident, a stupid and tragic accident. I can't..." she closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"Even now, nine years after, it's very difficult to talk about it."

"I'm sorry, Mrs. McCullers. Jenn. I'm so sorry," Emily said.

The woman opened her eyes and smiled sadly at the teenager. "You don't have to be sorry, Emily. I shouldn't bother you with my family drama."

"You're nit..." Emily protested. "It's just... I can only imagine how hard it is to lose a child. I feel so sorry for you, and for Mr. McCullers, and for Paige, of course."

She recalled some conversations she had shared with Paige in Rosewood. About being an only child, and about how she (Emily) had always wanted to have some siblings. Paige had never mentioned a deceased brother back then, not even once.

"Nick changed completely, after that," Jennifer McCullers said, staring into space.

"He was such a loving and proud father. But when it happened... when we lost Ryan... well, he couldn't help blaming himself. He felt that he hadn't been able to protect his son, you know? But if I learned something, it's that we can't always protect our children. We can love them and take care of them, but we can't protect them from everything. It's sad but true, Emily."

Emily just nodded, her heart heavy. She had no idea Paige's family had been through so much.

"How... how did Paige react?" she asked in a small voice.

Jennifer McCullers let out a deep sigh.

"Oh, my little Paigey... it was so hard for her. She really loved her brother. I remember she cried for a week. She was inconsolable. She didn't want to get out of her bed. And then, one day, when she came out of her room, she wasn't crying anymore. And she went right to her father, and she told him out of the blue: 'I want to learn how to swim. And I want to become the best swimmer ever. Would you help me? ' Nick and I were both stunned. You know, Ryan drowned. In the neighbor's pool. Neither of my children knew how to swim."

* * *

 **A/N: I know, I know. This is sad. Please don't hate me for this. Happier times will come... just remember that I love Paily, and by the way: I love you all.**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Guys, I'm so glad (and relieved!) that you -well, at least some of you - are still reading this fic. I know that chapter 4 was rather (not to say very...) sad. I will make it up to you, I promise.**

 **Special thank you to the reviewers! (and, Guest: thanks so much, and I love you too!)**

 **Big thank you, of course, to** _ **siophiefandom**_ **for the betareading, and for the constant support, especially when I'm struggling with my writing.**

* * *

 _ **Stanford University, California - Present day**_

Emily had been staring blankly at the door for way too long - the students passing by were beginning to glare at her, and she had even heard a few suscipious whispers. Gathering all her courage, she took a deep breath and knocked on the door. A few seconds later, the door opened. But the girl in front of her wasn't the one she was expecting.

"Yes?" the petite blonde asked quizically.

"Hi, um, is this... I mean, is this Paige McCullers' room?" Emily stammered.

"Not anymore," the blonde girl answered with a shrug. She looked Emily over from head to toe, her eyes softening only when she realized how distressed the girl in front of her looked.

"What... what do you mean, not anymore?" Emily asked, her heart hammering in her chest.

"She left, a couple of weeks ago," the girl said.

"She left... the dorms?"

"She left _Stanford_ ," the girl clarified.

"You... you mean, she quit college? For good?" Emily asked in a trembling voice.

 _Oh Paige, what did you do, and where are you?_

"Listen," the blonde girl said, her brows furrowed. "I don't know who you are, and I don't think I should..." she stopped suddenly, realization dawning on her. "Wait, you are... you're _her_ , right?"

"Um, what?"

"You're _Emily_ , right?"

"Well, yeah, um..." Emily said, feeling uneasy. She didn't know what Paige had shared (or not) with her roommate about their relationship, not to mention their breakup.

"Come on in!" the girl said.

Emily followed her inside. The room was remarkably similar to Emily's own room at Berkeley, with two beds, two desks and a few shelves here and there. But one bed had only a plain mattress on it, and the nearest desk was absolutely empty. No books, no laptop, not a single object on it. Their was no indication that Paige had ever lived in the room - not even a poster or a photograph on the walls.

As if she had guessed what Emily was thinking, the blonde girl said:

"She kept a picture of you. In her bedside table drawer, but she looked at it all the time. That's how I recognized you earlier."

Emily just nodded, fighting to hold back tears.

 _She kept a photo of me in next to her bed... After all thad happened between us._

She sat on the empty bed, clenching her arms around her body.

"Do you know... did Paige tell you why she left?" she asked the girl softly.

"You know, she was having a hard time. After her mother's death... wait, you know about that, don't you?"

"Yeah..." Emily said, her voice hoarse.

"Well, she kept saying that she was fine, that she could deal with... all this, but I know she was lying. She wasn't... herself anymore. I mean, she wasn't exactly a ray of sunshine before, but this was different. As if she was... broken, you know?" the girl said cautiously, studying Emily's reactions.

The tall raven-haired girl nodded again, a lump in her throat.

"And then... one morning, she told me that she was going back home. To Oakland. That her father needed her; that she had to be near him. I tried to talk to her about it - and I know a few professors did, too- because after all, she could stay here and go visit her dad on weekend. It's not as if he lives far away. But her decision was made. Paige, she can be really stubborn, you know that."

 _You bet I know._

"So...she's back home, right now?" Emily asked.

"Yep. As far as I know. You... want to reach to her? Do you have her address in Oakland?" the other girl asked.

"Yes. I know the place."

* * *

Emily took a deep breath and rang the doorbell of the McCullers house. Her heart was beating fast, and her palms were sweaty. She didn't know whether Paige was home at the moment - the auburn girl hadn't answered Emily's calls and texts. But according to Heather, Paige's roommate at Stanford, she was back home in Oakland. And Emily wanted to talk to her face to face.

After a couple of minutes, the front door opened, revealing a tired-looking Nick McCullers.

Emily took a step back. "Hello, Mr. McCullers," she stammered. Paige's father had always intimidated her a bit.

Nick McCullers gave her a tired smile. "Emily Fields," he said in his deep, low voice. "It's been a while."

"Yes, sir, I know, and I'm sorry," Emily stammered. "I mean, about your wife. I'm so, so sorry for your loss."

"Thank you, Emily."

"I mean it, I... it's so awful. I... Icouldn't believe it, when I heard..." Emily stuttered, fumbling with her words. _Damn, why is it so hard?_

"Yes, it was so sudden. I can't believe that Jennifer isn't here anymore, either, believe me," the older man said, the sadness obvious in his voice.

Emily dipped her head, not knowing how to answer.

"I guess you're here to see Paige?" the tall man asked.

"Well, yes, I was hoping... I mean, I'd really like to talk to her," Emily said. Her heart was hammering in her chest. _What if she doesn't want to see me anymore? I deserve it, I guess._

"Unfortunately, Paige isn't home right now," Nick McCullers said.

"Oh," Emily said, her heart sinking. "She isn't?"

"No. She's with her uncle, Tim. They are at the cabin. Jenn's cabin, in Lakeport. You know the place, right?"

"Yes," Emily answered, her throat tight.

 _The lake cabin. How could I forget? That amazing weekend with Paige, just the two of us. And... our first time._

She blushed, as if Nick McCullers could guess what she was thinking. The man raised a brow, but didn't push the subject.

After a moment of silence, Paige's father asked:

"Well, do you want to come in, Emily?"

"Oh no, sir, thank you, but no. I don't want to bother you."

"You're not bothering me. It's nice to see a friendly face."

"Still, I should go..." Emily said with a apologetic smile. "Could you just tell Paige I stopped by, please?"

"Of course, Emily. I'm certain she will be happy you did."

Emily dipped her head. "I'm not sure about that, sir..." she whispered.

"Listen, Emily," the oder man said in a firmer voice. "I don't know exactly what happened between you two, but I can tell you still care about my daughter."

"...I do, sir," Emily said after a while.

"And Paige, it's not as if she confides in me, but... I know my daughter. She doesn't give her trust, not to mention her love, very easily."

Emily just nodded. _Oh_ _I know, and that's also why it hurt so much_.

"...And I know my wife loved you, too. She always spoke so highly of you," Nick McCullers said.

"Really?" Emily asked, but she wasn't really surprised. Jennifer McCullers was such a lovely person. She always looked for the best in people.

* * *

Emily didn't go right back to Berkeley after her brief encounter with Nick McCullers. She took a walk around the neighborhood, recalling the moments she had spent there with Paige, places where they had gone together, like the small public square just behind Paige's street. It was only a few months earlier; still it seemed so long ago. _So much has changed since then. We broke up. And now Paige's mom is dead. God, I still can't believe it._

Emily reached the small park and sat on one of the swings. She had spent a lot of time there with Paige during her stay in Oakland, talking for hours about the future. Their future.

Emily took a stick and began drawing letters on the ground. She had already traced a P and a A, and was starting to draw the I when she heard someone coughing. Startled, she look up and saw a boy, in his early teens, who was staring at her with bright, curious eyes.

"Hey," she said.

"You're Emily, right?" the boy asked, much to Emily's surprise.

"Um, yeah? Have we met before?"

"You don't remember me?" the boy asked, sounding disappointed.

"No, I'm sorry but... do I know you?"

"I'm Darryl. Paige's neighbor. I live right in front of the McCullerses."

"Oh yeah, Darryl! I remember you now! You're Alex's little brother, right?" Emily exclaimed. Alex was a hot-headed girl, with a sharp tongue, and wasn't really one of Paige's friends, though the two girls have never been enemies.

But Emily remembered all too well the comment Alex made to Paige when she met Emily for the first time: _'Wow, nice catch, McCullers. That girl is way out of your league.'_ It was obviously said to provoke a reaction from Paige, but the auburn girl had just shrugged and said quietly: _'I understand you're jealous, Alex. I would be, too.'_

And right after that, Paige had kissed Emily's cheek tenderly.

The boy seemed to be nicer than his sister, though. He sat on the swing near Emily's, and looked at the letters on the ground.

"Were you writing down her name?" he asked, smiling.

"No," Emily said, blushing. "...Well, yes."

"Do you miss her?" the boy asked bluntly.

Emily raised a brow, surprised. _Did she tell everyone about our breakup, or what?_

"I miss her too," the boy added. "Since she left for college. She used to help me with my homework, you know? My sister never does that."

"She did?" Emily asked.

"Yeah, she did, and Paige explains things very well, you know. Much better than my teachers. She even makes math fun sometimes!" the boy exclaimed.

Emily nodded with a half-smile. "I'm not surprised."

"Do you know what happened?" the boy asked. "To her mother, I mean?"

"Um, yeah. I know. That's why I'm here, actually."

"She was a very nice woman. Paige's mom." the boy said with a sigh.

"Yeah, she was," Emily confirmed.

"And now Paige's all sad and in pain."

"I know," Emily said sadly. "I wish I could help her."

"But you can. If you really want to," Darryl said confidently.

Emily stared at the boy, not knowing how to answer without explaining everything.

"...It's complicated, you know. We're not together anymore," she ventured.

"Yeah, I figured. You girls are so complicated. But you still care for her, right?"

"I..." Emily began, before stopping. _Damn. Why does everyone keep saying that?And why is this damned kid so perceptive?_

 _"_...It's complicated," she said again.

* * *

 _ **Two weeks later - San Francisco**_

It was better to see each other again in neutral territory, so they both agreed to meet in a café located in downtown San Francisco. It was on a busy street near Union Square, and Emily, who had gotten there first, had chosen a table by the window.

She was sipping her Americano, mentally rehearsing what she wanted to say to Paige. She was nervous, of course, and rather anxious to see how her ex was _really_ doing. It had only been five weeks since the funeral and even though Emily didn't know much about the mourning process, she had no doubt Paige was facing the worst time of her life.

Paige was a little late and Emily couldn't help checking her cell phone every minute or so. She had one fear - Paige cancelling their meeting, backing out at the last minute. It would've been understandable, given the circumstances. But Emily didn't know whether of not she would have been able to stand it.

Paige entered the café ten minutes late, looked around, and then headed to Emily's table. Emily stood up and studied her ex-girfriend's appearance, noticing the dark circles under Paige's eyes and the pallor of her skin.

"Hi. Sorry, I'm late," Paige said in a low voice.

"It's okay, I just got here", Emily answered, even though it wasn't true.

The girls sat, and an uneasy silence fell over the table.

"Do you, um, want something to drink?" Emily asked in a polite tone. "Coffee maybe? And...something to eat?" _You seem thiner_ , she thought. _Almost as if you haven't eaten in weeks._

"I'm not hungry, and I should probably avoid coffee," Paige said. "You know, my insomnia problem is back. So... maybe herbal tea? Do you think they have some?"

"I don't know, probably..." Emily said, motioning to the waitress. "I'm sorry, about the insomnia," she added awkwardly, glancing at Paige. _And about so many things, too_.

Paige shrugged and dipped her head. "It's okay. I'm used to it."

"What about your headaches?"

"They're back, too. I deal with it."

"It's not... so surprising, considering the circumstances," Emily ventured. Paige looked up and stared at her.

"No, I suppose it's not," she simply said.

"I'm so..." Emily began, before being interrupted by the waitress, who took Paige's order. When the woman left, Emily leaned forward and took Paige's hand in hers. She felt the other girl stiffen, but she didn't let go of her hand.

"Paige," she said. "I don't how to say this, but... I just want you to know that I'm here for you. And I mean it. I know things... have been beyond difficult between us. But I... I do care for you. I never stopped. Even when I was... mad at you," she added, lowering her eyes.

Paige just nodded. She squezzed Emily's hand gently.

"That's good to know," she said after a while, offering a small smile. Emily looked back at her.

"Were you doubting that?" she asked.

"I don't know... maybe. You had every right to be mad at me. To hate me, even."

"I don't... I never..." Emily protested. "Paige, I never hated you," she continued, before realizing she had actually said some very harsh words to Paige when they broke up.

"I didn't mean it," she said in an apologetic voice. "Paige, I didn't mean it. When I told you to go to hell."

"It's okay, Emily. You don't have to apologize. I'm not here for that."

The waitress came back to their table, bringing Paige's herbal tea and a muffin Emily had ordered, intending to make Paige eat it.

"...I just want to know how you're doing," Emily said in a low voice. "How you're _really_ doing."

Paige's answer was disarmingly blunt. "It's hell, Em," she said softly, and Emily's heart broke at the words.

"Oh, Paige," she said, feeling tears welling up in her eyes.

Paige sniffled, dipping her head and shrugging.

"Well, yeah... it's worse for my dad, I guess."

"I heard you dropped out of college to be with him..."

"No, I mean yes, but... I didn't drop out of college, Emily, I just... took a break from school. From everything, actually."

"I understand."

"Emily, I... I need to leave."

"Al..already?" Emily stammered, not hiding her disappointment. "But you just got here!"

"No, I mean... I need to leave, I mean I'm gonna leave California soon."

"But your dad..."

"Well, you know, my dad doesn't want to stay in Oakland anymore. Too many memories. He's going back to Nebraska."

Emily remembered Nick McCullers proudly saying that he was a 'Nebraskan, born and raised'; Paige's paternal family was still stettled there.

"Really? And what are you going to do then?" Emily asked, concerned. "Wait... are you going to Nebraska with him?"

Paige shook her head.

"Where are you going to stay then? If you don't have the house anymore..." Emily said, frowning.

"Oh, we're keeping the house. For now. My uncle, Tim, will take care of it."

"Okay, but... what about you?" Emily asked, feeling more and more confused.

Paige took a deep breath.

"Emily, I... I've decided to travel abroad for a while."

Emily frowned. "Travel? You're going to travel?"

"Yes, I know it might sound weird, and selfish, but I really need... I need to get away, Emily. I can't... it's as if I can't breath anymore around here," Paige said, closing her eyes. "I don't know how to explain it."

"You don't have to."

The girls remained silent for a while, before Paige spoke again.

"I'm going to Europe."

"Really?" Emily asked, surprised.

"Yeah. I've always wanted to go there."

"Really? I didn't know." _As a matter of fact, there are a lot of things I don't know about you, come to think of it._

"Yes. I really feel the need to see... other countries, other people. I talked to my dad, and... well, he agreed," Paige shrugged. "So I'm flying to England first. And after that, I'd like to go to Ireland, you see... maybe meet my mom's family... I know she still has cousins near Cork..."

Emily nodded. She remembered that Jennifer McCullers was of Irish descent. Maybe it would be a good idea for Paige to meet that side of the family. Maybe it could ease her pain - at least a little.

"And then," Paige continued, "If I have enough money left, I'd like to go to France. And maybe Spain. Or Italy."

"So... you're going to be away for a while?" Emily asked, dreading the answer.

"I don't know, probably a few months..." Paige said.

"And... when are you leaving?"

"Soon. Next week. I've already booked my flight to London," Paige answered, studying Emily's reaction.

Emily dropped her gaze. "Oh... okay," she sighed.

"Emily..."

"No, I mean, it's really fine, Paige. If you feel that you have to do it... that you need this... then, just do it."

"You mean it?"

"Yes, I do."

"I'm so glad you understand."

Emily wanted to tell Paige to stay – that they had just started to rekindle their relationship, maybe just as friends, but it was still something, wasn't it?  
But she knew deep down that she needed to let Paige go. For now.

So she assured her ex-girlfriend that she understood, and that she wished her all the best for her trip to Europe. She made Paige promise to keep in touch with her, even if it was only with a postcard or a text message from time to time.

Paige agreed, and they hugged. Their hug was a little awkward, but sincere. It was their first physical contact since their breakup at swim camp the summer before. Emily tried to act casual, but her heart was beating fast. She didn't know that Paige's heart was racing even faster.

* * *

 **A/N: I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter. Babysteps... for now. Better time will come for Paige and Em. Love, subway20.**


	6. Chapter 6 -What happened at swim camp

**A/N: Well, in case you guys are wondering what happened between Emily and Paige a few months ago (I would, if I were you), this chapter is a flashback about what happened at swim camp.**

 **Thank you to every reader/reviewer (each review is a boost and really helps me to keep on writing), and of course, a special thank you to my awesome betareader _siophiefandom_ !**

* * *

 _ **Swim camp - Wilsonville, North Carolina.**_

 _ **5 months earlier**_

"Are you sure you don't want me to help you with that, Emmy?" Wayne Fields asked his daughter, who was taking out her bags from his green Chevrolet.

Emily smiled at her father. "It's fine dad, thanks. You know, I'm a big girl now. I can carry my own bags."

"I know, Hon. You're so tall now, and strong, and beautiful. But you're still my little girl."

"Come on dad, you're beginning to sound like mom!" Emily teased.

Her father rolled his eyes and closed the trunk. "And I guess you don't want me to come with you to the registration desk, either."

"Really dad, it's okay. It's only a technicality. And Paige already explained everything about the camp in her last e-mail."

"Speaking of Paige... where is she? I thought she would be waiting for you in the parking lot, like a lost puppy," Wayne said with a wink.

Emily tried to look offended, but she couldn't help giggling. "I'm gonna tell her you said that, you know," she said.

"Please do! Seriously Emmy, don't you want to call her now? I'd really love to meet her in person. Facetime and Skype are great, but I'm beginning to think she's a hologram," Wayne teased.

Emily rolled her eyes, feigning annoyance. "Fine, I'm gonna call her," she said, grabbing her phone from her purse."Oh," she said. "She texted me. How come I didn't hear?" she mumbled.

Emily looked at the message and frowned slightly.

"Everything okay, Emmy?" Wayne Fields asked, his eyes scrutinizing his daughter. He knew that little wrinkle on Emily's forehead all too well.

"...It's fine," Emily said after a while. "Paige just texted me that she can't meet us here. She's at practise right now, and the coaches here are really strict. She told me to go to the registration desk. They're waiting for me. We'll meet later."

Emily had tried to sound chirpy, but her dad wasn't fooled. He put a soothing hand on his daughter's shoulder.

"That's understandable, Emily. This kind of swim camp is really demanding. But it's what you wanted, right?"

Emily smiled bravely at her father. "Yes, of course. I'm here to improve my swimming skills, and to impress the scouts."

"And to be with Paige, of course," his father added with a teasing smile.

Emily blushed. "That, too," she confessed.

"Of course Hon. And I'm sure you two are going to have the time of your life here. And that college scholarship will follow automatically, don't worry for that. Every college is going to want you," Wayne said, his eyes shining with pride.

Emily smiled fondly at her dad. "Sure, and you're not biased at all."

"I'm just stating the obvious, Emmy. Seriously, have fun. Work hard, but play harder!" he joked.

* * *

Ten minutes later, Emily was at the registration desk. She handed her voucher to a young woman dressed in the green and white uniform of the swim camp.

The woman checked her computer and said: "Emily Fields. You've been assigned to 'Jenny Thomson'."

"Excuse me?" Emily said.

The young employee glared at her. "It's the name of your cabin," she explained. "Every cabin is named after a famous female swimmer. You will be bunking with three other girls, by the way. We have smaller cabins, with two bunks, but they were already taken."

"Oh, okay," Emily said, trying to hide her disappointment _. It would have been awesome to share a cabin with Paige. Our own little haven... But as soon as we're in the same cabin, even if we have to share it with other girls, it will be fine._

The young woman handed Emily a key. "This is the key to your cabin. Don't lose it. And this is a map of the camp. Your cabin is located near the lake. Do you need some help finding it?" she asked in a bored voice.

"Um, no, I think I can handle that," Emily answered politely. "Thank you very much."

She exited the bungalow and looked around her. It was a beautiful place, with a lot of space. It seemed bigger than it did on the website and in the brochures Emily had looked at. Some cabins were close to the entrance, but others seemed to be hidden behind the trees. Emily looked at the map and took the road along the lake. A few minutes later, she was standing in front of the 'Jenny Thomson' cabin.

Although she was pretty sure that the place was empty (the other campers being at practise), she knocked at the door. She was surprised to hear an "It's open!" from inside, and she opened the door and stepped in.

The room was rather small, but there was enough space for four bunk beds, and two small cupboards. A girl with curly black hair was sitting cross-legged on one of the beds.

"Hi," she said in a raspy voice. "You must be Emily."

"Yes, I'm Emily Fields. Nice to meet you," Emily said, her eyes scanning the room, looking for some clues that it was actually Paige's cabin too. But she didn't recognize any of the belongings that she could see in the room.

"I'm Michelle," the other girl said. "It's nice to meet you too. How come you got here so late? Camp started yesterday," she observed.

Emily smiled apologetically. "Well, my dad drove me here, so it took a while. More than we expected. I live in Pennsylvania," she explained.

"Oh really?" Michelle said. "We have another girl from Pennsylvania here. Paige. She's very talented, from what I heard."

Emily beamed at the name, and at the comment. "Yeah, I know, we're... I mean, we know each other. Is she staying in this cabin too?" she asked hopefully.

Michelle shook her head. "Paige? No, she's staying in another cabin. On the other side of the camp, actually."

"Oh," Emily said, trying to hide her disappointment. "I was hoping that... never mind."

She smiled at the girl, though her heart was heavy.

 _Paige assured me that she'd do her best to get us in the same cabin. I guess it wasn't possible after all..._

"You can have that bed," Michelle said, pointing out the only bed that wasn't covered by clothes and magazines. "And the cupboards are already rather full, but..."

"It's okay," Emily assured her. "I'll manage."

Once Emily was settled, she texted Paige to tell her that she was there, and that she was looking forward to seeing her before dinner. She didn't get any response. She was beginning to feel worried, and a little angry. She knew that practise was over, because the other girls who were sharing the cabin had come back. They seemed to be nice girls, from what Emily could see, though a little chatty.

Emily followed her roommates to the dinner hall that was located at the center of the camp. She was checking her phone one more time when she heard hurried footsteps behind her.

"Emily!" an out-of-breath Paige exclaimed.

Emily turned around, a big smile on her face.

"Paige! At last! I've been calling and texting you non-stop since I got here."

"I know! I know, but I was at practise, and then my phone died, and then... I'm really sorry, Emily."

She seemed sincere, but Emily noticed that Paige was avoiding her auburn girl seemed to look everywhere but at her.

"Is everything all right, Paige?" Emily whispered.

"Yeah, yeah, it's just... I've been running," Paige answered.

Emily's eyes were studying her. Paige's cheeks were slightly red, and her hair was a bit disheveled. _I guess she was really impatient to see me after all. So, why the total lack of PDA? I know we're in public, but..._

"...So what, I don't even get a hug?" the tall raven-haired asked after a while.

"Oh, sorry. Yes, of course," Paige said sheepishly, before hugging Emily in an awkward way.

 _Something's wrong_ , Emily thought. _Why does she seem to be so uncomfortable around me?_

She opened her mouth to ask Paige what was really going on, but was surprised to feel Paige's hand taking her own and squeezing it.

"Come on Em," Paige said in her husky voice. "Let's take a seat. You must be hungry, and I'm starving. We'll talk later."

* * *

Emily was lying in bed, unable to sleep. Unlike her three roommates, apparently. One of them was even snoring softly. Emily sighed and grabbed her phone. She made sure the mute button was on before sending a text to Spencer.

'Hey Spence, are you up? I have something on my mind.'

Much to Emily's relief, the answer came almost immediately. _Thank you Spencer Hastings for being quite the insomniac._

'Hey Em, aren't you at the swim camp?' Spencer wrote.

'Yes, I am," Emily texted back.

I' thought Paige and you would have something more interesting to do than texting me at this time of night', Spencer replied.

 _Haha,_ Emily thought. _If only..._

'Very funny, Spence. That's part of the problem.'

'What do you mean, Em? Something's wrong between you two?'

'I don't know, maybe.'

'Em, you're starting to scare me. Did you two have a fight?'

Emily huffed in the dark.

'No, not at all,' she texted. 'But she's acting weird. We barely talked. We were supposed to catch up after dinner, but she bailed on me. She said she was exhausted, and that she needed to go to bed.'

This time, Emily had to wait for a while for Spencer's answer.

'Okay, that doesn't sound like Paige. Maybe she was just having a bad day?'

'Maybe.'

'Em, I don't think you have to worry. But I wish I could help you more. Do you want me to call McCullers first thing tomorrow and kick her ass, virtually speaking?'

Emily couldn't help smiling.

'Thanks for the offer, Spence. And no, I'd rather kick her ass myself,' she texted.

'Okay, now you're getting saucy. I'm not sure I want to hear that. We should end this weird, embarrassing nighttime conversation before it's too late, Fields.'

'Haha. Thanks anyway, Spence.'

'You're welcome, Em. Sleep tight.'

* * *

The following day, at breakfast, much to Emily's surprise, Paige acted as if everything was fine. She had saved the seat next to herfor Emily, and she even greeted her girlfriend with a hug and a quick kiss on the cheek. She introduced Emily to her roommates. And she seemed really proud to tell them that Emily had been scouted by several colleges, including Berkeley.

For the first time since she arrived at swim camp, Emily felt relaxed. Paige seemed to be back to her normal self, the outgoing, caring girl that Emily loved so much.

Except for one thing. Aside for her brief welcoming hug and the casual good-morning kiss, she hadn't touched Emily at all, not even briefly. She seemed resistant to any body contact, Emily observed.

Emily had let her hand linger on the table, next to Paige's, hoping that the girl will take the hint. But Paige had removed her own hand to her lap, without even grazing Emily's fingers.

Emily's next move was less subtle. The raven-haired girl, who was beginning to feel anxious and angry at the same time, decided to play footsie with Paige. Something they have done countless times in Rosewood and Oakland, during family dinners.

But as soon as Emily's foot touched Paige's calf, she felt the other girl tense up and back away. _Oh come on,_ Emily thought. She was starting to feel increasingly frustrated. She mouthed a ' _what's wrong_?' to Paige, who looked away, and muttered a ' _sorry_ ' that left Emily even more puzzled.

She didn't know what was going on, but she knew that they needed to talk. And _pronto_ , as Hanna Marin would say.

* * *

Emily's first day at swim camp went pleasant, and the raven-haired girl even enjoyed the morning and afternoon practises. Most of the swimmers were, like her, applying for athletic scholarships, but the atmosphere was relaxed and friendly. The beautiful location and the outstanding facilities of the camp helped, of course.

But Emily's mind was elsewhere. She was puzzled and worried by Paige's odd behavior. Paige wasn't ignoring her, but she had kept unusually quiet during practise, and hadn't seemed to be focused on her swimming.

Of course, Paige didn't have to worry anymore for her college future, having already earned a sholarship to Stanford. But it wasn't like her at all to act so unfocused and distracted. Emily knew how competitive Paige could be in the pool. And now, she seemed to have lost all her fighting spirit.

After the afternoon practise, the swimmers had free time before dinner. Most of the girls chose to relax and swim in the lake or play volleyball or table tennis in the recreation area. Michelle, Emily's roommate, asked the Rosewood girl if she wanted to join her and some other girls for a work-out session at the gym. Emily politely declined. She was determined to make Paige talk, even if she had to stalk the other girl for that to happen.

Paige took her time showering and drying her long, brown hair after practise. When she came back into the locker room, she wasn't surprised to find it almost empty, all the girls having already fled for their various free-time activities.

All the girls except Emily, who was waiting for her girlfriend near her locker, a determined look on her face.

"Emily, hey," Paige said with an uneasy smile.

"Hey?" asked Emily in a wry tone. "Really, Paige? Just 'hey'? that's all you have to say?"

"I don't know what you mean," Paige said, shrugging. She opened her locker and took her gym bag.

Emily stood up suddenly and grabbed Paige's arm, startling her.

"Look at me, Paige," Emily said in the most patient tone she could muster.

"I am looking at you," Paige mumbled. But her eyes were focused on her locker's door, not on Emily.

"Paige," Emily said more firmly. "I thought that swim camp was the opportunity for us to spend more time together?"

"Of course it is," Paige said. "And we're together now, right?"

Emily let out a frustrated sigh.

"Really? So why are you acting like a stranger to me?"

"Emily, I'm not..." Paige protested. "Listen, I know I've been... a little distant, but..."

"But what? What is the problem?" Emily asked.

"There's no problem," Paige said. "Emily, I'm sorry, really. I know you were looking forward to this time at swim camp."

"Of course!" Emily exclaimed. "And I thought you were, too."

"I was. I am. I'm just... a little bit preoccupied, that's all."

Paige sat on the bench and let out a sigh. Emily sat down next to her. She took Paige's hand in hers, and this time, the other girl didn't hold back.

"You know that you can tell me anything, Paige," Emily said softly.

"I know. I know. And I'm sorry, Emily. Listen, Em... let me make it up to you. We can skip dinner tonight, and have a little picnic of our own instead, if you want to? I know the perfect place, right by the lake."

Paige's tone seemed sincere, and her smile was back, much to Emily's relief. Emily squeezed Paige's hand and leaned over to kiss her on the cheek.

"Of course I want to," she said, smiling.

* * *

When Emily Fields needed some advice on relationships and love (not to mention sex), she'd ask her friend, Hanna Marin. Hanna could be a little scatty sometimes, but she had great instincts, and Emily trusted her completely.

So just before her encounter with Paige for their picnic, Emily gave Hanna a phone call. She explained to her friend that, since her arrival at the swim camp, Paige had been evasive, to say the least.

"I've tried several times to ask her what was wrong, but she keeps saying that everything's fine," Emily told Hanna. "What do you think I should do?"

"Em, gal, there's only one thing to do at this point," Hanna answered.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. It's very simple. Less talk, more action," Hanna said firmly.

At the other end of the line, Emily frowned. "You mean..."

"I mean, Fields. Just seduce her, period. What is your best move on a girl?"

"Hanna, I... I don't know," Emily stammered.

"Of course you do. You two had amazing sex back in California, right?" Hanna asked bluntly.

"Uh... well, yes, I mean, it was great, but... listen Hanna, I'd rather not talk about that,"a flustered Emily answered.

"That's precisely what I'm saying! You don't need to talk. You said she seemed to avoid any physical contact lately, right?"

"Yes," Emily sighed.

"Okay, so I don't know what's wrong with McCullers right now, but believe me, if you go straight to second base - or even third base, if you're bolder than I think you are, Fields - there's no way she'll be ablet to resist you. Unless she's crazy. Or straight, which we already know she's not."

Emily couldn't help giggling. _What was I thinking, calling Hanna? Of course she'd say something like that._

"So, basically, you're saying I should force her to have sex with me?" she asked, rolling her eyes, even though Hanna couldn't see her.

"Emily, who said that? I didn't. A French kiss might be enough. Well, for a start," Hanna retorted.

"...Okay, Hanna," Emily said after a beat. "I'll think about it." _Maybe I should call Aria for advice? Or Spencer?_

"Don't overthink it, Fields! And for god's sake, don't call Hastings," Hanna said in a stern voice.

 _Damn it_ , _Hanna_! Emily thought. _Is she reading my mind, or what?..._

"I wasn't gonna..." she protested.

"Yes, you were. But believe me, Spencer is no use when it comes to seduction."

"I'm sure she'd love to hear that," Emily said, rolling her eyes again.

"Well, you know what I mean. Spence's amazing, and gorgeous and all, and I love her, but she likes to twist herself in knots. And well, it's me you called first, right, Em?..."

"Right," Emily admitted.

"So, follow my lead," Hanna concluded.

* * *

Later that evening, Emily and Paige were sitting side by side on a dock by the lake. The picnic basket that the auburn girl had prepared hastily had remained untouched. Neither girl seemed to be hungry.

They hadn't talked much, either, simply exchanging a few mundane words about the camp and the weather. Emily was feeling more and more puzzled, and even close to exasperation.

She glanced at Paige, who was staring blankly at the lake in front of her. Taking a deep breath, Emily leaned over, and firmly grabbed Paige by the shoulders before crushing her lips against Paige's. She felt the other girl tense immediately, and she pulled back.

"Wow, Em," Paige said. "Easy."

Emily glared at her girlfriend in disbelief. _Easy? Really?!_

"You don't want to kiss me anymore?" Emily asked, trying not to sound desperate.

Paige shook her head. "Of course not, Emily. I mean, you can kiss me, of course. If you want to."

"Of course I want to!" Emily almost yelled, her anger rising. "What kind of question is that, seriously, Paige? We're girlfriends!"

Paige dipped her head. "Of course we are," she said in a low voice.

 _So what, then?_ Emily thought, but, instead of asking, she followed Hanna's advice and leaned over to kiss Paige again.

This time, the California girl didn't stop her, but Emily could tell that something was off. Their previous kisses had always been awesome; not always perfect, but undoubtedly sincere and even passionate sometimes. That wasn't the case tonight, by any means.

Emily pulled back, frustrated.

"What's wrong, Paige?" she asked, the worry and the hurt obvious in her voice.

Paige shook her head and looked away. "Nothing," she mumbled.

"No, it's not nothing. Why are you acting like this?" Emily pleaded.

Paige closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "I can't do this anymore..." she whispered.

"What do you mean, you can't do this anymore? What did I do wrong?" Emily asked, her voice almost breaking.

Paige felt a shiver run down her spine. _I have to tell her. Now._

"...You did nothing wrong, Em," the auburn girl said after a while."It's me. It's what I did. I can't lie to you anymore, Emily."

Emily felt her chest tighten in dread.

"What... what do you mean, Paige?" she asked in a weak voice.

Paige took her head in her hands. "Emily, I..." she said in a shaky voice. "I don't know how to tell you..."

"God Paige, just say it," Emily pleaded. _Whatever it is_ , _I can't take it anymore_.

"I... I cheated on you, Emily." Paige said despondently.

Emily closed her eyes. _No. No. Not that. It can't be true._

"...You did what?" she asked in a blank voice.

"I... I slept with someone else," Paige confessed, dipping her head.

Emily took a deep breath. _This isn't happening, is it? It's so... cliché. And awful._

"How... how could you..." she stammered. "Paige, tell me you're kidding."

Paige shook her head. "Emily, I would never joke about that. I'm... I'm so sorry," she said in a pleading voice.

"You're _sorry_?" Emily asked, her anger rising. "That's all you have to say?"

"No, well, yes... I don't know what else to say, Emily."

The auburn girl tried to reach for Emily's hand, but Emily didn't let her. She stood and began to pace back and forth.

"This is crazy," Emily said, not looking directly at Paige. "Is this why you were acting so weird? Is this why you were reluctant to kiss me, or even touch me? You don't have feelings for me anymore?"

"Oh god Em, no," Plaige said in a teary voice. "I... I still love you, I swear."

"You still love me?" Emily almost yelled. "You just told me that you slept with a random stranger!"

At these words, Paige dipped her head. "...it was not a random stranger," she whispered, her voice barely audible.

"What? Do you mean... it wasn't a one-time thing?" Emily asked incredulously.

Paige sighed deeply. "It happened... it happened twice, technically."

"Oh please Paige, spare me the details." Emily said dryly.

"But you asked!" Paige protested lamely.

Emily ran her hand through her hair. "This is a nightmare," she said. "I can't believe it. You just told me you had...an...an affair. Wait... is it even over?"

"Oh god Emily, of course it's over. It was a mistake, a big mistake. That girl means nothing to me," Paige said, her voice trembling. _God, I'm beginning to sound like a man_ , she thought bitterly.

"And when were you planning to tell me? Wait... it didn't happen _here_ , at the camp, right?" Emily asked with anger.

"Emily, no! It was back home, in California. Weeks ago."

"Weeks," Emily repeated. "Weeks. And you didn't say anything. You let me come here, to swim camp, to be with you. How stupid I am."

"Emily, no... I'm the only one to blame," Paige pleaded.

"You bet you are."

"And I didn't tell you because... because I know how important swim camp is for you. And for your college future. I know how eager you were to come here."

"Here with _you,_ Paige!" Emily yelled. "That was the point! I don't give a damn about this stupid swim camp! I came here to be _with you_!"

Emily stood up suddenly and began to pace back and forth on the small dock, feeling furious and distressed at the same time. Paige stood up, too, and tried to catch Emily's wrist.

"Emily, please listen to me..." she pleaded.

"No!" Emily snapped. "I don't want to hear your lame excuses! And don't touch me either!"

Paige dipped her head. "I have no excuse," she muttered.

"Exactly!" Emily yelled. "So just shut up!"

What happened next surprised both girls.

Emily took a step forward, and pushed violently Paige into the lake. The auburn girl fell backwards, splashing water all over. Paige surfaced a moment later, coughing and sputtering. The water wasn't deep there, near the shore, and she had hit her left ankle pretty hard on a rock.

But the physical pain was nothing compared to what she was feeling inside, watching Emily leaving, running off as fast as she could. Running away from her.

* * *

Emily spent the entire night sobbing in her bunk bed. Her roommates tried to ask her what was wrong, but she wouldn't answer.

Exhausted and drained from the tears, she finally fell asleep around four in the morning. When she woke up, she saw that Michelle and the two other girls were already getting ready for morning practise.

"Hey Emily," Michelle whispered softly when she saw that Emily was awake. "We didn't want to wake you up. You probably need to get more sleep."

"I'm fine," Emily lied, even though she was feeling like hell.

"I brought you some coffee from breakfast, and a granola bar," Michelle said.

"Thanks," Emily said in a hoarse voice.

"Oh, and there's this note for you," Michelle said. "We found it on the floor this morning. It has your name on it. Someone must have slid it under the door during the night. "

She handed a small piece of paper to Emily, who just nodded with a sad smile.

The raven-haired girl waited until her roommates were out of the cabin before unfolding the piece of paper. She had guessed whom it was from, of course, and although her first instinct told her to shred it into small pieces, she wanted to know.

 _What could she possibly say now?_ Emily thought bitterly _._

 _'Emily,'_ Paige had written. _'I know that you won't believe me, but I'm so sorry. Anyway, I can't stay here anymore. I don't deserve it, and mostly I don't deserve you. So I'm leaving. But you, you have to stay. This swim camp is very important for you, and for your college future. So hate me as much as you want to, Emily, but please don't give up your dreams because of me._ _PS: I couldn't text you this or call you, because my phone drowned when I fell in the water_. _You probably don't want to hear from me anymore anyway, and I totally understand. Again, I'm so sorry. Paige.'_

Later that morning, Emily called her childhood friends in Rosewood. She told them what happened, and asked for their advice about what she should do. Though Hanna wanted her to leave swim camp and come back to Rosewood immediately (and had also threatened to track Paige down and murder her), Aria and Spencer had more measured opinions.

"It's your choice, of course, Em," Spencer told her friend, "but Paige is right about one thing: It's your future. This swim camp is the perfect place to train with talented athletes and great coaches, and you've earned it."

Emily listened to Spencer's advice. She stayed at the camp and put all her anger and her fury into her swimming, winning almost all her races, and impressing her teammates and coaches with her determination. What they didn't know was that she was feeling dead inside.

A few days before the end of camp, an excited Pam Fields phoned her daughter. "Emily!" she said, "I know you should open it yourself, but we've just received this letter, it's from a California university, Emmy! And... it's a big envelope. Do you want me to open it for you?"

Emily didn't think twice. "Yes," she told her mother, her heart racing despite herself.

She heard her mother's gasp of joy on the other end of the line.

Berkeley wanted Emily next fall, and was offering her a full scholarship.

* * *

 **A/N: In the next chapter, we will be back to the present day. Stay tuned!**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Hello everyone! Well, sounds like I'm back to the Friday updates! :)**

 **Thank you to every reader and special thanks to the reviewers...**

 **To the guests (and other readers) who would like to know more about the cheating (why and when and with whom Paige did what she did...), well, there will be a flashback about that in chapter 8 (next week).**

 **For this update, we're back to present day (just after the end of chapter 5).**

 **A/N 2: Thank you so much** _ **siophiefandom**_ **, betareader extraordinaire! ;)**

* * *

 **Present day**

A few days later, Paige left for Europe. She sent Emily a brief text, just to let her know that she was in London and that everything was fine (although the British accent was a little difficult for her to understand sometimes).

Two weeks later, Emily received a postcard from Ireland. Paige didn't say much – just that she was staying at her mother's cousins', and that she loved everything about the country (aside from the weather).

After that, Emily didn't hear from Paige for weeks . She kept Paige's postcard from Ireland in her wallet, and took a look at it every day. Sometimes, several times a day. It was so Paige to send a postcard, Emily thought; Do people even send postcards anymore? Well, Paige apparently did. And Emily liked that, very much.

Somehow, the fact that she and Paige were on good terms again (even if they were now, geographically speaking, thousands of miles away) had a positive effect on Emily.

She felt soothed, less angry and on edge than before. For the first time in months, she was able to focus on her studies and even on meaningful student activities, such as tutoring children from surrounding middle schools or getting involved in Berkeley's LBGTQ group.

And, much to the relief of her roommate and of her Rosewood friends (who called her or Skyped with her at least once a week), she stopped being a "serial-dater". She was still partying, especially on weekends, but she stopped the meaningless dates and random hook-ups.

The week before Christmas, Emily fled back to Pennsylvania and spent the holidays in Rosewood with her parents.

The Fields house was beautifully decorated, as always, and Pam and Wayne were delighted (and also relieved) to see that their daughter seemed to be back to her normal self, the sweet and caring Emily they had raised. They carefully avoided broaching the subject of Emily's love life, though, because they could tell that their daughter was still sensitive about the subject.

On New Year's Eve, Emily was getting ready for Spencer's New Year party at the Hastings Residence when her cell phone went off.

Emily's heart skipped a beat when she checked the name on the screen. _Paige_.

She answered the call, her hands trembling slightly.

"Emily? Em? Can you hear me?" Paige's husky voice said at the other end of the line.

"Yes, Paige, I hear you," Emily said, trying to keep her voice even.

"Happy new year, Emmy! Do you know where I am?" Paige yelled excitedly.

 _Emmy?! Is she drunk? And where the hell is she now?_ Emily thought, before responding:

"Thanks, Paige, but just so you know, it's not New Year's here yet."

"I know! But it is here!" Paige almost screamed. "I'm in France, Emily! I'm in Paris!"

"Oh, really?" Emily asked, surprised. "That's... great, Paige. But how are you doing?"

"I'm doing great! I'm at the Champ-de-Mars, and the Eiffel Tower is riiiiiight in front of me! It's all lit up! And It's beautiful!" Paige exclaimed. She seemed beyond excited, and Emily was beginning to feel a little worried.

"Are you drunk, Paige?" she asked cautiously.

"Whaaat? Emily, what?"

"Did you have, um, too much French wine?"

"Nooo, no wine! Champagne, Emily! Champagne! It's New Year's Eve, gal!" Paige yelled.

"O-kay," Emily said. "But... are you safe, Paige? Are you by yourself there?"

"No, no, I'm with some great people! Thousands of great people, actually! I'm totally fine, Em!"

"Good," Emily said, though she was really getting worried. "But Paige..." she pleaded, "please keep yourself safe..."

"Listen Emily, I have to go! The fireworks are going to start!" Paige cut her off, her voice still louder than necessary.

"O... okay," Emily answered, puzzled. _Is she really okay?_

"Bye, Em! I love you!" Paige said before hanging up.

Emily stared at her phone, dumfounded.

 _Okay, I know she's drunk and all, but... did she really mean that?_

* * *

The following day, Emily texted Paige several times, asking whether everything was okay for her in France. She didn't get any response. Worried, she asked Spencer whether she had gotten any news.

"Oh yes, I did, as a matter of fact," Spencer told Emily. "Paige sent me a text this morning. She seems to be doing really great."

"Is she still in Paris?"

"Well, she didn't say. She just wrote that she was planning to go to Italy."

"She sure seems to be having some fun in Europe," Emily mumbled.

She felt relieved to learn that Paige was fine, but she was a little pissed at her ex for not answering her texts. Especially after that weird phone call.

Spencer glanced at her friend. "Emily..."

"Yes, Spencer?"

"Are you still mad at Paige?"

"Of course not, Spencer," Emily said in a defensive tone. "We're good now."

"Okay, good, so you should be happy for her then, right? After all she's been through with her mother's death, she deserves some lightness. And some fun."

"Of course she does. You don't have to tell me that, Spence."

"Okay then."

"Okay."

Spencer eyed her friend and sighed. She knew Emily all too well; they had been best friends since childhood. She could tell when something was bothering her. She also knew when Emily wanted to talk, or not to talk. And now was clearly not the time.

* * *

Two weeks after Paige's weird phone call, Emily received another postcard from Paige. This one had been sent from Prague, much to Emily's surprise. She didn't even know that Paige had planned to visit the Czech Republic.

' _Hi Emily, I'm in Prague right now'_ ,Paige had written. ' _The city is beyond beautiful. I wish you could see it, it's really amazing. So much history here... I'm sure you would love it.'_ Paige had added a P.S.: _'Sorry for the drunk phone call from Paris. I was a little tipsy I guess, but don't worry, nothing too bad. I just got caught in the moment (and in the champagne!).'_

After that, the days and weeks flew by, and Emily didn't hear from Paige directly, but she could count on Spencer for some news.

Apparently, her best friend and her ex were texting each other on a weekly basis. Though Emily was thankful to Spencer for giving her frequent updates, she was also beginning to feel a little jealous; frustrated even. Spencer's reports were always very brief and concise- 'Paige is in Germany now' - 'she's going to Italy next' - 'she visited the Sistine Chapel- lucky her!', but Emily was dying to know more. _How is she really doing? Is she able to sleep properly now? Is she still travelling alone? Has she met someone?..._ But Emily was too proud to ask Spencer for details - and she knew that her friend would respect Paige's privacy anyway.

In March, while Emily was cramming for midterms, she receveid another unexpected phone call. But this one was from Paige's uncle, Tim.

After reassuring Emily that Paige was fine (Emily's first thought was that something had happened to her), the young man asked whether they could meet somewhere. "I need your help for something, but I know you're busy, Emily, so I won't take too much of your time."

They agreed to meet in a cafe on Telegraph avenue in downtown Berkeley, the following day.

Emily was intrigued, and a little worried too. It had to be about Paige - whom else?

But why had her uncle insisted on meeting Emily in person? And how much, exactly, did he know about their bad breakup?

* * *

Emily and Tim met on a Tuesday morning, as planned. Mudrackers Café on Telegraph Avenue was a nice, cozy place, which Emily had visited a few times with some friends. It was located in downtown Berkeley, but very close to the campus.

When Emily entered the café, she immediately spotted Tim, who was casually chatting with the owner at the counter. Tim waved at her, a big smile on his face, and Emily couldn't help but notice, once more, the stricking resemblance between Paige and her uncle. Aside from the eyes - Paige had Nick McCullers' big brown eyes.

Emily walked to the counter, a bit hesitant - she didn't know where she stood with Tim now, though the young man had always been nothing but charming with her in the past.

"Hi," she said. "Sorry, I'm a bit late."

"It's fine Emily, I was talking with Andrew here. It's really great to see you! You look amazing!" Tim said before giving Emily a brief but warm hug.

"Yeah, it's been a while," Emily answered. "It's... it's nice to see you, too," she said.

She was sincere, but also a little uncomfortable. There was the 'Paige situation', of course, but also Jennifer McCullers' death. What were you supposed to say to someone who had lost his sister several months earlier? Were you even supposed to talk about that? Was is too late to say 'I'm sorry for your loss'?...

"Have you had breakfast, Emily?" Tim asked, interrupting Emily's train of thought.

"Um, no, I just had a coffee," Emily answered.

"Well in that case, let me tempt you with the Muffin Combo. It's awesome. And I remember you love muffins, Emily Fields!" he teased.

Emily couldn't help but smile at the young man. "That's true," she admitted.

They sat down at a table at the back of the small café. Emily's nervousness was back, now that the greetings had been exchanged. Andrew, the café's owner, brought them their breakfast. Emily took a bite of her banana muffin. It was delicious, and Emily couldn't help but let out a small moan.

"Told you," Tim said with a grin, and Emily smiled back at him, a light blush on her cheeks.

They sipped their coffees in silence, and then Tim cleared his throat.

"So," he began, his voice serious now. His almond-shaped, piercing green eyes seemed to be studying Emily.

"So," Emily repeated, cursing herself for not knowing what else to say.

"You must be wondering why I asked you to meet me," Tim said.

"Well, yes..." Emily answered, looking down and fidgeting with her napkin. "I mean, it's great to see you, but..."

Tim smiled kindly at the younger girl. "It's okay Emily, I totally understand. Well, as you may have already guessed, it's about Paige."

Emily simply nodded, her throat tight.

"... You and Paige... you two are on speaking terms again, right?" Tim asked.

"Um, yes, we're good now," Emily said. "But I haven't heard from her in weeks ... wait, is she okay?" she asked, alarmed, even though Tim had assured her on the phone that Paige was safe.

"Oh yes, Paige is perfectly fine, don't worry, Emily. Actually, she's coming back home," Tim said.

"She's... she's coming back? From Europe?" Emily asked, her heart racing.

"Yeah. That's why I wanted to see you. To be honest, I need your help, Emily. You know, Paige told me on the phone that she's flying back home next Sunday."

 _Paige is coming back_ , Emily thought. _Next Sunday. Five days from now._

She closed her eyes briefly, and tried to compose herself. It was difficult, even for her, to tell what her most prominent feeling was at the moment. Relief. Excitement. Apprehension. _Joy_.

She felt Tim's hand on hers.

"You're okay, Emily?" the young man asked, concerned.

"Oh yes," Emily said. "I'm sorry, it's just... I'm surprised, I guess," she said with a hesitant smile.

Tim smiled back at her, and let go of her hand.

"I was surprised too, believe me. Last time I was on the phone with her, she wasn't talking about coming back. Not that I'm complaining, of course. I missed her," the curly-haired man said. "Paigey can be a pain in the ass, but well, I love her, and I really missed her, you know?"

 _Oh yes, I do,_ Emily thought _._

"So Tim," she said tentatively. "You told me on the phone that you needed my help for something? Do... do you want me to pick up Paige at the aiport?"

"Um, not exactly, Emily," the young man answered.

Emily's brow furrowed.

"The thing is, Emily," Tim began, "I can't be in Oakland next weekend. I have this trip scheduled, with my girlfriend, Nora, you know?"

Emily nodded. She had met Tim's girlfriend once at the McCullerses' last Spring. Nora was a perky, petite dark-haired girl who reminded Emily of her friend Aria.

"And it's not something I can cancel," Tim resumed. "We're going to Reno, to see her folks. We have something important to announce. Nora's pregnant, you see," he said with a proud smile.

"Oh Tim, that's great!" Emily exclaimed. "You both must be so happy!"

Tim grinned. "We are. We're gonna be parents, Emily, can you imagine?"

"I'm really happy for you, Tim," Emily said sincerely.

"Well, thank you, Emily. You know, Nora and I... we were high school sweethearts," he confessed.

"I didn't know that," Emily said, surprised. Paige had basically told her that her uncle used to be quite the player, especially when he was in college.

"Yeah. Not that there weren't bumps in the road. We even split up for a few years... but that's another story. What I wanted to ask you, Emily," Tim said, getting back to his point, "has to do with Paige's return, of course."

"Yeah, I figured," Emily said softly.

"You know, I don't want her to come back to an empty house. And since... Jenn's death, and with Nick back in Nebraska now..." Tim's voice trailed off, and he gazed off to she side, resuming a moment later. "I've been taking care of the house, of course, but I want Paige to feel at home, you know?" he asked.

"I mean, every time she came back from a trip, my sister was there to welcome her, to take care of her. There was always some music playing, a cake baked... well, you get the picture," the young man said with a sad smile.

Emily just nodded.

"...Don't get me wrong, Emily, I'm not asking you to replace her mom, but... I just don't want Paige to be all alone when she gets back," Tim explained.

Emily wasn't saying anything, and Tim took her silence for a no.

"I'm sorry, Emily," the young man said. "I know that you and Paige had your issues. I'm probably asking for too much..."

Emily shook her head vigorously.

"Oh no, Tim, I'll do it. You want me to be in the house when she gets back from the airport, right?" she asked with a genuine smile.  
Tim face's lit up. "Yeah, that's the idea," he said. "I brought the house keys for you, just in case. You know, I want Paige to see a friendly face first thing whe she gets home. And a welcoming place, you know? I mean, nothing big, just a house with the lights on, and maybe something ready to eat... I would do it myself, of course, if I could, but with this Nora thing..."

"It's okay, Tim," Emily assured him. "Spend your weekend with Nora, as planned. I'll take care of everything." _I'll take care of her._

* * *

 **A/N: Yes guys, Paige is coming back home! Are you happy? ;) I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Don't forget to review please! It really means a lot.**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: A special thank you to** _ **siophiefandom**_ **\- her betareading was much needed! This chapter was difficult to write, especially the flashback part.**

 **About that - you readers will find out more about the cheating. And if you want to picture Lauren, imagine Lara Perkins on "The L World" (yes, the soup chef!) ;)**

 **I'm really eager to have your feedback about this chapter, so reviews are very welcome... as always!**

* * *

Paige McCullers woke up with a start at the sound of the 'fasten your seatbelts' tone. Apparently, her flight was going through an area of turbulence.

 _Another one,_ Paige thought. Since takeoff, eleven hours ago, from Dublin aiport, she hadn't been able to sleep more than a few minutes at a time.

Paige's seatmates didn't seem to have that problem. They were both sleeping peacefully. Paige had the worst seat -the middle one- and she was stuck between an old man who seemed to be rather nice, but who had been snoring loudly for the majority of the flight, and a moody teenager who hadn't looked up from his tablet since takeoff.

Sighing, Paige reached for her cell phone and put her headphones on. She scrolled through her playlist to the song she had been listening non-stop in the past few weeks: _'Missing You'_ by John Waite and Alison Krauss. She pressed the play button and closed her eyes, sinking lower into her seat.

Within seconds, the husky voices of the singers resonated in Paige's ears, and the auburn girl immediately felt shivers roll through her body. The lyrics resonated so deeply with her current mood and thoughts, especially her thoughts concerning a certain raven-haired girl.

 _'_ _Every time I think of you  
_ _I always catch my breath  
And I'm still standing here  
And you're miles away  
And I'm wondering why you left _

_And there's a storm that's raging  
Through my frozen heart tonight  
I hear your name in certain circles  
And it always makes me smile _

_I spend my time  
Thinking about you  
And it's almost driving me wild  
And there's a heart that's breaking  
Down this long distance line tonight _

_I ain't missing you at all  
Since you've been gone  
Away...'_

Without even realizing it, Paige was humming the song softly. With her eyes closed, she missed the amused smile that the flight attendant who was walking up and down the aisle gave her.

Paige listened to the song again and again, only stopping when she heard the landing announcement. The plane was approaching San Francisco International Airport, and Paige let out a sigh of relief.

"...it's good to get here, finally, right?" said a voice next to her, and Paige, startled, turned to her left to see the old man, who had been sleeping the whole flight, now smiling gently at her.

Paige nodded. "Yes, I'm glad this journey is almost over," she said.

"Believe me, me too," the older man said with a wink. "I know I slept most of the time, but still, it's too long. Especially for an old man like me."

Paige smiled politely at the man, not knowing what to say next.

"...I always ask for the aisle seat, so I can get up and walk a bit, but you, dear, you had the worst seat. You must feel so cramped," the old man went on.

Paige shrugged. "Oh, it's okay," she said with a small smile, even though she couldn't wait to get up and stretch her legs.

"It's almost over anyway," the man said. "Unless they make us circle the airport, as they like to do sometimes."

Paige cringed at those words. "Oh, I hope not," she said with a sigh.

"But it probably won't happen," the old man said in a measured tone.

Paige smiled at him, but she was feeling increasingly nervous. She wasn't used to long flights, having traveled by train, for the most part, during her time in Europe. She chose the train mainly because it was cheaper, but also because it was the best way to see the landscape. This was actually only the second long-distance flight she had ever taken, the first being her flight from California to London, a few months earlier.

Sensing his neighbor's nervousness, the old man reached for Paige's arm and squeezed it softly.

"Everything is going to be okay, dear," he whispered. Paige felt a blush warm her cheeks, even though neither the gesture nor his tone was flirtatious. The man was at least in his eighties, and he seemed to be genuinely kind.

"You're coming back home, right?" the man asked.

"Yes," Paige admitted. _Though I don't really know where home is anymore_.

"Were you studying abroad?"

"No, I... actually, I'm a college student at Stanford. I took... a break, and I spent the last few months traveling through Europe," Paige explained.

"That's wonderful!" the man exclaimed. "I wish I had done that when I was younger. There are so many beautiful places to see. And interesting people to meet."

"Yes," Paige smiled. "That's right, sir."

"Oh please, call me Arthur," the old man said. "I know I'm old enough to be your great grand-father, but well, I'm not," he teased. "What's your name, dear? If you don't mind me asking."

"No, of course not, sir. I mean Arthur. My name is Paige, Paige McCullers," the auburn girl said.

"Paige McCullers. What a strong and interesting name. Are you of Irish descent?" the old man asked.

"Actually, my ancestors were from Scotland on my father's side, and Ireland on my mother's side," Paige explained. "I actually spent a few weeks at my mom's cousins' in Cork." Her voice faltered a bit at the mention of her mother, and it wasn't lost on the old man, who decided not to push the subject.

"Really? That must have been so nice. Did you like Ireland?" he asked.

"Yes sir, I mean Arthur. Very much. The country is beautiful, and the people there are so warm and welcoming."

"They are, indeed," the old man nodded. "And the Guinness beer. Don't forget the Guinness," the old man said with a wink.

"Well, the Guinness is okay, but I've discovered that I'm more of a whiskey kind of girl," Paige confessed.

"Really?" the man asked. "Whiskey? That must be the Scottish blood talking, then, Paige McCullers," he teased.

"I guess," Paige smiled. "...Not that I spent my entire trip drinking," she added. "Of course not. That wasn't... the point."

"And what was the point, Paige?" Arthur asked. "If you don't mind me asking," he said a second time.

Paige shrugged. "I just... needed to go away, I guess," she said. "I... I've been through a lot lately, and I needed a break, you know."

"I can tell," the old man said gently. "Sometimes, breaks are much needed. And are you feeling better now, dear?"

Paige looked at the man. It felt a bit strange, confiding in a total stranger, but it was oddly comforting.

"I don't know," Paige said with sincerity. "It was great to travel, but I'm happy to be back, I guess. And to tell you the truth, I had to go back home anyway, because, well, I'm really broke now. Traveling abroad is expensive, even if you try not to spend too much," she grinned, and the old man nodded.

"Are you planning to go back to college?" he asked.

"Probably. I haven't decided yet. And... I don't know whether of not I'm ready. I have... things to fix, and people to... reach out to," Paige confessed. _If it's not too late._

Arthur smiled at the younger girl.

"Then you know what you have to do, Paige. Everything will work out fine, I'm sure of it. You seem to be a very smart and very sweet girl. So have faith in yourself, and you'll do the right thing. Trust an old, wise man," he concluded in a stern tone, though his eyes were smiling.

"Thank you," Paige simply said.

An announcement came through the speakers. The plane was making its final approach for landing.

* * *

Paige took a taxi from the airport in San Francisco to Oakland. It was rather expensive (and, as she had told Arthur, her seatmate, she was really broke after a few months in Europe), but she was exhausted, not having been able to sleep in the plane. The jet-lag wasn't helping, either.

The taxi driver was rather chatty at first, but he stopped talking when he peered into the rear view mirror and saw that his fare was fighting off sleep. Luckily for Paige, the ride didn't take too long. It was Sunday afternoon, and the traffic is rather light on Sundays, at that time of day, even in the Bay Area.

Paige opened her eyes and yawned as the vehicule entered her neighborhood in Oakland. Everything around her looked very familiar to Paige, of course, but, oddly, it also felt different. As if Paige were looking at those streets, those houses, those bystanders, with different eyes. As if she'd be gone for years, rather than months.

A few blocks before the McCullerses' street, the taxi had to stop at a red light, just in front of a small bakery. Paige tensed when she recognized the place. It wasn't just any old bakery. The place was owned by Lauren, the woman with whom Paige had had a brief sexual encounter.

Reflexively, Paige dipped her head and looked down. It was childhish -and unnecessary, considering the store was closed. And it wasn't as if Lauren had stalked her after... what had happened between them.

Paige let out a breath and closed her eyes. _Get a grip, McCul_ lers, she thought. _How come you still feel so guilty, even after all those months?..._

* * *

 _ **Ten months ago - Oakland, California.**_

Paige was running. Running away from her house, running away from her father. They had fought, again. It wasn't the first time, especially when Jenn McCullers wasn't around to temper her husband and daughter, who could both be very stubborn.

But this time, things had gotten pretty ugly. Harsh words had been exchanged between the two McCullerses, culminating in Nick yelling at his daughter that she was such a disappointment to him. It was very unfair, of course, and it wasn't even true -Nick McCullers was very proud of his daughter, but he wasn't the type to say that out loud. He came from a family where you didn't express your feelings towards each other. And he had great expectations for Paige -his only child, after his son Ryan's death.

That night, they had fought over Paige's future career choice; Paige wanted to study environmental engineering in college, but her father had other plans. He wanted his daughter to take as many business courses as she could at Stanford, so that she could build and run her own company after she gratuated.

He had some personal reasons for that. Nick McCullers had been a successful entrepreneur for years, before a dishonest partner ruined his business. It was a few months after Ryan's tragic death, and the McCullerses, who were already heartbroken of course, also had to leave their big house and move into a smaller home, in a much more modest neighborhood of Oakland.

Nick had found another position a few months after that, but it was a less skilled position, and the wage was just average. It had made him bitter - and he was already berating himself for not being able to take care of his family. (He secretly felt responsible for Ryan's death, even though it was an accident).

When a ten-year-old Paige had told him that she not only wanted to learn how to swim, but also wanted to become the best swimmer ever, Nick had devoted all his energy and free time to this goal. He had engaged the best swim coaches for his daughter, even though the family didn't have much money left. He had made sure that Paige attended schools with the best athletic and academic programs. He enrolled her in Carson High School, which was located on the opposite of town, but had by far the best swim program in Oakland.

And it had worked. Paige had become a successful swimmer, as well as a great student - and a beautiful young woman. She had a bright future ahead of her. Nick had never been prouder of his daughter than when several top-notch universities, including Stanford, offered her a full ride. But he was too self-guarded to tell Paige how proud of her he was. "She can count on you for that," he always told his wife, who had a very different temperament - more outgoing- and who, unlike him, wasn't afraid to show her true feelings.

But that night, Jennifer McCullers (a nurse, who often worked the night-shift) hadn't been home to stop the fight between her husband and her daughter.

So now Paige was running, angry tears rolling down her cheeks. She hated herself for losing her temper so easily, and she hated her father for wanting to control every aspect of her life. _"I'm never good enough for you, no matter what I do_!" she had yelled at him angrily. And then Nick McCullers had snapped back: " _That's right. You're such a disappointment."_

He had said those exact words once before, a few years earlier, when Paige had come out. it had been a rough time, and Paige had even thought about leaving the house, but her mother had been there to stand up for her. After weeks of tense silence between father and daughter, they had eventually come to an agreement. Paige's sexual orientation and her love life were her own private business, and Nick was only allowed to focus on his daughter's studies and swim training.

But this time, he had gone too far. Paige was almost a college student; she felt responsible for her own choices, and she wanted to choose her future career by herself.

Paige's long and erratic run ended abruptly when she made a sharp turn at a crossroads and bumped into someone. The impact made Paige fall backwards onto the sidewalk, while the woman she had collided with stumbled and protested indignantly: "Hey! Watch out!"

"Sorry," Paige muttered, her face etched with pain and embarrassment. "I didn't see you."

"Obviously," the woman snorted.

Paige tried to get up, but winced in pain. She had hurt her right elbow pretty hard, and her head was spinning.

The young woman squatted near Paige and put a hand on her shoulder.

"Let me help you," she said, looking concerned. "You must feel pretty dizzy."

"I'm fine," Paige stammered.

The woman shook her head. "You're obviously not fine."

"I'm okay," Paige said stubbornly.

The woman just shrugged, but it was clear that she wasn't buying it.

She helped Paige stand up, earning a 'thanks' from the younger girl.

Paige gazed at the woman and frowned. She looked oddly familiar.

"Do we know each other?" she asked.

The woman grinned. "Well, I do know you. You're Paige. You used to come to my bakery pretty often. Especially on Sundays, with your uncle, Tim."

"Oh, yes, right," Paige said.

She remembered her immediately; Lauren owned a small but very popular bakery nearby. Her cupcakes were famous in the neighborhood, and so was her charm. Lauren was a gorgeous, tall young woman, with reddish hair and deep blue eyes. Tim, Paige's uncle, had a soft spot for her for a while, and had often used his niece, who loved Lauren's pastries, as an excuse for spending some time at the bakery, even though he didn't live in that neighborhood.

"How come you don't come by the shop anymore?" Lauren asked. "I haven't seen you in a while. You don't like coconut cupcakes anymore?" she asked with a teasing smile.

Paige blushed and shrugged. "Yes, I do. But I have to follow a strict diet now. I'm applying for an athletic scholarship at Stanford."

"Oh, you're an athlete. Obviously. You have quite the perfect body," the young woman said approvingly, before winking at Paige.

Paige frowned. _Is she flirting with me?..._

"I... I have to go, now," she stammered, feeling uncomfortable.

"Okay," Lauren said simply. "I figured you were in a hurry, running so fast."

Her voice was soft and sweet, and she smiled gently at the younger girl.

"Yeah," Paige muttered, dipping her head. "Sorry, for running into you." _She's just being kind, that's all. People can be genuinely nice, without ulterior motives. Not everybody is like my father._

"Oh, it was nothing, Paige. Just be careful, okay? I don't want you to get hurt. You have to stay in good shape for that scholarship."

Paige nodded, her eyes still focused on the sidewalk. "I guess," she said in a small voice. She was suddenly on the verge of tears, and she didn't really know why.

"Hey," Lauren said. "Are you really okay?"

Paige shrugged. "Yeah," she croaked. "It's just that..."

She sighed deeply. She could feel Lauren's concerned eyes on her.

"...You look as if you could use a break from running," the woman said. "How about an orange juice, or a hot chocolate? The bakery is closed right now, but being the owner has it perks. I have the keys," she joked.

Paige seemed to hesitate, before admitting: "...I could use a break, and a drink."

Lauren's small bakery was charming, like its owner. Paige sipped her fruit juice in silence, listening to the young woman, who was explaining how she wanted to expand her business. Lauren was confident, but not cocky, and her blue eyes were sparkling with excitement while she talked. She seemed to have a real passion for her job. She was only twenty-four, but she had opened her own bakery at twenty, she told Paige, and since then, it had been a success.

"...and what about you, Paige?" Lauren asked. "Do you already know what you want to do for a living?"

"Um, not really," Paige answered. "I mean, even if I can manage to swim professionnally, it's not a long-term job. I have to decide on a career, I guess," she shrugged.

"But you still have time for that. You're so young," Lauren stated.

"Well, try telling my dad that," Paige sighed.

"He's pressuring you to choose a career?"

"Yeah," Paige muttered. "You could say that."

"It seems to bother you," Lauren observed.

"He wants to run my life," Paige said in frustration. "He's treating me like a kid."

"And you're not a kid anymore."

"No. I'm nineteen now," Paige said. "I should be able to choose for myself."

"Absolutely," Lauren approved.

"It's the same with my love life," Paige grumbled. "He says he's okay now with me being gay, but I know he's lying."

"You're gay?" Lauren asked.

Paige glanced at her. "...Yeah," she said. "Why, do you object? Is that a problem?" she asked, her voice defiant.

The woman giggled. "Of course not, Paige. And just so you know, I'm bi myself."

"Oh," Paige said, surprised. "Okay then. Sorry for snapping at you."

"It's fine. But... do you feel this tense all the time?"

Paige shrugged. "It depends. When my father is not getting after me, I'm okay with myself. And with other people, I guess. But I'm afraid he brings out the worst in me," she said in a frustrated voice.

The woman shook her head.

"Don't think like that, Paige. You have a good soul."

"How could you know that?" Paige snorted.

"I can tell," the woman said soflty. She leaned forward, her eyes fixed on Paige. The auburn girl dipped her head. She felt Lauren's fingers graze her cheek.

Paige stiffened immediately, and the woman backed away.

"I'm sorry, Paige," she said. "I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. It's just that you are so..."

What happened next surprised both women. Paige cut Lauren off by kissing her on the lips, tentatively first, and then more purposefully. Lauren answered the kiss by grabbing Paige's waist, and putting her closer.

When their lips eventually separated, they stared at each other, their breaths short. Lauren's baby blue eyes were now turning darker, and Paige could feel her own body tingling. Paige was really turned on, and that realization fulled her with guilt. And desire.

* * *

Three hours later, Paige was lying naked in Lauren's bed, staring at the ceiling, the other woman sound asleep next to her.

Lauren lived above the shop, in a tiny but cozy appartment. They had made it to the bedroom after some very hot foreplay in the back of the bakery.

Paige's desire was mostly fueled by anger (against her father, mostly, but against herself too) - but also by pure lust. She was deeply in love with Emily Fields, but a long-distance relationship was difficult to handle, especially the physical aspect, especially at nineteen.

So Paige shut down all the guilty thoughts that had crossed her mind, all the warnings that told her to stop before it was too late. She knew that what she was doing was wrong, but she wasn't able to stop. She knew that she had crossed a line by kissing Lauren, even though it was on an impulse. She could have stopped right there, but she wanted more. Her body needed the realease, her heart needed the comfort, and Lauren just happened to be there, offering her all of that and more.

And it had been intense. Paige had only had two lovers in her life, Shana and Emily. Lauren, on the other hand, was an experienced young woman. And it showed.

Once in the bedroom, Lauren took the lead. She hadn't taken advantage of the younger girl though; she constantly asked Paige whether she was really sure and assured her that they could stop at any time.

But Paige hadn't wanted to stop.

They had sex twice, the first time a bit rushed; the second, more purposeful and even almost tender.

Lauren had kissed Paige's swollen lips one last time before snuggling against the younger girl and drifting peacefully off to sleep .

And now Paige was staring at the ceiling, her body satisfied, but her heart heavy.

After an hour or so, Paige silently crept out of Lauren's bed, and began to look for her clothes, which were scattered accross the floor. She began to get dressed, but it wasn't easy in the semi-darkness, and she cursed herself when she realized that she couldn't find her shirt.

She briefly thought about stealing one of Lauren's shirts, but that wasn't really an option. Sighing, she eventually decided to wake up the other woman. She turned on the bedside light and shook Lauren's shoulder lightly.

"Lauren," Paige said. "Lauren, wake up."

The young woman blinked and opened her eyes. "Hey," she simply said. "You're okay?"

"I have to go," Paige said nervously. "But I can't find my shirt."

"Check the stairs or the back of the store," Lauren said. "You'll probably find it there."

Her blue eyes were studying Paige, and she was wearing a half-smile that Paige didn't like very much.

"I'm glad to see that you seem to find all this very funny," Paige groaned.

"Oh come on Paige. If you don't find your shirt, you can always borrow one of mine," Lauren said, rolling her eyes.

"I'm not talking about that," Paige muttered, before sitting on the bed, her back to the other woman. She took her head in her hands, and stiffened when she felt Lauren's hand on her shoulder.

"Are you having second thoughts, Paige?" Lauren asked. "It's a little late for that," she teased.

"You don't understand," Paige said in a shaky voice. "I don't do this," she stammered. "I don't."

"Well, I usually don't do it either," the young woman said in a soft tone. "But I guess we both needed the release, that's all."

"Maybe for you," Paige whispered. "But I have a girlfriend. And I'm in love with her."

"So what? I have a boyfriend myself. And I love him too. That doesn't mean that I didn't enjoy what we did. And that doesn't mean that they have to know."

Paige turned back and stared at Lauren in disbelief. "How can you be so cool about it?"

"Sometimes, sex is just sex, Paige," Lauren said. "Don't overthink it too much."

* * *

 **Oakland, California. Present day.**

The taxi stopped in front of the yellow, two-story house, and Paige felt her heart tighten a bit. She was glad to be back home - but was this place home anymore?

Taking a deep breath, she grabbed her bags and walked to the front door. She rummaged through her purse for her keys and was about to open the door when she realized it wasn't locked.

 _I guess Tim is here_ , Paige thought, relieved. _How nice of him._ Her flight had been delayed, and she hadn't expected her uncle to wait for her for so long.

She entered the house and smiled when she saw the lights on and heard the soft music playing in the background. _Well, I didn't know that Tim liked Diana Krall, but that's nice._ There was this pleasant scent in the air, too - as if something good were cooking in the kitchen.

Paige walked into the living room, ready to greet and tease her uncle. "Hey Timmy boy, you're becoming quite the perfect..." she started. Her words died on her lips when she spotted the dark-haired girl who was sound asleep on the couch.

 _Emily..._


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: I'm so glad you guys are still reading the story - and liking it! Thank you for all the views and the reviews, it really means a lot.**

 **I have made you wait long enough for a Paily scene, I know!... So, there it is...**

 **A/N 2: Once again, you're reading a mistake-free chapter thanks to _siophiefandom,_ the best betareader in the universe of fanfiction! Thank you so much!**

* * *

 ** _(CH7_** ** _:...Her words d_ _ied on her lips when she spotted the dark-haired girl who was sound asleep on the couch...)_**

 ** _Oakland - Present day_**

Her heart racing, Paige tiptoed to the couch and knelt down.

"Em..." she said, mesmerized by the sight of the sleeping girl in front of her.

With a trembling hand, she stroked Emily's cheek. Emily wriggled slightly. An adorable pout formed on her lips, but her eyes remained closed.

"Em..." Paige whispered again, almost reverently. She brushed a loose strand of hair from Emily's face.

This time, Emily opened her eyes, and blinked a couple of times.

"Paige?" she asked. "Is that really you?"

"Yeah," Paige said in a croaking voice. She was elated to find Emily there, of course, but she didn't really know what to expect from her ex-girlfriend.

The next thing she knew, Emily was engulfing her in a tight hug, catching her off guard.

"Paige, Paige," Emily said, as if she couldn't believe her own eyes. "You're back!" She squezzed her harder, earning a small squeak from Paige.

"Sorry," Emily giggled, before loosening up her grip.

She took a step back, her hands still on Paige's arms. "You're back," she repeated, her grin growing wider at Paige's flabbergasted expression.

"Well, yeah, I'm... Emily, how come you're here?" Paige stammered.

"Well, it was supposed to be a surprise. And are you? Surprised?" Emily asked, even though she knew the answer.

Paige let out a brief but happy laugh. "Yes, you could say that."

"And...good surprised?" Emily asked in a hopeful voice.

"Definitely," Paige said, her goofy grin now matching Emily's, faltering only when a thought crossed her mind.

"Hey, wait," Paige said. "It's Sunday; aren't you supposed to be working at the Blue Bird?"

"I called in sick," Emily confessed, a slight blush on her cheeks.

Paige giggled and said in a soft voice: "Well, I'm so glad you did."

They remained silent for a minute, simply staring into each other's eyes.

"...You look good," Emily observed.

It was true; Paige looked significantly better than when she had when she was about to leave for Europe, the last time Emily had seen her. While still slim and athletic, Paige had gained back some much-needed weight, and her skin looked radiant. Her hair was shorter than before, with chestnut highlights that matched her beautiful eyes.

"...I don't know about me, but you, you look amazingly beautiful, as always, Em," Paige answered, smiling softly.

Emily rolled her eyes. "Oooh, still the sweet talker, McCullers. I see that Europe didn't change that," she teased.

Paige felt a blush warm her cheeks. "I guess not," she said, dipping her head. _Especially when it comes to you, Emily Fields._

Paige took a step back. As amazed as she was to have Emily right there in front of her, she still didn't know where exactly they stood with each other. They had so much to talk about.

Emily's eyes were studying Paige, as if she was trying to read her mind. Paige cleared her throat and was about to say something when a shrill sound echoed through the house, startling the two girls.

"What is it?" a worried Emily asked.

Paige frowned. "Sounds like the fire alarm," she said.

"Oh shit!" Emily exclaimed. "The chicken casserole!"

"The what?" Paige asked, puzzled.

"The chicken casserole! On the stove!" Emily squealed, before rushing into the kitchen, Paige on her heels.

There wasn't much damage in the kitchen yet, but Emily's chicken casserole was definitely ruined. Paige turned off the alarm and opened the windows to help dissipate the smell and the smoke.

Emily began ranting. "I can't believe I fell asleep," she kept repeating, waving her hands in frustration. "It took hours to prepare! And it was my mother's recipe!"

Paige was staring at her, an amused smile on her lips.

"What?" Emily grumbled.

"You cooked for me," Paige said smugly.

Emily shrugged. "Well, yeah. I figured you'd be hungry after such a long trip."

"It's fine," Paige said. "I actually ate during the flight. They fed us serveral times."

"Airplane food!" Emily snorted. "That's not even food, Paige."

"I grant you that," Paige said, still grinning. "It was mostly snacks."

Her eyes were sparkling with joy, Emily realized. She hadn't seen that look in Paige's eyes for almost a year.

"I so missed you" Emily blurted out, much to her own surprise.

She looked uncomfortable, but sincere, and Paige moved towards her and took her in her arms, before burying her head in Emily's neck.

"I missed you too, Em," she said.

She felt Emily's fingers soothing her hair softly. Paige felt her chest tighten and let out a small sob. "Emily..." she said in a hoarse voice, the tears welling in her eyes.

"Shh," Emily whispered, squeezing her harder.

"I... I can't believe you're here," Paige stammered. "Here... with me, for me, after... after all that happened."

"Well, I'm here, as you can see, McCullers. But you must stop doing that, you know," Emily whispered in Paige's ear.

"Doing what?"

"Running away." _Running away from me._

Paige smiled sadly. "This time, it was different, Emily," she said.

She dipped her head, and Emily reached over to lift the other girl's chin.

"I know, Paige," she said softly. "You needed this time away, and... and alone."

"Yeah, I really did," Paige said in a whisper, her voice barely audible. Emily's fingers on her skin still made her shiver.

"I had a lot of things to process, I guess. And it helped," Paige said.

"That's great," Emily said. "I'm so glad you're feeling better."

"But, Em..."

"Yes?"

"It's good to be back. And... it's so good to have you here," Paige said, before hugging Emily again. She felt something wet on her face and she realized that it was her own tears. But this time, she didn't fight them.

They remained like that for a little while, until Paige stopped crying. Then they released their embrace and stared at each other, their smiles still tentative.

"I shouldn't be crying," Paige said, shaking her head. "I mean, I'm happy, it's a happy day. I'm back, and you're here," she said, wiping the tears from her eyes.

"Oh yeah," Emily softly giggled. "I'm here, and I ruined dinner."

"Oh it's fine Em, we can always order a pizza." Paige knew that pizza was Emily's favorite food, and ordering one would also spare them the trouble of cooking.

"Pizza? Oh yes, definitely," Emily beamed. "And you know what? I made dessert! It's in the fridge."

"Oh yeah? What did you make?" Paige asked.

"Tiramisu," Emily said proudly.

"Oooh, Tiramisu! So we're going all Italian tonight then!" Paige said, wagging her

eyebrows. "It's as if I'm still in Europe after all. But I'm so glad to be back," she quickly added, when she saw Emily's smile falter a little.

Emily ordered the pizza while Paige took a shower upstairs. The raven-haired girl had already set the table, and was considering whether it might be appropriate or not to open a bottle of wine, when Paige came back in the room. She had changed clothes, and was now wearing some grey sweat pants and a white v-neck t-shirt with Paris logo on it. Emily tried not to stare, but she couldn't help noticing that her ex-girlfriend really looked in good shape. _And smoking hot._

"I'm sorry, almost all of my clothes are dirty," Paige said apologetically, misinterpretating Emily's stare. "That's all I had left," she added, tugging on her t-shirt. "I guess I'll be on laundry duty for a week or so."

Emily giggled. "That's great," she said. "I mean, your clothes, not the laundry duty."

They grinned at each other, until Emily averted her eyes. She could feel herself blushing, and she berated herself internally for being so obvious. The sound of the doorbell saved her from further embarrassment.

"Pizza!" Emily exclaimed, a little too eagerly. She rushed to the front door, Paige's amused eyes on her.

* * *

Paige woke up with a start, and looked around her, feeling disoriented.

 _Where am I? Oh yeah, home._

She was lying on the living room couch, a blanket over her. Paige touched the warm and soft fabric and grinned _. Emily. She must have put this over me when I fell_ _asleep._ She smiled tenderly and looked around her, but Emily was nowhere in sight.

The last thing Paige remembered before falling asleep was seeing Emily seated in the armchair in front of her. They had talked quietly during dinner and afterwards -nothing major, just small talk- about Paige's journeys in Europe, and Emily's college life. They had carefully avoided the subject of their relationship, and their "status".

But Paige had given Emily her gift from Europe (a charm bracelet with six different charms, one for each country Paige had visited), and the auburn girl's heart swelled at the memory of Emily's reaction - a mix of surprise and delight.

Paige sat up and called out: "Em? Emily?..."

The house was silent. Paige sighed and stood up, stretching her arms.

 _I guess she left. I wonder how long I slept..._

Paige checked the watch on her left wrist. _Damn, it's nine thirty. Well, nine thirty here. I guess it's already dawn in Europe, then._

She yawned and looked around her. The room was in perfect order, Emily obviously having cleaned everything before leaving. Paige spotted a piece of paper on the coffee table with her name on it, and she grabbed it, her heart racing.

 _'Paige,'_ Emily had written _, 'It's late and I have to go. I have class early tomorrow. You're sleeping so peacefully, I didn't want to wake you. You need the rest; you must be exhausted, with the jet lag and all. By the way, check your cell phone. Someone named Natalie tried to reach you several times, from abroad, given the number. (PS: I wasn't trying to spy on you; I only picked up your phone to put it on mute). It was nice to see you again. Emily."_

Paige let the note slip from her hand. _'It was nice to see you again?_ ' she muttered in disbelief.

That could only mean one of two things. Either Emily had only meant to be polite, and the welcome-back dinner was simply a way to re-establish a casual friendship between them. Or, she had been hoping for more, and had freaked out when she saw the missed calls from another girl on Paige's cell phone.

Paige sighed deeply. _Damn it, Natalie. Your timing sucks. I guess I'll have to have a talk with Em about you_.

* * *

Early on Monday morning, Paige sent Emily a brief text: 'Em, please listen to KALX radio at 7.40 AM. Love, P.'

She had hesitated before typing the last word, but it was what she felt. And she had decided not to hide her feelings anymore. And you could totally send your love to your loved ones anyway, right?...

A little before 7.40, Paige tuned in to Berkeley's radio station and waited feverishly for the surprise she had planned. She had no way of knowing whether Emily was listening or not; she just hoped she was.

As scheduled, after a commercial break, the deejay announced: _'We normally don't do this, but now, here is a special dedication. The next song is for Emily, from Paige. Emily, Paige wants to thank you for yesterday and to tell you that she thought about you everyday when she was away. Awww girls, that's so sweet. So, here's the song. It's for you Emily! 'I run to you' by Lady Antebellum!'_

 _'I run from hate  
I run from prejudice  
I run from pessimists  
But I run too late  
I run my life  
Or is it running me  
Run from my past  
I run too fast  
Or too slow it seems  
When lies become the truth  
That's when I run to you _

_This world keeps spinning faster  
Into a new disaster so I run to you  
I run to you baby  
And when it all starts coming undone  
Baby you're the only one I run to  
I run to you...'_

Paige was softly humming the song, her eyes fixed on her cell phone. She had chosen the song for a reason! Lady Antebellum was her and Emily's favorite band. The two girls had listened to this very song countless times, and Paige even remembered them singing along 'I run to you' on the ride back from Lakeport, where they had spent a memorable weekend together, almost a year earlier.

Monday and Tuesday went by, and there was still no word from Emily. No phone call, no text at all. Paige was feeling more and more nervous; even distressed.

Being alone in the house wasn't helping. The silence was overwhelming. Before leaving for Nebraska, Nick McCullers had removed every framed picture of the family, every personal object that had belonged to his wife, probably presuming that doing so would help his daughter as she grieved.

But for Paige, it had the opposite effect. It was as if her father had wanted to erase every visual testimony of her mom. But the memories were everywhere in the house; Paige didn't need photos to make her think about her mom. Entering the kitchen, Paige would immediately recall the early morning breakfasts she had shared with her mother, when she was up at dawn for morning practise and Jennifer was back from her night shift. When Paige wandered in the small garden, her eyes would stop on the rose bush her mother had planted when Paige was thirteen. Paige had carefully avoided setting foot in her parents' room, though. It was beyond her strength, at least for now.

On Wednesday, Paige, acting on impulse, took BART (the Bay Area metro) and then a bus to Berkeley. It was a short ride, and when she reached the University area, it was still early in the afternoon.

She strolled around the campus, feeling almost like an intruder amid the flow of students. The atmosphere was rather different than in Stanford: There was a particular energy there, something that Paige couldn't describe yet but that she definitely liked.

It was a beautiful day, Spring was definitely in the air, and Paige bought a frozen yogurt and settled on the lawn to savor it. Around her, some students were studying, lying on the grass, their noses buried in a book or in their laptop. Others were chatting animatedly, or laughing while looking at their phones. No one was paying attention to Paige. Not that she minded at all; her thoughts were elsewhere, exclusively devoted to a certain raven-haired girl.

After an hour or so, she finally decided to head for Stern Hall, Emily's dorm. She didn't know her ex-girlfriend's room number, so she had to ask for it at the reception desk. The young man there, who was obviously a student, had seemed reluctant at first, but he eventually gave Paige the information she needed after what Hanna Marin would have had called 'a display of the famous McCullers charm'.

A couple of minutes later, Paige was knocking softly at Emily's door.

"It's open!" someone yelled from inside, but it wasn't Emily's voice. Frowning, Paige opened the door and stepped into the room.

A girl with long brown hair looked up at her from her desk. Emily's roommate, Paige assumed.

"Yes? Do I know you? What do you want?" the girl asked in a curt tone.

"Um, I'm here to see Emily Fields," Paige stammered.

The girl rolled her eyes. "Oh yes, obviously. I thought she was done with that."

"Done with what?" Paige asked, puzzled.

Emily's roommate shrugged. "With having her girlfriends showing up at the room at every hour."

Paige cringed. _Her girlfriends, plural? How many girls exactly_... she wondered, before chasing away the disturbing thought.

"Do you know when she'll be back? Can... can I wait for her here?" she asked, trying to not sound too desperate.

The other girl seemed to ponder her answer for a minute, before saying quite reluctantly, "Oh okay then, wait for her if you want to. I guess she'll be back soon anyway. But don't make any noise though. I have some work to do. I take my studies seriously, unlike some people," she added in a dry tone.

Paige nodded and sat on what she assumed was Emily's bed. The other girl was already back at her homework. Paige sighed and looked around her, her eyes stopping on a shelf that was above Emily's bed. There were a few books on it, and one of them looked oddly familiar.

Paige extended her arm and grabbed the book. A small smile spread over her face when she realized what book it was: 'The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter', a novel by Carson McCullers.

 _The book I gave Emily. My present to her when I left Rosewood. She kept it. She kept it next to her bed..._

Paige opened the novel and flipped through the first pages, looking for the few words she had written to Emily back then: 'Another McCullers you might like. This book changed my life. And Emily, don't forget: I love you.'

Paige stared at the book, her heart hammering in her chest.

 _It's still true. I still love her. But so much happened since. We were so happy then, so full of hope. So in love... Damn it, what happened?_

Paige knew the answer, of course, and it was painful and difficult to admit, even to herself. _Life happened. Things I could have controlled and even prevented from happening. Like when I cheated on Emily. And also some unforeseen, awful events, like when my mother died suddenly. I can't undo what happened. But I can try to fix what's broken..._

And right then, Paige's decision was made. She was going to win Emily back, even though she would have to fight hard for that.

* * *

Twenty minutes later, Emily Fields entered her dorm room, and stopped dead in her tracks. Her ex-girlfriend was seated on her bed, a smile on her face.

"Hey, Em," Paige said softly.

"Paige?" Emily said. "What are you..."

"Doing here?" her roommate cut her off sharply from her desk. "Waiting for you, obviously. Seriously Fields, if you and your girlfriends could meet else..."

"Oh cut the crap, Grace," Emily snapped at the girl. "Paige, why didn't you call first?"

Paige stood up, and tucked her hands in her jeans' pockets. Emily's tone wasn't harsh, but it wasn't exactly friendly either.

"Well," she said. "I wanted to surprise you, I guess. As you did for me last Sunday."

"But I'm _busy,_ Paige. You can't show up like that and expect..."

"Expect what? I don't expect anything, Emily," Paige said in a defensive tone. It wasn't true, but it was difficult to remain calm. Emily was literally glaring at her now, her eyes darker than usual.

"But you, you were clearly expecting someone else. One of your _girlfriends_ , maybe?" Paige said, raising her voice.

"Oh yeah? And what if I was? I owe you nothing, Paige. Not anymore. And by the way, who's _Natalie_?" Emily snapped.

"I... she is... that's not the point," Paige stammered, clearly taken aback by Emily's question.

Emily shook her head. "Unbelievable," she sneered between her teeth.

From the other side of the room, Grace let out a deep sigh.

"Oh please, you two. Spare me your lesbian drama. It's not even interesting."

"Fuck off, Grace," Emily barked. "Just go somewhere else if you don't want to hear this."

"This is my room too, and I'm working," Grace snapped back. "You and your girlfriend can leave if you want to fight."

"She's not my girlfriend, for goodness sake !" Emily burst out. "She's not..." her voice almost broke, and she turned around, her back to Paige. The auburn girl was staring at her, fighting tears, torn between anger and sadness.

After a moment of tense silence, Paige spoke again.

"You two can stay here in your room. I'm leaving. Sorry for the inconvenience, Emily," she said, the hurt obvious in her voice.

She rushed to the door, without waiting for an answer from Emily. Paige had almost reached the stairs when she heard rushed footsteps behind her.

"Paige!" Emily's voice called. "Paige, please, wait!"

Paige stopped her flight and turned back slowly.

Emily was looking at her with a pleading look. "Listen Paige, I'm sorry," she said. "I didn't intend to yell at you. But I was... caught off guard, I guess ."

"You were surprised, I get it," Paige said in a steady voice. "I understand. You're right, I should have called first. You have your own life here."

"Yeah, that's right, but..." Emily started. She ran a hand through her long dark hair and sighed deeply. _Why is it so difficult? Why do we always fight?_ And _why can't I tell Paige that my life is so much better when she's a part of it? A big part of it, actually._

Paige's big brown eyes were studying Emily.

"It's fine Emily. I totally understand why you can't trust me... anymore. I'm gonna leave now, okay? Give you some space. But you know what? This time, I won't run away. I'll be there for you, if you need me." _If you want me back._

"And just so you know, Natalie is just a friend. A girl I met when I was traveling in Europe. There's nothing between us, except a strong friendship," Paige explained. "She called yesterday because she wanted to check on me, that's all."

Emily sniffed, her throat tight. "Thanks, Paige. I... I'll call you later, okay?" she said in a hoarse voice. Paige simply nodded and left.

Emily went back to her room, and glared at Grace, who shrugged and rolled her eyes.

Emily didn't call Paige that night, but she sent her a text message: _'Paige, I'm sorry for earlier. You can show up at my room anytime you want, okay? I mean it. And, I did hear the song on the radio the other morning. Our song... I haven't forgotten, you know. Thank you, Paige. So much. Love, Em.'_

* * *

 **A/N: Yes, they're not "there" yet! Otherwise the story would be finished already... ;) by the way, I will update next week (chapter 10 will probably be posted on Friday as usual) but then I'm gonna take a break for the holidays. December is my favorite time of year! (Team!Emily! for Christmas...)**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Merry Christmas, everyone! And happy holidays!**

 **So, this is the last chapter... for 2016. ;)**

 **I will post next one early January (hopefully...).**

 **Once again, thank you so much _siophiefandom_ for the betareading! (and the awesome edits).**

 **Love you all!**

* * *

Emily woke up with a start at the sound of her cellphone ringing. The ringtone was distinctly Hanna's, a Beyoncé song that her blonde friend had chosen herself.

Sighing, Emily answered the call. "Hanna! Do I have to remind you that when it's 10 AM on the East coast, it's only 7 on the West coast? And it's Saturday!" she whined.

"Oh come on Fields," Hanna said, her voice perky. "The early mouse catches the worm!"

"That's rich, coming from you," Emily retorted. Hanna was anything but a morning person. "And for the record, it's the bird. Not the mouse," Emiy pointed out.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Quit channeling Hastings, Em. Are you fully awake now? 'Cause I've got great news."

Emily yawned. "Yeah, Han, I am. Thanks to you."

"You're welcome. Soooo, are you ready to hear the best news you've ever heard? For real?"

Emily couldn't help but giggle. Hanna's excitement was infectious. "Okay Hanna, shoot."

"I'm coming over to California!" Hanna yelled into the phone.

"What? When, why?" Emily asked, surprised.

"Long story short, I have a project to do for my final exam. And I need to do something big, you know? 'Cause my grades are, well, just below average for now. At first I really struggled, trying to find a subject, and then, bang! I had the best idea: what if I did something about Queer Fashion in California? More specifically, in San Francisco?"

"Um... is that even a subject?" Emily said with doubt in her tone.

"Emily, gal! Of course it is! And it also means that I have to be, well, on the ground, so to speak. Soooo, are you ready to be my own personal guide into gay San Fran?"

"Hanna, I would be delighted to have you here. But I'm not sure I'm the right person to, um, guide you in... whatever you have in mind. Besides, I have a hectic schedule. Between classes, swim practise and my job at the Café..."

"Emilyyyy," Hanna whined. "Are you saying that you don't have time for me at all? Don't you miss me?"

"Of course I do, Han. I miss you so much. I'm just saying, I won't be available all day, that's all."

"Of course not, Em. Don't worry, I will be as quiet as a mouse. Or is it a bird?"

"Mouse is fine, Hanna," Emily giggled, even though she had serious doubts about Hanna really being able to stay 'quiet'. "When are you coming? Do you need a place to stay?"

"Well, I'm coming next week, if it's okay with you, and yes, I definitely need to find a room. Do you think you could convince your roommate to, well, move out for a few days?"

Emily cringed. "Well, the problem is that Grace and I don't really get along, you know. We barely tolerate each other," she confessed.

"Oh yeah? What's the problem with her again?"

"Oh, basically she's just an uptight, judgemental bitch," Emily said, rolling her eyes. "At least she's not here this weekend. She is visiting her grandmother in Sacramento. But don't worry Han, I'll find you a place. How long are you staying?"

"Oh, I don't know yet, Em, maybe a week or so. I still have to buy my plane ticket. My mom offered to pay for it, but I don't want her to spend too much."

"Of course Hanna. Just call or text me when you have the details. Oh, we're gonna have so much fun!" Emily exclaimed. She had really missed having her friend around.

"Hell yeah!" Hanna agreed. "I can't wait either, Em. And sorry for waking you up."

"You're forgiven. You were right, this is great news. And I have to get up early today, anyway," Emily said.

"Why? Are you working today?"

"No, I..." Emily hesitated, before explaining: "...I'm seeing Paige today."

"Paige?" Hanna asked, grinning. "As in the infamous Paige McCullers? Are you two back together?"

"Hanna, no! Nothing like that. We're just... friends, I guess," Emily said.

"Um, 'friends'. And with or without benefits, Fields?"

"Hanna!" Emily protested.

"Gee Em, I'm just kidding. I know that your story is... complicated."

"Yes. It is. And now that we've declared a truce, we're just trying to... build back our friendship. That's all."

"Okay Em," Hanna said in a mischevious tone. "So tell me, what are you going to do today, you and Paige?"

"Well, she needs someone to monitor her swimming practises," Emily said. "You know, when she was traveling in Europe, she didn't have the opportunity to train properly. She really wants to go back to Stanford next semester, so I want to help her to get back on track," she explained.

"That's great, Em, and so nice of you," Hanna approved. "And by the way, I'd love to see Paige when I'm out there."

"Really?" Emily asked, surprised. Of all her friends, Hanna was the one that had been the angriest at Paige for cheating.

"Of course, Emily. I know I've been hard on her, but..." Hanna sighed, shaking her head slightly. "What she did was wrong, but well, if you've forgiven her, I guess I can do that too," Hanna concluded.

* * *

Paige and Emily had agreed to meet at the Frings' house. Paige was still on good terms with Shana Fring, her first girlfriend, who was off studying in New York. She had volunteered her private pool for Paige to use for training. The Frings were a wealthy family who lived in one of Oakland's well-off neighborhoods, far from The McCullerses' house, but close to Carson High School, where Paige and Shana had met as students.

Emily knew the place rather well; during her stay in Oakland, she had been invited, along with the rest of Rosewood High's swim team, to the Frings for a memorable goodbye party. It was the day before they flew back to Pennsylvania, and everyone was excited and nostalgic at the same time.

Emily and Paige didn't leave each other's side that night. They shared numerous kisses, and had even made out in one of the guest rooms, while the rest of the team was goofing around in the pool or in the garden. When Paige and Emily finally joined their teammates outside, they were greeted by catcalls and whistles, mainly orchestrated by Shana herself.

Emily couldn't help blushing as she recalled the memory _. It was a beautiful night. And we were so happy, so carefree._

It was odd, Emily thought, to be in the exact same place a year later, given how much things had changed between Paige and her in that year. It was... almost painful, too, she realized, while staring at the Frings' front door. _I'm not sure I can do that. Not yet._

The door opened, revealing a grinning Paige, whose smile faltered immediately at Emily's obvious discomfort.

"Hey Em," Paige said. "Are you.. are you okay?" she asked, frowning.

"Yes, I'm just..." Emily muttered, her eyes down.

"Did something happen?" Paige asked, concerned.

"No, it's..." Emily tightened her lips as she fought to keep a lid on the flood of emotions. "Listen Paige, I can't do this," she blurted out.

Paige stared at her, puzzled. "You can't do what?"

"This!" Emily almost yelled. " _This_. Especially here. At your ex-girlfriend's house, where we... Don't you understand, Paige?"

Paige's eyes widened as realization dawned on her.

"...I see," she said slowly. "I guess this wasn't a good idea after all."

"No, it wasn't!" Emily said vehemently. "Listen Paige, I'm okay with helping you with your training, but just... not here."

Paige dipped her head. "I understand. It's just that... I can't really train in Stanford, not anymore anyway, and it's not as if I'd be allowed to use the pool at Berkeley, right?..."

"I guess not," Emily said in a softer tone. "You're the competition, after all," she said in an attempt to lighten the mood. "I'm sorry, Paige. But I can't..."

"It's okay Emily. I get it. And it was kind of... stupid of me to ask you, I guess," Paige said. "I will find another place to train." _Or another training partner._

Her tone was even, but Emily could tell that Paige was hurt.

"Are we good?" the raven-haired girl asked softly.

"Yeah, of course we're good," Paige answered, a little bit too quickly. "Sorry for the inconvenience, Emily."

Emily sighed deeply and shook her head. "It's not..." she began, her frustration increasing. "Listen Paige, I'd better go now."

"Okay," Paige simply said.

"Okay," Emily repeated. "Bye then. I'll call you?" she added in a small voice.

"Yeah," Paige said with a forced smile. But both girls knew that they weren't going to reach out to each other that day.

Paige closed the door and leaned against it, her eyes closed. She let out a deep breath. _God McCullers, you're so dense sometimes_ , she groaned internally. _And who said it was gonna be easy?_

* * *

 _A week later_

"Hanna, how many luggages did you bring exactly?" Emily asked, rolling her eyes at her blonde friend who was smiling innocently at her. "I thought you were staying for a week, not a month," she teased.

They were in the airport at Oakland, near the baggage carousel, and Hanna's pile of bags was getting dangerously higher.

"Come on Em, a girl's gotta be prepared," Hanna said in a cheerfully.

"Prepared for what?" Emily giggled.

"Anything," Hanna said firmly, before bursting into laughter.

Emily beamed at her friend. "I'm so happy to have you here, Han," she said, before hugging her one more time.

"I am too, Em!" an excited Hanna said. "We're gonna have so much fun! I can't wait for you and McCullers to show me Gay San Fran!"

Emily's smile faltered a little, and she took a step back.

"About that," she said. "Well, I'm not sure..."

"You're not sure about what?" Hanna said, frowning. "Don't tell me that you and Paige are fighting again!" she added with a pout.

"No, not at all," Emily corrected. "We're not... fighting. It's just that... Well, for starters, I haven't told her that you were coming out."

"Oh," Hanna said. "And why is that, Fields?"

"Well," an embarrassed Emily said, "the last time Paige and I saw each other, it was a little... awkward," she explained.

Hanna raised a brow. "Awkward how? Was it too hard to deal with the sexual tension? 'Cause in that case, you two should simply get some, it's ea..."

"Hanna!" Emily squealed, her cheeks burning. "Please stop," she pleaded.

"Oh come on Fields. You're such a prude," Hanna retorted.

"I am not," Emily protested. "It's just that... the situation between Paige and me is..."

"Complicated, I know," Hanna said. "It's always complicated when we talk about the Paily situation, as Spencer calls it," she added, rolling her eyes.

"The... Paily situation?" a dumbfounded Emily asked. "And who is 'we', exactly? Are you guys talking about me and Paige behind our backs?"

"Sweetie, we - I mean the gang, Spence, Aria and I - only have your best interests at heart. And yes, we talk about you two. We care about you, you know."

"I know," Emily said.

"You're my best friend, Em," Hanna said. "And Paige is... ugh, I don't know what she is to me anymore, but I do know what she means to you."

Emily dipped her head. "How could you," she whispered. "when I myself don't know anymore..."

She felt Hanna's hand on her shoulder, and she looked up at her blonde friend.

"Are you really sure you don't know, Em?" Hanna asked gently.

Emily sighed and looked away. "Look Han," she said, "There's another suitcase that looks like yours on the carousel! The pink one with all the glitter!"

"Yep," Hanna confirmed with a big grin. "This one's mine too."

* * *

Paige woke up at the sound of her cellphone buzzing. She grabbed the offending device and smiled when she saw the name on the screen. Emily. They hadn't spoken to each other since their brief, awkward encounter at the Frings'. But, as always, the raven-haired girl hadn't left Paige's mind, or her dreams for that matter.

"Hi Em," Paige said in a raspy voice, before clearing her throat. "Sorry, I just got up."

"Oh, did I wake you? I didn't mean..." Emily stammered.

"No, it's fine," Paige assured her. She took a look at the time, and added: "wow, it's already nine anyway, I guess I overslept a bit! I usually get up much earlier, but..."

"Yes, I know. You're quite the early bird," Emily answered in a beat. "You were usually the one who woke me up," she said, before biting her bottom lip.

Things were still weird between them. Not tense anymore, but not comfortable yet. Their past relationship was still a delicate topic.

"...Yeah, I remember," Paige said softly, berating herself internally for not knowing what to say.

A silence settled between them, before Emily said: "Listen Paige, I don't have much time. I have class. But... I wanted to ask you something. Are you... are you free today?" she asked with uncertainty in her tone.

Paige felt her heart racing. "Yeah, absolutely. Why, do you want to hang out?" she said, trying not to sound to eager.

"Well, no, unfortunately, I can't. I told you, I have class," Emily answered.

"Oh," Paige said, disappointed. "I see. So, why do you..."

"Listen Paige," Emily cut her off, "I... I have a favor to ask."

"Anything, Emily."

"Don't say that before I tell you," Emily said with a small giggle. "It's a big favor. I need... I need you to chaperone Hanna."

At the other end of the line, Paige frowned. "Hanna? As in your Rosewood friend, Hanna Marin? And...'chaperone'?"

"Yes. That Hanna," Emily answered. "And yes, she definitely needs a... guide."

"But isn't she in New York? And... a guide for what exactly?"

"Well, usually, yes, she's in New York, but well, she's... here for a few days. And she'll tell you all about it, but she's got this project for her school, something about gay fashion in California through the ages..." Emily explained.

"Uh? What?" Paige was bewildered. "I'm not sure that I understand..."

"Neither do I," Emily retorded. "Well, you know Hanna. Anyway, she's here, and she needs someone to... I'm quoting her, to 'introduce her to gay San Fran'," she said, rolling her eyes.

"And... I'm this person?" Paige asked. "I'm not sure that I can..."

Emily sighed. "Listen Paige, forget that I asked. It wasn't a good idea."

"No, no!" Paige protested. "I'll do it, I will, Emily. What I meant was that... well, I'm not sure Hanna is my biggest fan right now."

"Well, she asked about you," Emily said. "She even said she'd love to see you again."

"Uh? Really?" Paige asked, the surprise obvious in her voice. The last time she'd heard from Hanna directly was the summer before, when the blonde girl had sent her an inflammatory email.

"Yeah. I know it's a lot to ask, Paige, but..." Emily said.

"I'll do it," Paige said again.

* * *

Paige McCullers was waiting for Hanna Marin at the intersection of Haight and Ashbury streets in San Francisco. Hanna had texted her to meet her there, because, as she had briefly explained, it was "where all started." What 'all' was, in Hanna's mind, Paige didn't know. From what Paige knew, Haight-Ashbury was mostly known as the central place of the famous 'Summer of Love' in 1967. It might have been a queer district during or after the hippie movement, Paige thought, but, these days, there were only tourists there, wandering around and taking pictures of the typical houses and the colorful shops.

Paige sighed and checked the time once again. Hanna was late. Just when she was about to send the blonde girl a text message, Paige heard her name called from the other side of the street. She looked up and saw Hanna waving at her. "McCullers!" Hanna yelled. "Get your ass over here, pronto!"

Paige crossed the street and approached the other girl cautiously. She still didn't know what to expect from Hanna. The blonde girl had taken off her sunglasses and was now staring at her, her big blue eyes more intense than ever.

Paige dipped her head. "Hi, Hanna," she whispered. She was feeling incredibly nervous, and could even feel her hands becoming sweaty.

Hanna tilted her head from side to side and groaned: "Oh come on, McCullers. Seriously."

The next thing Paige knew, Hanna was engulfing her in a bear hug. Paige squeaked and let out a small laugh of relief. "I was afraid you were going to hit me," she confessed.

Hanna released her grip and stared at Paige, her expression stern.

"Well, I thought about that," she said. "It was either a slap, or a hug. Or both."

"Yeah?" Paige said. "Well, I'm glad you went with the hug. Though you're surprinsingly strong, Marin."

"Oh yeah. I'm quite the beast. As you will learn firsthand if you ever hurt Emily again," Hanna said in a firm voice.

Paige nodded and looked down, her feelings of shame returning. "I know. And I understand," she said in a small voice. "But it won't happen anymore, Hanna."

"I hope not," Hanna said. "And, Paige..." she added in a softer tone.

"Yes?"

"I'm really, really sorry about your mom."

Paige nodded again, her throat tight. "Thanks, Hanna," she croaked.

She felt Hanna reaching for her hand and squezzing it briefly, and she smiled at the blonde girl. _She's really something, this one,_ Paige thought.

"So, Paigey!" Hanna resumed in a cheery voice. "Are you ready to be my guide?"

"Um, yes," Paige answered. "But just so you know, I'm not really into fashion."

"I know, Honey," Hanna said, rolling her eyes. "Look at you, with these faded blue-jeans and those old sneakers."

"What's wrong with them?" Paige frowned. "They're comfortable."

"Exactly. That's all they are. But fashion is not about comfort, it's about style," Hanna explained, motioning to her shiny Jimmy Choo high-heel shoes.

"Oh yeah?" Paige snorted. "Well, we'll see if you still say the same thing after a day of pacing up and down the streets of San Francisco. This city's got _hills_ , you know. And not the kind you like, I'm afraid."

* * *

A few hours later, much to Paige's amazement, Hanna was still bright and breezy. They had spent the afternoon in Haight Ashbury first, and then in the Castro district.

Paige had prepared a lists of places and points of interest that she thought were relevant to Hanna's assignment, but Hanna had stopped her short as soon as she started explaining about The Castro's turbulent history.

"Wow McCullers, don't go all Wikipedia on me," Hanna had exclaimed. "I have Hastings for that. No, I want to _feel_ the queer vibe of the city. That's why I'm here."

Paige had sighed deeply. "And how exactly are you going to _feel_ it?"

"I have my ways," Hanna said, grinning. "Let's start with a bit of shopping. You're right, I need some new shoes."

And now, a dozen fashion shops and concept stores later, Hanna was dragging an exhausted Paige behind her, along with numerous shopping bags.

"Hanna, please, can we take a break?" Paige whined after they exited another fashion shop on Noe Street.

Hanna rolled her eyes. "And you're supposed to be the athlete. Fine, Paigey. Let's take a break. Do you know a fancy café nearby?"

"Well," Paige said, "Not really, but there's this place where they have really great organic fruit and vegetable juices..."

Hanna made a face. "Organic fruits and vegetables? Now you're beginning to sound like Aria."

She winked at Paige, who was staring at her with a puzzled look on her face. "Oh, come on, McCullers. I was just kidding you. We'll go where you want. You've earned it."

* * *

"...So, Paige," Hanna started once they were settled at a table in a quiet corner of the small fruit juice parlor. "Let's talk seriously."

 _Here we go_ , Paige thought, sighing internally. She sipped a bit of her pineapple, orange and carrot juice, and peeked at Hanna, who was staring at her with a stern look on her face.

"What do you want to talk about, Hanna?" she asked, even though she thought she knew the answer.

"Well, for a start, how are you doing? I mean, really?" Hanna's tone was gentle, even caring.

The question, though simple, caught Paige off guard. The auburn girl had expected Hanna to confront her about Emily, about what happened between them. But Hanna seemed to be genuinely concerned about her.

"I... I'm okay, I guess," Paige stammered, dipping her head.

Hanna nodded, even though she wasn't convinced by Paige's answer.

"'Okay' is fine. For now," Hanna said simply. "You'll get through this." She patted Paige affectionately on the shoulder, and took a sip of her own fruit juice.

"Hey, it's actually good!" Hanna exclaimed. "Even with that... weird red thing in it."

"Beetroot," Paige said. "It's very good for the skin. Among other things."

"Cool," Hanna said. "Skin is the window to the soul."

"Actually, it's the eyes that... never mind," Paige said with a smirk. She had the feeling that Hanna had said that just to make her smile.

"...You're really something, Hanna Marin," Paige added, earning a giggle from Hanna.

"Well, look who's talking. The infamous Paige McCullers, who just came back from a trip around the world."

"Around Europe," Paige corrected.

"Still. Very impressive. Were you scared?" Hanna asked, keenly interested.

"Scared? No," Paige said, surprised. "No, not at all. I was curious, you know? I wanted to see other places, to... meet other people."

"And did you?"

"Yes, of course. I saw a lot of great places, and I even made some friends."

"Anyone special?" Hanna asked.

"What?"

"Did you make a... special friend?" Hanna said, her tone even.

Paige frowned. "Listen Hanna, if you are fishing for information... why don't you ask me directly?" she asked, her tone now defiant.

Hanna raised her hands in surrender.

"Wow, hold your horses, McCullers. I'm not judging you. A holiday fling would have been totally understandable. After all, it's not as if you and Em are together anymore."

Paige dipped her head. "Yeah..." she said in a soft voice. "Obviously. But just so you know, Hanna, there was no... holiday fling or whatever you call it."

"Okay," Hanna nodded. "That's good. Well, not good, but you know what I mean."

Paige let out a small laugh. "Well, I'm not sure I do. Anyway, I made a real friend while in France. Natalie. We even traveled together for a bit."

"Oh yeah?" Hanna asked. "A French girl then?"

"Yes and no, "Paige said. "Well, I mean, she's half French, half Australian. Actually, she grew up in Sydney with her dad. She was in Paris to visit her mother."

"How did you two meet?"

Paige smiled. "Well, that's rather funny actually. It was at a café in Paris, near Notre-Dame cathedral. She... she saved me from a crancky waiter who was yelling at me because I couldn't understand his French. Natalie basically told him to fuck off. In French, that is. And after that, she bought me coffee and croissants."

"She seems like a nice girl," Hanna said.

"She is," Paige approved. "And she is fluent in both French and English, of course. Though she has this weird Australian accent," she added.

"And you two traveled together for a while?"

"Yeah, we went to Czech Republic, and then to Germany. It was great, you know? - not to have to travel alone anymore," Paige said.

"Well, I'm glad you made a friend," Hanna approved. "You deserve to be happy, you know, Paigey. You're a good person."

Paige stared at the blonde girl with disbelief. "I'm not sure about that... and, well, you said otherwise in that email."

"Oh, yes, about that..." Hanna said sheepishly. "I'm sorry if I went a little overboard and if I called you... names back then."

Paige shrugged. "Well, it was a bit harsh, but I guess I deserved it."

"It's just, Emily is my best friend, you know. And you hurt her so badly," Hanna explained. "When Em called me from that swim camp last summer, she was crying so hard, and..." she stopped when she saw the look of hurt and shame in Paige's eyes. The auburn girl seemed to be fighting tears.

"I know," Paige said in a hoarse voice. "Believe me, I know."

"...Hey," Hanna said after a while. "I'm sorry I brought that up. Let's not talk about it for now, okay? It's nothing that can be fixed," she added in a soft tone.

"I'm not sure about that," Paige sighed.

"Paigey, Paigey, my friend. You need to be more positive. And you definitely need some fun-time."

"Oh yeah? What do you have in mind, Hanna?"

"Well, we're gonna start by buying you some new clothes," Hanna said firmly.

"Are you serious?" Paige exclaimed. "You want to go shopping again?"

"Absolutely. We need to do something about that jacket and those shoes," Hanna said in an animated tone. "And you definitely need a dress for tonight."

"A dress? Tonight? Why?" Paige asked, alarmed.

"Well, girlfriend, we're partying tonight!" Hanna said cheerfully.

"Really? We are? " Paige asked, taken aback. "Wait, who's we, exactly?"

"Duh! You, me and Emily, of course!" Hanna said as she were talking to a five-year-old. "Tell me, what's the best gay club in San Fran, Paigey?"

"Uh... I don't know?" Paige said, her eyes wide.

"Seriously, McCullers! Get a grip! Well, you have till tonight to find out."

Paige stared at Hanna and sighed deeply _. I guess she's serious._

"Okay," she said reluctantly. "I'll call Shana. It's the kind of things she would know."

"Yeah, ask your ex-ex-girfriend to find the perfect place to untertain your ex-girfriend. No wonder you're still single, McCullers," Hanna said, rolling her eyes.

* * *

 **A/N: So, let me know what you think... And once again: Merry Christmas, and an early happy New Year!** **Take care.**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Happy New Year everyone! I hope you guys all made it safe to 2017. I wish you all the best, for you and your loved ones...**

 **Let's hope for more peace in the world, more joy in our hearts and more Paily on our screens!... (what do you mean I'm asking for too much?... ;))**

 **I can't promise weekly updates, because January is usually a very busy month for me. But I won't abandon this story (if you've read my other fics, you've seen that I don't like to leave them unfinished).**

 **There have been less views, reviews etc... to the last chapter, but I hope it was just because you guys were all busy with Christmas and all, and not because you lost interest in the story...**

 **Anyway, let me know what you think. Maybe the pace is too slow, or the story boring. Don't be afraid to tell me, I'm open to suggestions. Any feedback is really important for me! (as for every writer, I guess).**

 **One more thing: thank you so much** _ **siophiefandom**_ **for the betareading, as always! You're the best (...and I can't wait for your new story in February! Yay!)**

* * *

 _ **Present day**_

 _ **Berkeley (Emily) - UPenn (Spencer)**_

"...Don't take this the wrong way, Emily, but... do you know what you really want?" Spencer asked cautiously. She had listened patiently as Emily ranted over and over on the phone about her complicated relationship with Paige.

"I just don't know where we stand now, Spencer", Emily complained on the other end of the line. "Are we back to being just friends? Are we... ex-lovers who fought and then declared a truce, or are we... I don't know anymore."

Spencer sighed. "You're not listening, Emily. I'm not asking you what you know, but what you want."

"But that's the thing, Spencer! I don't know what I want!" a frustrated Emily exclaimed.

"And do you know what _she_ wants?"

"Paige? No. You know her, Spence, she's not the one to speak openly about her... feelings. And given our history... I guess she's being cautious."

"Well," Spencer observed. "You can't blame her for that."

"I suppose not," Emily sighed.

"From what you told me, there are still some... hard feelings," Spencer said.

"What? No, Spencer, I don't think so. We've hurt each other in the past, it's true, but now... we're good," Emily said.

"Are you sure?" Spencer asked softly. "You know, maybe you two should talk about all this. I mean, really talk. Instead of constantly beating around the bush ."

Emily rolled her eyes. "That's not what we're doing."

"Really? Seriously, Emily. You and Paige should... put everything on the table, once and for all."

Emily sighed deeply. "I don't know, Spence," she said. "Thing were so tense between us for a while. I don't want to go back there. And I guess I don't want to... I don't want to lose her again."

"I don't think you will, Em," Spencer said softly. "Paige still loves you."

Emily's heart skipped a beat. "Has she... has she told you that?" she asked in a hopeful voice. She knew that Spencer and Paige talked on the phone rather often.

"Not directly. But believe me, Emily, I can tell. And I know that you won't lose her, " Spencer assured.

"I hope you're right," Emily whispered. "And you know what, Spence? Hanna agrees with you on that."

"Wow, that's a first," Spencer said, rolling her eyes. "How is our favorite New York gal, by the way?"

"She's fine," Emily smiled. "Full of energy, as always. She's actually spending the day with Paige in San Francisco. 'Doing research for her project', as she put it. But from what I can tell based on Paige's text messages, 'research' mostly means shopping. Apparently, she even managed to convince Paige to buy some new clothes."

"No way," Spencer scoffed. "And McCullers agreed to that?"

"Well, it's not as if she had any choice," Emily observed. "You know Hanna."

"Oh yeah," Spencer chuckled. "And I wish I could be there to see that. That must be interesting."

* * *

 _ **San Francisco**_

 _ **Honey Bees nightclub and bar**_

"I can't believe I've never been to a gay bar before," an excited Hanna exclaimed. "It's awesome! You guys really know how to party! And I love those pink drinks. What are they called?"

"Um, I don't know. Pink drinks?" Paige said, earning a small giggle from Emily.

Hanna rolled her eyes at her friends. "Very funny, you two. Make fun of the straight girl. Whatever it's called, I'm gonna have another one," Hanna said, before making a beeline to the bar.

Emily peeked at Paige, who was fidgeting in her seat, looking uncomfortable.

"This dress is too short," the auburn girl mumbled. She was wearing a black body-conscious dress that Hanna had pushed her to buy.

"Well," Emily observed, "I think it really suits you. And I'm not the only one, judging by the glances you've earned since we got here."

Paige's eyes widened. "Really? Me? No, I don't think so, Emily. Those girls were staring at _you_. And seriously, who could blame them?" she said, motioning to her ex-girlfriend, who was wearing a tight blue low-cut dress with matching high heels.

"You look... absolutely stunning, Em," Paige added, blushing slightly.

"Thanks," Emily said with her signature full-dimpled smile. "I was wondering if it was... too much, you know? But Hanna insisted. She did my hair, too," she said, running her hand through her silky black locks.

Paige nodded approvingly. "Well, she did a beautiful job. That's beautiful...You're beautiful." _And way to go with the lack of vocabulary, McCullers. Damn, why am I so nervous?..._

Emily was also staring at Paige, an amused half-smile on her lips.

"You know..." she began, but she was cut short by the arrival of a tall brunette who leaned toward Paige and said with a seductive smirk: "Hey gorgeous, wanna dance?"

"Well, um," a startled Paige stammered. "No, I... I mean, no thank you."

The tall brunette shrugged. "Okay. Your loss. What about you, babe?" she said, winking at Emily.

"Wait, you ask her and then me?" Emily said, frowning.

The girl snorted. "Why, did you want me to ask you first?"

"No!" Emily said indignantly. "I mean, did it cross your mind that maybe we are... together?"

"Oh! You are?" the brunette asked, surprised. "Sorry then. But your friend, the blonde one, she said that you were both single, and available," she explained.

"Well, we're not," Emily said firmly, before taking Paige's hand in hers.

The other girl shrugged and turned away.

Emily glanced at Paige, who was now staring at her with a puzzled look.

"Sorry," Emily stammered, before letting go of Paige's hand.

"So we're together, uh?" Paige asked, grinning.

"No, I meant... sorry if I overreacted," Emily said, dipping her head.

"You didn't," Paige said fondly. "But... what if I wanted to dance with her?"

Emily stared at Paige, a look of disbelief on her face. "...You did?"

Paige let out a small giggle. "Not really. Not at all, as a matter of fact."

Her eyes were sparkling, and Emily, relieved, smiled back at her.

"Well, it's probably selfish of me, but I'm glad you didn't say yes," she said.

Paige beamed at Emily, and was about to speak again when another stranger, a petite Black woman with expressive brown eyes, interrupted their moment.

"Can I buy you a drink?" she asked Emily. "Your friend over there said you were feeling lonely."

Emily's angry eyes scanned the crowded room and stopped on Hanna, who was sipping her pink drink at the bar, an innocent look plastered on her face.

Hanna gave Emily a small wave, and immediately turned around to chat with the bartender, who seemed to be the only guy in sight.

"Unbelievable," Emily said between her teeth. "I'm gonna kill you, Hanna Marin. Slowly, and painfully."

"What?" the petite girl said, looking slightly worried. "Are you a psycho, or what?"

"Yes, she is," Paige barged in. "And she was just released from jail. I'm her therapist. This is part of the reorientation process. And we're dating each other, by the way."

The girl stared at them, her mouth wide open. "You're... you're both crazy," she said, shaking her head, before leaving as fast as she could.

Paige and Emily looked at each other and burst into small giggles, which escalated quickly into full-out laughter. Emily even had to wipe some tears from her eyes.

When they stopped laughing, Paige dipped her head, and whispered: "It's so good, to have fun again. Especially with you, Em."

"Yeah," Emily agreed. "We've always made a good team," she said.

Paige stared at her, her big brown eyes more intense than ever. "We still can, if you want to," she said softly, her heart hammering in her chest.

Emily fidgeted in her seat and looked away, looking uncomfortable.

"Paige, I don't think we can go back to where, or what, we were," she said.

"I... I know that, Em," Paige stammered. "It's just... I was hoping..."

"Paige, please... we're having a good time, right? So, let's stick with that, okay?" Emily asked, more dryly than she intended.  
Paige just nodded, her throat tight.

A awkward silence fell between them, and broken only by Hanna's return. The bubbly blonde was carrying three beers in her hands.

"Sooo, guys," she slurred. "What's with the long faces? Just a minute ago, you were giggling like schoolgirls."

"Hanna, please," Emily said in a stern voice.

"What? Oh, come on, Emily, chill. You too, Paigey. What the heck did you tell her, Em? She looks like a sad puppy now."

"Hanna!" Emily almost barked. "Stop talking. And stop... sending over poor, unsuspecting girls."

Hanna glared at her best friend, her baby blue eyes wide with feign innocence.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Fields."

"Hanna. It's not fair. It's not even funny," Emily snapped.

"Oh, really?" Hanna retorded. "Because from what I saw, you really seemed to be enjoying yourself, you and..." she said, turning her eyes to her left before frowning. "Hey, where's Paige?..."

Emily looked around her, her heart racing. "She's gone," she said. "Hanna, she left," she stammered.

Hanna shook her head. "No, Emily. No. That's enough."

"What.. what do you mean?" Emily asked.

"Stay right here, Em. I'll bring her back. She can't be very far anyway," Hanna said firmly, before leaving the table.

* * *

Paige was in the club's bathroom, staring blankly in front of her. She sighed when she saw Hanna's reflection in the mirror, and she turned around to face the blonde girl.

"McCullers," Hanna said in a stern tone. "Do you like being unhappy?"

Paige stared at her, puzzled. "What?" she said. "No, Hanna. Of course not."

"Are you sure?" Hanna asked. "Because seriously, you and Em are so... arrgh," she said in a frustrated tone.

"We are so what?" Paige frowned.

"You're so... frustrating. And stupid. Yes, stupid, McCullers. You with your guilt, and Emily with her damned pride."

"Hanna, it's..." Paige started.

"Oh please, don't say 'it's complicated'," Hanna cut her off, rolling her eyes.

"I was gonna say, it's not that simple," Paige said with a half-smile.

"Of course it's not," Hanna said, much to Paige's surprise. "I'm not dumb, you know, Paige. I wasn't expecting you two to act all lovey-dovey all of a sudden, just because we go to a gay bar and I get you both drunk."

"You wanted us to get drunk?" Paige asked, raising a brow.

"Well, maybe not drunk, but a little tipsy, yes," Hanna grinned. "Though it would be better if one of us actually stays sober, I guess. We drove here, didn't we?"

"Yeah," Paige said. "And I'm okay with being the designated driver, if that's what you're asking."

"No," Hanna said.

"No?" Paige asked, frowning.

"No," Hanna confirmed. "I will be the designated driver. See, I'm even willing to sacrifice my Pink Drinks if only you and Em, well, relax and even loosen up a little."

"Hanna, I don't think..." Paige began.

"Stop thinking, McCullers. That's your problem. You think too much. 'What did I do, what am I doing, what am I going to do next...'" Hanna listed, rolling her eyes. "Especially when it comes to Emily Fields," she added.

"I don't..." Paige huffed, before sighing. "Okay Hanna, maybe that _is_ what I do, but..."

"But nothing. Listen Paige, just try to enjoy your night for once, okay? You're with the best gals in town, after all," Hanna joked. "Whatever happened between you and Emily in the past... is the past. And whatever happens next... is up to you and Em. Okay?"

Paige nodded. _Maybe Hanna's right, after all_.

"So, are you ready to drink, to dance, even sing if you want to, and do whatever you lesbians do when you want to have fun?" Hanna challenged.

"...Okay," Paige said, a small smile on her lips. "I think so."

"Great! Come on Paigey, let's go back to your girl now. Yeah, yeah, I know, she's not your girl anymore. But well, you know what I mean. And the night is still young," Hanna said, before grabbing Paige's hand and dragging her outside the bathroom.

* * *

Two hours later, and after a load of Tequila shots, the atmosphere was totally relaxed between Emily and Paige, much to Hanna's delight.

The three girls had made it to the dance floor, which was already crowded, and even though Paige had whined that she didn't like the music at all, they had fun, dancing and fooling around together. They earned admiring and amused glances from the other dancers, and Hanna even got some pink drinks from the bartender.

She politely declined them; she wanted to stay sober to be able to drive back.

And it was definitely funny, Hanna thought, to watch Emily, who was a clingy drunk, getting more and more flirty with Paige.

Paige, on the other hand, was rather tipsy, but still conscious of her actions and her words. So when Emily clung onto her neck and whispered in her hear "do you want to go somewhere else, sexy?", the auburn girl leaned back and said gently: "I'm flattered, Em, but I think we should head to bed now."

"Oh yeah, bed! Great idea! Let's go to bed together," Emily exclaimed, earning some loud giggles from Hanna. Paige glared at the blonde girl, and turned back to Emily.

"No, Em," she said in a patient tone. "Not together. Just you. Hanna is going to drive you back to your dorm in Berkeley."

"Riiiiight, Berkeley. That's where I live, I think. But... what about you?" Emily said with a pout.

"Well, I'm gonna take a cab to Oakland," Paige said. "I can't really drive right now."

"Yeah, but what about your caaaar?" Emily asked, a little too loud.

Paige frowned. "Well," she said again, "I guess I'll have to come back tomorrow to get it back. Don't worry about that now, Em."

"You're soooo smart, and so sweet, Paige. And beautiful, too," Emily stuttered. "Isn't she beautiful, Han?" she asked, nudging her friend.

Hanna grinned. "Yeah, she's a real catch, Em. Though she sucks at dancing."

"Hey!" Paige protested. "I'm right here, Hanna! And I'm a good dancer!"

"I know, McCullers," Hanna retorted. "I'm just teasing you. But you're right about Em. We'd better get her to bed soon... before she does something to you that I don't really want to see."

"Very funny, Marin," Paige huffed. "Now, please, help me with her. Do you remember where she parked her car?"

"Not at all," Hanna admitted. "I never pay attention to those things. Em," she said, "Do you know where you parked?"

Emily frowned in concentration. "...I think it was outside," she said after a while.

Paige sighed, and slid her arm under Emily's shoulders. Hanna, who was trying not to laugh too openly, grabbed Emily's arm, and the three girls headed to the exit.

* * *

Not surprisingly, Emily woke up with a hangover, and a headache. She blinked and looked around her, quickly realizing that she wasn't in her room in Berkeley. She was at the McCullerses'. More specifically, in Paige's room. In Paige's bed.

Panicked, Emily sat up, her heart racing. She didn't remember much about the night before - and certainly not falling asleep in Paige's bed.

The auburn girl was nowhere in sight, though, and Emily began to relax a little.

 _I would remember, if something had happened, right_? she asked herself. _I was drunk, okay, but Paige would never take advantage of me. Besides, I'm still wearing clothes. Wait... these areb't my clothes_ , Emily realized with a start.

She was wearing a loose baseball t-shirt over her underwear, and her dress from the night before was neatly folded on a chair beside the bed, near her high-heel shoes.

Emily ran a hand through her messy hair, and sighed. _I will never get drunk again,_ she thought, even though she knew she wouldn't keep that promise.

She heard a muffled sound from downstairs, and she got up, wincing slightly at the pain in her temples.

Emily exited the room and reached her way over to the stairs, slowly making her way down to the kitchen.

Paige was there, obviously busy cooking something on the stove. She turned around when she heard Emily entering the kitchen.

"Oh, hi, Em," she said with a broad smile. "Do you want some pancakes?"

Emily stared at her, a wrinkle in her forehead.

"Paige," she said. "What... what am I doing here?"

Paige raised her eyebrows. "You don't remember at all?" she said, her smile fading when she caught sight of the worried look in Emily's eyes.

"What happened?" Emily asked again. "Why was I in your bed?"

Paige took a step forward, and raised a calming hand.

"Emily. It's okay. Nothing happened. We couldn't find your car last night, so Hanna drove mine, and instead of going back to Berkeley, we decided to crash here."

"Where's Hanna?" Emily asked.

"On the living room couch. Sound asleep. And I slept in the attic," Paige explained.

"Oh," Emily said, the relief obvious on her face. "I see."

"Hanna helped me to get you to bed," Paige clarified.

"She... helped you to get me out of my dress, too?" Emily asked.

Paige shrugged, a slight blush on her cheeks. "Well, yeah. We thought you would feel more comfortable in... I mean, out of your dress. Hence the t-shirt," she added.

"Hence the t-shirt," Emily repeated with a small grin. "Nice shirt, by the way."

"The Oalkland A's", Paige said proudly. "Best baseball team ever."

"Oh yeah?" Emily said, raising a brow. "What about the Phillies, then?"

"Amateurs," Paige answered promptly.

Emily shook her head, feigning indignation, but her eyes were smiling.

"...You know," she said, "I'm gonna keep this shirt. You will never get it back, McCullers."

"Okay, Em," Paige said, a smug smile on her lips. "Keep it. It really looks good on you, anyway, Fields... even in that fuzzy state of yours," she added with a wink.

Emily rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah. Whatever. And how come you look so perky yourself after last night, by the way?"

"Well, I've always handled my alcohol better than you do, Em," Paige retorted.

Emily rolled her eyes. "Riiight, I give you that, McCullers," she conceded.

She was trying to act nonchalant, but her heart was swelling with joy and hope. She hadn't felt like that in a long time - it reminded her of the early stages of her relationship with Paige, back in Rosewood, and during her stay in Oakland. _When everything were simpler, more fun. And when you were mine._

"What?" Paige asked, and Emily realized that she had thought out loud.

"Nothing," Emily blurted out, her cheeks flushed. "It's ...that song, you know, the one by Lady Antebellum?... 'When you were mine'. I... I can't get it out of my head."

Paige nodded, biting a smile. "Yeah. Nice song."

"Very nice," Emily confirmed.

"Not really the kind of music we heard yesterday in that club, though," Paige observed.

"Yeah," Emily said. "It was nice, but... it lacked slow songs."

"My thoughts exactly," Paige said, smiling softly.

She took a step forward, her heart racing in her chest, and took Emily's hand in hers. "Em, I..." she whispered. "Do you mind if..."

She was about to ask Emily whether she could kiss her, but just then, Hanna entered the kitchen. "Hi guys," she said, yawning. "Do I smell pancakes?..."

* * *

Hanna and Emily spent the rest of their Saturday morning at the McCullerses'. It wasn't planned; It was as if neither girl wanted to leave.

And Paige was more than happy to have some company. Especially Emily's, of course. But, after their moment in the kitchen was interrupted by an oblivious Hanna, Paige and Emily behaved as if nothing had happened.

And, technically, nothing had happened, but both girls knew that they had taken a step in the right direction.

Paige felt lighter that she had felt in months. And for the first time since her breakup with Emily, she felt hope again. _Maybe sometimes, things do work out_ _after all._

* * *

 _ **A/N: Yes, yes, I know! Hanna has the worst timing ever! ;)**_


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Guys. You're amazing. Thank you so much for the reviews, and for the kind words. I was starting to have second thoughts about this story, and your support and feedback really helped me.**

 **As you can see, I was able to post on Friday, once again (a big thank you for that to my betareader, _siophiefandom_!) ;)**

 **A special hello to the new readers (welcome!) and of course a big thank you to those of you who review every chapter.**

* * *

On Sunday afternoon, Paige had just finished her swim practise at the Frings' private pool in Oakland (Shana's parents were away, but had given Paige a key to their pool house) when she got a call from Hanna. She didn't recognize her friend's voice at first; Hanna seemed to be pretty upset, far from her usual bubbly self.

"Hanna, what's wrong?" a worried Paige asked while wrapping herself in a towel. "Is Emily with you?"

"Yes... we were together when... when it happened," Hanna answered.

"What? When what happened?" Paige almost yelled, fearing the worst. "Are you two okay? Please, Hanna, tell me!"

"We're fine, Paige, I mean not fine but... listen, we had a little car accident."

"An accident?" Paige asked in a croaked voice, her heart hammering in her chest.

"Yes, but Paige, it's not too bad. I mean, Emily's car is pretty much destroyed, but Em's okay, apart from the concussion, of course. But the doctors think that she..."

"The... the concussion?" Paige cut Hanna off. "She's hurt? Emily's hurt?"

"No, not badly, Paige, but the airbag knocked her head back into the seat when it deployed, and Em was basically knocked out at first. But she seems to be quite okay now, according to the nurse I just saw," Hanna explained.

"What about you? Are you okay?"

"Yes. I'm a bit shaken, of course. I don't have any injuries though, just a few small bruises. The police officers said that we were very lucky, considering the state of the car, and..."

"Where are you?" Paige urged. "What hospital?"

"We're at Alta Bates Summit Medical Center," Hanna said. "It's in Berkeley, not far away from the campus..."

"I know the place," Paige said. "Stay right there with Em, Hanna, I'm on my way!"

She hung up the phone without even waiting for Hanna's anwer.

* * *

Thirty minutes later, Paige barged through the hospital's doors and rushed to the front desk. "Emily Fields and Hanna Marin, please?" she asked in an out-of-breath voice.

The male nurse at the front desk glanced at the visibly stressed girl and gave her a reassuring smile. "Just a second, please, Miss," he said, his eyes turning to his computer screen. "...Okay, so Miss Marin is in the ER waiting room, and Miss Fields is in radiology right now."

"Radiology? Wait, that's bad, right? I thought Emily was okay," Paige said in a shaky voice. Her hands were clutching the desk and her face was as pale as a ghost.

"Miss, relax. Everything's gonna be fine. Do you want to sit down?" the nurse asked.

"No!" Paige almost yelled. "I don't need to sit down! I need to see Emily, now!"

The man stood up, and put a calming but firm hand on Paige's shoulder.

"Miss, please lower your voice. We're in a hospital. I understand that you're upset, but your friends are fine."

He motioned to a young woman in scrubs. "Lena, can you take this young lady to the ER waiting room? Her friend's there."

The woman nodded, and gently smiled at Paige, who mumbled an apologetic "thank you" to the man at the desk.

* * *

Hanna stood up when she saw Paige rushing towards her, her face pale and strained with worry.

"Hanna, are... are you okay? And where's Emily? Where is she?"

"Paige. Breathe. I'm perfectly fine, as you can see. And Emily is okay too, as I told you on the phone. They're just checking her vision and hearing," the blonde girl explained.

"But why?" Paige asked anxiously. "If she's okay, why do they have to... Or is she... are you lying to me, Hanna?"

"Paige, relax. Why don't we sit first?" Hanna said softly. She tugged on Paige's arm to make the auburn girl sit down.

But Paige took a step backward, and shook her head.

"No, no," she said stubbornly. "Don't tell me to sit down. That's what doctors say to the family when a patient is in critical condition, or when..." she said, her voice faltering.

"McCullers!" Hanna said, raising her voice. "Stop that! I'm not lying to you. Emily is fine, she's not gonna die, or... whatever horrible thing is going through your mind right now. I swear!"

"Really?"

"Really, Paige. Jesus! You're as pale as a ghost. Do you want a glass of water, or something to eat?" Hanna asked.

Paige let herself fall onto the nearest seat. She put her head in her hands and breathed deeply. Hanna was staring at her, concerned.

"...Sorry, Hanna," Paige said taking a deep breath. "It's just... I don't know, when you called, I... I panicked."

"But Paige, I told you it was practically nothing. I'm sorry I worried you so much, it's just that I don't know nobody here besides you, and... I didn't know who else to call," Hanna explained.

"Hanna, please don't be sorry. I'm glad you called me. And I'm so relieved to learn that you're both okay. But what happened? You said Emily's car was destroyed..."

"Well, not completely destroyed, but it sure won't work anymore," the blonde girl said with a shrug.

"What happened exactly?" Paige asked.

"Well, we were in Em's car, just outside the campus, Em was driving, and we were chatting, nothing special, as usual. We stopped for a traffic light, of course, but that guy behind our car didn't. He was driving rather fast, that's why the impact was... well, the back of Em's car is totally wrecked, and the doctors said the airbags probably saved us from being seriously injured. "

"Oh god," Paige said in a weak voice. "And Emily's got a concussion?"

"Oh, a small one. Very minor," Hanna said in the most reassuring voice she could muster.

Paige glared at her. "Hanna, my mother was a nurse. I know for a fact that a concussion can be pretty serious."

"Well, Emily's is not. According to her doctors."

"Doctors? She has more than one doctor? So, that must be bad then?" Paige frowned.

Hanna sighed deeply. "There she goes again. Gee, Paigey, I'm glad you didn't choose a medical career. You would scare the patients to their bones. And their families too."

Against all odds, and much to Hanna's relief, Paige let out a small laugh.

"You're probably, right, Han."

Hanna took a seat near the auburn girl and patted her knee.

"You're feeling better now?"

"Yes, Hanna. Sorry, I should be the one comforting you," Paige said sheepishly.

Hanna shook her head and smiled. "It's okay, Paigey. I get it. You were scared for your girl."

Paige raised a eyebrow and said: "Well, she's not my girl anymore, you know."

"For now. But we're working on it, aren't we?" Hanna retorted, winking at Paige.

"Oh yeah? We? So, you're team Paige now?" Paige asked with a half-smile.

"Honey, I'm team Paily. Always have been," Hanna corrected, and Paige's smile widened at that statement.

* * *

A few minutes later, Emily emerged from the elevator and slowly walked to her two friends, who were staring at her anxiously. Emily was wearing a neck brace, and though she was smiling, she couldn't hide the bruise on her face, near her left brow bone.

"Emily," Paige said in a croaked voice. "How are you feeling? Are you hurt? And why do you have to wear that? I thought everything was okay," she said, before turning accusing eyes towards Hanna.

"Hey, I'm not a doctor," Hanna protested. "Em please, tell us that you're gonna be fine. McCullers here is freaking out big time."

"I'm not..." Paige muttered, before shooting an apologetic look at Emily. "I was so worried..." she whispered.

Emily reached for Paige's hand, and squezzed it lightly, before letting it go. "I understand, Paige," she said softly. "And I'm fine. It looks worse than it is, really."

"Yeah?" Paige asked in a small voice.

"Yeah," Emily confirmed. "I just have to wear this, uh, ugly neck brace, for a day or two. And I have a small headache, but nothing that some painkillers won't solve."

"You're so brave," Paige said. "When Hanna called, I was so afraid..."

Emily frowned at Hanna. "Han, what did you tell her?"

"Nothing but the truth!" Hanna protested. "That we were in a car accident, but it was nothing too bad, and that you were being examined. That's all, Em."

Emily nodded, as much as the neck brace allowed her to. The small wince on her face, though, wasn't lost on Paige, who frowned in concern.

"Are you really okay, Em? You seem sore. Maybe it would be better if they kept you for the night?"

"Certainly not!" Emily protested. "I don't want to spend the night in a hospital. Besides, they told me I could go back home, as long as I have someone to keep an eye on me overnight."

She glanced at Hanna, who nodded eargerly. "Of course Em. I'll be your monitor. Will I have to wake you every hour or something like that? Oh, I'd love that!"

"I don't think so," Emily smiled, rolling her eyes. "But the doctors wrote everything down, if you want to read it," she said, handing a note to her blonde friend.

Paige was suddenly silent, her eyes down. Emily approached her and whispered: "Hey, you okay?"

Paige gave her a weak smile. "Yes, I'm... I'm relieved to see that you're good. But Em..."

"Yeah?"

"...Nothing," Paige said after a moment. She smiled at Emily. She felt a little hurt that Emily hadn't asked _her_ to watch her overnight; it was something she would have done in a heartbeat.

"I'm gonna drive you both back to campus, okay?" Paige offered. "And I'll make sure that you're both settled in."

"Paige, you don't have to do that," Emily began. "We can call a taxi..."

"Emily, please. It's the least I can do," Paige cut her off firmly.

"Okay then," Emily said, smiling.

Hanna was staring at the two girls, a slight frown on her face. _Well_ , she thought, _Spencer was right, about those two. There's still some work to do... but we'll get there._

"We'll get there," Hanna said out loud in a firm voice.

"What?" Emily asked, puzzled. "Get where?"

Hanna grinned at her childhood friend. "To campus, of course, doofus. Hey, check out the rhyme!" she exclaimed, earning an eye roll from Emily.

"Okay Paigey, let's get to your car now. I hope you're a careful driver! One accident a day is enough!" Hanna said before shoving Paige's shoulder playfully.

* * *

The following Thursday, when Emily exited the Blue Bird Café at the end of her evening shift, she heard her name called from the parking lot accross the road. Paige was there, standing next to the Blue Corolla her father had lent her when he left for Nebraska.

"Paige?" Emily asked, surprised, before crossing the road. "What are you doing here so late?" she asked.

Paige shrugged. "Waiting for you, of course, Fields," she said. "I was in the neighborhood, so I thought I'd give you a ride."

Emily bit a smile. "A ride, uh?" she asked. "And how come you were in this neighborhood at this time of night?"

Paige blushed and looked at the pavement.

"What can I say," she mumbled. "I'm a night owl."

"No, that's me," Emily smiled fondly. "You're an early bird."

"Well, I can be both," Paige retorted.

"I don't think so, Paige," Emily said, her eyes shining in amusement. "But still, that's very nice of you. I was heading to BART, but..."

"There's no way I'm letting you get on public transportation at this time of night, Emily," Paige said firmly. "I'm not letting you go home by yourself. At least not until you get your car back."

"Okay then," Emily beamed. "But you know, it might be a while. Given the state of the car..."

"No big deal," Paige assured her. She was determined to be there every Thursday night, waiting for Emily after her evening shift at the Blue Bird Café. And from what she could decipher on Emily's face, her ex didn't seem to mind at all.

"...So," Paige started once they were both settled in the car. "How was your shift? No neck or shoulder pain anymore?"

Emily smiled. "No. I'm a little sore maybe, but that happens after every shift."

Paige frowned. "Sore? How sore? Did you carry some heavy trays or something like that? Maybe you came back to work too early..."

"Paige, last time I checked, you weren't my doctor," Emily said, rolling her eyes. "I meant my _feet_ are sore. But you know, that's totally normal for a waitress. It's kinda part of the job description," she joked.

Paige didn't look convinced. "Still, Em," she grumbled. "I think it's too early. You need some rest. And with finals coming up..."

"Speaking of that," Emily cut her off. "I know we made plans for next Saturday, but I won't be able to help you train. When Hanna was here, I didn't study as much as I intended to. I have some catching up to do, especially in Chemistry."

"I could help you with that," Paige said eargerly. "I was pretty good at Chemistry in high school."

"Yes, but we're not in high school anymore, Paige," Emily countered. "We're speaking about college Chemistry. And I really need to study alone anyway."

"...I see," Paige said curtly. "Okay then."

Emily sighed. She suspected that Paige was a little upset about her last remark.

"...Paige," she said after a while. "I didn't mean that you... it's just, when I'm with you, I'm... well, I'm distracted."

Paige shot a quick glance at her right. "Really, Fields? I'm distracting? How so?" she asked, biting a smile.

Emily rolled her eyes. "Well, for starters, you talk way too much. And it's as if you can't stay seated for more than five minutes. It's very annoying."

"Yeah, yeah," Paige smirked. "And that's why you can't concentrate. That's the only reason."

"Exactly," Emily confirmed. She dipped her head and fidgeted with the car's radio, in an attempt to hide her blushing face from Paige.

* * *

One week later, as promised, Paige showed up at the Blue Bird Café in San Francisco, waiting for Emily. Except this time, she wasn't the only one. A middle-aged man was waiting outside the café, dressed in a military uniform. Paige recognized him immediately.

She hadn't met Wayne Fields in person yet, but she had seen numerous photos of him. And she had even spoken with Emily's dad via Skype once or twice, a year ago, when Emily spent two weeks at the McCullerses'.

The military man was now staring at her, a stern look on his face, and Paige began to feel a little nervous. Dipping her head, she slowly walked towards the older man.

"Good evening, Sir," she said. "Mr. Fields."

"It's Colonel Fields," the man corrected in a deep voice.

Paige felt her cheeks flush red. "Sorry. Colonel Fields."

"That's better, soldier McCullers," Wayne Fields approved.

Paige glanced at him, and was surprised to find the man now smiling broadly at her.

"You can relax, young lady, I'm off duty tonight," he teased. He had the same dimples as Emily, Paige observed.

She gave the older man a nervous smile.

"I'm sorry, I'm just... I guess I didn't expect to see you here, sir. I mean Colonel," she corrected.

Wayne Fields chuckled. "Mr. Fields is fine, Paige. I was just kidding. And, I could say the same. About finding you here."

"Yeah, well..." Paige stammered. She didn't know what Emily's dad knew, or didn't know, about the way her relationship with his daughter ended.

"I must confess I'm a little surprised," Emily's dad resumed. "I didn't know that Emmy and you were seeing each other again."

"No, we're not..." Paige said hesitantly. "I mean, we're seeing each other again, yes, but... just as... friends, now," she explained.

Wayne Fields raised a brow. "Really?"

"Yes, sir," Paige confirmed. She could feel the man's eyes studying her.

"...As long as you're both okay with that," Emily's father finally said simply.

Just then, Emily exited the café. She did a double take at the sight of her father.

"Oh my god! Daddy!" she squealed, before rushing into Wayne's arms.

Paige took a step back and looked away, not wanting to intrude on a father-daughter moment.

Wayne Fields was hugging Emily tightly, a big smile on his face. He gently kissed his daughter's forehead and said: "So, I guess it's a good surprise then, Emmy? Seeing your old man?"

"Oh yes! I'm so glad to see you, dad! But how come you're here?" an excited Emily exclaimed.

"Well, let's say that your mother was a bit... worried, after she heard about your car accident," Wayne explained. "So, she kinda sent me on a mission," he added with a wink.

"But I told her it was nothing!" Emily protested. "See, I'm perfectly fine!"

Wayne chuckled. "You're gorgeous, as usual, Emmy. You're looking a little worn out, though. Do you get enough sleep? Do you eat correctly?"

"Dad, it's the end of my first year of college. It's perfectly normal to be a little tired," Emily objected.

"If you say so, kiddo," the older man said with a fond smile.

Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted Paige, who was quietly moving away from the scene.

"Miss McCullers!" Wayne said in a loud voice. "Where do you think you're going?"

Paige stopped dead in her tracks. "Um, back to my car, Sir?" she said sheepishly. "I was Emily's ride back to Berkeley, but since you're here now..." she explained.

Wayne Fields glanced at his daughter and chuckled. One look into Emily's eyes - and he knew all he'd wanted to know.

"Why don't you join us for a late dinner, Paige," he said. "Since you're here."

Paige looked at the man in uniform, and then at Emily.

"That's very nice of you to ask, sir, but I don't want to intrude," she said politely.

"You won't be," Wayne assured. "And I'd love to get to know you better, now that I'm lucky enough to see you in person," he joked. "Right, Emmy?" he added, winking at his daughter.

"...Yes, dad. Please, Paige, stay and have dinner with us," Emily pleaded.

"Yes, of course," Paige blurted out, earning a broad smile from her ex-girlfriend.

 _There's no way I can say no to a Fields_ , _I guess_ , Paige realized.

* * *

Paige, Emily and Wayne had dinner at an Italian restaurant located in North Beach, not far away from Emily's workplace.

The atmosphere was relaxed, and Paige, who had felt a little tense at first, even found herself laughing at Wayne's silly jokes. She was elated, too, to see how Emily was happy, her dad beside her. The raven-haired girl was positively glowing.

And Wayne Fields had another surprise in store for Emily, besides his unexpected visit. He had bought a new car for his daughter. "Nothing fancy," he explained. "Just a second-hand Toyota. A friend of mine owns this car shop in San Mateo. I closed the deal with him today. You can get the car next Monday, Emmy."

"But that's too much, daddy!" Emily exclaimed. "I don't need a new car..."

"Yes, you do," her father said firmly. "The other one is wrecked, you said it yourself. And I don't want you to waste time on public transportation. Plus, it's not always safe at night here. We're not in Rosewood anymore. It's a big city."

Emily chuckled. "That's exactly what Paige said," she said, glancing at her ex.

"Well, Paige's right," Wayne approved. "And it's important for a college girl to have her own car. Especially with a schedule like yours, Emmy."

Just before dessert, Emily excused herself to the bathroom, and Wayne seized the opportunity to have a word with Paige.

"So, Paige," he said, his tone now serious. "Tell me. What are your plans?"

"My... plans, sir?" Paige stammered, taken aback.

Was Wayne Fields asking her about her future in general? Or about her intentions towards Emily, specifically?

"Yes," the man said firmly. "You know what I mean, right, Paige?"

Paige dipped her head. "...I'm not sure," she whispered. "But I understand why... why you're asking me that."

"And?..." Wayne asked in a softer voice.

"I... I want to do things right, this time," Paige said. "I made some mistakes..."

"We all make mistakes, Paige," the older man said. "That's what makes us humans. But the important thing... is to be honest with others, and with ourselves. That way, we can fix... let's say, the majority of our mistakes."

"I've learned that, sir," Paige said in a hoarse voice, her eyes still down.

"Please look at me, Paige," Wayne Fields asked.

Paige slowly raised her eyes and looked at the man. She found nothing but genuine kindness in his deep brown eyes, so similar to Emily's.

"I'm not telling you this to make you feel bad or uncomfortable. On the contrary. I think you've suffered enough," Wayne said softly. "I just want to be sure that you're... driven enough now. And that you've learned... what's important in life."

Paige nodded, her throat tight.

"...But I believe you have," the man resumed. "And I don't want to sound too patronizing. Though I'm afraid I already am," he said in an attempt to lighten the mood.

"...No sir, you aren't," Paige managed to say in a hoarse voice. "And I understand why you're... worried, about... about Emily and me. And I want you to know that... that I will never hurt Em again. And that I will always protect her. No matter whether we simply stay good friends, or... or become more than that..." she said, the emotion obvious in her voice.

"I know that, Paige McCullers," Wayne Fields said, smiling gently at the girl in front of him.

Paige mouthed a "thanks" and quickly wiped her eyes.

"...What are you talking about?" a slightly worried Emily interrupted them, back from the bathroom. "Is everything okay? Paige, are you crying?"

"No, no, I'm not," Paige said, shaking her head. "I'm fine, Emily."

"We're good, Emmy," Wayne confirmed. "Paige here was just telling me about her plans to return to college next semester. Right, Paige?"

"Right, sir," Paige said. "I've just registered for Stanford's summer session, by the way. I want to give myself every chance to... make it," she revealed, blushing slightly.

"Really? Paige, that's great!" Emily exclaimed. "Isn't it, dad?"

"Absolutely," Wayne Fields confirmed. He motioned to the waiter, who immediately came over to the table.

"Young man, we'd like to order your best dessert," Wayne told the waiter. "Something chocolatey, maybe?... these young ladies here definitely need a treat," Wayne Fields concluded.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Well, as expected, January is hell at work, but I manage to stick with the Friday updates (for now, at least).**

 **I'm really, really thankful to _siophiefandom_ , who did an awesome (and super fast!) job at betareading this chapter. **

**I hope you guys will enjoy it. Let me know! Happy Friday, everyone! And thank you so much for keeping on reading.**

* * *

Emily was driving her new Toyota, a small smile on her lips. Everything was going well for her on this Saturday morning.

The sun was shining over the Bay Area, the radio was playing her favorite Beyoncé song, and she felt rather optimistic about her upcoming finals. She was also pretty confident about the last swim meet of the season.

Emily was heading to Paige's house in Oakland, intending to surprise the auburn girl with some treats for brunch.

Paige and Emily hadn't seen each other since the impromptu dinner with Wayne Fields, two weeks earlier. They weren't avoiding each other, but Emily had been spending almost all of her time studying, or training in the pool with her teammates.

The end of freshman year was crucial, and Emily knew that. She at least had to maintain her grades and her times in the pool if she wanted to keep her scholarship through sophomore year. And, so far, she had everything under control.

Except her relationship with Paige. They were still cautious around each other, and Emily had the feeling that, everytime they took a step forward, they also took a step backwards. It was frustrating; And Emily had decided to make a move.

She had tried waiting patiently for Paige to take the hint. That Sunday morning in Paige's kitchen, after their night at the bar in San Francisco, she had really thought, and hoped, that Paige was about to kiss her, but Hanna had interrupted their moment. Maybe it was for the best, Emily reasoned. After all, they still needed to talk about their relationship, about what both of them wanted.

And now, Emily had decided, was definitely the time for that talk.

Approaching the McCullerses' neighborhood, Emily spotted a small bakery across the street . The shop looked lovely, with a old-fashioned neon sign that read 'Best cupcakes in West Oakland'.

Two minutes later, Emily entered the bakery and was surprised to see that the place was fairly crowded. People were lining up to buy some pastries to go or to stay, though the few scarce tables seemed to have been taken already.

 _Well, that's definitely a good sign_ , Emily thought. Her brows furrowed in concentration as she studied the display of cupcakes in front of her. Everything looked - and smelled - delicious.

But Emily was looking for a specific kind of cupcake.

"Excuse me," she asked the boy behind the counter. "Do you have coconut ones, by any chance?"

The teenager stared at her, his face flushed. He was visibly mesmerized by the raven-haired beauty in front of him. "Co... coconut?" he stammered. "I... I don't know, Miss. I'm new here."

"Could you ask, please?" Emily said, smiling gently at the boy.

"Yes... yes, Miss," the red-headed boy stammered, before rushing to the back of the shop, narrowly missing a table in his haste.

A few customers chuckled, and Emily smiled apologetically at them.

"...I'm sorry, but we don't do coconut cupcakes anymore," said a female voice, and Emily turned her eyes to the young woman who could be seen coming from the kitchen. Emily couldn't help but notice that the woman was really gorgeous - she was tall, with wavy reddish hair and sparkling blue eyes.

"You know, my customers generally prefer more traditional flavors. Like vanilla, or strawberry. Or chocolate, of course," the woman explained in a warm voice. "But it's funny you should ask for coconut, because I used to sell them. One of my favorite customers was actually very fond of them. Unfortunately, she doesn't come here anymore. I guess that's the main reason I stopped making them."

"That makes sense," Emily said, smiling back at the young woman. "It's just that... well, my girlfr... I mean, my _friend,"_ she corrected, _"_... Paige, she really likes coconut cupcakes."

"...Wait, Paige? Are you talking about Paige McCullers?" the woman asked, her eyes widening.

Emily frowned. "...Yes," she said after a while. "Why, do you know her?"

The woman bit a smile. "...A little," she said. "I think we're talking about the same coconut-cupcake addict."

Emily didn't really know why, but, once she heard that, she felt rather uncomfortable under the older woman's stare. The woman was undeniably charming, but there was also something about her that bothered Emily.

"...I'm... I think I'm gonna go for those red velvet ones, then," Emily said. "My... friend likes them too, I think. I'll take four, please."

"That's a very good choice," the blue-eyed woman approved. "They're delicious too. Your... _friend_ won't be disappointed."

Emily just nodded, and waited for the woman to pack the pastries before handing her a ten-dollar bill.

"Oh no, it's on the house," the woman said with a charming smile. "Just tell Paige that Lauren says hello."

* * *

Paige was in the living room with Darryl, her young neighbor, when she heard the front doorbell ring.

"Go on," she told the boy while getting up, "Try to solve the next problem by yourself. It's an easy one." She had been tutoring Darryl in math since her return to Oakland, and the middle school boy had already made some significant progress.

Paige headed to the front door and opened it. She grinned widely at the sight of the girl in front of her.

"Emily! What a great surprise. How come you're here? I thought you were studying today?"

"Well, I thought I could use a break," Emily explained. "So I just, um, thought we could spend some time together this afternoon? If you're not too busy, that is."

Paige beamed at her ex-girlfriend. "I'm not. Well, I mean, I'm helping Darryl with his math homework, but we're almost finished," she explained. "Come in, Em, come on in. There's some fresh coffee in the kitchen."

"Good," Emily beamed. "I've brought some treats myself. Fresh baked goods."

"Oh yeah?" Paige said excitedly. "This is a really good day then!"

She followed Emily in the kitchen, and smiled at the sight of the raven-haired girl opening up the cupboard and taking out two mugs.

Turning back, Emily raised a brow at Paige's dopey smile. "What?" she asked.

"Nothing. I just... I guess I just like having you around, Em," Paige answered.

"Yeah... I do too," Emily simply whispered, before smiling back at Paige, a slight blush on her face.

"Thank you," Paige said softly, before taking a step forward. They stared at each other, both still hesitant, but eager to close the gap between them.

And then Paige made a move - she engulfed Emily in a tight hug, burying her head in the raven-haired girl's shoulder. She felt, more than she heard, Emily release a breath, and then she felt the delicious sensation of Emily's hand stroking her hair softly.

 _I missed that_ , Paige thought. _Oh, I so missed that_.

She let out a moan, earning a small giggle from Emily. Paige raised her head back and smiled up at Emily. She was about to say something when her eyes spotted the small box that the raven-haired girl had put on the kitchen's table.

Paige took a step back, letting go of Emily.

"...Em?" Paige asked, frowning. "Where... where did you buy those cupcakes?"

"Oh, they're from a small bakery a few streets away," Emily shrugged. "Why, is it important?"

Paige seemed frozen now, staring at the box like as if it were a bomb ready to explode.

"Paige?" Emily said, puzzled. "Hey, are you okay?"

"...Yes, I am," Paige stammered. "It's just... I happen to know the place."

"Oh yeah, I forgot," Emily smiled. "They seem to know you too, well, at least, a woman who works there does. She says hello, by the way. I don't remember her name, but..."

"It's Lauren," Paige croaked. "She's the owner."

"Yes, Lauren, that's it," Emily confirmed. "Wait, what's wrong?" she asked. She was starting to get really confused by Paige's odd behavior.

Paige let out a deep sigh and closed her eyes.

"That's her," she said in a low voice.

"What? Her, what?" Emily asked, before realization dawned on her.

"Oh," she whispered. "You mean, that's _the_ girl..."

Paige nodded. "Yes," she confirmed, dipping her head.

A silence fell over the two girls, only broken by Darryl's unexpected arrival in the room.

"Hey Paige, can I have a glass of... oh, hello, Emily!" the young boy exclaimed.

"Hello, Darryl," Emily muttered, her eyes still glued on Paige.

"It's great to see you again," Darry went on excitedly, oblivious to the tension in the room. He had always had a soft spot for Emily.

The raven-haired girl turned her eyes to the younger boy. "I'm glad to see you too, Darryl," she said with a small smile.

"Are you two together again?" the boy asked with interest.

"Darryl," Paige said in a warning voice.

Her young neighbor shrugged. "What? I'm just asking. It would be great. You're both pretty and nice."

"Darryl," Paige groaned again. "Just... get something to drink and go back to the living room, now."

"Okay," Darry said, rolling his eyes. "Oh, can I have one of those cupcakes too, please, Paige?" he asked, motioning to the box of cupcakes.

"Okay, but please, just get out," Paige said curtly.

The boy quickly grabbed a cupcake from the box and a Coke from the fridge and slipped out of the room.

"You didn't have to be so rude to him," Emily observed.

"I wasn't," Paige protested, even though she knew Emily was right.

"You were," Emily said. "You're always so defensive when things don't go your way."

"Excuse me?" Paige asked, irritated. "Are we doing this now?"

"Doing what?" Emily asked, her tone defensive.

"Forget it, Emily," Paige snapped in frustration. She couldn't believe that they were fighting, again - when things had been going so well just a moment earlier.

"...Of all the shops in Oakland, you had to go there. Of course," Paige mumbled bitterly.

Emily shook her head, the disbelief obvious on her face.

"Oh, so that's my fault now? Because I accidentally found out who your ex was?" she said, her voice rising.

"She's not my ex!" Paige snapped. "It was a one-night thing, nothing more, and you know it, Emily!"

"Oh really?" Emily hissed. "How could I know that, exactly? You never told me... anything about it. About _her_. Any details. God, I didn't even know her name!"

"Because it wasn't important!" Paige protested.

"Oh no, it wasn't important. You, cheating on me, wasn't important," Emily said wryly.

"Emily, that's not what I'm saying," Paige said curtly. "Not at all. It's just..."

"What? What now, Paige?" Emily asked in a defiant tone. "What can you say for..."

"I took all the blame, Emily," Paige cut her off. "I took all the blame, because I deserved it. I know that. But now, one year later, and after all that's happened, you still... you still can't get over it. You said you had forgiven me. But I don't think you really did," she concluded.

She glanced at Emily, who was now staring at the floor.

"...Maybe you're right," Emily said after a minute, her voice barely a whisper. "I thought we could talk things through like adults, but I guess I was wrong. I'd better go," she concluded, before leaving the room.

A frustrated and angry Paige reached for the cupcake box and threw it into the carbage can with such force that an unfortunate pastry bounced off and crashed onto the floor.

"Great," Paige muttered between her teeth. She fell, more than sat, on one of the kitchen chairs and took her head in her hands.

 _I messed it up, again._

* * *

Tim Finlay, Paige's uncle, was parking his car outside the McCullerses' when his fiancée, Nora, pointed out to him the boy who was standing still in front of the house.

"Isn't it young Darryl?" she asked. "What is he doing there?"

Tim frowned. "I don't know," he answered. "But he seems to be staring at something. Wait here for now, Nora," he said to his six-month pregnant fiancée.

Tim exited the car and walked quickly over to the boy.

« Hey buddy, » Tim greeted him. « What are you looking at?"

Darryl turned his eyes to the older man. "It's Paige," he said in a worried voice. "She's on the roof."

Tim narrowed his eyes. "What?" he said, before looking at the top of the house. He did a double-take. Darry was telling the truth. Tim's niece was sitting hunched up on the roof, near the chimney.

"…Okay, Darryl," Tim said after a brief silence. "Don't worry, Paige isn't going to fall."

Darryl nodded silently, his eyes still fixed on Paige.

"Do you know what happened?" Tim asked in an even tone. It wasn't the first time he had found his niece up there. Last time was a few years earlier, after a fight with her father.

"I'm not sure," Darryl said. "But her friend… the super pretty one, Emily… she was there before, and I think they had a fight. They were yelling at each other in the kitchen when I left."

"I see," Tim said. "I'm gonna climb up there and talk to her, okay, Son? Everything's gonna be all right," he assured the young boy.

* * *

Paige was staring blankly ahead, and didn't even turn her head when she heard a familiar voice coming from the window to the roof.

"Hey Paigey," Tim said softly, not wanting to scare his niece. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing. Just thinking," Paige mumbled.

"Oh yeah? Well, thinking is good. But why on the roof?" the young man asked gently.

Paige just shrugged.

"You know, Paigey," Tim resumed, "Your young neighbor down there is a bit scared."

Paige frowned and looked down at Darryl who was still staring up at her.

"Yeah? Well, there's nothing to worry about. I'm not going to jump. I'm not suicidal, Tim," she said wryly.

"Well, I hope you're not, but you could fall," her uncle retorted.

"No. And I've been there before," Paige muttered.

"Yeah. I know that, Paigey. And I also know that when you feel the need to climb up here, it's because you're feeling very angry. Or sad. Or both," Tim said in an even voice.

Paige shrugged again.

"Paige..." Tim pleaded. "Please. Look at me. If you don't, I'm gonna have to reach out to you, and we both now that I'm afraid of heights."

Paige let out a deep sigh, and crawled back to the window, much to her uncle's relief. Tim grabbed her by the shoulders to pull her inside. They both fell with a thud onto the sofa that, luckily, was positioned just under the window.

"Ouch, Paigey," Tim whined. "Did you gain some weight in Europe, or what? I didn't remember you being so heavy," he joked. "You should definitely need to get back to your training."

Paige smacked the young man on his shoulder, and Tim winced in mock pain.

"Shut up, Timmy boy," Paige groaned. "My training is going well, thank you very much. How come you're here, by the way?"

Tim sat upright on the sofa and put an arm around Paige's shoulders, squeezing her lightly.

"I just wanted to see my favorite niece," he said.

"I'm your only niece," Paige retorted.

"That's what I'm saying," Tim grinned.

Paige sighed, and glanced at her uncle. Tim immediately noticed that Paige's eyes were puffy and red from crying.

"Hey," he said softly. "Whatever it is, I'm here, Paigey."

Paige nodded, before burying her head in Tim's chest. She let out a sobbing breath, and Tim tightened his grip around her.

"Let it go," he whispered in his niece's ear, and that was all it took for Paige to start sobbing.

Tim waited patiently for Paige to stop crying, and when she did, he asked: "So, you wanna talk about it?"

"Not really," Paige said, wiping her eyes.

"Okay," Tim said. "I forgot for one moment that you're a McCullers. You stubborn Scottish people don't share your pain easily, do you?" he teased.

Paige rolled her eyes. "Unlike you, always emotional and chatty, like a true Irish boy, Tim Finlay."

"Well, you're a Finlay too," Tim deadpanned. "Half of you, at least."

"That's right," Paige admitted with a small smile.

They remained silent for a minute, and then Tim said in a cheeful voice:

"You know what, Paigey? We should really head downstairs now. Nora is waiting for us. She came along too. We couldn't wait to tell you in person."

Paige raised a brow. "Tell me? Tell me what? I already know she's pregnant, Tim," she joked.

"Yep," Tim nodded, a smug grin on his face. "But you don't know about the twins, do you?"

Paige gasped and stared at her uncle with wide eyes.

"The... the twins?" she exclaimed. "You and Nora gonna have _twins_?"

Tim beamed. "Yes. Twins. And a boy and a girl, by the way. Brace yourself, and be ready, Auntie Paige!"

* * *

Tim and Nora left just after seven that evening, after making sure that Paige was feeling better. They make her promise to call them if she was feeling too lonely; something that Paige hadn't wanted to admit openly, but that they both suspected.

It wasn't easy for a twenty-year-old girl to live alone in what was once her family's house. Paige's father had left for Nebraska a few weeks earlier, and had only phoned his daughter once or twice since. And Paige's friends, like Shana Fring, were studying far away, and had their own lives in college.

Of course, there was Emily, in Berkeley - but their relationship was still complicated.

Paige was determined to get her life back on track, as she had told Wayne Fields she would, but sometimes she felt rather overwhelmed by the task. And, of course, she was missing her mother. Jennifer McCullers had always been there for Paige when she was feeling insecure, or worried about something - or someone.

She was the anchor that Paige could rely on without hesitation, or fear of being judged or rejected. When Paige had confessed to her mother about the cheating, Jennifer McCullers had listened to her, and then had told her daughter that she had to accept the consequences of her actions.

Paige knew that she would always remember what her mom had told her back then: "Emily has every right to be mad at you, Paige, because you hurt her deeply. She must have felt so betrayed. I know that you didn't do that on purpose, but the fact is that you did."

When Paige had asked her mother if she thought that the situation could be fixed, Jenn McCullers had simply answered: "Nobody knows right now, baby girl. But whatever happens, I'll always be there for you."

Except she wasn't anymore. It was nobody's fault; It was fate, or destiny, if you believed in it. But at night, when she couldn't sleep, when her thoughts were wandering to dark places, Paige couldn't help but think that her mother's sudden death was payback. It was wrong, of course - and she knew that, but her insecure self was always there, lurking in the shadows, ready to take her over.

After her uncle and his fiancée's departure, Paige rummaged through the house, looking for her cell phone. She had thrown the device somewhere, in a rage, right after reading the text Emily had sent her after their fight that afternoon:

' _Paige_ ,' Emily had written, _'I think I need some space for now. At least until the end of finals and the last swim meet of the season. I know we have to talk, but I don't think that now is the right time. Take care. Emily.'_

Paige finally found her phone in the living room, under the coffee table. She checked the device, and frowned when she realized that she had missed several calls from an unknown number. There was a voice message, too. Though she hadn't heard it in almost a year, Paige immediately recognized Aria Montgomery's soft voice.

"Hello Paige, it's Aria. I don't know whether Spencer called you, I told her to, but she probably didn't, as stubborn as she is. You should know that Spencer is on a plane to California right now. She should be at the airport in San Francisco around nine PM, your time. Could you go and meet her there, please? It's a rather long story. I can't tell you everything, and I don't know whether she will, but... Spence's in trouble, Paige. And she really, really needs a friend."


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Hey guys! Sorry for the wait. January was a really busy month for me.**

 **I know that last chapter was a bit angsty, and ended with a mean (?) cliffhanger! ;) You're probably all wondering what happened to Spencer. Well, let's find out right now!**

 **A/N2: Once again, thank you so much to** _ **siophiefandom**_ **for the awesome betareading. And, you all,** _ **siophiefandom**_ **posted a new Paily multi-chapter fic yesterday! Yippee! Go and read it now, if you haven't done it yet!**

* * *

 _ **Oakland - Present day**_

Nick McCullers dropped his travel bag on the front porch and fumbled for the keys in his coat pocket.

He was exhausted, having traveled nonstop since the evening before.

Nick had taken a late stop-over flight from Lincoln, Nebraska, to San Francisco, via Denver, Colorado. He hadn't been able to sleep on board; like his daughter, he had been having trouble sleeping for years.

He was longing for some rest, but also for some good, hot coffee. (The coffee he had on the flight was, as he told the stewardess, "absolutely awful, not to mention cold.")

Nick entered the house and made a beeline for the kitchen. He stopped dead in his tracks at the sight in front of him. He had expected to find a few changes in the house (after all, Paige had been living there alone for months), but he definitely wasn't prepared to find a stranger in his own kitchen.

An undeniably attractive, but also lighty clothed young woman, clad only in a loose t-shirt and some boxer shorts was staring at him, her eyes wide.

"Who are you?" the tall, slender girl asked, in a half-scared, half-angry voice.

"Who are _you_?" Nick McCullers barked back. "And what are you doing here, in my house? Where is Paige?"

"...She went out for a run," the young woman said. She narrowed her eyes at the man in front of her. "Are you her father?"

"Yes, obviously, I am," the middle-aged man said in a stern voice. "And I guess you are... my daughter's new girlfriend?"

"What?" the brunette girl asked, taken aback. "No, not at all. I'm just a friend."

"A _friend_ ," Nick McCullers snorted. "Really. And what's your name, may I ask?"

"I'm Spencer, Spencer Hastings," the brunette said firmly.

"Never heard of you before," Nick grumbled.

Spencer frowned. "Really? Well, as I told you, I'm a friend of Paige's. From Rosewood. And, for the record, I've heard a lot about you... _sir_ ," she said in a defiant tone, crossing her arms at her chest.

The older man huffed and glared at the young woman in front of him. She was holding his stare, and didn't seem to be intimidated by him at all, unlike most people.

"...Well," Nick groaned, "I guess that what you heard was mostly complaints, then."

He took a seat at the kitchen island and dipped his head, before closing his eyes. He seemed really exhausted and a bit disheartened, and, against all odds, Spencer felt a twinge of sorrow for him.

"...Would you like some coffee, sir?" she asked in a softer voice.

The older man opened his eyes and looked at Spencer. "Yes," he said with a tired smile. "I'd love some coffee."

* * *

When Paige entered the kitchen, back from her morning run, she did a double take at the sight of her father and Spencer, apparently casually chatting over coffee.

"Dad?" she asked, dumbfounded. "What are you doing here?"

Nick McCullers stood up. "Hello, Paige," he said in a low voice. "How are you?"

"I'm... fine," Paige said, frowning slightly. "But I didn't know that you were coming back... not that it's a bad thing," she quickly added. "It's your home after all. I'm just... surprised, I guess."

"I get it," Nick McCullers said. "I'm sorry I didn't call you first, Paige, but... I acted on impulse, and hopped on that plane," he said almost sheepishly. "I hope you're okay with that."

Paige stared at her father, puzzled. _Since when do you act on impulse? And since when do you care how what I feel?..._

Nick took a step forward and gave his daughter an awkward hug, before leaning back.

"Are you... are you here for a visit, or are you back to stay?" Paige asked in a cautious voice.

"Well," Nick said, "We'll talk about that later, Paige. Right now, I really need to take a nap. The trip was exhausting."

Paige glanced at Spencer. "Oh, about that... Spencer is actually staying in the main bedroom, I mean in your room... I'm sorry, I didn't know that you..." she stammered.

Nick McCullers raised a calming hand.

"It's fine, Paige. Your friend here told me about that, and the sleeping arrangements are all settled. I'm not the kind of man to throw a lady out of her room. I'll sleep in the attic. The sofa bed's still in there, right?"

"...Yes, of course," Paige answered, puzzled. "But are you sure that you want..."

"I'll be perfectly fine in the attic," her father cut her off. But uncharacteristically for him, his tone wasn't defensive or aggressive.

Paige's mind was racing. _What he is doing here? Why is he acting nice all of a sudden? And how come he and Spencer are getting along?..._

A silence fell over the room, only broken by Nick's low voice. "...Well, I know you girls have plans for today. As I said, I really need some rest. I'll be upstairs. It was lovely to meet you, Spencer."

"Thank you, Mr. McCullers. The pleasure was all mine," Spencer answered with a wide smile.

Paige waited until her dad was out of the kitchen, and turned to Spencer.

"What is going on here?" she asked, her brows furrowed.

Spencer shrugged. "I don't really know. Your dad just showed up out of nowhere. Well, technically, out of Lincoln, Nebraska. Which boils down to the same thing, I guess," she joked in an attempt to lighten the mood.

Paige rolled her eyes. "Seriously, Spencer, what were you two talking about?"

"Nothing important," Spencer said. "Relax, Paige. Your dad and I actually had a civil, and even rather pleasant, conversation. And I promise we weren't talking about you at all."

Paige sighed and took a seat near Spencer. "Sorry, Spence," she said sheepishly. "It's just that... I can't help thinking that he's got an agenda, you know?"

Spencer patted her friend on the arm soothingly. "I totally understand. Don't forget that I have the same kind of father."

"Yes, I know," Paige said with a half-smile. "Though I've never run into your father in his own kitchen yet. Not to mention, while I was half-clothed," she joked, earning an eye roll from Spencer.

"Well, he looked surprised, that's for sure," the slender brunette smirked. "And I was, too. My first thought was that he was a burglar, or even a maniac."

Paige scoffed. "Well, don't tell him that, please."

"I won't," Spencer giggled. "And don't worry, after the initial shock, we introduced ourselves properly. As I told you, we had a nice little chat. And I even told him why I left UPenn and came over here."

Paige's eyes widened. "You did?"

"Well, just the big picture, of course", Spencer said. "The whole story would be... too embarrassing."

"About that," Paige said. "Did you call Melissa?"

"Yes," Spencer nodded. "She was really supportive. She said she'd talk to our parents. And she was really relieved to hear that I'm not alone here."

"You're not," Paige affirmed. "We'll find a solution. We're team McHastings!" she exclaimed, nudging Spencer playfully.

Spencer smiled at her friend. "Well, yeah, I guess were are. Speaking about teams - at what time exactly is the swim meet tomorrow afternoon?"

Paige looked down, biting her lip. "...Three o'clock," she said reluctantly. "Do you really think it's a good idea, Spence? I'm not so sure..."

"It is," Spencer said forcefully. "And you agreed to come with me, McCullers. Don't chicken out now. I kept my part of the deal: I called my sister."

* * *

 _ **One week earlier**_

Paige was pacing back and forth in the arrival hall at San Francisco aiport, anxiously waiting for Spencer's flight to land.

She had phoned Aria back, of course. The petite brunette had been rather cryptic, only informing Paige that Spencer had left Rosewood hastily and on impulse - something very un-Spencery.

From what Aria had said, it was obvious that something had happened in Spencer's life, something major. But the petite girl hadn't revealed any details.

"Spencer will tell you about it, well, at least I hope she will," Aria had explained.

"Okay, Aria, but... does Spencer know that I'm gonna meet her at the airport? And... did you call Emily too?" Paige had asked cautiously.

"Well, no. Paige, just so you know, Spencer made me swear not to tell Em or Hanna. But she didn't say anything about you, so... that's why I called you," Aria had admitted almost sheepishly.

When Paige spotted Spencer among the arriving passengers from Philadelphia, she pushed her way through the crowd and called out her friend's name.

Spencer stopped dead in her tracks, her eyes widening at the sight of the auburn-haired girl.

"Paige? But how..." she stammered, before realization dawned on her. "Aria," she said, shaking her head, looking more weary than upset.

"Yes, Aria," Paige confirmed. She reached for Spencer's travel bag and studied her friend's face. Spencer looked exhausted, paler than ever, and had dark circles beneath her eyes.

"She just told me that you're... in trouble. She seemed really worried, and I am, too. Spencer, what happened? And were you planning to call me?" Paige asked.

Spencer looked away reluctantly.

"Spencer," Paige said softly.

"...Maybe later," Spencer muttered. "I didn't want to bother you. I've booked a room in a hotel in downtown San Francisco for tonight."

"Nonsense," Paige said in a firm tone. "You're coming with me. There's plenty of room at my place."

Spencer opened her mouth to protest, but Paige gave her a stern look.

"Hastings. It's late, and you look really worn out. You can go wherever you want to tomorrow, but for now you're coming with me. End of discussion."

* * *

One hour later, Spencer joined Paige in the McCullerses' kitchen. She was feeling slightly better after having showered and changed into her pajamas.

Paige had gotten her settled in the master bedroom, which hadn't been used since Nick McCullers' departure.

Paige, who was busy reheating some leftovers, turned around and smiled at the slender brunette.

"Dinner's on the way," she said.

"Thanks, but I'm not hungry at all," Spencer muttered. She took a seat at the kitchen's island and let out a deep sigh.

"You should eat," Paige observed. "You're thinner than ever, and that's really saying something."

"Who are you now, my mother?" Spencer snapped, before quickly backtracking at the look of hurt on Paige's face.

"Sorry, Paige, I... I didn't mean that. It's just... I don't want to eat," she said in a sheepish voice.

"What do you want then?" Paige asked.

Spencer shook her head. "I don't really know," she admitted.

"Do you need to get drunk?" Paige proposed. "Cause we can definitely do that. I've got this twenty-year old single malt whiskey I brought back from Ireland."

Spencer raised a brow before letting out a small laugh. "That's tempting," she said. "How come you haven't opened that bottle yet?"

"I was saving it for a major crisis," Paige deadpanned. "And I wasn't going to drink it alone, all by myself, was I? But now, you're the perfect excuse."

"Bring out the whiskey, then," Spencer said with a small smile. "But just a few shots, okay? I don't want to get drunk. Not yet, at least. And you should stay sober too, if you want to listen to the whole story."

"I do," Paige affirmed. "I'm all ears, whenever you're ready."

The two girls settled in the living room, the bottle of whiskey and two glasses with in reach on the coffee table.

Paige waited patiently for Spencer to start speaking. Her friend was staring blankly into space, her eyes glassy, though she hadn't started drinking yet.

"...So," Spencer finally said after a few minutes of silence. "I don't even know where to start."

"Wherever you want," Paige simply said.

Spencer sighed deeply. " Well, be warned, because it's a rather long story."

"No problem," Paige said. "We've got time."

She reached out for the bottle of whiskey and poured herself a glass. "Want some?" she asked Spencer.

"Not yet," the brunette answered. "Probably later. When I want to drown myself in self-pity."

"Um, believe me, I've been there," Paige said with a half-smile. She took a sip of her whiskey. "Wow," she whispered, her eyes widening. "My cousin Kieran wasn't kidding. That's really something."

Spencer glared at Paige. "McCullers. Stop playing the whiskey card on me. Do you want to hear my story, or not?"

"Definitely," Paige said, putting the glass back on the coffee table. "Sorry, Spencer. Go ahead."

"...So, " Spencer started. "I guess it's better to start from the beginning. You remember that I told you that after Toby, I wanted to stay single for a while and focus on my studies? "

Paige nodded silently. Spencer and Toby Cavanaugh, her long-time boyfriend, had broken up at the end of senior year, in high school . There were no hard feelings; they had been drifting apart for a while, and had come to the realization that they didn't want the same things in life. Spencer's main goal was to pursue a successful career in law, preferably in a big city, after graduating from college. Toby, on the other hand, wanted to live in a small town, and planned to build a family quickly.

Paige recalled Spencer telling her the news over the phone, about a year earlier. Spencer hadn't seemed depressed then. A little sad, of course, but that was understandable.

"...And you remember," Spencer resumed, "that every time you asked me over the phone about my, uh, love life, I told you that it was non-existent? That I wasn't even dating anybody?"

Paige nodded again.

"Well," Spencer said, "I wasn't telling the truth entirely... Oh hell, whom am I kidding? I was lying," she confessed, her eyes down.

"Okay," Paige said in an even tone. "I guess you had your reasons for that."

Spencer glanced at her friend. "Yeah," she mumbled. "You could say that. It was... a secret, you know? No one could know, at any cost."

Paige frowned. "So... are you saying that you have a... secret relationship with someone? And the guy wants to keep it a secret, too? Wait, it's a guy, right?"

Spencer rolled her eyes. "Yes, McCullers. Sorry to disappoint you, but I didn't switch teams. Yes, I'm talking about a guy. A man," she added.

"...Older?" Paige asked.

Spencer nodded. "Much older," she admitted, blushing slightly. "And... married."

"Oh," Paige said, at a loss for words.

"I know how it sounds," Spencer said bitterly. "Yes, I was 'the other woman'."

"Spencer, I'm not going to judge you, certainly not," Paige said in a soft voice. "But you said 'was'... it's over then?"

The brunette closed her eyes and sighed. "...Yeah," she said. "Of course it is. We managed to keep it a secret for a few months, but then..."

"What happened? The... his wife found out?" Paige asked cautiously.

Spencer opened her eyes and cleared her throat.

"Well, yes, eventually, she did. And she wasn't the only one. It was all over the campus social media."

Paige frowned, puzzled. "What? But why? Wasn't it a private matter?"

Spencer glared at the auburn girl. "Paige. Don't you get it? This man was my professor at UPenn. Not to mention, the Dean's husband."

"Oh, wow," Paige said, bemused.

"And it gets worse," Spencer said in a somber tone. "The Dean, Kathlyn Whitfield, that's her name... she happens to be a good friend of my parents. She even went to college with my mother. Can you believe it?"

"Oh wow," Paige said again, earning another glare from Spencer. "Um, sorry, Spence. I just... I wasn't expecting anything like that."

"Well, believe me, nobody was," Spencer snorted. "Especially not my family. And according to the UPenn newspaper, it was the scandal of the year."

"I seriously doubt that," Paige countered.

"Well, try googling me, and you'll see," Spencer retorded. "'Slut' and 'whore' have been the most common hits for 'Spencer Hastings' these past days", she said bitterly.

Paige shook her head vigorously. "But Spencer... that's totally wrong, and so unfair. They blame _you_? But what about him? He's the married one. You're not."

Spencer sighed deeply. "Well, Paige, you know how it works. The woman is always the culprit. They even call me the 'evil seductress' on campus.

"That's insane," Paige said. "And... that's why you left? Because of the scandal?"

Spencer dipped her head. "Yes. I couldn't face it anymore. The shame, the hate even... And... also because... well, he left me," she confessed, her voice almost breaking.

"What?" Paige said in disbelief. "He was the one who broke it off?"

"...Yeah," Spencer sighed. "He literally ran back to his wife when it went viral. I was so stupid. I... I was in love, you see? And I thought he loved me too, you know? When we met, he told me that his marriage wasn't working anymore, and the usual stuff. And I bought that. God, I can't believe I did," she said, running a distressed hand through her hair.

"Spencer," Paige said, "I'm so sorry..."

"Don't be," Spencer mumbled. "I'm the one to blame. Oh god, I feel so ashamed. And what a cliché: the married professor and his student. And, to quote my father, 'it had to be the Dean's husband.'"

"Well," Paige observed, "it's not as if you had a choice, if you... if you loved him", she said carefully. "We don't choose whom we fall in love with."

Spencer nodded sadly. "Yeah, I guess you're right," she whispered, dipping her head. She grabbed a plaid blanket that was on the couch and wrapped it around herself, shivering.

"I'm always cold these days," she told Paige with a sheepish look. "I don't really know why though."

"Well, you've been through a lot," Paige observed. Spencer really looked exhausted, and Paige couldn't help but feel a twinge of guilt _._

 _I was so focused on my story with Emily that I didn't pay any attention to Spencer_. _She was always there for me when I needed her... I guess now is the time for me to be here for her._

"...So, your parents reacted strongly?" Paige asked. "Both of them?"

"Yes, and that's an understatement," Spencer said. "My father was in such a fury, I've never heard him yelling like that before. And my mother... the look in her eyes... as if she felt so disappointed, disgusted by me, even."

"No, no, Spencer, I can't believe that," Paige protested. "She's your mother, she has to understand. At least, she has to support you."

"Paige, we're the Hastingses," Spencer stated. "My family... doesn't work like yours, like a middle-class family. Sorry, that came out wrong," she added hastily. "What I mean, is... the Hastings clan has a social status to maintain, to quote my father. And they hate any form of publicity. Not to mention scandals. We have to be examples, that's what my mother says all the time. Examples of good behavior, and virtue."

"Virtue?" Paige asked, dumbfounded. "But Spence... we're humans. We all make mistakes, sometimes. Even big ones." _The way I did, with Emily_.

"Well, tell that to my parents," Spencer said bitterly.

"And what about your sister? Does she know?" Paige asked.

"Yes, she does. And by the way, Melissa really surprised me," Spencer admitted. "She actually stood with me against our parents."

"That's good," Paige approved. "Does Melissa know you're here?"

Spencer shook her head. "No. I acted on impulse. The only one who knows I'm here is Aria; you already know that. But I guess I'll have to call Melissa later, though. I don't want my family to launch a nationwide search for me," she said, rolling her eyes.

"Yep," Paige said with a half-smile. "That would be bad."

The two girls remained silent for a moment, until Paige spoke again.

"...You could have told me from the start, you know," she said softly. "I get why you wanted to keep it private, and it's pretty obvious why you told Aria... because of um, her relationship with Mr Fitz... with Ezra, but I would have understood too. You're my best friend, Spencer. You can tell me anything. Including things like this."

Spencer smiled at the auburn girl. "Yes, I know, Paige. Why do you think I ran out here?"

"Well, maybe to put the greatest distance you could between you and your parents, without leaving the country?" Paige grinned.

"Yeah, that was the idea," Spencer smirked. "And the plane ticket to Alaska or to Hawaii is too expensive anyway. Besides, I knew that you wouldn't judge me."

"Why? Because of what I did to Emily?" Paige asked softly.

Spencer's eyes widened. "Paige, no. Not at all. That's not what I mean. It's just that... you and me, we understand each other, right?"

"I like to think that," Paige grinned. "And I'm glad you ran away to California... instead of Alaska or Hawaii," she said with a wink.

Spencer gave her a thankful smile. "Yeah, I am too. And now, pour me a shot of that fabulous whiskey of yours, McCullers. I think it's time."

* * *

 **Berkeley - present day**

Emily got out of the pool and took off her swimming goggles, shaking her head in frustration. She definitely wasn't happy with herself. Her times were far from her best, which wasn't surprising considering her inability to focus that day. Or the days before.

"...Hey Fields," said a loud voice behind her. "What's wrong? You sure seem to have lost all your mojo lately."

Emily huffed and turned around to face the tall, broad-shouldered girl who was staring at her, hands on her hips. Rochelle was the team captain, and one of the best swimmers Emily had ever seen. She was self-assured, even a little cocky sometimes, but she was a very good leader, always taking care of her teammates.

"I don't know what you mean," Emily said in a defensive tone.

Rochelle rolled her eyes. "Oh, come on, Emily. Your swimming has been really off for a week or so. I get it if you're saving your energy for the competition, but do I have to remind you that the meet against Austin is _tomorrow_?"

"Well," Emily grumbled, "Tell me something I don't know, _captain_."

Rochelle frowned at the younger girl. "Fields. I don't know what's going on with you, but you need to pull yourself together real quickly. You're one of my best assets, you know."

Emily snorted. "Yeah, and that's why you pulled me out of the relay today."

The tall girl in front of her shook her head. "It wasn't a punishment. Don't you get it, Emily? The team needs you, and now is definitely not the time to falter," she observed.

Emily sighed and dipped her head. "I know that," she said in a barely audible voice.

"Freshman year can be a lot of pressure," Rochelle conceded in a softer tone. "But you did a wonderful job in the pool these past months. So, what's wrong now?"

The raven-haired girl didn't answer, but bit her bottom lip and looked away.

She couldn't tell her captain that she had been waiting for a sign from her ex-girlfriend since their fight, a week earlier. And that she was too proud to take the first step herself. She knew she couldn't blame Paige for being silent; after all, Emily was the one who had asked for some space.

"Everything's okay," Emily said. "I'm just a little tired, that's all."

She could feel Rochelle's worried eyes on her.

"...Okay," her captain said after a while. "I really hope so, Emily. Now, go hit the shower, and try to relax tonight. And please, don't go to bed too late. I want you in top form for the meet tomorrow, okay?"

Emily just nodded, and then grabbed her towel and headed for the locker room, her head down. _Tomorrow is gonna be a long, long day._

* * *

 **A/N: Just a quick comment about Spencer's remark about Nebraska. Please Nebraskans, don't feel offended. It was just a joke; My paternal grandfather was from Omaha, and of course we all know Lindsey is from Lincoln. So... it was just a wink. Go Cornhuskers! ;) _subway20_**


	15. Chapter 15

_**A/N: Hey guys! So, are you still there?... Sorry for the wait. I'm really impatient (and anxious) to read your reactions to this chapter. And I promise I will update soon...ish.**_

 _ **As always, a BIG thank you to the best betareader ever - siophiefandom. ;)**_

* * *

 **Oakland**

Paige knocked softly at the door and waited for her father's answer.

"Come in," Nick McCullers said in his deep voice, and Paige entered the attic, looking around her. The sofa bed was deployed, making the already narrow room even smaller. Her father was sitting at his desk, his computer open in front of him. He seemed to be looking at a real estate website, Paige noticed with a twinge of concern.

"Are you planning to sell the house? Is that why you're here?" Paige asked in the most even tone she could muster.

Nick McCullers raised his eyebrows. "What? Of course not, Paige. I wouldn't do that without telling you about it first. It's your house, too."

"Oh, okay," Paige said, relieved. "I just thought... sorry." She sat on the bed and sighed, her eyes down.

Nick McCullers studied his daughter, his forehead creased. He didn't look upset, but he definitely seemed worried, and uncomfortable.

"So, how come you're here, Dad?" Paige asked after a brief silence. "I mean, why now?"

Her father cleared his throat. "Well, let's just say that... your uncle Tim and I had a little discussion over the phone. About you, mostly."

Paige cringed. "Oh yeah? And what did Tim tell you, exactly?"

Her father and Tim had never gotten along very well. They had only maintained cordial relations with each other thanks to Jenn McCullers.

"Paige, what we said is between me and your uncle," Nick McCullers observed.

"No, not when you talk about me," Paige retorted. "Did Tim tell you about... about the roof?"

Nick frowned, puzzled. "The... roof?" he asked. "What happened with the roof? Does it need to be fixed?"

"Um, no, that's not..." Paige said quickly. "Listen, forget about the roof. I'm just wondering... what Tim told you exactly, about me."

"Well, he's a bit worried," Nick McCullers said. "And I am, too."

Her father's voice was unusually soft, almost kind, and Paige stared at him, dumbfounded.

"You are?" she asked in a hoarse voice.

"Of course," Nick huffed. "Seriously, Paige. Do you really think I'm heartless?"

"...No, I... I don't know," Paige muttered. "Sorry," she added.

"Paige," Nick said, sighing. He ran a hand through his short hair. "I don't know how to do this... Help me, would you?" he asked, his voice almost pleading.

Paige stared at her father. Nick McCullers had never been the one to ask for help, much less admit to any weakness.

"I... I don't know what to say, dad," she said in a small voice. "I don't know how to do it, either."

Nick McCullers sighed deeply. "I know, Paige. I don't know what to say, either. And I guess it's my fault. You never had any problem confiding in your mother, or your uncle for that matter."

Paige just nodded; it was pointless to deny it.

A silence settled between them, until Nick spoke again.

"...You know Paige, I really want the best for you. And I realized that it was probably selfish of me, going back to Nebraska and leaving you by yourself here."

"It was fine," Paige said, shrugging. "I'm okay."

"Really?" her father asked in a doubtful tone.

"Yeah. And by the way, I'm not alone anymore," Paige said.

"That's right," Nick nodded. "Your friend Spencer is staying here with you, now."

"Yeah, and... is that okay with you? I mean, it's your house. I would have asked you, but it wasn't planned, and..." Paige began.

"Paige, it's your home too. And I already told you I'm fine with it. I'm glad that you have a friend to stay here with you. And that Spencer girl is an interesting young woman, by the way. Very witty, and smart. I can see why you two get along so well."

Paige smiled at her father, relieved. "Yeah. I'm lucky to have her."

"Well, she's certainly lucky to have you, too," Nick observed. "How long is she planning to stay? Not that I mind," he added quickly.

"Well," Paige said, "We don't know yet. It depends on what she's going to do next semester, you know? After... after what happened, Spencer can't really go back to UPenn. She hopes that she will be able to transfer to a school in California."

"That would be a good choice," Nick said. "Just tell me if you need any help on that."

"Really?" Paige asked, surprised. _What happened to him? How come he's so supportive and understanding now?_

"Really," Nick confirmed. "You remember my friend Robert, from Omaha? He's a Berkeley alumnus, and he still has a position on the university council. I know it's not Stanford, but..."he said with a wink.

"That would be... really awesome, Dad" Paige stammered, taken aback. "But to tell you the truth, Melissa Hastings, Spencer's sister, who's an attorney, is already giving us a hand with Spencer's transfer. Any extra help would be great, though," she quickly added when she saw his father's smile faltering a little.

"Okay, just let me know, then," Nick said simply.

"..And about Berkeley," Paige said. "As a matter of fact, we're heading there this afternoon, Spencer and I. That's what I wanted to tell you."

Nick McCullers raised a brow. "Really? What are you planning to do there?"

Paige fidgeted on her seat. "We, um," she stammered. "We're going to a swim meet. As spectators. Well, more as fans," she admitted, blushing slightly.

"And whom are you going to root for, if I may ask?" Nick McCullers asked, a small smile on his lips.

"...Emily," Paige just answered softly.

"So," Nick said. "Emily Fields is still in the background, then."

Plaige glared at her father. "Yes. But I guess Tim already told you that."

"Well, Emily's name came up one or twice during our conversation, yes," Nick McCullers acknowledged.

Paige didn't answer, but she lowered her head, letting out a small sigh.

"...You know, Paige," her father observed after a brief silence. "If you think it's worth it... if you think _she's_ worth it, then you should keep on fighting for your... relationship. Just... don't get hurt, and don't forget yourself in the meantime, okay?..."

* * *

 **Spieker Pool - UC Berkeley**

Emily was struggling. Especially with her freestyle stroke, which was normally one of her strengths. Even without seeing her teammates' worried glances at her, she could feel them - along with the frown on her coach's face.

To make matters worse, since the beginning of the meet, the Austin swim team had turned out to be one of the toughest opponents of the season for the Berkeley Bears.

After Emily's first two races, in which she placed 5th and 6th, the coach took her aside and said: "Listen Fields, you're obviously off today. I don't think that you should swim the relay."

Emily flinched. She felt hurt, but she knew better than to argue with her coach.

"Okay, coach Fisher," she muttered, her eyes down.

The middle-aged woman sighed and patted Emily's shoulder.

"It happens, Emily. Don't be too hard on yourself. You've had an impressive year for a freshman. And you still have a chance to redeem yourself today, in the 200 meter backstroke. Just try to enjoy yourself, okay?"

Emily just nodded, fighting back the tears. Somehow, the coach's unusual kindness was making things worse.

Emily took her place on the bench, and, for the first time since the beginning of the meet, she took the time to scan the crowd that filled the natatorium.

There were the usual Berkeley fans, wearing the school's colors, navy and gold.

There was a small delegation from Austin, of course, which was especially loud and combative. And, of course, there were parents and friends, and even a few scouts from other colleges.

And, in the middle of the crowd, there were two familiar faces who were staring right at her.

The raven-haired girl did a double take when she realized who it was. _Paige... and Spencer?!_

The two girls were holding a big sign with Emily's name written in golden letters, and a drawing of a blue shark just below it.

Emily stared back at her friends, her eyes wide open in shock, her heart racing faster all of a sudden.

A beaming Spencer waved at her, whereas Paige just shot her a shy smile, before dipping her head, in her typical McCullers style.

And then, Paige did something that won Emily's heart - again, and once and for all.

The auburn girl slowly raised back her head up and, staring at Emily, stood up and put her right hand on her heart. It was the exact same gesture than she'd done during that swim meet in Rosewood, more than a year earlier.

Emily felt her eyes prickle all of a sudden, and let out a strangled laugh. Even from the other side of the pool, she could feel the intensity of Paige's stare on her, and she could tell that her ex-girlfriend was, like her, deeply moved.

Then Paige mouthed something, and it took Emily a few seconds to realize what Paige was telling her: " _Breathe_!"

Emily released the breath she hadn't realized she was holding, and simply nodded, before smiling at Paige - and at Spencer, who was looking at the exchange with a crooked grin.

A voice coming from her left woke Emily up from her dazed state.

"Fields!" the assistant coach addressed the raven-haired girl. "You still with us? You're swimming next! Are you ready for it?"

"...Yes," Emily answered, her eyes still glued on Paige. "I am so very ready."

* * *

Emily didn't win the 200 meter backstroke that day, but she took a very honorable second place, just behind the star of Austin's team, MacKenzie Clark.

Emily's last lap was so impressive that the Berkeley coach finally decided to let her swim the relay race. And Emily didn't disappoint. The crowd in the natatorium erupted in cheers when she hit the wall, putting her team in pole position before the last lap.

Unfortunately for the Californian swimmers, MacKenzie Clark, who was anchoring for Austin, outperformed her Berkeley opponent on the final stretch.

Out in the crowd, Paige and Spencer felt slightly sorry for the home team, but also very proud of Emily.

"Did you see her? Did you see that top-notch turn she did?" an excited Paige told Spencer for the tenth time.

Spencer rolled her eyes. "Yes, McCullers. I was there. Yes, she did great, and her turn seemed... perfect. Though I don't know anything about swimming. But if you say so... I'm sure you were looking very, very closely," she added, nudging Paige playfully.

Paige's cheeks turned deep red. "Well," she muttered, "I'm just saying that Emily's style is awesome. She should have anchored."

"Sure," Spencer grinned. "Emily's style is great. In and out the pool."

"Absolutely," Paige approved forcefully. Spencer giggled, earning a glare from the auburn girl.

"Wait, Hastings. Are you making fun of me?"

"Never, McCullers. Never," Spencer affirmed, an indulgent smile on her lips.

But Paige wasn't paying attention to Spencer anymore; Her eyes were solely focused on the raven-haired beauty who was heading towards them, a radiant smile on her lips.

"Hey there!" a beaming Emily exclaimed, before jumping into Spencer's arms. "Spence! I can't believe it's you! What a great surprise!"

Spencer hugged Emily back. "Yeah, I know. Tell me about it," she deadpanned.

"But how? How come you're here?" Emily said, letting go of her friend. "Don't you have finals?"

Spencer simply shrugged. "Well, that's a long story. I'll tell you all about it later, Em."

Paige was watching the interaction between the two friends from a step behind, feeling hesitant. It was one thing to cheer for Emily from the bleachers; it was another to stand in front of her ex-girlfriend when she had asked for some space.

But Emily didn't let Paige overthink things too much. She reached for the auburn girl, engulfing her in a tight hug. "Thank you so much," Emily whispered in Paige's ear, making the other girl's heart skip a beat. Emily smelled of chlorine from the pool, but there was also her distinctive scent of lavender and coconut, something that Paige couldn't resist.

"...You're welcome," Paige said in a croaked voice, earning a light giggle from Emily. "And congratulations, Em. You did really great today," she added.

Emily took a step backward and tilted her head. "Yeah?" she asked with a half-grin and raised eyebrows. "So, you liked what you saw?"

"Oh, believe me, Em, she did," Spencer intervened when she saw that Paige wasn't answering but was staring at Emily, and blushing profusely.

Spencer nudged her friend. "Come on, McCullers," she whispered. "Just ask her."

"Ask me what?" Emily said, but before either of the girls could answer, a tall girl appeared from behind Emily and yelled: "Fields, there you are! The team is waiting for you. Come on, we're gonna celebrate big time. You earned it, gal!"

Emily shot an apologetic wince to Paige and Spencer. "I've got to go," she explained. "It's a team thing, and it's the last meet of the year... but... we'll catch up later, okay?" she pleaded.

Paige simply nodded. She understood, of course, being a swimmer herself, but she couldn't help feeling a bit disappointed.

That wasn't lost on Spencer, who poked Paige on the arm one more time. "Come on, Paige!" she urged. "Ask her, for god's sake!"

Paige cleared her throat. "Listen, Emily," she began, "Are you free this weekend? We're... we're heading to the cabin. You know, in Lakeport?"

"Oh... yeah, I know the place," Emily said, taken aback.

How could she not remember? She and Paige had shared their first weekend together there, a year earlier. Not to mention, their first night as lovers.

"...I was planning to start packing this weekend... the school year's almost over..." Emily stammered. As much as she wanted to say yes, going back there would obviously trigger some memories. And Emily didn't know whether or not she was ready for that.

"Come on Em," Spencer insisted, sensing Emily's hesitation. "It will be great to spend some time together, just the three of us. You and I have to catch up anyway, and it will be the perfect place to relax... and to talk," the slender girl added, glancing at Paige. "So, you think you can join us, Berkeley girl?"

Emily looked at Paige, who was staring at her, the hope obvious on her face.

"...Well, I guess the packing can wait a little... so, okay, count me in," Emily eventually affirmed, earning an enthusiastic 'Yes!" from Spencer, and a dopey grin from Paige.

* * *

On Saturday, Emily hit the road to Lakeport, in her red Toyota. She felt elated - finals were over, and though she didn't know her results yet, everything had gone pretty well. Swim season was over, too, and though Emily loved swimming, the year had been exhausting. She was very happy to relieve the stress of the competition for the summer.

She was eager to share a weekend at the McCullerses' cabin, of course, but she was also a bit anxious. Emily knew that she and Paige had to talk (something they probably should have done long ago), but she also wanted to share a chill weekend with her friends. Somehow, Emily was relieved that Spencer would be there too; She was also intrigued.

Emily had phoned Spencer the day after the meet, and had questioned her friend about her presence in California, but Spencer had been elusive, to say the least. "I will tell you the whole story in person," she had told Emily repeatedly.

Emily's heart skipped a beat when, at the end of a winding road, she spotted the small, red cabin beyond the pine trees. The house had been built by Roy Finlay, Paige's maternal grandfather, more than forty years earlier.

It wasn't big, and it certainly looked a bit worn-out these days, but it was located just on the edge of the water. There was even a small, private dock. The whole place was very charming.

Emily had only been there once before, but she recalled everything, from the swing made from an old tire outside, to the cozy fireplace in the living room, in front of the couch where she and Paige had...

Emily shook her head, in an attempt to chase away the memories.

 _Everything is different now. The past is the past... and we have to move forward._

The front door opened, revealing a beaming Spencer. The slender brunette looked relaxed, barefoot in some navy blue shorts and a loose white shirt. She was also wearing a oversized straw hat on her head.

"Hey Em!" Spencer exclaimed in a cheerful voice. "How was the drive?"

Emily smiled back at her childhood friend.

"All plain sailing," Emily answered, pulling her travel bag out of the trunk. "I love the drive up to the cabin."

"Yeah, it's beautiful," Spencer said. The slender brunette was studying Emily, a half-smile on her face.

"What?" Emily asked, her brow raised.

"Nothing," Spencer said. "It's just... McCullers is gonna faint when she sees you like that. In this outfit, I mean."

"I don't see what you mean," Emily retorded, though she was smiling internally. She had intentionally dressed in some cut off denim shorts which showed off her long, tan legs, and a tight burgundy tank top that left very little to the imagination.

"Where is Paige, by the way?" Emily asked in a casual tone, trying not to sound too eager.

"She's in the backyard, trying to light the barbecue, as far as I know," Spencer explained. "It seems to be a struggle, though. I heard her swearing, earlier. You should go and help her, Em."

"Oh yeah?" Emily asked in the most nonchalant tone she could muster. "Okay then. I'm good at that. My father taught me how to light a fire, you know."

She shot a smile at Spencer and headed for the backyard, her step light and firm, her heart racing in anticipation.


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: You guys, prepare yourself for some emotional Paily moments. The long-awaited talk is coming... at last. But also, some Spaily friendship! ;)**

 **I hope you'll enjoy this chapter!**

 **Thank you so much _Siophiefandom_ for the betareading - and for all the support.**

* * *

 **Lakeport**

"Damned barbecue!" Paige grumbled, pulling her hair in frustration. "Are you going to work now, or not?" she barked at the taunting device.

She heard a light giggle behind her and quickly turned around to discover a grinning Emily.

"Em," Paige stammered, taken aback. "You... you made it."

"Yep, I did," Emily said, her smile widening at the sight of a disheveled Paige, who was sporting a dark mark on her right cheek, probably from the charcoal that was scattered all over the barbecue area.

Added to the fact that the auburn girl was now blushing profusely, it was almost impossible not to laugh at the sight of her, and Emily didn't resist.

Paige did her best to look offended, but quickly began laughing herself.

"I could use some help," she admitted with a sheepish grin. "That... thing won't work. I guess it's as old as the house itself."

Emily took a step forward, and studied the barbecue, head tilted, hands on her hips. "What did you use? Charcoal?" she asked, frowning.

"Well, yeah," Paige answered with a shrug. "Why, is that bad?"

Emily smiled. "No. It's just useless for that kind of barbecue. The simpler, the better. We just need some wood sticks, and a paper torch. And some matches, of course."

She glanced at Paige, who was staring at her, mouth agape.

"Paige?" she asked softly.

"...Uh?" her ex-girlfriend uttered."What?" The truth was that she was having trouble focusing on the task at hand, now that Emily was standing so close to her. Paige's eyes couldn't help but be drawn to the raven-haired girl's half exposed stomach and long, golden legs. _Damn, those shorts are... short._

"Paige?" Emily repeated, biting a smile. "Can you please bring me some matches, and maybe a newspaper?"

"Oh, yeah. Matches. And a paper. Got it, Em," Paige stammered, earning another giggle from Emily.

* * *

Emily put her empty mug on the small garden table and let out a blow of air.

"Wow, Spence," she stammered . "I... I don't know what to say."

Spencer had just revelead to Emily the whole story of why she fled to California. To say that Emily was flabbergasted would be an understatement. She hadn't expected anything like that.

Spencer was looking at the raven-haired girl with worry in her eyes. She knew her childhood friend well enough to realize that Emily wasn't going to judge her, but she couldn't help but feel a little guilty about not telling Emily earlier.

They had always been very close - the same as they were, of course, with Aria and Hanna. Back in Rosewood, the four girls used to share everything that happened in their lives. The mundane things, as well as the major events.

But, as much as Spencer and Emily had had the desire to remain close during their freshman year in college, life had happened, with its ups and downs. And, for both of them, it had been a rocky year, for different reasons.

After a brief silence, Emily got up from her deckchair and leaned over Spencer to hug her. A relieved Spencer relaxed in the embrace, and Emily whispered in her friend's ear: "I love you Spence, no matter what, and I'm so glad you're here now." Spencer just nodded, a lump in her throat. _You're still the sweetest girl, Emily Fields._

Paige was looking at her two friends with a fond smile. She had been on cloud nine since Emily's arrival at the cabin. And, so far, their Saturday had been the perfect summer day.

After Emily had successfully lit the barbecue, they enjoyed some delicious grilled steaks and corn on the cob for lunch, topped off with a fine California red wine.

Emily had brought a rasperry cheesecake from the Blue Bird Café for dessert, and the three girls, their stomachs full, were now quietly sipping their coffees in the backyard, their deckchairs facing the lake.

It had been a much-needed lazy afternoon, after their busy (and complicated) past weeks, and they were really enjoying the peaceful environment, as well as each other's company, of course.

They hadn't planned anything for the afternoon, but Spencer had spotted two old, but still workable, canoes in the small shed adjacent to the cabin.

Being the overachiever she was, she couldn't resist challenging her friends at some canoeing on the lake. Emily politely declined - she knew better than to compete with a Hastings - but Paige eargerly accepted the challenge.

So Emily spent the next half hour or so watching her friends competing, each girl trying to prove to the other one that she was the strongest, and the fastest.

It was highly entertaining, though Emily rolled her eyes more than once at their matching stubbornness.

And Emily was also immensely enjoying the sight of a half-damp, all-sweaty Paige, who was obviously doing her best to impress her.

Paige did a little celebratory dance in her boat when she eventually outperformed Spencer in the last race, almost falling into the water in the process.

"Watch out, McCullers!" Spencer yelled from her own canoe. "Or was that an attempt to impress Emily? Don't think it'll work! And don't forget she's a Shark!"

* * *

 _ **Later that day...**_

Paige and Emily were sitting side by side on the small dock, dipping their feet into the water. There were staring at the sun setting over the lake.

Spencer had headed back to the cabin a while earlier, pretending to be tired, but neither Emily nor Paige had been fooled.

After a few minutes of silence, Paige said, "Remember the last time we were like this? On a dock by a lake, I mean?"

Emily let out a small laugh. "Yeah," she said with a small snort. "It didn't end well. I... I pushed you into the water."

"Well, you were angry," Paige said. "And you had every reason for be. I deserved it."

"Yeah, maybe..." Emily whispered.

"I did," Paige affirmed.

Emily glanced at the auburn girl. "So... we're gonna talk about all this? Now?" she said in a cautious, but hopeful tone.

"Are you okay with that?" Paige simply asked.

"..Yes," Emily answered. "I think it's time." _Though I'm scared as hell._

Emily took a deep breath. "You know, Paige, I don't know where to start, but I'm gonna try, okay?"

Paige just nodded, her throat tight.

"You see," Emily began. "We never really talked about what happened. I mean, _really_ talked. About what... what you did, and about... about how I reacted."

"That's true," Paige said softly.

"And I need... I think I need to tell you how I felt. When you told me, last summer at swim camp," Emily resumed, her voice faltering a little. "I was angry, it's true. But I was also... really heartbroken, Paige."

Paige dipped her head. "I know," she whispered.

"No, Paige," Emily said forcefully. "I don't think you do."

Paige raised her eyes and looked at Emily, taken aback.

"Emily..." she pleaded. "Believe me, I know..."

"No, Paige, let me explain what I mean. That evening at the lake, when you told me about... about the cheating, I couldn't believe it. It was as if everything... everything that had happened between us was a lie, you see?"

Paige shook her head. "It wasn't..." she uttered. "It was true, and real."

"I know," Emily said in a softer voice. "I know that, now. But I was so angry, and so... so desperate. I was... trusting you, you know? With my life."

She glanced at Paige, who now had her face buried in her hands.

"Paige?..."

The auburn girl managed to whisper a small "yes."

"I know it's not easy to hear, but... I need you to understand that you really hurt me."

Paige lowered her hands and stared at Emily. "I'm aware of that, believe me, Emily. As I told you before, there's no excuse for what I did. If I could erase it, I would do it in a hearbeat," she said in a shaky voice.

"It doesn't work like that," Emily observed.

"I know," Paige muttered.

"...But you know, the thing that hurt me the most..." Emily said, "Is not the cheating itself. Well, I mean, it is, of course, but... the fact that you didn't tell me when it happened, that you let me come to that swim camp... that, too, hurt me so much."

"But Emily..." Paige pleaded. "I wanted to tell you before, I swear. It's just that... I was so ashamed of myself... and I wanted you to attend the camp. It was very important for your future."

"Oh come on. Is that the only reason, Paige?"

"Maybe not," Paige acknowledged. "Maybe I wanted you to be there with me, too. I missed you... I so missed you... I thought that maybe, we would reconnect. But I didn't know how to tell you what I had done... though I knew I had to..."

"And you did, eventually," Emily said. "That evening near the lake. After having prepared a picnic for me. Can't you imagine how I felt? Considering one of our first dates in Rosewood was a picnic..."

Paige closed her eyes. "Yes. I'm such an idiot. I see that now," she said in a blank voice.

"...And then you left; right after telling me... you ran away, Paige, you left me there in that place where I didn't know anyone. As if your betrayal wasn't enough. I lost not only my girlfriend that day, but also my best friend. That was the worst, somehow," Emily said somberly.

Paige nodded, not able to say a word. She was having trouble fighting tears.

"I did that for you, Emily. I thought it was the best thing to do. But I guess I was wrong, again."

"It was as if... you gave up on us," Emily explained. "You didn't even try... to talk to me, to fix it."

Paige let out a big sigh. "I know... but you told me to go to hell. That evening by the lake, you made your point very clearly. You didn't want to see me anymore, ever, Emily."

"I was angry!" Emily said vehemently. "I was angry, and... and desperate, as I told you. And maybe I said... mean things. But that was in the heat of the moment. But you... you didn't even try to reach out to me after that. I waited for days, for weeks, months even. And you never called."

Paige stared at Emily in disbelief.

"You... you wanted me to call you? Even after what I did to you?"

Emily sniffled. "Well, yeah," she said in a croaked voice. "Didn't you know that, Paige?"

Paige shook her head. "No," she said in a pleading tone. "I didn't know, Em. I thought... I thought that you really hated me. That you had stopped loving me."

"I tried," Emily said in a shaky voice. "Believe me, I tried, Paige. But... I failed, I guess."

"Really?" Paige asked, her heart pounding in her chest. "You failed? What about all your... Berkeley girlfriends? Not that I blame you for that," she added quickly.

Emily winced. "They weren't that many. Okay, I had a few crazy nights. And... a few hooks-up," she admitted. "But that wasn't important. That was me, being angry. And trying to convince myself that love wasn't worth it anymore."

"Because of me," Paige said, ashamed. "I ruined that, too. Your faith in love."

Emily frowned. "No. You can't say that. You can't take all the blame. I'm an adult. I knew what I was doing. Or at least, I should have."

"But you acted like that because of what I did in the first place," Paige objected. "It wasn't the real you. The real Emily."

Emily couldn't help but bite a smile. "...You've always seen me as a saint, Paige. But I'm not," she said softly. "I'm not perfect."

"Probably not, but... you are, to me," Paige said. "And I know I said it before, but I have to say it again. I'm sorry, Emily, I'm so, so sorry. For everything."

Emily just nodded, her throat tight.

"And I want you to know," Paige said, "that I will never betray you again. Never. I swear, Emily," she said with force. "Do you believe me now?"

"...Yes," Emily managed to whisper, though she was almost crying. "Yes, I believe you."

"Good," Paige said, wiping her own eyes.

The two girls remained silent for a while, until Emily resumed talking.

"Paige, I... I have to make amends, too. For how I treated you, after that day at the Blue Bird. You wanted to talk, to explain, and I didn't let you."

"It was understandable," Paige said. "I never blamed you for that, Emily."

The raven-haired girl smiled fondly. "I know. You never do. Maybe _you're_ the real saint, after all, Paige McCullers."

"I'm not," Paige affirmed with force, shaking her head. "I'm no angel."

"Neither am I," Emily countered. She glanced at Paige, who was still staring at the lake in front of her.

Another silence settled between them, but this time, Paige spoke first.

"So, what now?" she asked, her voice barely a whisper. "Where do we go from here?"

Emily sighed. "I don't know... but...there's another thing that I wanted to ask you. It's not easy either..." she said cautiously.

"Anything, Emily," Paige said earnestly.

"How come... how come you never told me about your little brother? About Ryan?" Emily asked.

Paige stared at her, dumbfounded. "I... I didn't?"

"No," Emily confirmed. "You never mentioned him to me. I found out that you had a brother when... when your mom told me about Ryan, during my first stay in Oakland," she explained. "And I know that you told Spencer about him. But you

never said anything to me. Not once. As if... you didn't trust me enough."

Paige dipped her head. "You know, Emily," she said in a hoarse voice. "I didn't realize that. I never wanted to hide that from you. Not on purpose, at least. But you see, talking about Ryan... about his death... it's still painful. Even now, so many years later," she confessed.

"I understand," Emily assured her. "But you know you can tell me anything, right? I want to know all about you, Paige. The good, the bad. What happened to you. Everything that made you what you are now," she explained. "The Paige McCullers I... the girl I love," she concluded in a whisper, her heart pounding.

"You... you still love me?" Paige asked in a hoarse voice. "You really do, Em?"

"Of course I do, you dummy," Emily said. "You really had to make me say it, right?" she said, rolling her eyes.

"Oh yeah," Paige croaked. "I think I did. I needed you to say it, Em. Because you know, I never stopped loving you. And I never will. I love you too, Emily."

Emily let out a relieved laugh, finally allowing the tears to fall from her eyes. Paige leaned forward and softly grazed Emily's cheek with a trembling hand, in an attempt to wipe the tears. "Em," she whispered. "Em, please don't cry."

Emily nodded, and closed her eyes, sniffling. Paige closed the gap between them and softly, tenderly, kissed Emily's eyelids first, then her nose, then her lips.

The kiss was chaste, almost reverent, but Emily felt butterflies swarming in her stomach. _Oh god, I so missed that._

She let herself go in Paige's embrace, the auburn girl wrapping her in her arms.

Paige didn't try to deepen the kiss, but instead reached for Emily's ear, whispering soothing, loving words.

They didn't need to talk about the past anymore. All they needed was to be in each other's arms, the last beams of the setting sun playing on their skin, the only sound the water lapping softly at the small dock.

* * *

When Spencer joined them outside, an hour later, the two girls were still embracing, Emily's head on Paige's shoulder, Paige's arm securely wrapped around Emily's waist.

They seemed to be in their own world, and Spencer, who didn't want to interrupt their moment, slowly began to head back to the cabin.

"Hey Spence," Emily's voice said from behind, startling the slender brunette. "It's okay, you can join us. We're fine."

Spencer smiled brightly and sat down next to her friends. "Yeah, I can see that," she teased. "You two seem perfectly fine."

Paige glanced at Spencer. "We are," she confirmed, a dreamy look on her face.

Emily giggled and gave Paige a quick peck on the cheek first, then another one on the lips. "You're so adorable," she whispered, and Paige stared at her in awe.

Spencer coughed. "Okay, lovebirds," she began. "Do you need some time alone? I mean... for you know what," she said, her tone light and teasing.

Emily's eyes widened, while Paige's face turned beet red.

"Spencer," Emily chastened. "Are you turning into Hanna, or what?"

Spencer rolled her eyes. "Please don't ever say that again, Em. It's just... if you two need some privacy, I can always take Paige's car back to Oakland..."

"Spence," Paige's husky voice interrupted, "You don't have to go anywhere. We're spending the weekend here, the three of us. If you don't mind, um, a little public display of affection every now and then?" she said, winking at Spencer.

"I don't mind at all, McCullers," Spencer deadpanned. "As a matter of fact, I really need my vicarious smoochies, since my love life is such a disaster."

Emily disentangled herself from Paige's arms, and reached for Spencer, giving the slim brunette a warm hug.

"Spencer," she said. "I'm so sorry you were hurt."

"Don't be," Spencer answered. "It's not your fault. And I'm glad to have you here. To have you both," she added, glancing at Paige.

The auburn girl gave her friend a grateful smile, and stared back at Emily, who was sporting her signature dimpled smile.

Paige felt as if her heart were bursting out of her chest from joy. _Is it possible to feel this happy?..._


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N : Hello everyone ! You're reading this Friday update thanks to the awesome** _ **siophiefandom**_ **who did the betareading, along with some very wise (and very appropriate !) edits. Thank you so much ! :) ;)**

 **I also want to thank everyone who's still reading, and reviewing of course. I'm always eager to hear what you think. Whenever I have doubts about this story (and about my writing, more generally), your feedbacks are really, really helping me. I feel so blessed to have such great readers!**

 **By the way, thank you** _ **Guest**_ **for telling me your opinion about Emily (who should not be the one to apologize in chapter 16). I get your point but I think that Paige really did apologize, and that she came clean for that matter. But maybe she should have explained to Em how she was really feeling the night of the cheating – hurting after the fight with her dad ?... Anyway, thank you so much for telling me honestly what you think. I value every opinion !**

* * *

 _ **La**_ _ **keport - Saturday night**_

"Kiss me again. But for real, this time," Emily asked with a pout.

A playful smile spread across Paige's lips. She leaned over Emily and let her mouth softly graze the raven-haired girl's cheek.

"Paige," Emily moaned softly, her eyes half-closed. She felt Paige's smile widening, and she parted her lips, allowing Paige's tongue to graze her upper lip, and then enter her mouth.

 _At last,_ Emily thought. Paige had taken some delight in teasing her from the moment they both retired to the cabin's master bedroom for the night. Up to that point, their make-out session had barely been PG-13. And that was beginning to drive Emily crazy.

Soon, their kiss deepened, their tongues now melting. Emily grabbed Paige's neck and pulled her closer. Paige let out a husky groan and let one of her hands wander across Emily's back and slide under her top, while the other one stroked Emily's hair.

They parted only when oxygen became an issue. Their breath short, Paige and Emily stared at each other, their foreheads touching their smiles matching.

"Em," a flustered Paige whispered, "Em, this is really, really good, but... I'm not sure that we should... Spencer is in the next room," she reminded the raven-haired girl.

"She said she doesn't mind," Emily muttered, before kissing Paige's neck, grazing her teeth against the smooth skin.

Paige shivered in pleasure. "Yeah, I know she did, but..." she said, "If we continue, we won't be able to stop, and I'm not sure Spencer's ready to hear... well, you know..."

Emily leaned back a little and pouted at Paige. "We can be quiet," she countered, earning an eyebrow quirk from Paige.

"Well, I can, maybe," Paige said. "But you're more... vocal, if I remember correctly," she said with a playful wink.

"What?" Emily said in mock-offense. "Are you accusing me of inappropriate behavior?"

"Well… yes. In certain situations, your behavior is quite inappropriate," Paige retorted. "But that's a good thing, because in those situations, I want you to be a little inappropriate, Emily Fields."

"Oh really?" Emily asked with a smug grin.

"Really," Paige deadpanned. "But... just not... not right now, okay? Do you mind if tonight, we just.. limit ourselves to some kissing and snuggling?" she ventured.

She glanced at Emily, fearing that the other girl would be disappointed, or even mad at her.

But Emily's eyes were smiling.

"Okay, McCullers. Some kissing and snuggling are fine with me... for now. But you'll have to make it up to me soon," Emily sighed in an over-dramatic fashion.

"Oh, I hope so," Paige grinned.

* * *

Spencer entered the main room and smiled indulgently at the sight of a pajama-clad Emily, who was humming softly while cooking something on the stove.

"Hey Em," she said. "Happy morning, I guess?"

The raven-haired girl turned back and beamed at her childhood friend.

"Hey Spence," she answered in a giddy tone. "Yep, it's a definitely a good day. I'm making blueberry pancakes; Paige really does love them. Do you want some?"

"Look at you, up bright and early on a Sunday morning and making breakfast for your girl," Spencer teased.

She had already spotted all the food on the countertop -not only pancakes, but also fruit salad and cereal, along with a pot of fresh coffee. "I'm really impressed, Em."

"Well, yeah," Emily said with a small shrug, her cheeks slightly flushed. "It's nothing."

"Uh huh," Spencer said with a knowing smirk.

She took a seat at the kitchen counter and grabbed a mug. "I thought I smelled coffee, that's why I got up," she explained.

"Of course Spence, help yourself," Emily said with a bright smile. She turned her attention back to the stove. "Oh god, I wanted to make perfect, round pancakes," she whined. "This one's got a funny shape. It's anything but round."

"Well, I'm sure McCullers will eat it anyway," Spencer deadpanned. "She'll probably eat anything you put in front of her," she added, earning an eye roll from Emily. "Sorry Em, that came out rather wrong. Well, you know what I mean."

"Drink your coffee, Spencer," Emily retorted, her tone stern, but her eyes smiling.

Spencer nodded and took a sip of her beverage. "Perfect," she sighed, her eyes half-closed. "Just the way I like it. You're quite the perfect housewife now, Em. Paigey is so lucky," she teased.

Emily threw a dishcloth at the slim brunette, who swiflty managed to dodge it. "Stop it, right now. And what a sexist stereotype, Spence. Especially coming from you, of all people."

"Oh come on Em, you know I'm kidding. But where is Paige, by the way?" Spencer asked.

"Oh, she's still sleeping," Emily said.

"Really? She's not out for her usual morning run? Wow Em, you must have really worn her out last night!"

This time, Spencer wasn't able to avoid the wet kitchen towel that was thrown at her.

"Hey!" she whined. "Seriously, Em! This thing is damp, and dirty!"

"You deserved it," Emily affirmed, but her eyes were smiling. "And it's not any of your business, but... just so you know... well, nothing happened last night, Spence."

"Oh, really?" Spencer asked, looking a little disappointed. "But... you're good, right?"

"We're more than good," Emily said, her smile even brighter than before. "We spent the night cuddling and talking, mostly. And... making out a little, but nothing serious."

"It's not because of me, is it?" Spencer asked. "I know I'm right in the next room, but... I have earplugs, and I'm a heavy sleeper anyway."

Emily rolled her eyes and shook her head fondly.

"You're anything but a heavy sleeper, Spencer Hastings. Don't forget, I've known you all my life."

"Okay, okay. Anyway, you get my point, Em. Don't mind me, and do... what you have to do with your girl. You know, I'm so happy for both of you."

Emily walked to her friend and gave her a tight hug.

"Thank you, Spence," she said softly. "Thanks for being here, and... for everything."

"You're welcome, Em," Spencer answered, hugging Emily back.

"...So what, is it still hug-time?" Paige's husky voice interrupted them. "Can I join? Or are you two just trying to make me jealous?"

Emily let go of Spencer and glowed at the sight of her girlfriend. Paige had sleepy eyes and disheveled hair, but she had never looked so beautiful, in Emily's opinion.

"Hey, babe," Emily beamed.

"Hey, love," Paige beamed back.

They were both wearing the same dreamy smile on their face, Spencer remarked with satisfaction. _Hanna and Aria will be delighted too,_ _when I tell them_ _. The Paily train is back on track._ _.._

* * *

Spencer hung up her cell phone and walked back into the cabin, a slight frown on her face.

"Spence? Is everything all right?" Emily asked, concerned. Spencer had gone outside to answer Melissa's phone call while Emily and Paige were doing the dishes (and exchanging kisses) after breakfast.

"Yes... no... well, I'm afraid I have to go back to the Bay Area right now" Spencer said with a tight smile.

"What? Now? But why?"Paige exclaimed.

Spencer sighed. "Well, apparently, my mother is in San Francisco today. Waiting to meet me. To quote Melissa, she wants to make me an offer."

"An... an offer?" Paige asked, confused. "What does that mean?"

Spencer shrugged. "It means that, in true Hastings fashion, my parents are offering me a deal. A way to redeem myself after… after what happened in UPenn."

The slim brunette took a seat on the worn-out couch and took her head in her hands. "Shit," she muttered through her teeth. "I knew this was going to happen. But why now?"

Emily came near her friend and kneeled beside her. "Spence," she said softly. "You don't have to go if you don't want to. Can't you call your sister back, and tell her you'll see your mother another time?"

"It will only delay the inevitable," Spencer said somberly. "And Melissa came out to California with her, by the way. She said that she'll stand up for me. And that the deal my parents are offering is... is a really good one."

Paige and Emily exchanged worried looks.

"...So?" Paige asked after a brief silence. "What do you want to do, Spencer?"

Spencer clenched her jaw and raised her head. "I have to go back today," she affirmed. "I have to face my parents, and better sooner than later. My mother is only here for one day, apparently. She's got a trial starting on Monday in Boston, according to Melissa."

"Do you want us to go with you?" Emily asked. "Cause we could totally..."

"No," Spencer cut her off. "No, I want you two to stay here. You deserve your... your time together. Please don't let my family ruin that, too."

She turned her eyes to the auburn girl who was staring at her with a worried look.

"Paige, can I borrow your car? You two can drive back to the Bay Area tomorrow morning in Em's car, right?"

"Of course," Paige confirmed. "But Spencer... if you need us, for anything... remember that we're just a phone call away."

* * *

After Spencer's departure, the rest of the Sunday went by in a flash. Paige and Emily spent most of the afternoon bathing and swimming in the lake, stopping only when the sun went down.

They had kept in touch with Spencer through a few texts, and though their friend hadn't revealed many details about the meeting with her mother, they knew that she was okay.

"Oh wow, I didn't realize it was so late," Emily exclaimed while wrapping herself in her beach towel. "We should head back inside. Do you want me to cook something quick? A nice omelet maybe? We still have eggs in the fridge, right?"

Paige smiled fondly at the raven-haired girl. "Yes, we do. But Em, you don't have to cook all my meals for me. You already made breakfast."

"Oh, but I love cooking," Emily said eagerly. "Especially when it's for you."

Paige's smile grew wider. She reached for Emily's hand and stroked it lovingly.

"I know, Em. And I love it. But... I had something else in mind for tonight."

"Oh yeah?" Emily said, raising an eyebrow suggestively.

"Not that!" Paige protested, blushing slightly. "Well, I mean... I wasn't implying anything... we... we'll do whatever you want..." she stammered.

"Uh huh," Emily said knowingly, trying not to laugh at Paige's babbling.

"But you know... the night is still young, and... I would like to take you out tonight," Paige said in one breath.

"Oh, okay," Emily simply said. She couldn't help but feel slightly disappointed. She had imagined a quiet evening in front of the cozy fireplace, curled up in Paige's arms; a nice prelude for what would come next -or not- in the bedroom. She knew that wanting to recreate their first time was unrealistic - and probably not very wise _._

Paige was studying Emily. It was easy to tell what the girl in front of her was thinking.

"Emily," she said softly. "There's no pressure, for anything. It's just... there's a place I'd like to take you tonight," she explained. "I think... I think you will love it. And if you don't, we can always leave."

* * *

Since it was her surprise, Paige drove Emily's car to their destination. It wasn't far away from the cabin - maybe two or three miles. Emily couldn't hide her excitement when she spotted the big sign at the entrance of the large, flat plot of ground, surrounded by magnolias and oak trees.

"A drive-in movie theater!" she exclaimed. "Wow, I didn't even know they still existed! Is it still open for business?"

"It's called the Lakeport Auto Movies Drive-In," Paige said. "It's one of the oldest drive-in theaters in the county. And of course it's still open for business. I checked online."

"It's a little... rustic," Emily observed. "But it's quite charming, too," she quickly added when she saw Paige's smile faltering a little. "And it's not crowded."

There were only a few other cars besides theirs, which wasn't really surprising considering it was Sunday night and that the summer season hadn't started yet.

Paige parked the car in a spot not far from the screen, but slightly off to the side. She went to buy the tickets and came back to the car carrying some drinks, some popcorn and two hot dogs.

Emily had already reclined the front seats. Paige shot her a smile as she put the tray between them. "Hey," she said. "They also have really good ice-cream, but I thought we could get some later. If we're still hungry, that is."

"Ice-cream?" Emily asked, her eyes shining. "I'm sure I can save some room for ice-cream."

Paige grinned and leaned over to peck Emily's lips. "You really have a sweet tooth, don't you?" she said fondly.

"I do," Emily confirmed. "I love sweet things," she whispered in Paige's ear, her tone seductive. "Like your lips. They're so sweet, and soft." Her mouth moved from Paige's ear to her lips, making the auburn girl shiver.

But Emily didn't deepen the kiss. She leaned back, a mischievous glint in her eyes.

"Em," Paige whined. "Don't tease."

"What?" Emily said in the most innocent tone she could muster. "Aren't we here to watch a movie? And what movie, by the way?"

"Um, I... I don't know, actually," Paige said, taken aback. She quickly took a look at the tickets. "Oh, it's an old one. 'Raising Arizona'. Never seen it... But it should be good; it's directed by the Coen brothers."

"I'm sure it'll be great," Emily approved. "Anyway, I'm kidding, Paige. I don't care that much about the movie. And I'm pretty sure you don't,either," she said with a crooked smile, earning a chuckle from a relieved Paige.

They didn't see much of the film that night, but, as Emily had said, the movie wasn't really the point. They took full advantage of the semi-darkness and the empty spots near their car. As the closing credits rolled, they were busy making out in the back seat. Paige was on top, her hands roaming under Emily's unbuttoned shirt, while Emily kissed her fiercely, one hand running through Paige's disheveled auburn hair, the other one squeezing her jean-clad butt.

They were so carried away that they didn't even realize that their car was the last one on the drive-in lot. They had to stop, though, when they heard a soft knock at the car window. Paige jerked away from Emily, startled, and blinked at the harsh light that was directed right at her face. Someone was standing near the car, and Paige, after a brief moment of panic, let out a sigh of relief when she recognized the intruder. She rolled down the car window and smiled sheepishly at the old man.

"Hey Hank," Paige said. "I didn't know that you still worked here. I'm sorry, we um... kinda lost... track of time. We're gonna leave right now."

"Yes, that would be appropriate," the grey-haired man nodded. He didn't seemed mad at all, but he was visibly trying not to stare at Emily, who was busy straightening up her clothes.

"We're leaving," Paige repeated. "Sorry, Hank."

"Good," the man approved, relieved. "Are you staying at the cabin, Paige?"

"Yes, we are. We're spending the weekend there. Oh, this is Emily, by the way," Paige said. "My... my girlfriend," she said, her voice a little hesitant, but definitely proud.

"Hello, Miss," the man said in a polite tone. "Nice to, um, meet you. Now Paige, have a nice evening, and drive back safely, okay?"

"I will," Paige promised. "Thank you, Hank. It was nice to see you again. And tell Tammy I said hello?"

The man nodded with a smile, and turned away from the car.

Paige gave Emily a sheepish look. "Sorry, Em. That was Hank, I've... I've known him since I was a kid. This is the first time he's caught me like this, though."

"Like this ? You mean, making out in the back of a car like horny teenagers?" Emily teased. "Not sure I'm buying that, McCullers."

Paige's eyes widened. "Emily, I swear... this is the first time I've brought a... a girl here," she stammered.

Emily raised her eyebrows. "Oh, so that's all I am now? A _girl_? A minute ago, you used the GF word!"

Paige looked liked a deer caught in headlights, and Emily couldn't help bursting into laughter.

"Oh come on, Paige. I'm kidding. We'll worry about labels later, okay?... For now, you have to drive us back to the cabin. And not only because _Hank_ told us so... But mostly, because I can't wait to have my way with you, McCullers," she winked.

Paige gulped and jumped back to the front seat, hastily starting the ignition.


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Hello wonderful readers! Here is a new chapter, with some Paily fluff, of course, but also some McHastings friendship. Enjoy and review!**

 **Thank you s** _ **iophiefandom**_ **for the wonderful betareading and the useful tips about Stanford, college applications, and everything else!**

* * *

 **Lakeport - Monday morning**

Paige and Emily were lying in bed, their bodies entangled between the sheets. The sun had long since risen, but they had no idea what time it was. And to be honest, they couldn't have cared less.

"Define last night in one word," Emily asked with doe eyes. The auburn girl beamed at her.

"Amazing. Tremendous. Spectacular. Incredible," Paige listed.

"One word, Paige!" Emily chuckled.

"Okay," Paige said with a over-dramatic sigh. "...Stellar."

"Stellar?" Emily repeated with a broad smile. "Really?"

"Really," Paige confirmed. She leaned in to kiss Emily's swollen lips one more time. "What would _you_ say? About last night?" she whispered in her low, husky voice.

"Nice," Emily said with a playful shrug.

"Nice?" Paige exclaimed. "Nice?! Really, Fields?..."

She pinched Emily's hip, and then started to tickle her fiercely, earning a loud shriek from the tanner girl.

"Okay, okay!" Emily yelped in pain. "Stop it, Paige! ...Okay, it was... it was mind-blowing," she admitted after catching her breath.

Paige's smile widened. "Really? I gave you mind-blowing sex?"

"We gave each other mind-blowing sex," Emily corrected. "It takes two to tango, you know."

"And what a tango," Paige said, a goofy grin on her face.

"You seem very satisfied," Emily observed.

"I am," Paige confirmed with a smug smile.

"I meant, satisfied with yourself," Emily chuckled.

"That, too," Paige said, before rolling over on top of Emily and kissing her neck just behind her ear, making the other girl shiver.

Morning could wait.

* * *

Later, Paige brought Emily breakfast in bed, consisting of some fresh coffee and homemade waffles. She had also arranged a few wild flowers in a small vase on the tray.

"They're from the back garden," she explained to Emily.

"They're beautiful, Paige," Emily beamed. She leaned over to give Paige a soft peck on her lips.

"...You know, Em," Paige said. "I've been thinking. I should come here more often. To the cabin, I mean."

"Oh, definitely," Emily approved while taking a bite of her waffle. She wiggled her eyebrows at Paige.

"Not for that," Paige grinned. "Well, not only for that. To tell you the truth, Em, I was talking about the garden. It's been a mess since... now that my mom isn't here to take care of it anymore. She loved her gardening, you know?"

She had tried to keep her tone light, but Emily wasn't fooled. She hadn't missed the hint of sadness in Paige's eyes.

Emily put the breakfast tray aside and reached for Paige's hand, urging the other girl to sit on the bed next to her. "Paige," she said softly. "It's okay to be sad."

Paige shot her a weak smile. "Sorry, Em. I didn't want to kill the mood."

"You didn't," Emily assured her. "You didn't, Paige. I told you before, I want to share everything with you. The good _and t_ he bad. I'll be there with you, whenever and wherever you need me. And I think that the gardening thing is a beautiful idea. Your mother would be proud."

* * *

 **Oakland - Monday afternoon**

Spencer moved her bishop to block her opponent's king.

"Checkmate," she said with a proud grin.

Nick McCullers let out a frustrated groan. "Well," he said. "You're certainly a tough player. It's been a while since I've lost a game of chess"

"I was lucky, " Spencer admitted. "That last move you made with your knight -very impressive. It could have worked."

"But it didn't," Nick stated. "As I said, you're very good. How long have you been playing?"

"Oh, I don't know, sir, since... forever, I guess," Spencer said with a small smile. "My father taught me".

"Well, he taught you well," Nick observed.

Spencer shrugged. "Yeah, well... he's a lawyer, you know. So, playing chess is basically his job, I guess. In a figurative way, of course."

She lowered her head, feeling sad all of a sudden. She could feel Nick's inquisitive stare on her.

After a brief silence, the older man cleared his throat.

"Anyway, it was a real pleasure to play against you today, Spencer."

Spencer nodded and shot him a brief but thankful smile.

Just then, the front door opened, and Paige barged into the living room, carrying her travel bag and an armful of wildflowers.

"Oh, hi," Paige beamed at the sight of her father and her friend. She was positively glowing, Spencer couldn't help but notice. _Well, I guess things with Em went... beyond well._

"Hello, Paige," Nick McCullers said in an even tone. "I see that you're back from your long weekend."

He hadn't put an emphasis on the adjective, but Paige tensed a bit at her father's words. It was Monday afternoon after all, and her father had probably expected to see her back home earlier.

"Well, yeah," she winced. "Sorry, dad, I should have told you that I'd be late, but..."

Nick shook his head. "It's okay. Spencer here told me that you and Emily had to... catch up."

Paige's eyes darted to Spencer, who just shrugged.

"Um, yes, we... we did. Everything's fine," Paige stammered, feeling her cheeks grow warm.

"Good," her father approved. His face was, as always, almost unreadable, but his eyes were sparkling with amusement, Paige realized with astonishment. _What the hell happened to my father?..._

Spencer saved Paige from further embarrassment when she asked her whether she wanted some help unpacking. It was clearly a pretext, since Paige had barely been gone three days, but Paige jumped at the chance to talk to her friend alone. She was dying to know what exactly had happened between Spencer and her mother the day before.

Once in Paige's room upstairs, Spencer took a seat at Paige's desk, while Paige sat cross-legged on her bed.

"So, Spence, how did it really go?" Paige asked, a concerned look on her face. On Sunday evening, Spencer had texted her that she was fine, but Paige suspected that Spencer just hadn't wanted to ruin her time with Emily.

Spencer cleared her throat. "Well," she said. "It was... tense, to say the least. But... I think that we came up with a more than acceptable solution. And I have the feeling that you will like it, too. I hope so, at least".

"Oh yeah?" a relieved Paige asked, her eyes widening. "Tell me everything!"

"Well," Spencer began, "this is what happened..."

* * *

 _ **One day earlier - Hotel St. Regis, San Francisco.**_

Spencer took a deep breath and entered the hotel lobby. Her throat tight, she walked up to the reception desk and asked the clerk, "Veronica Hastings, please?"

The middle-aged man behind the desk shot her a polite smile. "Yes, Miss. One moment, please."

He took a look at his computer screen and said: "Um, are you her daughter Spencer?... Mrs. Hastings is already waiting for you in one of our private lounges. It's just over there," he added, motioning to his right.

Spencer thanked him and headed to the lounge, looking all around her. The place was definitely fancy. Nothing extravagant, but really elegant. _Very Hastings_ , Spencer thought. She had spent numerous weekends and vacations with her parents in places like it throughout the years, all around the country.

But things felt different this time. Somehow, when she had left for California, Spencer had distanced herself not only from her family, but also from this privileged world. It had only been a few weeks, but Spencer had the feeling that things had changed a lot. That _she_ had changed a lot.

That did not prevent her from being very nervous, though. Her hands clammy, her stomach queasy, she entered the cozy private lounge and froze when she spotted her mother. As always, the older woman looked flawless, in her navy blue suit and her discreet, but pricey silk scarf.

Veronica Hastings stood up and walked over to her daughter. "Spencer," she simply said in an even tone, before giving the slender brunette a brief hug. Spencer couldn't help but stiffen. Her last interaction with her mother, back in Rosewood, had been less than cordial, and Spencer didn't really know where they stood now.

"Hello mom,"she muttered, before taking a step back, her eyes down. Veronica Hastings was studying her daughter, her brows slightly furrowed, but her expression neutral.

"You seem to be doing well, Spencer," she said. "Though your outfit is a bit... casual. But I guess that's your... Californian look?"

Spencer gritted her teeth. She was still wearing the casual denim skirt and the short sleeve blouse she had on - along with some sandals- when she got the phone call from her sister, a few hours earlier.

"Well, I was spending the weekend with some friends, at a cabin by a lake," she countered. "I wasn't expecting Melissa's call. Where is she, by the way?"

"Oh, don't worry, your sister will join us soon," Veronica Hastings said. "I just wanted to talk to you alone for a minute. Take a seat, Spencer. Do you want a drink? They have really good Pomegranate coolers here."

Spencer rolled her eyes. "No, mom, I don't want a Pomegranate cooler. I want to know why exactly you have in mind."

Veronica Hastings clenched her jaw. "We're going to talk about that, of course, Spencer. But that doesn't mean that we can't be civil, right?"

"Right," Spencer acknowledged. "Sorry."

She took a seat in front of her mother, and fidgeted with the napkin on the table, not knowing what to say next. She could feel her mother's eyes on her. Veronica Hastings had her poker face on - the one she wore when she was presenting a case in court.

"So, Spencer," Veronica began after a brief silence. "Your father and I would like to make you an offer. Something that, we think, will... suit everyone."

"Everyone," Spencer mumbled. "Including me?"

"Of course, Spencer," her mother said in her best lawyer voice. "You know, we worked hard to find an acceptable solution to... to your situation."

"My situation," Spencer repeated. "Nice way to describe that... that mess."

"Your words, not mine," the older Hastings countered. "Anyway, Spencer, my main concern is you. Your father and I are really worried about you."

Spencer shot her mother a doubtful look. "About me, or about the Hastingses' reputation?"

"Spencer," Veronica Hastings chastised, "I don't know exactly when you turned into this rebellious child, but it's a little late for that, don't you think? You're almost twenty now."

Spencer cringed. That was a Hastings thing; always reminding their offspring that they were supposed to act a certain way - and that they were either too mature to act childish, or too young to make decisions for themselves. I _'m so tired of that_ , Spencer thought.

"Yes, Mom, I will turn twenty soon, and that also means that I can take my own decisions," she snapped.

"And what decisions are you talking about, Spencer, may I ask? The ones you made during freshman year, and that turned out to be so... so disastrous?" Veronica said, her voice rising slightly. "Or the one you made more recently, to run away to another state, like... like a fugitive?"

Spencer shook her head vigorously. "You know what? That may have been the best decision I ever made. As you said, I'm not a child anymore. And do I have to remind you what you and dad told me before I left?" she said in a more emotional voice than she intended. She could feel that she was close to tears, something that she wanted to avoid at all costs.

Veronica sighed deeply. "Spencer. Believe it or not, we do care about you. I know that some things were... said, in the heat of the moment, when we heard about your... your affair. But you're still our daughter, Spencer, and we really want the best for you."

"And what is the best for me, according to you and dad?" Spencer asked in a wry tone.

"We think," Veronica said in a calmer voice, "that you need a fresh start. Since you seem to be loving California so much, we figured that the best option was to find a way for you to settle here. Thanks god, your father and I also have some... connections at Stanford."

Spencer frowned. "Stanford?"

"Yes. It's an excellent university, even though it's not Ivy League. And your friend Paige also goes there, right?... Anyway, your father and I made a few calls, and... a few arrangements. Long story short, Spencer, you've got a spot in Stanford next semester, and, in four years, assuming you can avoid any more... questionable decisions, you'll have a spot in the law school." Spencer couldn't help rolling her eyes at the way that her mother snuck in that dig about questionable decisions.

" But," Veronica continued, "you'll be starting there as a freshman. Let's say that your year at UPenn... never happened."

"What do you mean?" Spencer asked, puzzled.

"We did what we had to do to... wipe the state clean," her mother answered. "Your name isn't even in the UPenn register anymore. As I said, it's as if you never went there."

"What about... what about social media?" Spencer stammered.

"Well, let's say that, from now on, anyone who tries to post personal or offensive things about you will be prosecuted," Veronica stated. "And whatever was posted before on social media... has been expunged," she concluded.

Spencer shook her head. "That's... that's crazy," she muttered. "It can be that simple."

"Oh, believe me, it wasn't simple," her mother retorted. "And it cost a lot, too."

"Sorry for being such a burden," Spencer couldn't help spitting out.

"Spencer," her mother warned. "Save the sarcasm, please. You're in no position to negotiate. You still need us, especially financially. About that - we will pay for your tuition at Stanford, and for your housing. But you'll have to be responsible for your other expenses. That means you'd better get a part-time job, or a student loan. Or both."

Spencer was staring at her mother, at a loss for words. What Veronica was offering seemed to be a more than acceptable solution. Still, agreeing to it would mean that Spencer would be indebted to her parents. _They're deciding for me, as usual..._

"What if I don't agree?" Spencer ventured.

Veronica Hastings raised a brow at her daughter. "Well, I don't really think you have any other options, do you, Spencer? You can't live at your friend's house forever. By the way, if you are going to spend the summer there, I think that we should compensate Paige and her father. Or, if you prefer, we can find you a room to rent in the Bay Area."

Spencer stood up suddenly, startling her mother. "I... I have to go out for a minute," she stammered. "Would you excuse me?"

She rushed outside the room, tears welling in her eyes. _What was I expecting? Of course, they thought of everything. Of course, they made all the choices for me. And of course, I have no other options._

She had almost reached the main lobby when she felt a hand grabbing her wrist.

"Spencer," said a familiar voice, and the slim brunette, startled, turned around to face her sister.

"Melissa," she croaked. "Where were you?"

"Mom told me you wouldn't be here for an hour or so," Melissa explained. "So, I took a quick nap."

Spencer snorted. "Well, she told me that you agreed to let her talk to me alone. I guess she lied... Or at least, she played us," she concluded bitterly.

"Spencer," Melissa said. "I'm sorry... I should have known better. What did Mom tell you?"

Spencer ran a hand through her hair. "Well, you already know everything, don't you? About the deal?"

"Yes," Melissa acknowledged. "And as I told you on the phone, I think that's a pretty good deal."

"Probably... but once again, it's _their_ decision. Not mine," Spencer said, her voice breaking a little.

"Hey," Melissa whispered, concerned. She pulled her sister to the nearest chair, and sat beside her. "Spencer, listen to me. I know it's difficult. Right now, you're feeling that our parents want to control your life, as they always have. This is partly true. But Spencer, it doesn't have to be all or nothing. Sometimes, a good compromise is the best solution."

Spencer sniffled. "You think so?" she asked in a small voice.

Melissa nodded. "Yes. I really do. Now, Spence, would you like to take a walk with me? I could use some fresh air, and I bet that you could, too. I'll text Mom not to worry."

Less than an hour later, a soothed Spencer, accompanied by Melissa, rejoined their mother at the St Regis. She had decided to accept her parent's deal, but on one condition: she didn't want to study law anymore. Spencer didn't know what she wanted to do for a living yet, but she definitely knew that she didn't want to be a lawyer like her parents or her sister.

It took some time, and all of Melissa's negotiating skills, but Veronica Hastings eventually agreed. Spencer was going to study at Stanford the next semester, as her parents had planned, but with full freedom to choose her major - and her future career.


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: Guys, sorry for the long wait. I know that I haven't updated this fic for a month, and I'm really sorry about that. I'm not gonna lie: I had a major case of writer's block. This chapter was a real struggle to write. I almost thought about giving up.**

 **Thank you so much to _siophiefandom_ for helping me with my doubts about this story, and, as always, for the awesome betareading. You guys, you can thank her too! ;)**

 **I really hope that you wonderful readers are still here to read and enjoy this story. I promise that you won't have to wait that long for next chapter... if you're still interested, that is.**

 **I really think that the awesome Paily fandom needs fanfiction - now more than ever, and you all know why.**

* * *

 _ **Oakland - Saturday**_

"...It's good to see our Paigey happy again, right?" said a soft voice.

Nick McCullers, startled, turned to the young woman behind him: a smiling, very pregnant Nora, who was handing him a beer.

"Yes, it is," the middle-aged man acknowledged, dipping his head in a way very similar to Paige.

Nick took the drink he was offered and shot Nora an uneasy smile, not knowing exactly what to say to the woman. They barely knew each other, and Nick had been most surprised when his brother-in-law, Tim Finlay, invited him -along with Paige, Emily and Spencer, of course- to Nora's baby shower.

Tim and Nora's house wasn't big, but the garden was large enough to accommodate the twenty or so guests who were there on a beautiful, sunny Saturday.

For the previous hour or so, Nick had been wandering around the garden and the patio. He had exchanged a few casual words with the other guests, of course, especially with Mr. Chamoun, Nora's father, who had come from Reno with his wife. But Nick had spent most of the time by himself, lost in his own thoughts.

His mind seemed to be elsewhere - except when, like now, his eyes landed on Paige. His daughter, with Emily by her side, was positively glowing. And Nick, not to mention everyone else, couldn't fail to notice.

"I wished her mother could have seen her like that," Nick blurted out, much to his own surprise -and to Nora's. He wasn't usually the one to voice his thoughts, let alone his feelings.

Nick cleared his throat and glanced at Nora, who simply nodded in understanding, a soft smile on her lips.

They remained silent for a moment, their eyes on a beaming Paige, who was holding hands with Emily, the two girls apparently giggling at a silly joke from Spencer.

"...Thank you for taking care of my daughter when I was away," Nick said in his low, deep voice. "Thank you for being here for her. You and Tim, I mean."

"Anytime, Nick," Nora said softly, before reaching for Nick's arm and squeezing it briefly. "Paige is like a sister to Tim, and to me too, of course. And she's gonna be a busy aunt soon," she teased, pointing at her round belly. "I've already booked her and Emily for babysitting duty."

Nick raised a brow. "Really?" he asked. "Because, um, that's nice, but Paige is going to have a really busy semester, being back at Stanford, with her classes, her swimming and... everything. I'm not sure that her schedule..."

"Relax, Nick," Nora cut him off with a smirk. "I was just kidding."

"Oh," Nick said, confused. "Sorry. Anyway, Paige can do whatever she wants. As long as she's happy."

"You're a good father," Nora observed.

Nick shrugged. "Well, I don't know. All I know is that I used to be too hard on her. I realized that after... well, after what happened to our family last year. I just hope it's not too late."

"It's not," Nora assured the older man. "You're here for each other now. That's all that counts."

* * *

"Em, go easy on that Lebanon rosé," Spencer smirked. "How many glasses have you had exactly?"

Emily giggled. "Not so many," she said happily. "Anyway, I'm not driving today, Spencer. And this rosé is so good with those... things..." she stuttered, gesturing to the table next to her, where a large spread of food was displayed for the guests.

"It's called _mezze,_ " Spencer explained. "It's a typical Lebanese dish. Well, dishes, to be exact. You can have Hummus, Tabbuleh salad, koftas, grilled eggplant..." she enumerated.

"It's sooo delicious," Emily said, her tone so enthusiastic that Spencer and Paige couldn't help but exchange an amused look. "Paige, baby, we absolutely have to go to Lebanese... Libania..."

"Lebanon," Spencer corrected with a roll of her eyes. "For your information, Em, you can find Lebanese restaurants all over the world. I'm sure there are several good ones in the Bay Area... Just ask Nora's parents."

Nora's father, though born and raised in California, was of Lebanese descent. He and his wife had brought a bunch of dishes, including the excellent 'mezze', and some very good desserts. And, of course, the wine that Emily seemed to enjoy so much.

"It's quite yummy," Paige approved. "But I definitely prefer a good hamburger," she said, before biting into the huge burger Tim had just made for her.

Emily rolled her eyes exaggeratedly. "You're hopeless, babe," she slurred. "But I love you regardless." She leaned over and gave Paige a quick peck on the cheek, and then on the lips.

"Thanks, Em," Paige gulped, a slight blush on her face. "By the way, I think that Spence's right, Em. Maybe you should slow down on the wine? Just a bit?"

Emily pouted but put her glass down on the nearest table.

"Smitten," Spencer whispered to Paige, who shot her a sly wink.

Two hours later, the party was slowly coming to an end. Emily had sobered enough to engage in small talk with a few other guests, including Nora's mother, and even Nick McCullers himself.

Paige's father seemed to be really interested in Emily's college life and her plans for the future. He also questioned Emily about the upcoming summer. Emily had long planned to spend a week and a half with her mother in Rosewood before flying to the Philippines, where Pam's mother still lived. They were planning to stay there for over a month.

The last part of Emily's summer vacation was supposed to be spent with both of her parents, in Texas, where Wayne was still deployed. Of course, Emily has scheduled all of this before she and Paige got back together. It was difficult for both girls to accept being separated after only a short whole back together - even though it would only be for a couple of months.

Emily had bargained with her mother to delay her arrival in Rosewood by a few days. Pam Fields had been a little disappointed at first but had finally agreed to let Emily exchange her plane ticket for a later one - despite the extra cost.

Another one who was a little disappointed was Hanna. The blonde girl was already back in Rosewood, her school year having finished earlier than her friends'. She had been thrilled in advance about spending some free time with Emily, as they used to in high school. Emily had apologized to Hanna by phone, assuring her friend that she would make it up to her once in Rosewood. As elated as she was to be in love again, Emily was determined not to let down her best friends.

Before leaving Tim and Nora's house, Nick McCullers also had a word with his daughter. He hadn't seen much of her over the past days, and though he understood that Paige wanted to spend as much time as she could with her girlfriend before Emily's departure, there was something he wanted to ask her in person. He got his opportunity when the two of them were talking alone, as they helped Tim clean up from the party.

"Um, Paige," Nick began hesitantly. "I know that you and Emily have plans for the upcoming week, but do you think you could save your Wednesday for me?"

Paige, surprised, studied her father's face. There wasn't any irony or resentment in his tone, or in his expression. Still, he looked rather uncomfortable.

"...Sure, dad," the auburn girl said. "Is it for a special occasion, or..."

As soon as the words left her mouth, Paige remembered. She closed her eyes and bit her bottom lip, guilt washing all over her. "Oh crap," she stammered. "Sorry, dad. I'm so lame."

The following Wednesday was Jennifer McCullers' birthday. And, of course, it would be the first without her.

Nick put a soothing hand on his daughter's shoulder. "That's okay, Paige. I know that you miss your mother as much as I do."

Paige nodded, her throat tight. She couldn't believe that she had almost forgotten her mother's birthday. _Being in love is not an excuse for being selfish..._

"I was thinking," Nick resumed, his voice still a little tentative, "that we could go to the Lake house? Have some lunch, maybe spend the afternoon there?... And on the way back, bring some flowers from the garden to your mother's grave? And to Ryan's, of course."

Paige let out a strangled sob, and took a step forward before hugging her father, much to Nick's surprise.

"I'd love that, dad," she croaked, her face buried in her father's chest. "I'd really love that."

* * *

 _ **San Francisco - Blue Bird Café - Sunday**_

Rebecca moved towards Emily and whispered in her colleague's ear: "Emily, are you sure your friend really is, um, a fit for the job? Because, from what I've seen so far..."

Emily glanced at a very nervous Spencer, who was doing her best, but was visibly trying to hide her increasing frustration at a couple of customers who had already changed their lunch orders twice.

The raven-haired girl had managed to convince Luis and Heidi, the Blue Bird Café's owners, to give Spencer a try as Emily's replacement during the summer.

Spencer was in desperate need for a job, and though she had no waitressing experience, Emily was pretty confident in her best friend's ability to master the job quickly. Spencer was smart and witty, and could be very charming when she wanted.

The problem was that she was so eager to do well that she was putting unnecessary pressure on herself. She had already broken two glasses and a plate, and though Heidi had assured her that it was nothing, Spencer felt as if she were on probation.

"She'll do fine," Emily assured Rebecca. "Spencer is brilliant. You'll see."

"Well, she definitely sounds like a brainiac," the blonde waitress pointed out. "She seems to have instantly memorized all the dishes on the menu, and her customers' orders. But does she have, um, the required customer skills? Especially when people are really.. annoying, or rude. You know how often that happens in our job, Em."

Emily bit her bottom lip. "Yeah, well... I'm sure Spencer will manage that well, too," she said in a cheerful tone. Spencer glanced at her from the middle of the room, looking like a lost puppy, and Emily gave her a thumbs up. ' _You're doing great,_ ' she mouthed, her white lie earning a relieved smile from the slender brunette.

Just then, Emily's cell phone buzzed, and the Berkeley student quickly grabbed it from her apron pocket. She broke into a wide, goofy grin at the sight of the text she had just received.

Rebecca rolled her eyes. "That's your girlfriend again?" she asked. "Just a reminder, Em, we're not supposed to use our phones during service."

"I know," Emily acknowledged. "It's just that... well, Paige texted that she misses me."

"Already? But aren't you two spending all your time together lately?" Rebecca teased. Emily just shrugged, and immediately started to type her answer to Paige.

Rebecca snorted. "Well, as long as you're not _sexting._.. I guess it's okay!"

Emily's sudden blush and half smile, was her only answer.

* * *

 _ **Berkeley - Thursday**_

It was a glorious early summer day in the Bay Area. Emily and Paige were lying lazily on the grass of Sophomore Lawn, one of Berkeley's nicest outdoor napping place. All around them, couples or groups of friends were doing the same. Finals were over, and even though the students didn't know their results yet, everyone was feeling free and full of optimism as summer vacation were just around the corner.

For Paige and Emily, though, the feeling was bittersweet. The days had flown by since they got back together, and even though Emily had managed to delay her departure, it was now time for her to fly back to the East Coast. She was excited at the prospect of spending some time with Hannah in Rosewood, of course, and she was looking forward to the trip to the Philippines with her mother after that, but leaving Paige was a real heartbreak.

They had avoided the topic as much as they could, but denial wasn't an option anymore, with Emily leaving the next day.

After Paige sighed for the tenth time in five minutes, Emily propped herself on her elbow and stared at her girlfriend, her brows slightly furrowed.

"What?" a clueless Paige asked.

"Paige," Emily said in a serious tone. "You knew it was going to happen, right? Me leaving for the summer?"

"Of course, Em," Paige said. "I know that. It doesn't make things easier, though."

"Right," Emily admitted. She reached out to stroke Paige's cheek tenderly, and the auburn girl let out another sigh - which sounded more like a small moan- at the touch.

"I get that you have to leave, Em, but... why the whole summer? And this trip to the Philippines... I'm a little worried. The Philippines has typhoons, super typhoons even, right?"

Emily rolled her eyes fondly. "Well, if you put it like that, California has earthquakes. Should I be worried for you and Spencer, then?"

"Um," Paige admitted. "Probably not. I mean, there's always a slight possibility, but..."

"Exactly," Emily said.

Paige nodded, and a silence fell over the two girls. But Emily knew that Paige had something else in the back of her mind.

"...What are you _really_ afraid of, Paige?" Emily asked in a soft voice.

"Afraid? I'm not afraid," Paige countered. "I'm just... sad, Em. I'm not afraid."

"What are you afraid of?" Emily repeated, her voice firmer. "Say it."

Paige sat back and studied her girlfriend's face. Emily's big brown eyes were, if possible, more intense than ever.

"I'm afraid..." Paige began, her voice low and a little hesitant. "I'm afraid of... the long-distance thing. I mean, I screwed up once, and... what if I..." she dipped her head and closed her eyes.

"Paige, look at me," Emily said. "Are you going to... screw up things again?"

Paige opened her eyes and shook her head vigorously. "Of course not, Em," she pleaded. "Of course not. I would never do that again."

"So, are you doubting _my_ loyalty, then?" Emily asked, her voice still soft and calm.

Paige shook her head again. "No," she said. "No, Emily. I trust you with my life. You know that."

"Good," Emily stated. "You should trust yourself, too. And, more important, have faith in us, Paige. We've come a long way, haven't we? A summer apart isn't going to change that."

Paige nodded, a relieved smile on her lips. She leaned forward to capture Emily's lips in a tender kiss. Emily grinned against Paige's mouth and parted her lips, allowing the auburn girl to deepen the kiss. Paige eagerly obliged, but not before shooting a quick glance at the other students around them. But nobody was staring, or seemed to care, for that matter. Being in UC Berkeley had its perks.

* * *

 _ **San Francisco airport**_ _ **\- Friday**_

Paige was staring blankly ahead of her, her hands tightened on the wheel. Next to her, in the passenger's seat, Spencer was patiently waiting. They had just dropped Emily off for her flight, and the goodbyes between Em and Paige had been teary, as expected.

After a few minutes of silence, the slim brunette finally decided to speak.

"Paige," she ventured, "Do you want me to drive?"

"I'm just sad, Spencer. I'm not drunk," Paige replied, her tone a little harsher than she expected.

"I know," Spencer said. "And you have every right to be. Sad, I mean. But you knew it was coming, right? Freshman year is over, and Emily can't stay here forever. She'll be back in a few weeks anyway."

Paige let out a deep sigh. "I know," she said. "I know she'll be back at the end of the summer. But I miss her already, you know?"

Spencer shot her friend a sympathetic smile. "Of course you do."

"...We had quite the perfect weekend in Lakeport, you know?" Paige sighed. "And the week after that... was more than great too. And that's an understatement."

"Yeah, about that," Spencer smirked. "I haven't seen you around much ,these past few days. You spent almost all your time in Berkeley."

"Well, Emily needed some help packing," Paige countered.

"Sure," Spencer said with a knowing smile. "Packing. I'm sure that's all you two did," she teased.

Paige blushed and gave her friend a playful shrug. "Well," she granted, "let's just say that we were more than happy that Em's annoying roommate had left the dorms early."

"Ah, young love," Spencer sighed with an exaggerated eye-roll. "I miss that."

Her tone was light, but Paige turned concerned eyes to her friend.

"Spence," she said. "I didn't mean to... I know you're single, and..."

"Believe me, Paige," Spencer cut her off, "I'm perfectly happy with being single for now. No more complications, no more drama. Not that drama is necessarily part of the picture," she quickly added. "But you know what I mean."

"Yeah," Paige said with a half smile. "Emily and I had our share of drama. As you already know."

"But everything's good now," Spencer pointed out.

"More than good," Paige said with a dreamy smile. "It's perfect. Well, maybe not perfect, because Em and I aren't spending the summer together, but..."

"Exactly," Spencer said with a wink. "...Now, can we go, McCullers? I'd like to be in Oakland before nightfall, and do I have to remind you that we have some grocery shopping to do first?"

"Oh yeah," Paige smirked while starting the car. "My father is cooking dinner tonight, and you're waitressing. Can't wait to see that."

"Hey, I have to practice for my new job at the Blue Bird Café," Spencer protested. My first shift is on Sunday, remember!"

"Speaking of that," Paige said. "Do you want me to be there? As a customer, I mean. I could be your moral support. And I could tip you big. But only if the service is top-notch, of course," she teased.

"Thanks, Paige," Spencer retorted, "But I think that it would only make me more nervous. Maybe later... when I'm better at it," she added with a sheepish wince.

"Okay, Spence. I totally understand. And by the way, as I told you before, you can take the car. It will be more convenient for you, and I won't need it this weekend anyway."

Spencer shot her friend a thankful smile. All the new things in her life -the Californian way of life, the new job, the upcoming new university... all of them were thrilling, of course, but also a little scary sometimes. But she was more than grateful to have found a new home -a new family even- with the McCullerses.


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: Hello guys! Happy May Day, if you're lucky enough to have a holiday (I am!), and happy Monday everyone!**

 **Thank you for the very kind reviews to chapter 19! I'm so glad you're still reading, and enjoying the story. So, this chapter is a rather short one, but I had so much fun writing it.**

 **By the way, the first scene is my own little revenge for 7X11 (if you're still watching the show, you know what I mean). Enjoy! ;)**

 **As always, thank you so much** _ **siophiefandom**_ **for the betareading and the constant support. It really means a lot.**

* * *

 _ **Rosewood - mid June**_

Emily and Hanna were getting their nails done at their favorite beauty salon in Rosewood, chatting animatedly about their school year and their plans for the summer. To be precise, it was Hanna who was doing most of the talking, as usual. Emily didn't mind. She had missed Hanna's babbling, and it was definitely fun to hear all the latest stories about their former high school classmates and even their teachers.

Hanna didn't live in the area anymore, but, since she was studying in New York, she had the opportunity to come back to their hometown more often than Emily and Spencer did. Hanna's mother, Ashley Marin, was still living in Rosewood, and, like her daughter, she had a particular penchant for gossip.

So Emily sat listening to Hanna, a slight smile on her face, wondering how on earth her blonde friend could know -and why she would care- about so many people. Her own thoughts, of course, were more focused on one particular person, the auburn girl she had left behind in California.

Emily's attention returned to Hanna, though, at the mention of a name she hadn't heard in a long while.

"...So," Hanna was saying, "I saved the best for the last. I ran into Ali yesterday."

"Ali?" Emily asked, startled. "As in, Alison DiLaurentis?..."

"Yeah, that Ali, of course," Hanna retorted. She glanced at Emily, who looked frozen in her seat all of a sudden.

"Hey Em," Hanna asked, concerned. "Are you okay?"

Emily nodded. "Yes," she gulped. "It's just... I haven't thought about Ali in a while."

Hanna studied her friend's face. Emily definitely seemed uncomfortable, something that Hanna hadn't expected. Alison DiLaurentis, and all her shenanigans, belonged to their past. At least, that was what Hanna had thought.

"So..." Hanna said cautiously. "Do you want me to tell you, or not?"

"Tell me what?" Emily asked, her tone more defensive than she had intended. "Um, sorry, Han. It's just that... I don't care about her anymore. Not at all."

Hanna shook her head. "Of course not, Em. Neither do I. But... don't you want to know what I know?" she asked with a mischievous grin and a wiggle of her freshly done eyebrows.

Emily looked at her friend and sighed. "Okay, Hanna. You're gonna tell me anyway, right?"

"Absolutely," Hanna smirked. "But Em, the reason I wanted to tell you... is that it's big news, my friend. You won't believe it."

"Okay, shoot, Hanna," Emily said with an eye-roll.

"Well, first, Alison is married."

"What?" Emily exclaimed. "Married? To whom?"

"Oh, I didn't get the name, but he's a high school teacher who lives in Boston. He's a he, by the way," she specified, glancing at the raven-haired girl. Alison's sexual orientation had always been a sensitive topic, especially for Emily.

"Okay," Emily said, her tone even.

"And second, Alison is pregnant," Hanna said, jubilantly.

"What?" Emily exclaimed, so loudly that the other customers turned their eyes at her. "Alison is pregnant?" she asked, lowering her voice.

"Oh yeah," Hanna gloated. "Very pregnant. Huge, to be precise. She didn't say, but I'm pretty sure she's having twins. At least. She's enormous."

"Hanna," Emily chastised. "It's normal to be huge when you're pregnant."

"Yes, I guess," Hanna granted. "But, that fat? I'm not sure. And she looks terrible. She has these stains all over her face. And she looks ten years older than us. At least."

Emily shook her head at Hanna's comment, but couldn't completely hide the small smile across her lips. Emily Fields had never been one to enjoy the misfortune of others, but, somehow, it felt oddly comforting to learn that Ali was having it rough now. The arrogant blonde girl had manipulated her - and hurt her - so many times in the past. And she had hurt Paige, too, during the California girl's stay in Rosewood.

"...She didn't even ask about us," Hanna went on, "But I filled her in, of course. And you should have seen her face when I told her about you and Paige's perfect romance. She didn't voice it, but she was clearly jealous. I don't think her marriage is really a happy one."

Emily glared at her friend. "Hanna..."

"Oh come on, Em. That bitch got what she deserved. I don't know the whole story, but she probably decided to get married in haste to that boring high-school teacher once she got pregnant."

"How do you even know he's boring?" Emily asked with a roll of her eyes.

"Duh, Em, I'm just guessing," Hanna shrugged. "Who really wants to be a high-school teacher anyway?"

"And this rushed marriage thing," Emily said. "It doesn't sound like Ali at all. She was never one to be told what to do."

"Well, people change," Hanna retorted.

"True," Emily concluded, before focusing her attention on her freshly painted nails. "Okay, I think they're dry now. You were right, Hanna. This dark red polish looks really nice."

The digression wasn't just an attempt to change the topic of conversation. Emily had realized that she didn't care about Alison DiLaurentis anymore. Not at all.

* * *

 _ **Oakland - Late June**_

"Well, my friend, this is the good life," Shana stated before taking another sip of her cocktail. "You're really sure you don't want a Mojito, Paigey?..."

"Stop calling me that," Paige answered automatically. "And no, thank you, Shana. I'll stick to my non-alcoholic drink," she said, pointing out to her glass of orange juice.

Shana rolled her eyes dramatically. "Gee, McCullers. Let yourself loose for once. It's summertime! And we totally deserve it, after that beast of a training session."

"I know," Paige grinned. "It was intense. You sure improved your skills during your freshman year at NYU, Fring."

The two swimmers had spent the afternoon training in the Frings' pool. Shana was back in her hometown for a few weeks, and she had offered to let Paige share her training sessions with her. Shana and Paige had always had a healthy rivalry, and they always gave their all when they swam together - or against each other.

"You're not too bad yourself, McCullers," Shana admitted with a shrug. "Especially considering all the... _breaks_ you took during the year, lazybones!"

Paige glared at the tall, black girl. Shana, as usual, flashed her a broad smile and wiggled her eyebrows at her. They hadn't talked much about what had happened during the past year, but Shana, of course, knew the highlights. She also knew that her friend and Emily Fields were back together -a fact that she had relentlessly teased Paige about all through the afternoon.

Paige didn't really mind. She had responded to Shana's teasing, but just for the fun of it. She and Shana always had had that sort of dynamic - bantering with each other, even bickering sometimes, but always with a genuine fondness.

They were close friends, even though they didn't see each other very often anymore;, even though they could go for weeks without calling or texting each other. Realization dawned on Paige that, where Spencer had become like a sister to her, Shana was more like a first cousin. A favorite cousin that you only see once or twice a year, but with whom you're totally at ease. Because you're family.

 _That's probably why Shana and I didn't work out as girlfriends,_ Paige thought. _Wow, I don't even know why we tried to date each other. It seems so long ago anyway... and it was before I met Emily. God, Em. I so miss her. I can't stop thinking about her._

Paige's pensive look wasn't lost on Shana, who splashed some water from the pool on the auburn girl.

"Hey!" Paige protested before reciprocating the gesture. "Watch out, Fring! Or is that revenge because I just kicked your ass in the pool?"

"In a parallel universe, maybe," Shana scoffed. "Because in mine, _I_ kicked your skinny ass, McCullers."

The black girl set her Mojito on the pool's deck. "Now, wanna watch a video? My parents had the movie room in the basement totally redone, and the new sound system is dope, my friend."

Paige beamed at Shana. "Sure. But only if I get to choose the movie. I don't want to watch _'Fast and Furious_ ' again."

"Hey, I can't help it," Shana retorted. "Because, well, that's how I am in the pool, girl. Fast and furious," she winked, earning a snort and an eye roll from Paige.

* * *

 **Oakland, California (Paige) - Philippines (Emily) - Early July**

Emily woke up from her afternoon nap, startled, when she heard her phone go off. She grabbed the offending device from the nightstand and blinked at the screen, her face breaking into a huge grin at the caller's name.

"Paige?" she said in an excited voice. "It's really you, babe?"

"Of course it's me, Emily," Paige answered, the excitement in her voice matching Emily's.

"But shouldn't you be sleeping? What time is it in California?"

"Oh, it's not too late. Just after 1PM," Paige said. She had checked the time before calling Emily, as usual. The time difference between the Philippines and California was a real challenge, to say the least, but nothing that would stop the two girls from keeping in touch.

"What about you, Em? You sound a little sleepy? I thought it was afternoon in the Philippines."

"Oh, it is," Emily said. "I was just taking a short nap. You know, it's really hot during the day here. Though we had some rain today and yesterday, but the warm kind of rain, you know?"

"Not really," Paige said. "But that sounds... exotic. How are you doing, Em?"

"Oh, I'm doing great. It's so beautiful here, and my grandmother and my cousins and everyone... is so incredibly nice and welcoming. I miss you, though."

"I miss you too," Paige sighed. "I miss you every second, Emily. Especially at night, when I can't sleep."

At the other end of the line, Emily frowned. "You're having trouble sleeping again? What about your insomnia meds?"

"Oh, I stopped taking them," Paige explained in a detached voice. "As well as the anti-migraine meds."

"Paige," Emily said in a stern voice.

"No, really, Emily, it's fine. I haven't had a migraine in months now, and I've decided that it's better for me to get off of all those pills anyway. I've been taking them for too long. I'd be better off without them."

"Yeah, maybe, but Paige... you should consult a doctor first," Emily chastised.

"I will, I will, Emily. If you think it's absolutely necessary," Paige said. "But I didn't call you to talk about my insomnia, Em. And by the way, since I woke you up... that means you're in bed, right now?"

Emily rolled her eyes, even though Paige couldn't see her. "Yes, Paige. I'm in bed."

"In your room? Alone?"

"Well, I usually share this room with my mom, but she's not here right now. So yes, I'm alone. Why are you asking, Paige?"

"Well, I'm just trying to picture you," Paige said, her voice even huskier than ever. "What are you wearing? Or... are you naked? It would be understandable, since f it's so warm outside..."

"Paige!" Emily giggled. "I told you, I was just taking a nap! And it's the middle of the day here! Aren't you ashamed of yourself?"

"Not at all," Paige deadpanned. "I'm just asking my very hot girlfriend what she's wearing - or not- during a very warm July day in the Philippines, when she's in bed _and_ alone in her room. That's totally normal."

"Sure," Emily scoffed. "So, for your information, I'm not naked."

Paige let out an overly dramatic sigh. "Too bad. So... what are you wearing, then?"

"Oh, just that little lace night gown that you like so much," Emily said in a sing-song voice. "The one that's very short, and a little see-through."

At the other end of the line, Paige gulped. "Rea... really?"

"No, silly!" Emily giggled. "I'm wearing a t-shirt and a pair of beach shorts," she explained.

"Oh," Paige said, a little disappointed. "That's good too."

"What about you?" Emily asked.

"What?"

"What are _you_ wearing?...Hey, since you asked me, it's fair for me to ask," Emily said, the smile obvious in her voice.

"I guess so," Paige conceded. "So, Em, just so you know, I'm just wearing a long baseball t-shirt. You know, the one with the Berkeley mascot, Oski, on it?..."

"Hey, that's mine!" Emily exclaimed. "Paige, are you wearing my favorite Berkeley jersey?"

"Yep," Paige answered. "Let's just say that I stole it from you when I helped you pack last month."

Emily shook her head fondly. "You're such a weasel... you could have just asked, Paige. Seriously, you're..."

"...Amazingly bold? Incredibly adorable? Or totally creepy?" Paige cut her off.

"All of the above. Did you wash the shirt, at least?"

"Certainly not," Paige protested. "It still smells like you. I love that."

"Paige..." Emily chastised, though she felt delighted. "You're impossible."

Paige grinned, but before she could answer Emily, she heard a loud thud coming from the other side of the wall.

"Paige McCullers," Spencer's voice said through the thin wall that separated their rooms, "Do you realize that I can actually hear your weird phone-sex with your girlfriend?... It's really embarrassing," she added, "And you're not even doing it right, girl. Tell Emily I say hello, by the way."


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: Hi guys! Yes, I'm on a roll, so there's another update... earlier than expected, right? ;)**

 **Thank you so much** _ **siophiefandom**_ **for doing the betareading, once again! You rock!**

 **Trigger warning: this chapter approaches a sensitive subject (suicide attempt). If you don't feel comfortable reading about that, you should skip to the very end of this update. But don't worry too much though- you know how much I love our girls, so I will always take care of them in my fics. TeamPaily! forever!**

* * *

 **Stanford - Mid July**

Summer session had begun, and, not surprisingly, Spencer Hastings was already in her element. She had enrolled in four different classes, in fields as varied as marketing, comparative literature, political science, and even environmental science and technology - the only class she had in common with Paige. It was a busy schedule, but nothing a Hastings couldn't handle.

Paige had given her friend a grand tour of the Stanford campus, of course, and after a few days, Spencer had already found her favorite spots to study or simply to hang out with classmates. Stanford drew students from all over the country, and even some from abroad. It was a very stimulating environment, but the atmosphere remained relaxed - very Californian, according to Spencer.

"Is it like this during the school year?" Spencer asked Paige while they were having lunch on one of the many outdoor patios. "Do people always study outside? Why do they even have indoor libraries, then? I was at Cubberley this morning, and there was only one other student in there."

"Well," Paige said, "It's not too different during the school year. A lot of students like to study outside. But I suppose the libraries get some use, too, especially at night. Though I mostly used to study in my room, so I don't really know."

Spencer raised a brow. "You spent the whole year studying alone in your room?"

Paige shrugged. "Well, my roommate, Heather, was there, too, sometimes. When she wasn't out with friends, of course."

"You and your roommate weren't friends?" Spencer asked.

Paige sighed. "No, it's not even that. I mean... Heather and I... we got along. But... let's say that my social life was... nonexistent at the time," she said, dipping her head.

"And why was that?" Spencer asked softly, though she had a pretty good idea.

"It was... my decision," Paige said in a low voice, her eyes still focused on the ground. "After what had happened with Emily the summer before... I guess that I wasn't in the mood to mingle," she concluded with a shrug. "So, I basically withdrew into my shell."

"Hey," Spencer cut her off. "That's in the past, okay? This is a fresh start, for both of us."

Paige raised her eyes and shot her friend a small, but sincere smile. "You're right, Spence. And I'm so glad to have another shot at... the whole Stanford experience. With you here, to top it off."

"Yeah," Spencer grinned, her eyes sparkling with excitement. "It's gonna be a great summer. And a great school year after that, I'm sure. Oh, by the way, I think that I've chosen my major!"

"Already?" Paige asked. "Well, knowing you, I'm not so surprised, Spence. What are you thinking of?"

"Journalism," Spencer said in an excited voice. "My marketing professor here, Helen Lodge, also teaches print journalism and mass-media sociology during the year, and she's awesome. We've already had some very interesting discussions about media empowerment."

"I'm sure of that," Paige grinned. "And journalism, that's a great idea. I can totally picture you as a journalist. Spencer Hastings, the great investigator!" she teased. "Like that old movie, you know, the one with Robert Redford and Dustin Hoffman, about the Watergate scandal... I don't remember the title..."

"'All the President's Men'", Spencer said. "Great movie, by the way. You know your classics, McCullers. I'm impressed," she teased.

"Well, you're not the only nerd here, Hastings," Paige retorted with a playful roll of her eyes. "And by the way, I remember now, I watched that film at the drive-in theater in Lakeport."

"Oh, that same drive-in movie where you and Emily had a very hot make-out session," Spencer smirked.

"Em told you about that?" Paige gulped.

"Yep, she did," Spencer confirmed, a big grin on her face. "And I'm pretty sure she told Hanna, too."

"Oh god," Paige sighed dramatically. "I sometimes forget that you guys tell each other everything."

"Not everything," Spencer smirked. "And by the way, Hanna is still a little mad at me for not telling her about what happened at UPenn right away."

"Really?" Paige asked, surprised. "Wow, Hanna can be tough sometimes. I experienced that first hand," she pointed out, referring to the way Hanna had reacted after the cheating. "Though they're two totally different things," Paige quickly added. "I had no excuse for what I did to Em, and you... you were not the one to blame, Spence."

Spencer shook her head. "I don't think it's that simple, Paige. We've talked about that before, and I told you: I accept my full share of the blame for what happened to me."

Paige was about to object when she suddenly caught sight of a petite blonde girl who was rushing towards them, a huge smile on her face.

Paige jumped on her feet, just in time for the girl to fall into her arms.

"Paige! Paige McCullers!" the blonde stranger squealed. "I can't believe it's you! This is crazy!"

Spencer looked quizzically between the two girls. Paige seemed to be baffled, but also a bit embarrassed, if the slight blush on her cheeks was any indication. And the other girl seemed a little bit too exuberant to be just one of Paige's acquaintances - especially considering the auburn girl had just told Spencer that she had hardly any friends at Stanford.

Feeling Spencer's eyes narrowing on her, Paige let go of the petite blonde and cleared her throat. "Um, Natalie?" she said, taking a step back. "This is Spencer. Spencer, this is Natalie. The friend I traveled with for a while, in Europe."

"Oh yeah, so you're Spencer!" a beaming Natalie said. "I've heard so much about you! I feel as if I already know you!"

"Can't say the same," Spencer couldn't help but retort. She glanced at Paige, who looked like a deer caught in the headlights. "Paige did mention your name once or twice, though."

"Oh, okay..." Natalie said, the smile on her lips fading a little. Spencer narrowed her eyes at the smaller girl. She didn't want to be rude, but something about the newcomer was bugging her, and she didn't know what. The girl seemed objectively charming, not to mention very pretty, with her baby blue eyes and her freckles across her button nose.

"Um, Natalie,"Paige said in her husky voice, "It's great to see you, but, what are you doing here? In California, I mean?"

"Well, I'm seriously thinking of applying to an American college," Natalie explained. "And you spoke so highly of Stanford..."

"Yeah, but why.. why didn't you call me first?" Paige stammered. "We could... have planned something... I mean, I had no idea that you even were in the States."

Natalie pursed her lips and looked down. "Well," she said in an hesitant voice. "I didn't know you were here either, Paige. Last time we talked, you were seriously considering dropping out of college. You weren't even sure you were going to stay in California."

"Well, things have... changed," Paige said simply. "A lot."

Natalie raised her eyes to meet Paige's and asked in a soft voice: "For the better, I hope?"

"For the better," Paige confirmed with a small smile.

"Good," Natalie nodded.

The two girls stared at each other silently, until Spencer coughed and said: "Okay, so, how about a drink to... celebrate the happy reunion? This way I could learn more about you, Natalie," she added, taking the blonde girl by the arm, and ignoring Paige's pleading look.

* * *

 _ **Palo Alto - later that evening**_

Spencer took a last sip of her Bud Light and cleared her throat.

"So, Natalie, tell me," she began, her eyes fixed on the petite blonde in front of her. "You're Australian, right? So, how come you and Paige met in Europe, then?" she asked, in a prosecutorial tone very similar to that of Veronica Hastings, her lawyer of a mother.

"Oh, I'm half-Australian, half-French," Natalie explained. "My family was always on the move when I was younger, so my entire childhood was split between two continents. I try to take the best of both worlds, I guess" she said with a small wink.

"Uh huh," Spencer said without even the hint of a smile. "So, you and Paige first met in Paris, right? And then you traveled together for a while? How long? And where did you go?" she said, narrowing her eyes.

"Spencer," Paige intervened in a warning tone. "What is this, a cross-examination? What's your problem, exactly?"

Spencer turned her eyes to the auburn girl at her left. "What? I don't have a problem at all. I'm just trying to get to know your friend a little better," she said in a defensive tone. "And since you're barely talking tonight, apparently, it's up to me to ask Natalie herself about your... time together in Europe. You're okay with that, Natalie, right?"

The perky blonde, looking more and more uncomfortable, just nodded.

"If you have any questions about us, Spencer, go ahead! Spill it!" Paige said, her voice rising. "And ask me, instead of putting Natalie on the spot!"

"I... I'm fine, Paige, really," Natalie stuttered, fidgeting in her seat. "Um, does anyone want another drink?"

"No," Spencer and Paige both snapped at the same time. The tension between them was becoming so obvious that some customers had started staring at the three girls.

"O-kay," Natalie said after a beat. "I... I have to go to the bathroom, so..."

She got up and quickly headed for the bathroom, leaving a frustrated Spencer and an angry Paige behind.

"What the hell, Spencer?" Paige hissed. "Seriously, what's wrong with you tonight?"

"You tell me, Paige," Spencer said in a defiant tone. "You're acting super weird yourself. I mean, you should be delighted to see your friend, and you're clearly not. And it's as if you're... hiding something."

Paige looked away. "It's not what you're thinking," she muttered.

"Oh yeah? And how do you know what I'm thinking?" Spencer challenged.

Paige didn't answer but shook her head instead, her eyes still down. "...Whatever," she mumbled. "You can think what you want, I don't care," she added in a harsh tone. "I'm always the bad guy in your and your friends' scenario, anyway."

Spencer stared at Paige, her mouth half open, before letting out a exasperated sigh and getting up briskly. She grabbed her jacket and threw a five-dollar bill on the table.

"I'd better go, or I'm gonna say something I'll regret," she said. "Enjoy your night with your friend."

When Natalie came back from the bathroom a few minutes later, she found Paige alone at their table, her head buried in her hands. The petite blonde swiftly sat back down in her chair and reached for Paige's arm, patting it softly.

"I'm sorry, Paige," she said. "I didn't mean to cause any trouble between you and Spencer."

"You didn't," Paige muttered, her voice a little shaky. "It's not your fault."

"You didn't tell her, did you?" Natalie asked. "Spencer doesn't know?"

Paige shook her head. "No. Nobody knows, besides you and me. And it has to stay that way."

"Is that why you're acting weird?" Natalie ventured. "Are you afraid that I'd tell your friends?... Because I'd never do that, Paige. You know that. I made you a promise."

Paige sniffed and reached for Natalie's hand, squeezing it tightly.

"I know. I trust you. And I'm sorry for... for acting like a jerk. I guess I wasn't prepared to see you again."

Natalie shot Paige a brief but reassuring smile. "Yeah, I guess so. I wasn't, either. It's weird, though, Paige. It's as if we can't talk anymore now, and we used to be so close... especially after... you know..."

"Yeah," Paige said in a low voice. "What we shared in Europe, it was..."

"...Intense?" Natalie finished the sentence. "You could say that. I will never forget that night in Berlin."

Paige let out a small laugh. "When you say it like that, it sounds as if we had... an affair. I'm pretty sure that's what Spencer thought, by the way."

"So what, would that have been so bad?" Natalie said with a playful roll of her eyes. "I'm a total catch. And you were single at the time, so what's wrong with that?"

"Nothing, I guess," Paige said with a half-smile. "Though we both now that it's not what happened... And, by the way, you're straight, Natalie."

The petite blonde shrugged. "Yeah, well, straight... that's a label.. and labels... they're overrated."

Paige stared at her friend, baffled. "You've switched teams?"

Natalie smirked. "Oh, you wish, McCullers. Sorry to disappoint you, but no. I still dig boys, and only boys."

"Your loss," Paige retorted with a wink.

The two girls exchanged a smile as they both relaxed in their chairs, the earlier tension now dissipating a bit.

* * *

 _ **Oakland - Later that night**_

When Paige parked her car in front of her house, she immediately spotted Spencer, despite the semi-darkness of the street. The slim brunette was sitting on the front porch, totally still, her arms wrapped around her knees. She was obviously waiting for her friend.

Paige slowly walked to the girl, a little guarded, and still feeling a pang of hurt after their fight at the bar a couple of hours earlier. The dim light from the porch couldn't hide how miserable Spencer looked. Paige's heart sank at the sight of the girl's pale face and her red, puffy eyes.

"Hey," Spencer said in a hoarse voice.

"Hey," Paige answered simply, before sitting next to Spencer. "You're okay?" she asked, even though she already knew the answer.

"...Not really," Spencer admitted. "You?"

Paige shrugged. "Same," she said. "How... how did you get back home?"

"I called an Uber," Spencer said with a shrug. "No biggie."

"I... I really feel bad, Spencer. We've never fought before, and... I'm sorry for snapping at you at the bar."

Spencer shook her head vigorously. "No, Paige, I'm the only one to blame. I was way out of line, questioning your friend like that."

"Yeah, well...about that... what was going on?" Paige asked. "Do you blame me for... for something? Do you think that I hid things from you? About what happened while I was in Europe?"

"I don't know, Paige," Spencer said honestly. "I... I don't know why I reacted like that. But you know, I had this sudden feeling that... something had happened, between... you and that girl. Not that I'm implying that... " she quickly added. "And by the way, you had every right to... have a holiday fling, or whatever it was. You and Emily weren't even together anymore at the time."

"Absolutely," Paige said. "So, why were you so upset, Spence?"

Spencer sighed deeply. "I guess that... I felt a little disappointed. Betrayed, even," she confessed, stealing a glance at the girl at her side.

"Betrayed?" Paige asked, puzzled. "But, Spence..."

"Don't get me wrong," Spencer cut her off. "You're entitled to have other friends. Of course you are. But it's obvious that you and that Natalie girl shared something... something important."

"...Yeah," Paige said after a brief silence. "Yes, there's something between us. But it's not what you think, Spence. We didn't have an affair, or a fling. Natalie and I are just friends."

"But there's something there, though," Spencer stated.

Paige just nodded. The two girls stared at the quiet street in front of them for a minute.

"...You don't have to tell me, you know," Spencer resumed in a hoarse voice. "If it's your secret... yours and Natalie's... well, I can live with that."

"I..." Paige started, before letting out a puff of air. "I really wanted to tell you, you know, Spencer. I've tried. So many times. But I guess that I'm... I'm still afraid. You won't look at me the same way once... once you know," she said, dipping her head.

"Wow, it's that bad?" Spencer frowned. "What did you two do, break the law? Did you kill someone, or what?" she joked, in an awkward and failed attempt to lighten the mood.

At Paige's reaction - she didn't answer, but visibly stiffened -Spencer felt a shiver run down her spine. "Paige?..." she asked in a blank voice, already afraid of the answer. "Please, tell me, because now I'm fearing the worst, and..."

"Spencer," Paige interrupted her friend, "Natalie, she... she saved me. She saved me from... killing myself," she said, her husky voice breaking a little at the last words.

Spencer felt a pang of pain deep in her chest. "Paige, no..." she stammered. "How... when..."

"We were in Germany," Paige said, her voice now barely audible. "I was... I was in a bad place at the time. I know, I've always told you and Emily and everyone that my trip in Europe was awesome, and yes, I had some good times, but the truth is... I had some dark days, too. Very dark days. Days where I was feeling... very depressed, and so alone, and worthless."

"Paige..." Spencer said again. "I'm so sorry... I had no idea..." She reached for Paige's hand and squeezed it, immediately noticing that it was shaking.

"...And that day, in Berlin," Paige went on, "I didn't know why it happened that particular night, but well, I had been wandering through the city for hours. I had a lot on my mind, and I ended up on this bridge, just above a busy highway, and... and I was really close to... jumping from it. But before I could do it... I heard someone scream my name. It was Natalie... she had followed me there, and she talked to me that night on that bridge, she... well, what we said that night is between us, but, somehow, Natalie convinced me not to do it. She managed to convince me that life was worth living."

"My god, Paige..." Spencer said, at a loss of words. "I'm... I'm sorry. I don't know what to say."

Paige wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. "Well, that's a first,then, Hastings," she said with a strangled laugh.

"Yeah, well... I'm so grateful that Natalie were there, and talked you out of it," Spencer said. "God bless that girl."

Paige just nodded, her throat tight. She squeezed Spencer's hand back.

"And have you... I mean, was that the only time you tried..." Spencer resumed in a careful voice.

"Yes," Paige quickly answered. "And I won't do that again, Spence. I swear. I told you, I was in a dark place then, and... so much have changed since. Including me."

Spencer wrapped her arm around Paige's shoulders. "Sorry for pressuring you to tell me. I totally understand why you wanted to forget that night," she said, tightening her grip around her friend.

"Well, honestly, I don't think I can really forget," Paige winced. "But, at the same time, I don't want to. I mean, that was a... rough step, to say the least, but it... it also made me who I am now. If that makes any sense," she said, sniffling.

Spencer nodded. "Oh yeah, that makes sense. I totally see what you mean. And I'm glad you told me."

"Yeah, I am, too, but..." Paige glanced at her friend, a look of gravity on her face. "Spencer, you have to promise me that you will never tell Emily. Or my dad. They must never know."

"Of course, Paige," Spencer assured the auburn girl. "Your secret -and Natalie's- is safe with me. I'd rather die than tell... shit. Sorry," she said with a sheepish smile.

"It's okay, Spence," Paige said. "I know what you mean. And I trust you." She laid her head on Spencer's shoulder and closed her eyes, the exhaustion and the relief getting the better of her.

* * *

The following morning, Nick McCullers entered his living-room,and did a double take at the sight of his daughter and Spencer, both sound asleep on the couch, a blanket laid over them. The TV was still on, the credits of a movie rolling off the screen. Spencer's head was resting on Paige's shoulder.

There was an almost empty bowl of ice cream on the coffee table, along with some soda cans - and an opened bottle of Nick's favorite whiskey. The older man huffed and reached for the remote, turning off the television. He grabbed the bottle and took a close look at it. Much to his relief, it was still rather full. If Paige and Spencer had sipped his whiskey (and he could see that they had), at least they hadn't overindulged. Still, the living room was a mess, Nick noted.

"Twenty-somethings," the man mumbled, shaking his head. "They're worse than teenagers. And you can't even ground them anymore."

"What?..." a sleepy voice asked, and Nick, startled, turned his eyes to his daughter. Paige yawned and rubbed her sleepy eyes. "Hi, dad. We fell asleep," she said needlessly, before stretching out her right arm, the one that wasn't wrapped around Spencer.

"I can see that," Nick McCullers simply stated. "Is there something you want to tell me, Paige? About you and Spencer?"

"What?" Paige gulped, now widely awake. "No, dad, it's not... I know we fell asleep on the couch next to each other, but we're not... Spencer is just... you know that I'm in love with Emily, and..." she stammered.

"Relax, Paige," her father smirked. "I'm just kidding. What, you didn't think your old man could do that?" he added at Paige's bemused face. "Well, that's where you're wrong."

Paige stared at her father, a small smile dawning on her face. "I can see that," she softly said, reflecting on her dad's words. "And I like it, dad."

* * *

 _ **A/N: Sorry for the angst, guys. I hope that you liked the chapter nevertheless. Don't forget to review, please!**_


	22. Chapter 22 - Summertime

**A/N: Dear beautiful readers! Since we're not gonna have a PLL episode this Tuesday, I thought you'd like a new chapter. I don't know if you guys are still watching the show (I am, until Paige's leaving...), but 7X14 left me with a bittersweet feeling. Of course, there was that beautiful Paily scene (that kiss!...), but we also know that Paige will leave next ep, so... seriously, why are they doing this to us?... :(**

 **Anyway, thank you so much for sticking with my story, even though last chapter was a bit angsty. It's always interesting to have your thoughts about what happens - it's great when you, readers, are involved in the story! I'm so grateful for every view, review and PM. Really, it means a lot.**

 **About that - some reviewers are wondering whether Paige will (or should) tell Emily about what happened in Berlin. I've thought about that a lot (while writing the chapter, and after posting it too). And the answer is that no, she won't tell Em - for now, at least (maybe much later... who knows?). Not because she doesn't trust Emily enough, of course not, or because she wants to hide things from her. As some reviewers pointed out very accurately, Emily clearly told her girlfriend (in a previous chapter) that she wanted to share everything with her from now on - the good and the bad. And Paige agreed. That's still true. But Paige won't tell Emily about the suicide attempt because she wants to protect the girl she loves (that's Paige we're talking about - you all know her!) and she knows that Emily would be devastated if she learned about it.**

 **That said, I'm glad to announce that this update is drama-free. And I really hope that you will enjoy it! For now on, it will be all Paily fluffiness, I promise. (By the way, this story is approaching its ending. Probably 2 or 3 chapters more, I think).**

 **A/N 2: As always, big shout out to my awesome betareader,** _ **siophiefandom**_ **! Thank you so much! ;)**

* * *

 **Fort Hood, Texas. August.**

After three full weeks in Texas, where Wayne Fields was deployed, Emily was beginning to go around in circles. She had been delighted, of course, to spend some quality time with her parents, at first ,"as in the old days", as Wayne himself liked to say.

The housing and the amenities for military families were more than fine, but there wasn't much to do in Fort Hood, especially not for a twenty-year-old girl like Emily, who had come to love the independence of the life she had experienced in California during her freshman year.

On top of that, the relations between Emily and her mother had become a little tense, to say the least. Maybe it was because they had been stuck together since the beginning of the summer -first in the Philippines, and then in Texas. Emily and Pam were growing more and more edgy with each another, a fact that hadn't been lost on Wayne.

He knew better, though, than to confront his "favorite girls", as he loved to call them. So he tried his best to lighten the mood with some of his silly jokes and a few suggestions - for instance, encouraging Emily to sign up for one of the many one-day excursions that were offered by the camp, or asking his wife out to the movies.

There was another reason that Emily was feeling a little grumpy and moody. She missed her girlfriend. The daily texting and the bi-weekly phone calls or Skype sessions were a poor substitute for the real thing. Of course, it was easier for Paige and Emily to keep in touch once Emily was in Texas - with only a two-hour time difference, and none of the network problems that they'd had to deal with a few times when Emily was at her grandmother's house in the Philippines.

That evening, Emily was coming back from a late work-out session (Ford Hood had several on-site gyms, and also a nice aquatic center) when her phone went off, with the ring tone she had assigned to Paige. They had called each other earlier that day, so Emily was surprised -in a good way- by the unexpected call from her girlfriend.

Her joy immediately turned into concern, though, when Paige informed her that she was calling from a hospital.

"A hospital? What happened? Are you sick? Or is it Spencer? Or your dad?" Emily exclaimed.

"No, no, Emily," Paige answered quickly. "I'm perfectly fine, and so are Spencer and my dad. Sorry, Emily, I didn't mean to worry you."

"Oh god," Emily sighed, relieved. "You scared me, babe. But Paige, what are you doing in a hospital, then?"

"Well, Em, it's... wait, you'd better sit down before I tell you."

"Paige!" Emily protested. "You're scaring me again!"

"It's all good, it's all good, Em, I promise," Paige quickly reassured her girlfriend. "It's been a long and crazy day, but we're so happy. I couldn't wait to tell you."

"We?" Emily asked. "Who is we, exactly?"

"Everyone," Paige answered in an excited tone. "Tim, Spencer, my dad, the Chamouns... Em, Nora just had her babies!"

"What? Already? But wasn't she due in September?" Emily exclaimed.

"Yes, she was," Paige said. "But I guess the babies were in a hurry to get out."

"Oh god, you're right, I have to sit down," Emily stammered, before taking a seat on the nearest bench. "How are the babies doing? And Nora?"

"Well, Nora is doing fine, though she is extremely tired, of course," Paige explained. "I haven't seen her yet, but Tim is with her right now. And the babies... they're okay too. We were really worried at first, because the baby boy is very tiny, moreso than his sister, but the doctors told us that he's in good health. They put him in an incubator, but more as a precaution."

"Oh god," Emily said again. "And the baby girl?"

"Oh, Emily, she's so perfect!" Paige exclaimed. "I wish you could see her! She's tiny too, but she's strong already, and she's already this ray of sunshine, you know?"

On the other end of the line, Emily smiled fondly. "Can you send me some pictures of them?"

"I will, Emily, I will, as soon as they let me see them again. I can't wait," Paige said excitedly.

"Neither can I," Emily said. "I can't believe I missed it!"

They talked a bit more, until Paige had to hung up when a nurse came to lead her to the nursery. Twenty minutes later, Emily's phone buzzed again and she flipped it open to discover two photos. The first one showed a beaming Tim, holding a small but beautiful baby with a yellow bonnet on her head.

' _This is Olivia,'_ Paige had written under the picture. ' _She's already a daddy's girl, it seems.'_

The second photo showed a tinier but equally beautiful baby boy, in what was clearly an incubator crib. ' _This is Liam,_ ' Paige had added. ' _The doctors say he's a fighter. I'm sure he can't wait to meet his family, including you.'_

That night, Emily went to bed with a big smile on her face and a warm feeling in her chest. She and her parents had spent a nice, relaxed dinner together, without Emily and Pam bickering with each other - for the first time in days.

And Pam Fields had been more than surprised - but happy to oblige- when, after dinner, Emily told her that she wanted to take a look at some of her baby pictures with them.

* * *

 _ **Lincoln, Nebraska. August.**_

In Mid-August, Paige and Nick McCullers flew to Lincoln, Nebraska, for a three-day weekend. Nick's mother, Harriet, was celebrating her 80th birthday, and she wanted her whole family to be there for this special occasion.

Paige and Nick had been surprised, at first ,when they had received the invitation- which was more of a firm request- from Harriet, a strong woman who had always refused to take no for an answer. The McCullerses loved each other, of course, but they were very reserved people, and they were not really fond of big family reunions.

Against all odds, though, Paige and her father really enjoyed their extended weekend in Nebraska. Nick spent a lot of time playing football in the backyard with his two young nephews, his sister's sons, who happened to be Cornhuskers fans, like him.

And Paige, who had been rather nervous at first (she knew that a few members of the McCullers clan, especially Keith, Nick's older brother, still weren't comfortable with the fact that she was gay), finally managed to relax enough to spend some quality time with her cousins and her grandmother.

Harriet McCullers had always had a soft spot for Paige. Of course, officially, Harriet claimed to love all her grandkids the same, but it was no secret that she shared a special bond with Nick's daughter. So nobody was really surprised when, that Saturday night, the old woman asked Paige, and Paige only, to accompany her for an after-dinner stroll.

"You can all stay home and watch your stupid football or whatever on TV," Harriet told her children and grandchildren in her deep, raspy voice that still carried some Scottish inflections (Harriet was born in Glasgow, and although she had lived in the United States for more than sixty years, she had never completely lost her accent).

"Paige and I need some time away from you boring people, so we're going out for a walk," Harriet had stated, before dragging a half-smiling, half-embarrassed Paige out of the house.

The two McCullers women walked in silence for a while, just enjoying each other's company and the quiet, starry Nebraska night, until Harriet pointed out a stone bench nearby.

"Mind if we take a break here, Paige?"

"No, of course, Grandma," Paige answered immediately. "Are you tired?"

Harriet huffed. "Tired? After a five-minute walk? Are you serious? I might be eighty now, dear, but I'm still alive and kicking."

"Sure, grandma," Paige smiled, before helping her grandmother to sit on the bench. "You're a real badass."

"Mind your language, young lady," Harriet retorted in a stern voice - but her hazel eyes were shining with amusement. "...But you're right," she admitted after a beat. "I'm a tough one. And so are you, Paige. After all you've been through... you've become a strong, independent, beautiful young woman. I'm really proud of you."

She squeezed Paige's knee briefly, earning a small, but grateful smile from her granddaughter.

"Thank you, Grandma. That means a lot."

"I can tell that you're happy, now, Paige. Really happy with your life."

"That's true," Paige acknowledged. "My life is... almost perfect now. Well, not perfect, because I miss my mom so much, and Ryan too, but... you know what I mean," she said, dipping her head slightly.

"I know," Harriet confirmed. "And I'm glad that Nicholas followed my advice and went back to California to live with you."

"You.. you told Dad to do that? " Paige asked, bemused.

"I gave him my opinion, that's all," Harriet corrected with a half-smile. "And for once, he listened to me. I also heard that he had... a rather heated discussion over the phone with your mother's brother, Tim, on the same topic. It might have helped Nicholas to make the right decision."

Wow," Paige said, at a loss for words. "I didn't know that. You know, when Dad showed up in Oakland last Spring... I didn't really know what to expect. But I'm so glad he did."

"Well, my son might be stubborn, but he is not heartless or stupid," Harriet retorted. "And it's never too late to learn from your mistakes."

"I guess so," Paige said with a small grin. Both women knew that they weren't only speaking about Nick.

An easy silence fell over them, until Harriet cleared her voice and resumed talking.

"So, Paige. Tell me. That girlfriend of yours. It's really serious, right?"

"It is," Paige affirmed. "I'm in love with her, Grandma. Really in love."

"I can tell," the older woman said with a knowing smile. "The way your eyes light up when you talk about Emily... I can even tell when you're thinking about her. You get this goofy, but adorable, smile all over your face."

Paige stared at her grandmother, dumbfounded. Harriet McCullers wasn't exactly the romantic type, usually.

"...What?" Harriet asked bluntly. "I might wear bifocal now, but I'm not blind. And I'm happy for you, Paige. Really, really happy. You deserve the best of everything."

"Thanks, grandma," Paige said, her throat tight with emotion. She hadn't expected to have such a hear-to-heart discussion with her grandmother when they left the house.

"And I really hope I'll get to meet Emily soon," Harriet concluded. "All jokes aside, I'm an old woman now, Paige. So, don't wait too long to bring her here, okay?"

"I promise, Grandma," Paige said. She gently kissed her grandmother's cheek, earning a brief but happy snort from the older woman.

* * *

 _ **Fort Hood, Texas - Late August**_

"Are you sure she doesn't suspect anything?" Pam Fields asked her husband.

Wayne shot Pam a sly smile. "I'm pretty sure Emmy doesn't have a clue, Hon. Just make sure she doesn't take a look in the trunk of the car before we leave."

"Did you put all her belongings in there, like I told you?"

Wayne nodded, and was about to answer his wife when he heard a key turning in the front door of the small house he shared with his family in Fort Hood. "Here she comes," he whispered. "Ready, Pam?"

Pam Fields literally jumped from her chair and rushed into the entryway to greet her daughter.

"Emily!" she said in a cheerful voice. "We've been waiting for you! Don't take off your jacket, sweetie, we're going out for dinner."

"We are?" Emily asked, surprised. "But I thought that you said that all the restaurants in Fort Hood were overrated, not to mention overpriced?"

Pam smiled fondly. "No, honey. We're going to Austin tonight."

"Austin?" Emily said, surprised. "Oh, okay. But I don't want to be the third wheel, if you and Dad have a romantic dinner planned..."

"Don't be silly, sweetie," Pam cut her daughter off. "Of course you're coming with us. Don't forget your purse, and your keys. Oh, do you have your driver's license?"

"My license?" Emily asked, frowning. "Why do I need my license if we're having dinner in Austin? It's a one-hour trip, mom. Do you expect me to drive? Because dad's car is a stick, and I don't know if I..."

"I'll drive, Emmy, don't worry," Wayne's strong voice interrupted from the living room. "And your mother is right, by the way. It's always better to be prepared."

"Prepared?" Emily said. "Prepared for what?"

"You never know," her mother answered with a mischievous smile that left Emily even more perplexed.

One hour and a half later, Wayne Fields parked his black SUV in front of a four-star hotel in West Austin. Emily glanced at the building from the window of the car. She had expected to have dinner in a nice, casual restaurant downtown, but they had driven to the western part of the city, to a place that looked fancy, but also rather pricey.

"Is the restaurant inside?" she asked her parents. "Do you already know this place ?"

Pam and Wayne exchanged another knowing smile, and Emily rolled her eyes. She had peppered her parents with questions throughout the whole trip, only earning evasive answers.

She got even more perplexed when, once inside the hotel, Wayne and Pam headed for the reception desk instead of for the restaurant that could clearly be seen at the far end of the lobby.

"We've booked a room for the night," Wayne told the employee. "The name's Fields."

"We're spending the night here?" Emily whispered to her mother. "And why only one room? Are we all sleeping in the same room?"

At their daughter's words, Wayne and Pam couldn't help but burst out laughing, much to Emily's irritation, and to the hotel employee's surprise.

"...Okay, Pam," Wayne said when he stopped laughing. "I think we'd better tell her now."

"Tell me what?" Emily frowned. "Are we having dinner, and are we staying at this hotel? This is getting ridiculous."

Pam Fields put a soothing hand on her daughter's arm. "Emmy, sweetie. We're going to have dinner together, of course. There's an excellent restaurant here, you'll see, and then your father and I are gonna spend the night in this hotel. Not you."

"But..." Emily stammered. "I don't get it..."

Wayne reached for his daughter's hand, and squeezed it gently. "Come with us, Emmy," he said in his deep, reassuring voice. "And then you'll understand."

Emily shook her head, but let her parents lead her inside the restaurant. She stopped dead in her tracks.

The room was full of guests and employees, but the only person whom Emily had eyes for was the stunning, beaming auburn girl who was waving at her from a table in a corner.

"Paige..." Emily said, her voice caught with emotion. "But how..."

She rushed to her girlfriend, engulfing her in a tight hug. She felt Paige's lips brush against her ear as she whispered: "Surprise, Em. Are you happy?"

"Oh god, yes," Emily squeaked. "I can't believe you're here! You're really here, right? This isn't a dream?"

"I'm really here," Paige smiled fondly. "And it might seem like a dream right now, but you're not dreaming, Emily."

She took a step back and stared at her girlfriend. "God, this summer's been really kind to you . You're more beautiful than ever, if that's possible, Em."

"You're not too bad yourself," Emily giggled. The two girls beamed at each other, their eyes locked, until they heard a small cough behind them.

"Okay, lovebirds, can we have dinner now? Pam and I are starving," Wayne Fields' teasing voice said.

* * *

"I still can't believe that you and my parents planned all this," Emily said. "And that you drove all the way out here. It's such a long trip from California to Texas, Paige!"

"Oh, I know, believe me," Paige said with a roll of her eyes. "It took me two full days and nights to get here, and I only made a few stops on the road."

"That could have been very dangerous," Emily chastised. "Did you get enough rest, at least? How are you feeling?"

"Perfectly well, especially now that you're with me," Paige said. "And you're the designated driver for the first part of the trip back, babe," she teased.

"Oh, don't expect me to drive more than three or four hours at a time," Emily said with a playful roll of her eyes. "I intend on making _a lot_ of stops."

"That's fine with me," Paige replied with a suggestive wink. "As long as we make good use of those stops, of course."

"Paige McCullers!" Emily giggled. "Take your mind out of the gutter! You weren't so bold when my parents were around tonight!"

"Well, I had to behave," Paige retorted, "if I wanted them to trust me enough to let me drive you back to Cali."

"I thought I was driving?" Emily smirked.

"Oh, you know what I mean, Em. And by the way, your father insisted on choosing the car, in case you're wondering. I was going more for a convertible Ford Thunderbird, you know, Thelma-and-Louise style, but he decided that this Chevy Impala was better suited for our trip," Paige explained with a small shrug. "So, I just said: 'Sir, yes Sir!'" she teased.

Emily rolled her eyes at her girlfriend's lame joke.

"Haha. Very funny. But Paige... you're not afraid of my father anymore, right?"

"Of course not, Em. Your father is a sweetheart. Just like his daughter."

"And you're a smooth talker, as always," Emily chuckled. She leaned over to drop a light kiss on Paige's cheek, earning a beaming smile from her girlfriend.

Paige, Emily and her parents had spent a very pleasant evening together, full of laughs, stories about their respective summers, and even Wayne Fields' anecdotes about his military life in Texas. And Paige and Emily hadn't let go of each other's hand during dinner - which had left them to eat with only their remaining free hands, much to Wayne's amusement. ("Is that why you chose the risotto, Emmy? Because you would only need your fork?")

* * *

After dinner, the Fields parents had said their goodbyes to the girls. Pam and Wayne were spending the night at the hotel - a nice change from their domestic life in Fort Hood, they told their daughter. Apparently, as Emily discovered to her surprise, her parents knew the place pretty well.

"The breakfast buffet is awesome here," Wayne had said with a wink. "Too bad you girls won't be here to enjoy it with us tomorrow morning."

The Fields, with Paige's consent of course, had reserved a motel room for the two girls, in a small inn near Interstate 10, the main road to the West.

"That way you'll be ready to hit the road first thing tomorrow," Wayne had explained. "It's just a basic motel, nothing fancy, but I guess you girls won't be getting much sleep anyway, right?"

"Wayne Michael Fields!" Pam had protested, her flushed cheeks matching Emily's and Paige's. "That's our daughter you're talking about!"


	23. Chapter 23 - You, me, donuts and diners

**A/N: This chapter is for you, my brave, resilient, beautiful fellow Paily shippers. I don** **'t know if the fluffiness of this update will help to soothe your Paily broken hearts or not, but I hope it will (a bit, at least).**

 **A/N: Awesome betareading from you,** _ **siophiefandom**_ **! ;) Thank you so much!**

* * *

 _ **Texas**_

Paige and Emily had decided to take the long way home to California. The two girls had more than a week ahead of them before the start of the college year, and they were determined to take full advantage of their remaining free time - not to mention their first long trip together.

After a night spent in a motel outside Austin (a night during which, as Wayne Fields had teasingly predicted, the two lovers hadn't gotten much sleep), they hit the road and headed West, toward El Paso.

They found a little hotel in Aqua Dulce. Emily had wanted to stop there because she thought the name of the place was exotic, but Aqua Dulce turned out to be rather disappointing. There wasn't much to do, or to see in the small, quiet Texas town.

The hotel had a pool, though, which was a big plus after a very hot day on the road (the temperature had reached 105°F, and even though the rental car had AC, of course, it was hard to bear).

Emily and Paige did swim a few laps, but just for the fun of it. They usually liked to challenge each other when they swam together, but it was relaxing to set aside their competitive nature for once. They mostly spent the late afternoon and the early evening paddling in the pool and in the small, but pleasant enough, jacuzzi.

The sun was setting, but Paige's fair skin had already turned reddish, especially on her shoulders and the back of her neck.

"That Irish-Scottish skin is gonna need some serious sunscreen, Babe," Emily observed, "That is, unless you're going for the boiled lobster look," she teased.

Paige rolled her eyes. "Very funny, Fields. I'm looking forward to you applying that sunscreen to my Irish-Scottish skin, by the way!"

"We'll see," Emily smirked. "Maybe, if you're lucky."

"Oh, but I'm counting on being lucky,"Paige deadpanned with a mischievous grin.

Emily rolled her eyes playfully and threw her bath towel at her girlfriend.

"Shut up, McCullers, and get your ass out of this jacuzzi!"

Evening found them in a diner, discussing their planned route over burgers, French fries and milkshakes. They agreed on bypassing the main roads and the most tourist-crowded areas -with a notable exception for the Grand Canyon, a place that Emily didn't want to miss for anything in the world.

Emily had done most of that day's driving, and she was truly exhausted, though she had been rather reluctant to admit it. The two girls quickly called it a night and reached their hotel room a little bit after nine.

Paige wasn't surprised when, coming out of the bathroom, she found the raven-haired girl fast asleep in front of the TV. Emily was still holding the remote in her hands, and she was snoring softly, her mouth slightly open.

Paige smiled fondly at the sight and tiptoed to the bed, gently taking the remote from Emily's hand and turning off the television. She put the light blanket over the sleeping girl, and leaned forward to press a light but tender kiss on her girlfriend's forehead. Paige then slipped into bed and cuddled against Emily, wrapping a protective arm around her.

* * *

 **Arizona**

Paige and Emily hadn't planned to make a stop in Phoenix, but an unexpected event made them change their plans. They were driving west, listening to KSLX, a classic rock radio station, when the deejay reminded the listeners that the band Lady Antebellum was performing in the capital city the following evening.

"Oh my god! Emily! We have to go see them!" Paige almost yelled, excited. "Can you imagine, Lady A. in concert!?"

Emily smiled fondly at Paige's enthusiasm. "Sure, baby, that would be awesome. But... do you think that we can still get tickets? The concert has probably been sold out for a while. And... I'm not sure that we could afford it anyway."

"Oh," Paige pouted. "I haven't thought of that. You're probably right, Em."

She looked so disappointed, all of a sudden, that Emily promised her girlfriend that they would, at least, give it a try.

Once they got to Phoenix, it turned out, unsurprisingly, that Emily had been right - the concert was already sold out. Paige hid her disappointment the best she could, assuring her girlfriend that it was fine: "we'll see them another time, Em. No biggie. And we can always listen to tonight's gig on the radio."

But Emily knew Paige well enough to see that she was crestfallen over missing the opportunity to attend her favorite band's concert. So, when Paige, who had done most of the driving that day, fell asleep in their motel room later in the afternoon, the raven-haired girl grabbed the keys of the Chevrolet and slipped out of the room. She had an idea in mind.

An hour and a half later, Emily was back at the motel. Paige was still sleeping peacefully on one of their twin beds (the cheap motel didn't have any rooms with a queen or king bed left).

Emily sat on the edge of the bed and gently stroked Paige's auburn hair.

"Hey," she said softly when Paige blinked and smiled at her.

"Hey," Paige said in a hoarse voice. "Did I fall asleep?..."

"Yep, I guess you did," Emily answered, before leaning in to press a kiss to her girlfriend's lips. "You were really tired, babe. Do you feel more rested?"

"Sure," Paige beamed. "I feel full of energy now," she said with a crooked smile, before reaching for the hem of Emily's tank top and pulling it slightly towards her, her intentions obvious.

But Emily leaned back, earning a small pout from Paige. "Well, that's good to know, but can you save that energy for later? I feel like going out tonight," Emily said in a giddy voice.

"Oh... okay?" Paige winced, a little bit disappointed, but always eager to please Emily.

"So, where do you want to go, Em? I spotted a small Tex-Mex restaurant across the street, are you in the mood for some enchiladas and some..."

"Paige," Emily cut her off, " I love Tex-Mex food as much as you do, but... just follow my lead tonight, okay? I promise you won't regret it," she added, her eyes already sparkling with eagerness.

"Oh, okay," Paige said again. "So, do you have a specific place in mind?"

"Yep," Emily grinned. "You could say that. A very special place."

"Oh, really? Great. And do, I, um, need to dress up?" Paige asked.

"Well," Emily said with a half-smile, "you're already wearing jeans, that's perfect for... where we're heading tonight. But I suggest that you put on that t-shirt of yours, you know, the one with the wild horses and the guitars on it?"

"Okay, but I thought you didn't like it? You said that t-shirt was 'too country'?..." Paige asked, perplexed.

"Well, I guess I changed my mind," Emily retorted. "I think that you look really hot in it. Oh, and did you pack some boots, by any chance?"

"Boots? No, I don't have any boots with me, Emily. It's summertime, and..." Paige began, before realization dawned on her.

"Emily, does this mean... is this what I think it is... did you manage to..." Paige asked in a hopeful voice.

Emily grinned at her girlfriend, before slowly taking an envelope out of her purse. She handed it to Paige, who looked like a kid on Christmas morning. The auburn girl feverishly opened the envelope and squealed at the sight of two tickets for the upcoming concert Lady Antebellum concert.

"Oh my god! Emily! How?"

"Well... let's say that I have my ways," Emily answered with a wink.

"But I thought the concert was sold out?"

"Oh, it was. Officially. On the regular market," Emily said.

"Em, does it mean... did you got those tickets off the black market?" Paige asked, bewildered. She was whispering, as if the concert police were listening outside the door.

Emily just nodded, with a half-sheepish, half-smug smile on her face.

"But Emily, that could have been dangerous!" Paige protested. "And it must have cost you a lot!"

Emily reached for Paige's hand and gently stroked it.

"Paige, everything's fine. The tickets weren't that expensive, I swear. And... I really wanted to do this for you. I know how much you love Lady Antebellum."

Paige shook her head. "You're unbelievable, you know," she said, her eyes full of adoration. "And I love you."

"I love you too," Emily grinned, before pulling Paige close and kissing her.

* * *

The Lady Antebellum concert was an absolute blast for Paige and Emily. Their seats were located rather far away from the stage, but that didn't prevent them from singing their favorite songs at the top of their lungs.

And when Charles Kelley, the lead singer, announced that the next hit was going to be ' _Dancing away with my heart_ ', the two girls yelled in excitement and fell into each other's arms.

That was their song, the one they loved the most, and the one they had danced to in Rosewood, just before Paige's return to California. It brought back so many memories.

And they danced to it, again, on that magic night in Phoenix. Their bodies close together, Emily's head buried in Paige's shoulder, and Paige's arms around Emily's waist.

They had the same blissful smile on their faces, and they looked so adorable together that a few people sitting near them even turned their eyes from the stage to watch the two girls instead.

Paige and Emily were still on a high after the concert. Paige, especially, felt wired, almost euphoric. She had insisted on buying Emily some Lady A goodies - a nice key chain, and also a white cowgirl hat.

When Emily protested that it wasn't necessary, Paige retorted that it was the least that she could do. "We're here thanks to you, Em. I still can't believe that you managed to find those last-minute tickets. Besides, you look very hot with that hat on," she pointed out.

"Oh, I see. So, cowgirls are a real turn-on for Paige McCullers," Emily smirked.

"Not at all," Paige protested, her cheeks slightly flushed.

"Uh-huh," Emily said with a knowing smile.

But later that night, in their motel room, Emily's assumption proved very accurate. They had hardly closed the door behind them when Paige pinned Emily against the wall, pressing her lips hard against Emily's, before kissing her way down the raven-haired girl's neck. Paige's eager hands were already fumbling with the buttons of Emily's cotton plaid shirt.

"Paige!" Emily giggled. "Slow down! We're not in a rush!"

"Oh yes, we are. I need you, now," Paige muttered, her mouth trailing kisses along Emily's now exposed collarbone.

"Oooh, I think I heard that song earlier," Emily teased, amused by Paige's reference to Lady Antebellum's famous hit, which the band had of course performed during the concert.

Paige just groaned in confirmation, now busy undoing Emily's bra. It wasn't an easy task, considering the raven-haired girl's shirt was nearly half-undone, and that Emily's back was pressed against the wall. But Paige finally succeeded, her small grunt of victory earning a laugh from Emily.

Emily's light giggles quickly turned into soft moans when Paige began to grind her hips against hers. Paige's hands were roaming over Emily's back and quickly went down to cup her jeans-clad butt.

"Paige..." Emily panted, both aroused and taken aback by her girlfriend's eagerness. "Can we..."

"What?" Paige groaned, her voice even huskier that usual. She nibbled Emily's left ear playfully, earning a soft gasp from her girlfriend.

"Bed... please..." Emily stuttered, now almost unable to form a coherent sentence.  
She felt Paige's lips smile against her skin.

Paige took a step backward, pulling Emily with her, to the nearest twin bed.

They literally fell onto the mattress, Emily now on top, her left hand sneaking under Paige's t-shirt, the other one fumbling with her belt buckle.

"Oh god," Paige moaned when she felt Emily cup her bra-clad breasts. "Emily, wait..."

"I thought you were in a hurry?" Emily teased, before leaning down to kiss Paige's jaw.

"Do you want me to stop?" she purred in the auburn girl's ear.

"No... yes..." Paige panted. "No, please don't stop, Em."

Emily smirked, and leaned back a little to get rid of her shirt in one swift movement. She was about to take off her cowgirl hat too, when Paige reached for Emily's arm, stopping her.

"Em, please...can you keep your hat on?..."

* * *

 _ **Arizona - Grand Canyon**_

It was Emily who had always wanted to see the Grand Canyon, but, surprisingly, Paige was the one who was most moved by the magnificent, almost unbelievable sight.  
Wonder and amazement were written all over Paige's face as she stared at the view spread out before them from their perch on the rim of the Canyon.

"Emily," she said in awe, "Emily, this is so... I can't even... it's almost... too much..."

"Too much?" Emily asked, amused but also a little worried. "Paige, are you okay?"

Paige quickly reached for Emily's hand and squeezed it.

"Yes, yes, I'm fine, sorry Em. It's just... you know?" she stuttered, frustrated at her inability to find the right words to express her feelings.

"I know," Emily grinned, relieved. "It's almost surreal, right?"

Paige nodded, her eyes still glued to the majestic view in front of them.

"Yeah. Though the great thing is that, it's real," she said in a hoarse voice. "I never thought I'd see something like this. And I'm so, so happy to share it with you, Em."

They sent Spencer a panoramic video of the stunning view, and their friend's immediate answer by text made them giggle in unison:

" _Glad to learn that some people are having a great time in incredible places, while I'm stuck at the Blue Bird Café with fussy customers. By the way, Em, your regulars want to know when you're coming back. Seem they can't wait. I wonder why. PS: Seriously, I'm really happy for you guys. Have fun, and take care of each other. But I know that you will (do both)."_

* * *

During their road trip, Paige and Emily discovered a few things about each other.

For instance, Paige was grumpy when she hadn't eaten enough (or hadn't had her morning coffee yet), while Emily was cranky when she lacked sleep.

So Emily made sure that she always had some fresh donuts and a thermos of coffee in the car for Paige, and Paige let Emily sleep in a bit in the mornings, before hitting the road.

They both loved to play music in the car while driving, but whereas Paige could listen to country music the whole day, Emily had more varied musical tastes. They bickered a little about that, before eventually agreeing that the designated driver of the day was also in charge of the music - or the soundtrack, as Paige liked to say.

They met some nice people along the way, too. Especially Todd and Vihaan, another gay couple. Their encounter happened at the most unlikely place, a souvenir store located in the Grand Canyon national park. Paige and Emily were there to buy some gifts for their families and friends, but most of the items in the shop were either too expensive for their budget, or too corny for their taste. They eventually managed to find something for Nick McCullers (a nice, silver whiskey flask), but they were running out of ideas for Emily's parents.

Emily and Paige were so focused on their task that they hadn't noticed the few glares and disapproving whispers coming from a small group of tourists - some senior citizens from Arkansas, according to their caps and t-shirts.

A few women, especially, were looking at them with scowls on their faces. Paige and Emily were simply holding hands, but, apparently, that was reason enough for those tourists to be pissed off.

When one of the women suddenly snapped at them, telling the two girls to "Behave in public, for God's sake," it was so unexpected that Paige and Emily simply stared at her, in shock, unable to react.

They had been on cloud nine since the beginning of their trip, and the woman's reaction had the effect of a slap in the face. A sad, and brutal, reminder that some people, even in their own country, still considered their relationship unhealthy or illegitimate.

That's when a tall, young man with light brown hair almost literally popped up between Paige and Emily and the group of tourists.

"If you bigots think that's shocking, well, then, look at us!" he said to the women, before reaching for the hand of a smaller, dark-skinned young man, pulling him closer, and then kissing him firmly on the mouth.

The older woman who had snapped at Paige and Emily gasped, turned back on her heels, and walked away. Her friends quickly followed her, a few of them still whispering and fussing about what just happened.

The two young men separated and the taller one, the one who had initiated the kiss, winked at Emily and Paige.

"Hello ladies," he said. "I'm Todd, and this is my boyfriend, Vihaan. Sorry for the PDA, by the way. We're usually less... effusive."

Paige shot Todd a thankful smile. She squeezed Emily's hand, relieved to earn back a firm squeeze from her girlfriend. Both girls had in mind, of course, a rather similar incident, that had happened during their first date, in Rosewood. Back then, Emily had been unsettled by another homophobic remark, and Paige had done her best to comfort her.

But things had changed, Emily and Paige realized. There were still intolerant people in this world, but they had grown strong enough to face them, together.

Emily, Paige and the boys hit it off so well that they ended up spending the rest of the afternoon together.

The evening found the four of them in a nearby restaurant, happily talking over some nachos and sipping a few non-alcoholic cocktails (they both had to hit the road after dinner).

It turned out that Todd, who was originally from Detroit, and Vihaan, who was from India, had just graduated from Portland State University.

"Senior year was hell, believe me," Todd (definitely the most outgoing of the two) told Emily and Paige. "Especially the last semester. Our only motto was 'work, work, work'. Oh, and sleep, sometimes. But not so often. So, enjoy your sophomore year while you still can, girls, I tell you."

"Todd is exaggerating, as usual," his boyfriend intervened. "Senior year wasn't hell. Unless, of course, you only start studying two months before finals... the way he did."

Todd nudged Vihaan in the ribs, and playfully rolled his big, blue eyes.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Vih. But whatever," he said, raising his Virgin Margarita glass. "It's still summertime, and we're young and in love. Not to mention very beautiful. Especially me,"he teased. "So, cheers! To us, and to our bright future!"

"Cheers," the three others chorused, their smiles matching. Emily reached for Paige's hand and kissed her knuckles. "The future is ours, babe. I love you so much," she whispered to her girlfriend.

Emily's big, brown eyes were shining with affection and pride, and Paige shot her a beaming smile in response, before leaning in to kiss her softly on the lips, earning an ' _awww'_ from Vihaan, and, of course, some more teasing from Todd.

The small group's easy banter was only interrupted by their waiter, who offered them some ice cream for dessert, on the house. It was definitely a great evening.

* * *

 _ **Nevada**_

Paige and Emily were in their small motel room in Mesquite, studying a map of Nevada, when Paige dropped the bomb.

"So Em," she started, her voice a little hesitant, "what if we make a stop in Las Vegas?"

Emily stared at her girlfriend, surprised. "Vegas? Really? But I thought that we wanted to avoid crowded places, and tourist traps?"

"Yeah, well..." Paige said, dipping her head slightly. "I just think we could have fun in Vegas."

Emily made a face. "I'm not sure, Paige. What would we do in that city anyway? Go to the casino? We've got almost no money left! And we're not going to bet our last dollar, are we?"

"I guess not," Paige mumbled. "You're right, Em."

Emily studied her girlfriend's face. She knew Paige well enough now to tell that something was bothering her.

"Paige..." she said in a soft voice. "What do you have in mind? Tell me."

Paige shrugged. "No, it's nothing. Forget it, Em. That was a terrible idea anyway."

"Paige," Emily repeated. "We're a team, okay? So if you really want to go to Vegas, we'll go to Vegas. Who knows, maybe we'll be lucky enough to win at the casino?" she winked.

Paige raised her eyes and grinned at the raven-haired girl, her head slightly tilted.

"Who knows," she said. "But you know, Em, I feel as if I've already won the jackpot, or the lottery, or whatever game of chance. Because I've got you."

"Oooh, really? You've got me?" Emily teased with a wiggle of her eyebrows. "Are you sure about that?"

"Well," Paige said, a smug smile on her lips. "Last time I checked, you were all mine. And you didn't seem to be complaining about it."

"Really? I don't remember well," Emily said with her best poker face. "Last time was a long, long time ago."

Paige widened her eyes in mock shock. "A long time ago? It was last night! Don't you remember how you got this huge hickey on your neck?"

"Really?" Emily teased. "Are you sure? And what hickey?"

Paige huffed. "Let me refresh your memory," she said, pulling Emily tight against her and kissing her, before pushing her down on their bed.

An hour later, they were lying in each other arm's, basking in post-sex bliss, when Emily put the subject of Las Vegas back on the table.

"So, tell me, why Vegas?"

"Uh?" Paige said, startled.

"What's so fun in Vegas, in your opinion?" Emily asked. "Knowing you, I don't think this is about the thrill of gambling, is it?"

"No," Paige confirmed with a half-smile. "It's not about that at all, Em."

"So, what else did you have in mind, McCullers?" Emily said, before dropping a slight kiss on Paige's forehead.

"Well," Paige begin, her voice a little unsure, "I thought that maybe we could... you know, try one of those Las Vegas fake weddings?"

Emily disentangled herself from Paige's arms and stared at her girlfriend, taken aback.

"What?"

Paige gulped. Emily's shocked face was almost comical, but it was hard to tell whether she was just surprised or shocked -or angry.

"Just for the fun of it?" Paige said hastily. "Since it doesn't count anyway."

Emily opened and closed her mouth a few times, seemingly at a loss for words.

"So..." she eventually scoffed. "I don't know if I should feel flattered, or offended."

Paige bit her lip hard as realization dawned on her.

"Oh shit..." she stammered, an apologetic look on her face. "I didn't mean... I'm so lame... Emily, I'm sorry. I want you to marry me, I so want that, just, not yet. And I want a real, beautiful wedding, well, not too big, but with all our families and friends, of course, not that Vegas fake thing... I just thought it would be fun, but now I..."

Emily suddenly burst into laughter, interrupting Paige's rambling.

"...Paige," she giggled, "Do you realize that Las Vegas weddings are _for real_?"

"What?" Paige protested. "No, Em. They're not."

"They are," Emily affirmed.

"No, they're not," Paige said stubbornly. "They're just for fun. Or for show, or whatever."

It took all of Emily's powers of persuasion, and some fact-checking on the internet, to convince Paige that, indeed, Vegas weddings _were_ real weddings.

"Okay", Paige eventually admitted. "My idea wasn't the best idea of the year, I grant you that."

"No way," Emily smirked. "And Paige, baby, please promise me something. When it's time, let me do the proposal, okay?..."

* * *

 **A/N: Hope you liked it! (If you did, please review). Just so you know, next chapter will be the last one**.


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: Hey everyone. So, this is it. The last chapter... I hope you'll like it (if it's too fluffy, well, it's probably because I'm over-compensating!... what happened on the show left me with a mix of anger and sadness, but that's another story).**

 **This chapter is dedicated to** _ **siophiefandom,**_ **the best betareader ever. I gave her a lot of homework to do, and for MONTHS, guys!... So, you can really thank her. ;)** **Seriously, _siophiefandom_ , thank you so, so much for everything! (And by the way, if you guys haven't read her** **new fic, a Panna one, yet, what are you waiting for?...)**

* * *

 **San Francisco**

Spencer was busy cleaning the countertop when the doorbell of the Blue Bird Café rang.

"It's not open yet!" the slim brunette yelled, without even looking to see who had just walked in. _God, isn't the 'closed' sign on the door obvious enough?..._ Spencer thought with annoyance.

"...Oh,really? Not yet? Even for old friends?" said a well-known voice, and Spencer, startled, raised her head quickly. Her face broke into a wide grin at the sight of the couple in front of her.

"Emily, Paige! You're back!"

Spencer literally fell into Emily's arms, the raven-haired girl eagerly returning the hug. Paige couldn't help but laugh at Spencer's enthusiasm, before hugging her friend in turn.

"It's great to see you again, Spence," she said. "We missed you."

Spencer let go of Paige and gave her a playful tap on the shoulder. "Really, McCullers? Did you even have time to think about me? Because you promised daily Paily updates, and I barely got a few texts from you two. Out of sight, out of mind!"

Paige opened her mouth to protest, but Emily intervened. "You two are really like annoying siblings. Before you argue some more, can I have a tall Americano, Spence? Please," she asked with her best dimpled smile and a blink of her long, dark eyelashes.

Spencer rolled her eyes dramatically. "Could anyone say no to this face?... No need to answer, Paigey, I already know you can't. How was the honeymoon, by the way?" she teased.

Emily and Paige beamed at each other, the matching sparkle in their eyes obviously not lost on Spencer.

"It was... great," Paige said after a beat, her eyes still glued on Emily's. "No, it was... more than great. It was perfect."

"Perfect," Emily confirmed, before leaning in to peck Paige's lips.

"I see," Spencer smirked. "Please don't mind me, lovebirds. Good old Spencer Hastings is just here to provide free coffee anyway."

Paige shook her head fondly and reached for Spencer's arm, squeezing it slightly. "Seriously, Spence, we really missed you. Next road trip we take, you come along with us, okay?" she said enthusiastically, earning a soft giggle from Emily.

"Paige, baby, I'm not sure that Spencer would really want to be the third wheel," the raven-haired girl stated. "Right, Spence?..."

Spencer shot Emily a wink. "Your words, not mine, Fields."

She grabbed the coffee pot and poured Emily a large cup. "There you go, Princess. Now, tell me all about your trip. Not the obvious - I already know that you two spent a lot of time _doing it,_ as Hanna would say. You're both virtually glowing, it's almost disgusting."

"Spencer!" Emily protested, her cheeks slightly flushed. She quickly took a sip of her coffee.

"Mmm, it's good," she said, her eyes closed. "Your coffee has always been the best, Spence."

"Hey, you're talking to a Hastings," Spencer retorted. "Caffeine kinda runs in our blood. By the way, you want a coffee too, McCullers?"

"Sure, Spence," Paige smiled. "With one of those donuts, maybe?" she ventured, eyeing the treats displayed on the counter.

"Paige," Emily chastised. "Another donut?... Spencer, I swear, she ate at least three donuts a day during our trip. Not really an athlete's diet. Swim practice starts again in less than one week, Paige!" she said, pinching Paige's stomach.

The auburn girl shrugged casually. "Oh, I know. I have a great metabolism anyway. And I told you, Em, all those treats were for research."

"For... research?" Spencer asked, raising her eyebrows skeptically.

"Yeah, I'm seriously thinking about writing a travel guide," Paige explained. "I've already got the title: _Donuts and Diners._ "

Spencer glanced at Emily. "Is she serious?" she whispered.

"Not really," Emily giggled. "At least, I hope not."

* * *

One hour later, when Rebecca, the other Blue Bird waitress, entered the Café, the three friends were still chatting animatedly across a table.

"Emily!" the blonde girl exclaimed, before rushing to greet her friend. Emily stood up to hug her. "Hey, it's good to see you," she said warmly.

"You too, Em. You look stunning, girl! I guess the road trip was dope?"

"Oh, it was, apparently," Spencer intervened. "I'll let you three catch up. I still have a few things to do, and we open in ten."

She left the table, ignoring Paige's pleading look. The auburn girl hadn't forgotten her brief, but tense, encounter with Emily's colleague. Of course, things had changed since then. Still, Paige didn't feel comfortable under Rebecca's stare.

"Hey, Paige," the blonde girl said, her tone even.

"Hey," Paige answered, dipping her head slightly.

"It's nice to see you again," Rebecca said, earning a surprised look from Paige.

"Really?" Paige asked. She glanced at her girlfriend, who had remained silent. Emily shot Paige a reassuring smile and nodded.

"Of course," Rebecca confirmed. "As long as Emily here is happy again - and I can tell that she is- we're good. Don't you think?"

"Yes," Paige smiled, relieved.

"And by the way," the blonde waitress resumed, "You also have a great advocate in Spencer. She can't stop praising you. It's always 'Paige did this, Paige said that', etc. It's getting boring. It's about time you got back, Em. And I'm sure the customers will agree with me, by the way," she added, lowering her voice.

"Why?" Emily asked, concerned. "Don't they like Spence? I thought she was doing well?"

"Oh, she is," Rebecca deadpanned. "When she's not urging them to pick up their orders quicker or even to _eat_ faster."

"Hey, I can hear you, you know," Spencer interjected from behind the counter. "It's not my fault that some people are so undecided. And so _slow._ "

Emily and Rebecca exchanged an amused look.

"See what I mean?..." Rebecca whispered.

* * *

 _ **Berkeley**_

Emily put her travel bags down at the door of her dorm room and breathed a sigh of relief. _Both_ of the elevators in Stern Hall, her residence, were out of order - and, as Emily noted with annoyance, the school year hadn't even started yet. She'd had to carry her three heavy bags all the way up to her floor.

Being away all summer had it perks - but not when it came to luggage, especially since most of them contained dirty clothes. Emily already knew that she would be on laundry duty for the next few days.

The raven-haired girl fumbled in her pocket, searching for her keys, when the door burst open, revealing an all too familiar figure.

"Hello, Emily," Grace said in an unusual, perky tone. "Welcome back."

Emily stared at her roommate, a bit taken aback. Grace, her annoying, judgmental roommate, whom she had fought with so many times during freshman year, was actually _smiling_ _nicely_ at her.

"Oh, hello, Grace," Emily said, her voice a little hesitant. "I didn't know you would be back already."

Grace's eyebrows raised a bit, but she didn't seem mad, Emily noticed with relief.

"Not that it's a bad thing," Emily quickly added. "It's nice to see you again," she said politely.

"It's nice to see you too, Emily. Let me help you," Grace offered, before grabbing one of Emily's travel bags.

"Oh, okay. Thanks, Grace," Emily said with a thankful smile, before reaching out for the remaining luggage and following Grace into the room.

Once inside, Emily took a look around. It was still the same dorm room as before, of course, but the atmosphere seemed different. More welcoming.

"Did you... did you change something?" Emily asked.

Grace shot her a half-hesitant, half-proud smile. " Well, I bought a new desk lamp, and this potted plant, and some cushions for my bed. There's even one for you, if you want. And do you like the new poster?"

She motioned to the wall above her bed, where she had hung up a poster that said _'Old ways won't open new doors'_ , with the picture of a zen garden.

Emily stared at the wall, and then at Grace. _What the heck happened to her this summer?..._

"It's... nice," Emily ventured, before adding: "I think it's really great, Grace."

Her roommate's face lit up. "Really? I didn't know whether or not you would like it. It's not much, I... I just wanted to change a few things."

Emily nodded, her smile encouraging. Grace was making visible efforts to start fresh, so,at the very least, she could do the same.

Just then, Emily's phone went off. The taller girl shot an apologetic look at Grace, who nodded to let Emily know that it was okay for her to answer the call.

Emily took her phone from her jacket pocket and couldn't help but grin widely at the name on the screen.

"Hey babe," she said, beaming. "...Yes, I'm in the dorms. Have you made it to Stanford?... Good. Are you settled yet? ...What?...Oh, yes, everything's fine here. Except I miss you already," she said, lowering her voice a little.

She peeked at Grace, but her roommate didn't roll her eyes or sigh the way she used to, back in freshman year, whenever Emily was talking on the phone. Instead, she just shot Emily a knowing smile, before heading to the small bathroom, probably to give her some privacy, Emily realized.

"...Hey Paige," she whispered into the phone, "You know what? ...I don't think that I'll have to ask for a new roommate, after all. What?... no, no, it's still Grace, but... she is acting really nice. Yes... oh, yes, that's definitely good... No, I don't think she's faking it. I don't know what happened, but she's... she's really trying, I guess."

At the other end of the line, Paige smiled fondly. "You should give her a chance, then, Em. Everyone deserves a second chance."

* * *

 _ **Stanford**_

Paige plugged in her laptop and connected it to the Stanford network, relieved to see that the new password provided by the admission office was working. She browsed through her emails, something she had only done once or twice during her road trip with Emily.

She was surprised -in a pleasant way - to find a few welcome-back emails from some of her classmates from the previous year, and even a couple from former teachers. There was also a message from Stanford's swim coach, with an attachment: the schedule of the practices and meets for the upcoming months.

"It's gonna be a busy year," Paige thought, smiling at the sight of the intense program that the coach had planned for her athletes. She was really eager to swim competitively again, albeit a little anxious. She knew that, somehow, she'd have to prove her coaches and teammates that she was still worthy of swimming for the Stanford Cardinals.

But Paige felt ready. After all, she had faced much more difficult challenges during the past year.

There was also an email from Natalie. Paige hadn't heard from the petite blonde girl since the evening they had spent together - along with a very pissed off Spencer- in a bar in Palo Alto, a few weeks earlier, after their impromptu meeting on campus.

" _Hey Paige_ ," Natalie had written, _"I hope you're doing well. From what I saw in your Instagram, I can tell that you and Emily had quite the romantic road trip adventure._ _(Those Grand Canyon pics were amazing, by the way. I think I already know the destination for my next trip!)_

 _I'm so happy for you, Paige. Really, really happy. You deserve the best of everything. Well, (almost) everybody does, I guess, but you especially, Paige McCullers. Don't ever doubt it - and if you do, remember what I said to you that night in Berlin. Promise?..._

 _Okay, then. Some fresh news from your crazy Aussie-Frenchie friend, now. I won't be going to Stanford, or to any other American college for that matter. I've decided to enroll in Sydney University. They offered me a full scholarship to their Art School, can you believe it?... I'm so excited. That's my dream come true, seriously! You know how much I love drawing. And ,this way, I'll be closer to my dad (well, in a way, because he lives in Melbourne now)._

 _So, Paigey, we won't be study buddies at Stanford after all. I'm not worried, though, because I know you will do wonders. And that you're not alone anymore._

 _I really hope we meet again someday, maybe in Paris, who knows?... I'd love to meet Emily, and I remember you told me that she has always wanted to go there._

 _Oh, tell Spencer I say hello, by the way! (and I really mean it). She's a great friend for you._

 _Take care, and stay strong, my favorite travel companion, and if you need me, well, I'll be just a sixteen-hour-flight away!... ;) Seriously, don't be a stranger. Love, Natalie."_

* * *

 _ **Epilogue - Eight months later**_

The sun was high above Lakeport, its vibrant rays making the surface of the lake glisten in a duet of silver and gold sprinkles. It was officially early Spring, but the temperatures had already reached the mid-seventies. And there wasn't a single cloud in the sky on that gorgeous Saturday. Throughout the afternoon, the garden of the McCullers cabin had been filled with laughter coming from the small group of people it hosted that day.

Emily was stretched out on a deck chair, her fingers lazily playing with the straw in her almost empty ice tea glass, when she heard a small bark. Smiling, the raven-haired girl took off her sunglasses and reached out to pet the fluffy, black-and-white dog at her feet. "Hellooo, Stanley," she cooed at the puppy. "Hello, sweetie boy. Who's the cutest puppy in the world? Who?"

Stanley demonstrated his approbation of Emily's words by eagerly licking first her fingers, and then her face.

Giggling, Emily took the small dog in her hands and kissed his little black nose, before putting him down on the ground, much to the puppy's disappointment.

"He really likes you, doesn't he?" said a low voice behind her, and Emily, startled, turned her eyes to a smiling Nick McCullers. The older man sat down on the lawn chair near Emily, Stanley immediately jumping on his lap. Nick huffed, but didn't make a move to remove the dog.

"Oh, I do like him too, and he knows that," Emily smiled. "Who can seriously say no to this puppy face?"

"Not me, I'm afraid," Nick admitted with a small shrug. "At first, he wasn't even allowed in my bedroom, and now, he sleeps at the foot of my bed every night."

"Oh, really?" Emily asked, though she wasn't that surprised. She had gotten to know Paige's father pretty well over the past months, and she had quickly realized that, behind his well-guarded façade, Nick McCullers was a softie. Like his daughter.

Nick had adopted the puppy three months earlier from a shelter, and the dog had barely left his side since. Nick had started his own business in January, and since then, he mostly worked from home, so it wasn't a problem to have the dog with him at all time - usually sleeping at his feet when Nick was working on his computer or was on the phone with some clients.

Paige and Emily had chosen the dog's name - Stanley, as a contraction for "Stanford" and "Berkeley," their respective colleges. It was officially Nick's dog, but Stanley had quickly become the mascot of the entire extended family.

"So Emily, how are your studies going?" Nick asked the girl. "Um, sorry. Maybe I shouldn't ask that kind of question on a weekend?"

Emily shot a reassuring smile at Paige's father. Nick had really opened up to her - and to others- since his return to California, but he was still uncomfortable with small talk sometimes.

"Oh no, it's okay, Mr. McCullers. Actually, I'm doing pretty well," Emily said. "Midterms went really well. And I've improved my swimming times, too."

"Good. That's good. Hard work always pay off. And Emily, I told you already, you can call me Nick. Mr McCullers is a bit too... formal, I guess. After all, you're practically my daughter-in-law."

Emily looked at the man, surprised. Though Paige's father had been nothing but kind to her lately, he had never voiced his thoughts -or his feelings- so directly.

"I mean, not that there is a rush for you and Paige to get more... official," the older man added quickly. "You're both still very young. It's just that... I have the feeling that you're here for the long haul, " he concluded, his eyes meeting Emily's.

The college girl just nodded, the small but confident smile on her lips and the tender look in her eyes enough to tell Nick what he needed to know.

Just then, a frisbee landed on the grass near Emily's feet, startling not only the raven-haired girl but also Stanley, who jumped off Nick's lap and quickly slipped under Emily's deck chair.

"Hey, watch out!" Nick McCullers said in his deep voice. "You're scaring the dog!"

"And you're gonna wake the babies, too!" Nora interjected from her own chair, a few feet away. "At least, try to lower your voices a bit! Especially you, Tim!"

"Me?" her husband huffed. "You're not serious. Spence and Paigey here are yelling way more than me!"

Since the middle of the afternoon, a frantic game of frisbee had been taking place in the garden, involving all the guests at first (apart from Tim and Nora's babies, of course), Stanley included. The puppy had been more than happy to run after the flying frisbee and even to jump for it (with no success, most of the time).

The game had quickly intensified, though, becoming a real competition, at Spencer's request. Nora first, and then Nick and Emily, had eventually called it a day, leaving Paige, Spencer and Tim playing the game on their own.

The three of them had very competitive natures, and their contest, though a bit messy, was really fun to watch. Nora rolled her eyes more than once at their antics, and had to scold the players for shouting too loud a couple of times, but it was obvious that she was enjoying herself just watching them.

"Sorry!" a disheveled, red-cheeked Paige panted, before grabbing the offending frisbee at Emily's feet. She leaned forward to press a quick but soft kiss on her girlfriend's forehead. "You sure you don't want to play anymore, Em?"

"No, thank you, babe," Emily smiled. "I'm really worn out."

"Not too worn out, I hope," Paige said with wiggled eyebrows, before throwing a quick glance at her dad. _Oops_ , she berated herself.  
Nick fake-coughed, to make sure Paige got his point, but didn't make any comments, much to the two girls' relief.

Paige and Emily were going to spend the night at the lake cabin, while the other guests were all driving back to the Bay Area. It had become a habit for the two college girls to spend most of their free weekends in Lakeport -when they weren't cramming for exams or weren't away for a swim meet with their respective teams.

Sometimes, Spencer joined them, if she wasn't too busy with her part-time job in Nick McCullers' new business (she was in charge of the customer-relations strategy), or her student duty as a co-editor of the Stanford Daily gazette.

In only a few months, the younger Hastings had become very involved in student life at Stanford, especially in the publishing of the college newspaper. Spencer's articles were renowned around the campus, and she had already earned a few summer internship offers from some prestigious newspapers around the country, which was rather unusual for a freshman.

When the frisbee game finally ended (with Paige as a winner, much to Spencer's disappointment), Tim and Nora called it a day. They gathered the numerous belongings they had brought with them for their twins, and Paige and Emily insisted on carrying the babies to the car and getting them settled on their safety seats.

Little Liam was still sleeping, and Emily, holding him in her arms, couldn't help but marvel at the baby's tiny but perfect features.

"He's got your nose, Paige," she observed, and Paige grinned proudly at Emily's words. "Yep, it's the Finlay nose," she confirmed. "This one, though," she added, referring to little Olivia who was in her arms, awake but silent, her big brown eyes staring intently at Paige, "has got Nora's nose, but definitely the Finlay mouth. A great mix."

"They're both adorable," Emily approved. "I wonder..." she started, not finishing her sentence, her eyes pensive.

"What?" Paige asked, curious.

Emily shot her a half-shy, half-mischievous smile. "I wonder," she whispered, "What our children will look like."

"Oh," Paige said, surprised. She and Emily hadn't discussed the subject yet. It was obvious to both of them (and their friends and relatives) that their future belonged together. Having children, though, was a more than serious matter.

When she saw the bewildered look on Paige's face, Emily quickly backtracked. "I mean, if you want kids, that is. And not now, of course. Later. Much, much later."

"Not too much later, I hope," Paige said, a fond smile on her face. "I wouldn't want our kids to have elderly parents," she joked. "And we have to start early anyway, if we want a big family."

Emily let out a small but happy giggle. "Oh, really? And how big are we talking, exactly?"

"Um, let me think... is five or six kids enough?" Paige asked with a twinkle in her eyes.

"Five or six?" Emily exclaimed, before lowering her voice, not wanting to startle the babies.

"I was thinking two or three max, Paige."

"We'll see," Paige winked. "And about what they'd look like... I guess it depends on who carries them, obviously. I suggest we take turns. It's one of the perks of us both being women," she said. "Anyway, our kids will all be incredibly gorgeous, of course. And athletic, and smart too. The total package."

"And also a bit cocky, maybe," Emily said with a roll of her eyes.

Paige smiled. "Maybe," she granted, before leaning in to press a tender kiss on Emily's lips.

Nick McCullers (with Stanley) left shortly after the Finlays. Emily and Spencer cleared up the garden area and then the kitchen, while Paige busied herself cleaning the barbecue.

"Are you sure you can't stay the night, Spence?" Emily asked, putting away the last cleaned dish . "We have a lot of leftovers."

Spencer smiled at her best friend. "It's tempting, Em, but I have something planned tonight."

"Oooh," Emily said, perked up. "Are you going to see Lewis?"

Spencer had started dating Lewis, a freshman from Wales, a couple of months earlier.

"I don't know yet," Spencer answered in a light tone. "Maybe. I told you Em, we're keeping things casual for now. I'll probably see him tonight anyway. We have this special edition of the Stanford Daily to finish for Monday," she explained, her eyes sparkling in anticipation.

"Great," Emily approved. "Don't forget to save me a copy, as usual. I love reading your articles."

"Of course, Em. But you do know that you can read the Daily online, right?" Spencer teased.

"Oh yeah, I know," Emily said with a small shrug. "But I love the paper edition more. And, that way, I can send it to my mom afterwards. Do you know that she's keeping all your articles? She's even made an album of them!"

"Wow, really?" Spencer asked, surprised. "I'm flattered. Your mother is so supportive, Em."  
She was smiling, but the slight falter in her tone wasn't lost on Emily, who put a supportive hand on her friend's shoulder.

"Things are still rough with your parents, Spence? I thought things were a bit better now, especially after your mother and Melissa visited you last month?"

Spencer sighed. "Yes, they're better. Sort of . My mother and I talk, at least. Not very... personal conversations for now, but still, that's an improvement. As for my father... well, that's another story," she concluded, lowering her eyes.

"It will get better, Spencer," Emily assured the slim brunette. "I'm sure about that."

* * *

After Spencer's departure, Emily and Paige decided to bathe in the lake. The sun was setting, but the temperature was still warm enough for them to enjoy the water.

The two swimmers raced each other a bit, but mostly spent their time splashing each other playfully and sharing numerous laughs and kisses.

The evening found Paige and Emily sitting side by side on the small wooden deck, their bare legs brushing, their hands entwined. A light breeze was coming from the lake, and the beautiful scenery was almost silent, except for the occasional quack coming from the ducks in the reeds.

Emily let out a contended sigh and said, "I wish we could stay here we really have to leave tomorrow? "

Paige smiled fondly. "I know, Emily. I do, too. But maybe we'd grow tired of it if we lived here?... It's better somehow to have this... special place to go, when we want or when we need it, don't you think? That way, we can enjoy it fully."

Emily nodded, a soft smile on her lips. "When did you become so wise, Paige McCullers?" she joked, but she was indeed impressed by Paige's words.

Paige shrugged, a bit embarrassed, before lifting Emily's hand and kissing her knuckles softly.

"...I don't know that I'm wise," she said sincerely. "But I've learned so much, loving you, Em."

Emily's heart swelled at her girlfriend's words. "So did I," she beamed. "And I love you too, by the way."

Paige's faces lit up, and she leaned in to press a reverent kiss on Emily's lips. "I love you more," she whispered in her husky voice.

"I don't think that's even possible," Emily said in the same hushed tone, earning a happy sigh from Paige.

"You know, Em," the auburn girl resumed after a beat, "My mom used to say that the Lakeport cabin was her safe haven. I guess it's mine, now... And ours, too, if you're okay with that."

"More than okay," Emily beamed. "I feel blessed, and honored, Paige."

They remained silent for a while, reflecting on their thoughts and feelings, until Paige cleared her throat.

"So, Fields, let's talk business now," she began in a half-serious, half-joking tone. "Ready for next Thursday? The much-awaited swim meet between Stanford and Berkeley?..."

Emily grinned at her girlfriend. "Oh, I'm more than ready, McCullers. Be prepared to get your ass kicked!"

"Oooh, really?" Paige said, rolling her eyes playfully. "That's what you think?"

"Totally," Emily deadpanned, her trademark dimpled smile in full display. "Especially in the relay. My backstroke beats yours every time, as much as it pains me to break it to you, babe."

Paige huffed in mock offense. "Okay, maybe the backstroke isn't my strongest suit, but I have better moves, you know. In and out the pool."

Emily shook her head fondly, and leaned in to purr in Paige's ear: "Oh yeah, I know. It's probably why you're more a top than a bottom."

"Your words, not mine, Fields," Paige retorted with a smug smile, earning a happy laugh from Emily, who replied by tickling her girlfriend's side.

"Stop that!" Paige shrieked. "You know that I'm extremely ticklish, Emily!"

Emily shot her a devious smile. "Oh yes, I know that, too. Come to think of it, I know a lot more things about you now."

"And... that's good, right?" Paige asked, suddenly a little unsure.

Emily leaned closer and softly stroked Paige's cheek, staring in her expressive brown eyes.

"Oh yeah, that's definitely good. I will never be tired of everything Paige McCullers," she said, before capturing her girlfriend's lips in a deep, loving kiss.

"...Wow," Paige breathed when they separated. "Great, because you know what? I'll never be tired of you, either, Emily Fields."

 **THE END**

* * *

 **A/N: So, it's been a ride. This story is (by far) my longest one. When I started writing it, I wasn't sure I could do it (believe me, writing a sequel is really, really difficult). I hope I gave our beloved characters justice. I want to thank all of you, from the bottom of my heart, for the amazing feedback. The views, the reviews, the PMs. It means the world to me, really. Sometimes I curse myself for being involved in the PLL drama (!), but there's something I'm really grateful for: the amazing Paily fandom. You're great people, folks, and I love you all! (Okay, I'm gonna stop now, because I'm getting too emotional.)** _ **Subway20**_


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